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Eva Luna
Be kind...life's hard!
Member since 8/05 4750 total posts
Name:
God, bless & heal my DH, JenG's DH Rob & DebG
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Spinoff to SAHM...
So much has changed since we were kids...in today's climate & economy, will you choose to be a SAHM? It seems like it's such a sacrifice today...
To answer my own question...I don't have the desire to, nor could I be. We need our 2 incomes.
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Posted 10/11/06 8:43 AM  |
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MikesWife
Wanting...........
Member since 1/06 6887 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
At this point in time, I don't think I want to be a SAHM. But you never know once that bundle of joy enters the world.
We can't afford to have me stay home anyway, so it doesn't matter...........
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:44 AM |
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2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I do not want to be a SAHM. DH and I have decided that I will not work for the first year of the child's life. We both think it is very important for me to be home during the first year. After the first year my wonderful MIL will be taking care of the baby during the days. Most likely I will only work three days per week.
Message edited 10/11/2006 8:57:55 AM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:46 AM |
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Kissy331
My two miracles!
Member since 5/06 17826 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Both DH & I want me to be a SAHM when the time comes. Once our children are in school, I will be going back to work full time. We are fortunate enough to be able to afford for me to stay home but at the same time, I don't want to miss out on the daily things when my kids are younger
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:47 AM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I only will have children if i can be a sahm or ONLY work PT.. I believe that kids (especially when they r younger) need a parent who is home a majority of the time..
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
there are always some type of sacrifice to be made, in some way if someone really wanted to stay home with there kids it can be done..especially when half the time that 2nd income goes to daycare anyway..
no offense to any1 here this is just my opinion and what i feel would be good for me and one day my family
jmo hope i dont offend any1
eta: sahm until kids become school age, then id go back to work
Message edited 10/11/2006 8:49:42 AM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:48 AM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I feel very fortunate that I can if I want be a SAHM without having to sacrifice much. DH and I talked at length about it and at first were decided that I will be a SAHM, but now as we are TTC we've talked about it some more and have decided (as of right now, things can definately change!) that the plans are to take an extended maternity leave (6 months) and then go back to work part time (3 days a week).
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:53 AM |
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LuckySV
LIF Adult
Member since 10/05 4675 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by MrsRbk
I feel very fortunate that I can if I want be a SAHM without having to sacrifice much. DH and I talked at length about it and at first were decided that I will be a SAHM, but now as we are TTC we've talked about it some more and have decided (as of right now, things can definately change!) that the plans are to take an extended maternity leave (6 months) and then go back to work part time (3 days a week).
When we have a family I plan on doing the same (extended ML-4-6 months, then PT). I don't want to be a SAHM but I don't want to work FT either.
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| Posted 10/11/06 8:56 AM |
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MegZee
My bunny
Member since 5/06 8777 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:01 AM |
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azoodie
Member since 8/05 8377 total posts
Name:
Team SEXY BACK
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I could never be a SAHM. Not because I wouldn't want to, but because the life I've layed out for myself doesn't lead me to that. I worked really hard in school to do my masters and now my phd.
If anything, I suppose DH could stay at home but I don't think that's going to happen since he has a county job. However, I hope to go into teaching at a college and hope that my schedule will be flexible enough to accomodate children. If we have them that is...still undecided about this.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:02 AM |
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Eva Luna
Be kind...life's hard!
Member since 8/05 4750 total posts
Name:
God, bless & heal my DH, JenG's DH Rob & DebG
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
there are always some type of sacrifice to be made, in some way if someone really wanted to stay home with there kids it can be done..especially when half the time that 2nd income goes to daycare anyway..
I don't think it's safe to say this is the truth for everyone. I know you weren't tryong to offend anyone, and I'm not offended, it's just that you're generalizing.
Also, kids are really expensive. You can cut back a lot of things, but you need to consider the new expense. Moving to a "least expensive" place isn't a cure all.
But you're right in that where there's a will, there's usually a way and people that do it find ways.
I will (when and if blessed with kids) be home for the first 3 months...then I'll see my baby after work.
But I'm lucky, the baby will stay with family, not in daycare, so that's why I say that with certainty.
I think I'll need work to keep me sane.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:03 AM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
i think thats a personal choice..some might say you can always visit family if u lived somewhere else and didnt need to work 2 jobs...as i said its a very personal choice, of what outweighs pros and cons to each family
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:03 AM |
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MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
i wont be a sahm
unless my husband gets a promotion or changes jobs to something that is equal to or more that we make combined, sahm will not happen
the idean situation would be for me to stay home 2 days a week and daycare the other 3
but i dont think that can wok wither
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:04 AM |
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MegZee
My bunny
Member since 5/06 8777 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
i think thats a personal choice..some might say you can always visit family if u lived somewhere else and didnt need to work 2 jobs...as i said its a very personal choice, of what outweighs pros and cons to each family
i just doint think that "dont live in an expensive area" is a solution. but you are right, its a personal choice.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:05 AM |
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Eva Luna
Be kind...life's hard!
Member since 8/05 4750 total posts
Name:
God, bless & heal my DH, JenG's DH Rob & DebG
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
i think thats a personal choice..some might say you can always visit family if u lived somewhere else and didnt need to work 2 jobs...as i said its a very personal choice, of what outweighs pros and cons to each family
Wouldn't you be miserable in a completely new place without your friends and family for support? Why would anyone do that just for a kid? Wouldn't you then resent the kid?
I think that's very hasty in thought. It's a lot less selfish to work and give the child a family, with grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. than for you to be miserable and home with them.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:06 AM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
i think thats a personal choice..some might say you can always visit family if u lived somewhere else and didnt need to work 2 jobs...as i said its a very personal choice, of what outweighs pros and cons to each family
i just doint think that "dont live in an expensive area" is a solution. but you are right, its a personal choice.
i was just using that as one of many examples... i dont get why some pple would work 2 jobs when that second income goes to daycare most of the time..isnt it kind of pointless?
im asking an actual question--im not sassing anyone lol
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:07 AM |
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LisaI
Momma's Little Beans
Member since 1/06 3923 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
We decided prior to TTC that I would be a SAHM, since I made a little less than DH at the time. If he made less he would be the SAHD. We saved and paid debt off prior to havig our daughter and all has worked out wonderfully. the first year was tough for me to adjust to having a new demanding role and then not having my own money was tough. i've adjusted though and am happy we made this decision. i will go back to work when the children are in school FT.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:07 AM |
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Myrockette
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Member since 5/05 5632 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I've been a SAHM for the most part. I didn't plan on it, I made my decision to quit my job after she was born. I then worked pt after she turned 1.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:08 AM |
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johnsae
Sip.
Member since 3/06 18677 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I will be a full-time SAHM. Having a child is very very important to me and I have never been a "career" person anyway. I can't wait to be a full-time mother, and DH thinks it is very important that I stay home with the kids as well. We are fortunate in that DH's income can support us all.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:08 AM |
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TreAnt427
-
Member since 8/06 8652 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I don't think I want to be a stay at home mom and I don't think we would be able to afford it. I would like to work part time if I can.
Message edited 10/11/2006 9:10:43 AM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:10 AM |
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LisaI
Momma's Little Beans
Member since 1/06 3923 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Eva Luna
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by Meaghan729
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
i completely disagree - $$ is not an excuse. you say dont live in a location where living is overly expensive. well LI is expensive. I could be a SAHM if I moved out of state - but them my child wont grow up near their family - not worth the sacrifice to me.
i think thats a personal choice..some might say you can always visit family if u lived somewhere else and didnt need to work 2 jobs...as i said its a very personal choice, of what outweighs pros and cons to each family
Wouldn't you be miserable in a completely new place without your friends and family for support? Why would anyone do that just for a kid? Wouldn't you then resent the kid?
I think that's very hasty in thought. It's a lot less selfish to work and give the child a family, with grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. than for you to be miserable and home with them.
gotta jump in here:
we decided to move to GA. to have a better lifestyle and raise our children. We didn't nor do we still think it's selfish to raise our children without our family around 24/7. Believe me when I say that our family (all immediate) visits us on a regular babis. I have visitors monthly sometimes on a busy month weekly. we chose this lifestlye to raise our children where we felt was better for them. It was a personal choice and we would never change it. Sure we miss our family, especially when I lost the baby I needed family around, but you know my sister took the first flight out and was there for me as was other family members. It works for us and lauren has everything and then some she will ever need in life. Most of all happy parents that love her unconditionally.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:11 AM |
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unknown1
****
Member since 5/05 2771 total posts
Name:
lisa
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
I only will have children if i can be a sahm or ONLY work PT.. I believe that kids (especially when they r younger) need a parent who is home a majority of the time..
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
there are always some type of sacrifice to be made, in some way if someone really wanted to stay home with there kids it can be done..especially when half the time that 2nd income goes to daycare anyway..
no offense to any1 here this is just my opinion and what i feel would be good for me and one day my family
jmo hope i dont offend any1
eta: sahm until kids become school age, then id go back to work
You have no idea do you ??? Money as an excuse ???? It is a real issue ... you apparently don't have children or any dependents so how are you basing your answer, on your experience?
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:13 AM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Eva Luna
I think I'll need work to keep me sane.
This is exactly the conversation DH and I had. He feels (and so do I) that I will be happier in the long run.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:16 AM |
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2Pisces
Life Coach
Member since 2/06 3337 total posts
Name:
Paige
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
 I consider myself so lucky becuase my mother was a sahm. But I just don't know if it is for me.
We'll see....when the time comes.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:16 AM |
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LisaI
Momma's Little Beans
Member since 1/06 3923 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
I only will have children if i can be a sahm or ONLY work PT.. I believe that kids (especially when they r younger) need a parent who is home a majority of the time..
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
there are always some type of sacrifice to be made, in some way if someone really wanted to stay home with there kids it can be done..especially when half the time that 2nd income goes to daycare anyway..
no offense to any1 here this is just my opinion and what i feel would be good for me and one day my family
jmo hope i dont offend any1
eta: sahm until kids become school age, then id go back to work
nderstand what you are saying here, however it's a choice that some people HAVE to make to work. money is an issue for a lot of people. my girlfriend who has a child and ispregnant with another one HAS to work. she has no choice. she despretly wants to be a SAHM and hates every second of her commute and long hours of travel and working, but again she HAS to work for extra money and benefits that her husband doesn't have from owning his own business. They make tons of sacrafices, but again she needs the money to raise her children and have a roof over their head.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:18 AM |
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~Colleen~
my loves...
Member since 5/05 9129 total posts
Name:
guess
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by johnsae
I will be a full-time SAHM. Having a child is very very important to me and I have never been a "career" person anyway. I can't wait to be a full-time mother, and DH thinks it is very important that I stay home with the kids as well. We are fortunate in that DH's income can support us all.
Same for me. We have based our finances and savings (mortgage, etc) for this.
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| Posted 10/11/06 9:19 AM |
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