Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

My mother is insisiting on hiring some help for me. Since DH works long hours in the summer she wants me to get someone in here a few days a week to help with the boys (since I'll be 9 mnths preggo in August)

She also wants to hire someone to help me after the baby is born. She feels that since she can't do it herself since she works, she wants to pay for it.

I would never have considered this beforehand but I don't think I'll have much help after this csection and won't be able to lift Tyler for awhile.

WWYD? How awkward is it to have someone helping you?

Message edited 1/27/2011 7:43:51 AM.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Yes, I would. I hired a doula. best Money ever spent. I had her for a month. the best is that she gave me a receipt and I sen tit in to my insurance and I got a lot of it back.

If your mother is offering, I would take her offer..

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I would in a heartbeat!

We had a baby nurse for 3 weeks after DD was born.

After DS was born, we hired her again for 8 weeks.

It was a TREMENDOUS help. Especially since I was recovering from a c-section and had a very clingy 18 month old. I was able to get the rest I needed and spend time with DD to help her acclimate to the new baby.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I waited for the longest time to get help with DC. Like until he was 2 because of $$$

It was stupid. I realized I could hire a mother helper for $6 per hour. It helped me getting things done in the house even for just a few hours. She used to come for 3-4 hours at a time.

I regretted not getting one sooner.

I would get the baby nurse though after birth. And mother helper before you give birth.

Message edited 1/27/2011 7:51:29 AM.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I'm kind of wondering if I could just find a mother's helper who would continue on when the baby is born.

I don't necessarily need help with the baby, but moreso with the older two. I would have to figure out some sort of schedule that works best.

I am even thinking of offering my aunt who just retired to come here and we'll pay her. At that point she may welcome a little extra cash (although I'm sure it would be a brawl for her to take it)

UGH!

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I didn't have a baby nurse- but I had my Mom, who is a nurse, help me out.

She came for 6 weeks ( I live 7 hours away) and stayed with me after #2 was born. My toddler (35 pounds) was very active. I needed help with him, since I had a c-section and had issues with lifting him, etc. So pretty much, she took care of him while I took care of the baby.

She also got up one night a week to do the nighttime feedings so I could sleep.

I don't know if this is your 3rd c-section or not. But my SIL had 3 c-sections and she said the recovery from the 3rd was the longest, and hardest. She had her Mom for a while, and also a mother's helper after that, she really needed the help with her older 2 boys. So I think you should definitely take your Mom up on her offer!

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I think a mother's helper would be a good idea. I did that when I was younger.

I helped mostly with the older child while mom was with the newborn. I also stayed with the NB so Mom could take the older child for special "dates" like ice cream parlour date or whatever :)

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Our mother helper was great with DC. Plays with him. Indoors, outdoors (swingset, etc...). It's def. worth it. She actually comes to each birthday party with DC. She helps me watch DC while we have the party.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Posted by Diana1215

Posted by Annie91606

I didn't have a baby nurse- but I had my Mom, who is a nurse, help me out.

She came for 6 weeks ( I live 7 hours away) and stayed with me after #2 was born. My toddler (35 pounds) was very active. I needed help with him, since I had a c-section and had issues with lifting him, etc. So pretty much, she took care of him while I took care of the baby.

She also got up one night a week to do the nighttime feedings so I could sleep.

I don't know if this is your 3rd c-section or not. But my SIL had 3 c-sections and she said the recovery from the 3rd was the longest, and hardest. She had her Mom for a while, and also a mother's helper after that, she really needed the help with her older 2 boys. So I think you should definitely take your Mom up on her offer!

Yep, 3rd Csection!!

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Do it! My mom got us a baby nurse for a few weeks in the beginning - totally worth it. You will absolutely need the help!

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I think this is a great idea. When you are 9 months pregnant you could definitely use the help with 2 boys. Also, after you c-section help would be great since you will definitely not be bale to lift your children. Definitely take her up on her offer.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Take the help. Especially considering when you're due; if next summer is anything like last, it's gonna be rough.

I had a mother's helper come once a week last summer, to watch J just so I could get stuff done around the house. It was a tremendous help.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

A lot of the moms I know hired a mother's helper when they went from 2 to 3 kids or from 3 to 4. I think if I had three a mother's helper would be a BIG help especially in the beginning. If for nothing more than to take the older kids on walks, to the playground or in the backyard while you feed or take care of the baby.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I would do baby nurse.
Try it, if you don't like it make a switch.

But I am currently on my 11th month of nursing at night...so the thought of a magically nurse coming through seems wonderful

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I never had a baby nurse, but I did continue to have my babysitter come 2x/week to help me with my older DS and clean and pick up around the house.

It was an absolute godsend. Especially in your case, with recovery from a c-section and 2 little boys running around.

Like the other said, if you get a mother's helper, they can entertain the older boys while you tend to the baby, or you can all go on walks together or the park, or whatever.

And once you are comfortable, let her stay with the baby while you have one on one time with the boys.

It's really nice to have an extra hand.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I don't know, my SIL had a rough recovery from her 3rd and devoleped a staff infection. It took 6 weeks for her incinsion to heal. Now with that said, she lives in a 2 family with my in-laws and my BIL comes home at 3:30. She had the help and it still happened, because she didn't take it easy. If you take it easy I think the recovery will be a better experience.

She is a lot like you and wants to things for her self. She took it easy for the most party but also would try and lift middle one every once an while. Her kids are all 28 months apart.

Maybe a night time nurse since you FF and then have your aunt come by durning the day. I feel like you will need the help with bringing the kids to and from school the most.

Message edited 1/27/2011 9:07:15 AM.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I would most definitely want a mother's helper!!

Someone that would be able to take the older kids places and keep them active while I was at home with the NB.

Also, baby nurses are there for only a certain amount of time (if I'm right) so to have a mother's helper could potentially mean someone for an extended amount of time, babysitting so you guys could get a night out, etc etc.

I just see more benefits for everyone with a mother's helper. Some also do light housecleaning and cooking.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

start with a mothers helper and than after baby you can see if you would like or need a nurse . imo

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

me personally I would not hire any help. I feel like I should be able to do it by myself.

I would however, if we had the means, hire a house cleaner to at least free me from that.

I think in the summer you'll be ok bc the boys will be playing outside a lot. I thought it was going to be worse but it wasn't that bad bc the girls were having fun in the sun and I ws able to sit and watch most of the time.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

forgot aboutnthe c-section part... idk bc I never had one. Do you think you'll need help? If so, then that's your answer.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Personally I wouldn't be able to do the baby nurse - have someone in my house during the night hours, etc.
But a mother's helper sounds like a good idea!

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Definitely mothers helper for before and after. I think babies are easy, you feed them, burp them, change them, love on them and they dont MOVE.

The older kids will be moving, bored, maybe a little jealous of the baby so its them that will need all the attention.

I had a mothers helper for a few hours a week for the first few weeks when DS was born as I felt guilty that DD was not getting attention and she was a life saver. She entertained her outside and it gave me a chance to spend time with DS and get some things done ( I am not one to rest but rest would have happened during these hours too if I had been tied down)

Go for the mothers helper especially if you are having a C section.

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

Re: Would you hire a baby nurse - or a mothers helper?

I had 2 c sections, however, DD was in the NICU for over a month. By the time she got home, I was completley healed.
I also lucked out because my inlaws are right next door (6 months of the year) and they were able to get DS to school and stuff while I healed. If I didn't have them, I would have definitley hired someone to help with running DS around and cleaning etc. DH went back to work and took his "paternity leave" a month later when DD came home.
That helped too.

Definitley hire someone!