Kindergarten help

I have some questions and could use some input/suggestions. I do plan to call the teacher and touch base with her today; but figured Id look to all the "experts" as well!

First and foremost; DS is struggling with the seperation. He had been in daycare since he was 22 months old, but I was there with him. Although I had very limited time to see him in his classroom during the day, Id always try to pop in during lunch for a kiss and he'd see me in the hallways and stuff...

The first day of school he came home sick (104 fever)- so we missed the 2nd day of school.

He came home on Monday andTuesday happy and excited but mentioned he missed me. Yesterday he said he started to cry in class because he missed me; this morning he woke up crying begging me to stay home with him. Then he mentioned that (yesterday) he was crying in his hands, and the teacher pulled him into the hallway. My heart is breaking and I dont know how to "fix" it...We've read the kissing hand, we kiss eachothers hand everyday before we leave. We have a count down until when we can "be together" on the weekend going on the calendar..

He isnt one to give alot of information, I get bits and pieces here and there, and Im literally asking 100 questions each day. The thought of him being sad, and "alone" just kills me!

Then snack: They have a snack in the classroom each morning. On the first day of school a memo came home asking that AM snack be placed in a labeled brown bag (seperate from the lunch box)- so I did/do that- and yet the snack is coming home EVERY SINGLE DAY. Im sending a granola bar and a water juice box, and when Im asking why he didnt eat it, he says he "isnt hungry"- which is fine, but according to him everyone else is eating... What is he doing while everyone else is having snack time????
Does the teacher think he doesnt have anything? Is he unable to find it? (although I show it to him, in his bag EVERY MORNING!)

Lunch: Ive been sending a lunchable and that isnt coming home, but I have no clue whether or not he is eating it... But EVERYSNACK I put in his lunchbox is... Out of desperation I put fruit snacks in there yesterday, thinking he'd def. eat that- and sure enough it came home untouched! When I ask why, he says he "doesnt have enough time"

Ryan is not a big eater; He isnt picky- he hates all food Its always been a struggle to get him to eat SOMETHING... But the kid is coming home STARVING- so clearly he isnt eating or drinking during the day!

What goes on with lunch and snack time? How much time do they get? Does someone help the kindergartners open their food? I know they can't MAKE him eat- but he cant go entire day w/o eating SOMETHING!

I went from a world where I knew everything about his day, to knowing absolutely nothing and Im really struggling with it!

Please help me!!!

Re: Kindergarten help

Wanna go out for a drink Im kidding.
TBH...in this situation its only been like a week so I would wait it out. No doubt, talk to the teacher and find out what is happening. IMHO, he probably needs time to adjust. Did any other children end up in the same school with him that he knows? Its probably just an adjustment period for him. I am sure it will get better.

BTW...are you switching districts in a month???

Re: Kindergarten help

Posted by PrincessP

Wanna go out for a drink Im kidding.
TBH...in this situation its only been like a week so I would wait it out. No doubt, talk to the teacher and find out what is happening. IMHO, he probably needs time to adjust. Did any other children end up in the same school with him that he knows? Its probably just an adjustment period for him. I am sure it will get better.

BTW...are you switching districts in a month???

Re: Kindergarten help

Posted by 05mommy09

Posted by PrincessP

Wanna go out for a drink Im kidding.
TBH...in this situation its only been like a week so I would wait it out. No doubt, talk to the teacher and find out what is happening. IMHO, he probably needs time to adjust. Did any other children end up in the same school with him that he knows? Its probably just an adjustment period for him. I am sure it will get better.

BTW...are you switching districts in a month???

I agree with the time... but until them I just want to crawl into a cave and cry for him!

The food thing- I almost feel like its a lost cause, if no one is going to tell him to eat- he just isnt!

He is the only one from pre-k in his school.. and I have no idea whats going on with this house; supposed to sign contracts this week and closing is expected to move quickly- but we shall see! So we SHOULD be moving w/in a month but who knows!

Re: Kindergarten help

Posted by PrincessP

Posted by 05mommy09

Posted by PrincessP

Wanna go out for a drink Im kidding.
TBH...in this situation its only been like a week so I would wait it out. No doubt, talk to the teacher and find out what is happening. IMHO, he probably needs time to adjust. Did any other children end up in the same school with him that he knows? Its probably just an adjustment period for him. I am sure it will get better.

BTW...are you switching districts in a month???

I agree with the time... but until them I just want to crawl into a cave and cry for him!

The food thing- I almost feel like its a lost cause, if no one is going to tell him to eat- he just isnt!

He is the only one from pre-k in his school.. and I have no idea whats going on with this house; supposed to sign contracts this week and closing is expected to move quickly- but we shall see! So we SHOULD be moving w/in a month but who knows!

I always put 3 snacks in Gillys lunch box...SO in the event that she decides to not eat one thing, she has 2 other options. Most of the time she eats 2/3 things. Which is fine. Can you throw in more snacks then just the granola bar? I limit night time snacking to make sure she eats during the day.

Re: Kindergarten help

Last year when my DD was in K we had the same issue with food and her not eating, especially lunch. When I spoke to the teacher she said that the K shares the cafeteria with two other older grades and the little kids seem mezmerized watching the older kids, and time goes by quick and they dont get a chance to eat

Also after speaking to DD it seems that since they were the 3rd group to use the cafteria she felt it was dirty and is very ocd and didnt want to eat with any mess near her.

After speaking to the teacher she asked one of the lunch aides to check on DD to see if she needed help opening anything or had any issue. After a few weeks she seem to get the hang of everything and was eating better.

Def talk to the teacher to see what else could be going on, hopefully in another week or 2 he will be all settled into the routine

Re: Kindergarten help

I could have written your post! First, yesterday was the very 1st full day for my DD. She is the youngest in the class, not 5 until December and my youngest so I'm so concerned about her. Plus, she just started her 1st time at after school, which she did not like. She cried when I dropped her off this morning, (2nd full day, 4th day of school) and it broke my heart, but I wasn't suprised since I know it takes a few days to settle in sometimes.

They just get sucked into this vaccuum and I feel like I don't know anything that is going on, and I know that I have to let go a bit.

She also has a separate snack in a brown paper bag which came back untouched! I asked her why she didn't have snack in the classroom and she said she didn't know. Her lunch was mostly eaten (a few bites of her sandwich were left in the container) and I did what the other said, where in the lunch bag I'll just put lots of stuff (2 mandarin oranges, 1/2 of a ham sandwich, string cheese, veggie chips) and I figure as long as she eats something and it's healthy she'll be okay. Also, I'm guessing based on what happened with my 2nd grader that the aides do encourage them to eat.

She also needs a snack for after school and I explained to her that she should eat whatever is left either in the brown bag or lunch bag. She didn't quite get that yet! I found out this morning that she opened up her lunch bag in the classroom and ate a snack from there (apparently she remembered this morning what she did)!!

It sucks not seeing the teacher to ask questions too.

Re: Kindergarten help

As a kindergarten teacher and mom of three whose youngest started kindergarten....I can definitly relate.

First, IMO from my experience the separation just has to be given time. Continue doing what your doing to reinforce that everything will be okay and mommy loves you. Some children separate without a problem while others it's much harder. I had a girl start to cry yesterday out of nowhere when she separated great and had been so happy to come to school. When I asked her what was wrong she told me she missed how her mom told her to "make sure you eat even the crumbs" at lunch (I guess this was their little ritual). Today at lunch...I whispered "remember to eat even the crumbs Sunny" and she was happy as can be.

Don't hesitate to contact the teacher if you need to. I welcome notes / emails from parents b/c I am still getting to know your child.

In terms of lunch / snack....it is very hard especially in the beginning of the year to get the little ones on a routine. I'm still serving my class and making sure they have their milk, lunch and napkin. As for snack, some children have literally told me "I'm not hungry" when it is snack time. As much as I try to get them to eat something, I can't physically force them if their not hungry.

I would in all honesty wait a few days or so to really allow a full adjustment to happen, trust me, it will. If not, please don't hesitate to contact the teacher...that's what we're here for.

Message edited 9/15/2010 6:12:35 PM.

Re: Kindergarten help

Re: Kindergarten help

Posted by justmefornow

Posted by RMA9728

As a kindergarten teacher and mom of three whose youngest started kindergarten....I can definitly relate.

First, IMO from my experience the separation just has to be given time. Continue doing what your doing to reinforce that everything will be okay and mommy loves you. Some children separate without a problem while others it's much harder. I had a girl start to cry yesterday out of nowhere when she separated great and had been so happy to come to school. When I asked her what was wrong she told me she missed how her mom told her to "make sure you eat even the crumbs" at lunch (I guess this was their little ritual). Today at lunch...I whispered "remember to eat even the crumbs Sunny" and she was happy as can be.

Don't hesitate to contact the teacher if you need to. I welcome notes / emails from parents b/c I am still getting to know your child.

In terms of lunch / snack....it is very hard especially in the beginning of the year to get the little ones on a routine. I'm still serving my class and making sure they have their milk, lunch and napkin. As for snack, some children have literally told me "I'm not hungry" when it is snack time. As much as I try to get them to eat something, I can't physically force them if their not hungry.

I would in all honesty wait a few days or so to really allow a full adjustment to happen, trust me, it will. If not, please don't hesitate to contact the teacher...that's what we're here for.

Thanks for writing this. I just saw a note in my DDs folder to me from her teacher. It said that she wanted to inform me that my DD missed me today after lunch and she was crying heavily and the assistant took her for a walk to calm her down. Then she was fine and joined the class at center time. This was after I sent her to school crying at 8 am. I agree it's just an adjustment but it's hard!

Re: Kindergarten help

J was coming home with things uneaten as well, but she told me that no one would open them for her so I now I send her snacks in a zip lock bag and she seems to be eating them

Re: Kindergarten help

I can't speak to the snack/lunch issue since Sarah's is 1/2 day and no snack.

But with the missing you, Sarah keeps pictures of the family in her backpack. I told her that way she'd be able to have a part of us with her all the time. I don't think she looks at them during school, but just carrying them around really cheered her up.

And we got her a charm bracelet that we all kissed a special "being brave at Kindergarten" charm that she wears most days. She said that when she was feeling sad the first few days she would touch it and it was like we were kissing her. Maybe you can get him a boyish bracelet or dogtags to wear?