I have a weird playdate question - WWYD (UPDATE)

DS is in kindergarten.

A few times, a girl from his class has called to ask if he wanted to come over her house but it was always THAT day and usually we have plans on the weekend.

The weird part is that it is always the little girl or her older sister (who cant be more than 14 years old) calling to invite DS over. The mother or father has never spoken to me on the phone or otherwise. I think the sister picks her up after school and she has never come over to introduce themselves.

DS has randomly pointed the girl from his class out while we are walking to the car.

So yesterday, the little girl calls to make plans in advance but still no parental intervention whatsoever. I was waiting to see if she would pass the phone to her mom/dad and then I would get on the phone and we could discuss it.

Is this weird or am I just too confused with how playdates work?

Message edited 1/25/2013 10:57:44 AM.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

No that is really odd. My DC is older and the moms are still in charge of setting up or at least confirming the playdates.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

That is weird, and leads me to believe that your kid would be there alone with the older sister and no parents. Sounds like a no go in my book

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

How do I go forward with this? DS says that this girl is one of his best friends in school (even though he says that about almost all the kids in his class)

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

Why not ask to speak with her mom or dad when she calls. If there is concern about supervisin why not invite the child to your house instead. That way you have control over the playdate and the supervision.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

So odd- and I would not be setting up a playdate with the kid's big sister. Do you have the parents email? can you get it from the teacher? Parents email are sent home on the class list. I would email the parent about setting it up, at YOUR house, and if you don't have the email, when the girl calls again i would ask to speak to the parent.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

In my experience for Kindergarten, the parents call each other.

My guess is the 14 year old is in charge & therefore, doesn't get (1) you need advance notice (2) having the kid call when she's 5-6 yo isn't usually done.

I'd have the kid over to my house (give the 14 yo a break) until I knew the kid & the 14 year old better.

My son was friendly with a kid whose 15 yo brother was responsible for him. When we took everyone sleigh riding, I decided I'd trust the 15 yo with any kid. He made his brother wear a hat & gloves. When the kid said no, he didn't want to, the brother kept his cool & said "Ok. We're going to have to go. You cannot be sleigh riding without warm clothes on. If you're getting hot, we'll take a break & let you cool down." I was very impressed.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

If you want to go forward, I'd tell the girl/sister can I speak to your mom/dad whe they call. Or drop them an email (if you have) or call yourself to set something up. I know a lot of times kids tell me can my sons come over and I always respond with have your mom/dad call me and we will set it up.

My son had a friend from K who I never met send him a note to come over at such and such date and time once. It was weird and I couldn't make time but found it odd (the note was not written by the child - way too neat and made sense for a 5 yr old). I did call the parents and left word that we couldn't make it and if they want to set up a playdate to give me a call.

Re: I have a weird playdate question - WWYD

It gets weirder yet...
Yesterday as DS and I were leaving school, a little girl says "Bye Andrew!" and DS tells me that she is the one who called him. I see her with no adult, so I am a bit confused but its so crowded with everyone rushing to their cars. Anyway, I say "Hi ____ , tell your Mommy to call me" and magically a woman appears and is staring at me. I ask if she is ____'s Mom and she says yes. Continuing to stare at me, not saying anything. So I say that her daughter called my house yesterday. The mom laughs and says that she called everyone in the class! So I open my mouth to talk about a play date and she interrupts and says "Did it bother you? I'm so sorry!" and they whisk away into the crowd...
I guess the little girl asks her sister to call the kids in her class and the sister just says "go ahead"