Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Hi everyone. I am not a frequent poster but thought it would be good to come on here for some input.
I currently have a 3 year old and due with my second this summer. Both DH and I work full time. Our families have been kind enough to help by watching her 4 full days but I think their gracious help will be coming to an end once I have this baby.

I began looking into daycare options for two kids. Basically it comes down to 2K per month for two kids. Do you think it's worth it that I basically have to work almost 2 weeks to pay for daycare with the other two weeks money going towards the house and bills. Come September 2017, our 3 year old will be in school full time (publics school) and the daycare cost wold be cut in half.
What would you do?

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

It is such a personal decision to make. I know, I probably wouldnt be able to survive being a SAHM, unless i could get my kids in classes or some sort of activity to help pass the time...which would mean spending money while not bringing in an income. So i would say go the daycare route.

Aside from my personal sanity, my opinion is that you are still bringing home money after paying for daycare. Can you survive on taking that financial hit if you stop working?

Another thing to thing about is once your three year old starts school in 1.5 years ...would you want to go back to work at that time? Are you willing to leave the company you are at now and hope to find something as good in a year in a half (assuming its a good job of course)?

I would say take your maternity leave, and see how you feel. Look into daycares and figure out where you would want to send the kids. Even if you send them for one or two months when you go back to work, that may be all you need to see...you may love being back at work and think daycare is a must. or you may decide the time with the kids is more important and decide to pull them from daycare and quit your job. There are so many things to think about when making this decision and I think you have time to figure it out. I wouldnt give your job notice though until you are certain...its easier to try daycare and pull them out then quit your job and decide you want to work again

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my question.

I don't plan on giving my job any ideas that I would stay home. As of now, I have full intentions on returning. I'm still hopeful that family will be able to help out a bit longer and maybe even then the daycare cost would be lower. It really is such a difficult decision to make. One of my biggest fears is leaving my job and never being able to get back to where I am now. I think about years down the line and how it could affect everything.

Thank you again!

Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

I answered on the other post too. Here was my response:

If you can afford your bills without the remaining check each month, then quit but just realize depending on your industry it may be hard to get back in.

My advice would be to keep the kids in daycare. They learn so much from being in a structured setting.

Also wanted to add that you have to WANT to be a stay at home mom. Like another PP said, I am not cut out to be a SAHM and there is nothing wrong with that either. My kids thrive at daycare.

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Answered on FHF:


Even if you make $100 more a month by working (after paying off daycare), that is $100 more than you would make by staying home.
Not to mention contributing to a 401K or retirement plan and keeping your skills and resume fresh and up to date.

Also I felt my DD benefited SO much from being in daycare from an infant through Pre K. So there is that aspect as well.
The things she learned, the way she was socialized, it was invaluable to her

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

That's basically what my paycheck is for. What doesn't go to daycare, goes to bills. I stay at home one day a week other than weekends. I'm a big fan of daycare. They teach more than I could at home. Plus they get such great social interaction. My oldest just turned 2 in Sunday. I often have strangers ask me how old she is after hearing her speak and the things she knows and they are often shocked that she's not just a tiny 3 year old.

Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

i'll chime in as a SAHM. we adopted my son when he was almost 2, and he turned 5 a couple months ago. so I've been home with him for over 3 years. i LOVE being home with him- especially since we missed almost 2 years with him.... the preschool years go SO fast so i'm glad i can have the time with him before he starts full time school.
BUT- that said- its not for everybody. It can definitely be monotonous, and EXHAUSTING coming up with ways to keep them busy during the day. i'm finding that especially this year, because he missed the cut-off for K... but a lot of his little friends moved on to K, so we have less people for playdates during the days. AND most of the house stuff falls on me, just because i'm home during the day. i still wouldn't trade being home for anything--- but its not all about walking the mall or hanging out at the playground with the other mommies
AND like other people said- its not just about money right now... but think about the future- your retirement, getting back into the work force when/if you need to.... in my case, i'm a speech therapist. there are A TON of different job opportunities in my field, AND its not so much a "climbing the ladder position"- meaning that unless i want to manage a rehab clinic or something, all the positions are basically the same. so i've been keeping up my license and hopefully will be able to jump back into something pretty easily next year when DS is in school full day.
i would see how your maternity leave goes and see if you like being at home. and think about your job, too--- sometimes even if you're not bringing home a ton of money its still worth it to keep your position and your field....

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

It's a personal decision and I'm the breadwinner anyways so staying home is not an option but first consider 1) could you stay at home all day anyways? I am on week 10 of a 13-week maternity leave and I'm so ready to go back! 2) would it set you back professionally, and 3) would you want your children anyways in some sort of early education program at some point?

Re: Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

Very, very personal decision.
I've done both.
With my 1st & 2nd, I went back to work & was happy.
With my 3rd, I'm staying home for a while (not sure how long).
It will kill my career, but it was the right thing to do at that moment. I brought home slightly more $ than childcare (but my benefits were great). I will deal with re-entry when it comes! It will be a huge step back (I was up for a big promotion).
The key thing to me is that this will be short term because I identify with my career. The second factor is that I have another 30 years of work ahead of me... And now is the best time to be home a bit.

Staying home with kids vs. Daycare

I was a SAHM for the first 14 months of our son's life. That was when I noticed that I was not cut out for it. I never wanted to be a SAHM, it just happened and now I know that isn't for me. I ended up being out of work for 2 years (found out I was pregnant 2 months after losing my job). I basically had to start over. My pay is WAY down from what it was. Now, with a toddler I have to try to build myself back up in a male dominated industry.

That being say, like a PP said, you have to WANT to be a SAHM. If it's something that you would want and do not want to work anymore, then I say definitely give it a try. If you like what you do and where you want, there is nothing wrong with wanting to go to work every day.

After that being said, I saw our son develop SO much being in daycare and he LOVES it! It has helped with his social skills as well. I LOVE watching him grow from it! I won't lie, it's hard at times but for us, the pros outweigh the cons.