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Latica523
LIF Zygote
Member since 9/10 9 total posts
Name:
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Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
Hi everyone,
I am new here. My friend at work told me about the site and asked me to try it.
I just found out that I have to have a D & C yesterday. I'm about 7wks and after many doctor appointments and second opinions this is it. I have to terminate.
I feel as though my body hates me or someone hates me that I just can't have a baby. I know I would feel just as bad as I do now if this were my first time. But, its the second. My first lived for 6 days and then we said goodbye. Never in a million years did I ever think that after hurting so bad and saying goodbye to your first baby, that I could possibly suffer again. But, here I am...suffering. I feel like EVERYONE is Pg, but me. Like everyone gets happily ever after, but I'm cursed. It doesn't help that I am in front of kids all day and it takes every fiber of my being to smile and be cheerful. But, today I broke down in front of 5yr olds and we've only known each other for about a week!
I don't know about this D & C and I'm scared. We saw a heartbeat on Monday and just yesterday I was told the hormone levels were not rising. And although I feel like the doctors know what they are talking about, it is their job, I also have this nagging feeling in my heart of "What if they are wrong"? I'm tired of people telling me It will happen, its not your time, or things happen for a reason. None of the people who have said this for the most part have ever been down this road and so that really just enrages me! But, I know they mean well.
I know that maybe I should go see a doctor who can help me understand why this keeps happening, but honestly I don't have a clue as to where to start. Any help? Sorry for just talking endlessly. I just needed to let it out and I had nowhere else to turn.
Thanks.
Jeanine
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Posted 9/16/10 9:54 PM  |
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beanie571
:-P
Member since 5/07 2509 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
I'm so sorry you are going through this. 
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| Posted 9/16/10 10:31 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name:
Jib
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
FM
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| Posted 9/16/10 10:59 PM |
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keepingsecrets
ridiculously blessed!!
Member since 7/09 1912 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
i'm so sorry you are going through this. there's a ton of supportive girls on these boards so you are in the right place. you can vent here anytime
i've had two losses as well in the past year, the last one was an ectopic and they ended up removing my right tube so i definitely can understand how sad you feel. if you want to talk, FM me anytime
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| Posted 9/17/10 7:30 AM |
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BabyHopes15
Thank you St. G for my boy PJ!
Member since 5/10 1756 total posts
Name:
Aim
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
There is nothing for me to say other than we're here and we're listening!
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| Posted 9/17/10 10:04 AM |
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sweetie101
you make me smile :o)
Member since 5/08 4419 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
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| Posted 9/18/10 12:51 PM |
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
I'm so sorry....
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| Posted 9/18/10 10:03 PM |
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
 
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| Posted 9/18/10 11:34 PM |
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bride07
Ava Rose you are an angel!!!
Member since 3/09 6115 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
I am sorry for your loss!!
I sent you an email!!! Please feel free to write to me if you need anything.
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| Posted 9/19/10 8:18 AM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
Name:
Because 2 people fell in love
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
Jeanine,
I am so sorry for your losses I know the pain in your heart and your soul all too well.
We lost our son at 26 days old. We conceived him without even TTC. 6 months after we lost him we found out both DH & I suffer from infertility issues. Dealt with other losses after this as well: had a m/c at 6 weeks, needed a D&E at 16 weeks when we lost the heartbeat (found out about that loss on the anniversary of our sons death). I had to be knocked out for that procedure, it was hard walking in with pregnancy clothes and leaving in the same pregnancy clothes knowing full well there was no baby inside of me anymore 
I know the torture of losing a baby and having additional losses as do other women on this site. No one should ever have to go through ANY of this. It is the most agonizing pain a person can have to endure.
I will be sending you an FM and please let me know if you ever need to talk
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| Posted 9/19/10 10:15 AM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name:
Jib
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
Posted by dooodles
I had to be knocked out for that procedure, it was hard walking in with pregnancy clothes and leaving in the same pregnancy clothes knowing full well there was no baby inside of me anymore
I can identify with this so clearly. In fact, I am STILL wearing some maternity clothes because of the weight I gained while pregnant I remember leaving the hospital that day. It was such a weird, empty feeling. The best part of my day was being knocked out under anesthesia 
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| Posted 9/19/10 10:52 AM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: Just need to vent and feel like I'm not alone
i am so sorry
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| Posted 9/19/10 6:30 PM |
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