xposr: stressed is an understatement. any advice?

This may be long and I'm not sure what I'm looking for with this post...maybe some clarity or support and prayers. My stress level is now officially off the charts.
Tomorrow I will be 37 weeks pregnant and I have an almost 16 month old dd. The original plan was for my parents to take care of dd when dh is at the hospital with me (parents come up in the am, watch dd then dh would pick her up at night). Unfortunately we found out my dad needs a valve replacement (aorta). He has had heart issues/and multiple surgeries due to his condition including a bypass two years ago. Because of the severity of the valve issue, it has to be immediately....Wednesday in fact. Because of his other health issues, it is being done in Cornell in NYC (an hour away). It is killing me I can't be there the day of the surgery nor travel in to see my dad. He will be in for about two weeks. My mom will be at the hospital for my Csection if possible (her request).
Part two of stress. I am high risk and see a perinatologist. The past three weeks I have had nst scans and all three have had issues that required extra monitoring. Including Friday. On Friday my bp was also off the chars and I was sent to labor and delivery for monitoring. Luckily I do not have preeclampsia I was just stressed. My ob came to see me in the hospital and told me we are pushing my Csection up to Friday because once I am 37 weeks it's time to get him out because If I leave him in too long, he is concerned the baby will not make it (did wonders for my bp). So I work it out with mil that she can watch ddi (she works 4 jobs total and just started her main job so she has not acquired any time off yet.) I feel better all weekend that dd has someone to watch her, etc. I call my obs office thismorning to find out if there's anything I need to do for Fri or if they will just call me with a time. Dr gets on the phone and barely has a recollection of what went down on Friday. Tells me to come see him Thursday and keep my perinatologist appt for Friday and if need be, we will then deliver on Friday. I'm just upset because mil changed everything around and most likely will not be able to do it again and if she can't, I'm kind of up a creek with what to do with my dd. So I'm in the process of trying to figure this out. I'm really upset because my Dr scared the life out of me Friday and come Monday it's as if it's no big deal.

Re: xposr: stressed is an understatement. any advice?

I am so sorry you are going through this! Can you just tell him you want the c-section set for Friday?

That isn't something I would normally do but given what you are going through it sounds like you need to have a plan in place.

ETA: I would be VERY concerned he doesn't recall the conversation.

Message edited 12/31/2012 12:08:27 PM.

Re: xposr: stressed is an understatement. any advice?

I don't mind if the baby stays in I just want to know he is safe I have a lump in my throat each time I do a kick count (3x per day). I just can't believe how much my doctor's level of concern changed between Friday and today. Plus trying to stay calm so my bp doesn't spike is no small task. I just pray my dad and ds are both ok and that we are all together celebrating in two weeks.

Re: xposr: stressed is an understatement. any advice?

Areyou trying to plan on someone watching your daughter all day on all those days, so that DH can be with you at the hospital ?

That may not be possible. It wasn't for me with the 2nd child.

family chipped in quick to watch her for the delivery. Then DH went home to take care of DD. The next few days. He came with DD to the hospital. Unless someone was available (usually not).

It's harder the 2nd time around to figure everything.

But it will all work out.


Try to stay calm.
Enjoy your days with DD.