Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

This will be our 1st baby and DH and I always talked about me staying home once we started having children. We do not have any family that will be able to help us watch the baby since everyone works full time and we do not want to do day care if we can manage on DH's salary. It's definitely going to be an adjustment w/out my salary and I feel like it's going to be such a huge change for me. I just wanted to hear your thoughts on being stay at home moms and how you feel about the whole thing. Do you feel guilty about not working? I haven't told work yet because I'm hoping when my due date comes nearer I can possibly work out something part time with them or even work from home, but I"m sure they won't allow it, but who knows...As far as they know I will be returning.
Thanks for any thoughts on this.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I have been working for almost 2 yrs now, since DS was born. Now that I am PG with #2, I may or may not go back. We will see when the time comes closer.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I didnt return back to work after I had my son.. I didnt tell my job till the end of my maternity leave and actually even at that point I let them think that I would come back part time.. I knew there track record of trying to get rid of people before maternity leave if they knew they werent coming back.. I miss working but I love being home with my kids and It is hard in the beginning to figure out the budget and all but its worth it.. I also didnt want to do the day care route if I didnt have to and I have no one that could watch my kids..If you can swing being a SAHM then I say go for it..Good luck its a hard decision me and my DH were on the same page about it..

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I've been a SAHM since my DD#3 was born 7 years ago. I planned on returning to work - teaching - this past September, as my little one was at that point in school full-time for the first time. I am glad I did not go back, as volunteering up at her school, etc, has been a blast! I like being close to her teachers, and really knowing what is going on in her school. I worked when my big girls were small, and I realize now how very much I missed out on.

I feel guilty not working, though. I feel bad about myself sometimes, and especially when we need to watch our $$ extra closely. DH is unbelievably supportive, but I still feel like I should be like all the other moms and get out there and work!

That said, my older DD's #1 and 2 are now young teens, and we are soooo close. Everyone complains about kids their age, and I have no complaints. I think being available to them, and for them, without the added pressure of lesson plans, fatigue from work, etc, has made a profound difference. We don't have the biggest house, and we only take one major vacation a year, but having girls who are happy, polite, and with self-esteem is a great reward.

So nope, definitely staying home with this baby, too. Probably not for as long, but I see the difference this sacrifice has made.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

thanks for posting, I feel better about the decision

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

Our plan is for me to stay home, budget allowing, until our youngest goes into school full time.

I had all the same fears and reservations as you, Robin. And let me tell you. Me being on bedrest the past month has definitely made the transition a little easier. I was basically told I had no choice regarding working so we had to just deal with it.

Although I haven't really been out and about spending money since I can't. But we have been adjusting on just having one salary brought in.

Hang in there. I'm convinced being a SAHM, whenever possible and wanted, is the best way.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I'll be going back PT, but only one night a week. I know it's going to be a huge adjustment for me, but this is what we both want. I'm glad I was able to keep some hours at work though becuase it will be good for me to keep my skills up.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

i wa thinking i would go back full time but after being home for 2 months alread I am thinking i might go part time but i will be working

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I was planning on leaving work this fall regardless of being pregnant or not, now with twins on the way there is no way I could leave 3 kids with my mom!!

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I was not planning on returning to work and have stopped working now so I can take the summer off before baby arrives. It is definitely an adjustment being home and really hard not having an income anymore. I was always so proud of my income and to now not have one is hard to get used to. I plan on being home for about 2 years.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

My "origninal" plan was to stay home probably the first year. Now with my babies health issues (congenital heart defect) I will be home indefinitely. We will probably live with my dad indefinitely as well, as he is closer to the hospital where my son requires care.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I work from home and will probably hire a babysitter/nanny to help me for about 4 hours 3-4 days a week so I can get some work done. My DH also works from home so we are lucky. He can pick up slack for me when I have appointments, etc. I carry the insurance and the 401K etc. Hopefully my friend is moving down here soon and her DH nd mine may start a new business together so we'll see what happens with that

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

we have a similar situation - we dont have any family to watch the baby or "freebies" and my friends call it. So I am hoping , if my job will allow to work part time. We will have to pay for child care 3 days a week.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I stay at home during the day and work at night I wouldnt suggest it though , I hate it and If I could I would stay home !! I stayed home for 2 yrs after #1 was born

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I'm totally in limbo....I have no idea what I want to do. I can't imagine leaving a 12 week old with a stranger, yet at the same time I can't imagine not bringing home a salary...I make really good money and I've worked my way up the corporate ladder and am really proud about where I've brought myself...so I'm really torn, I think I'm just going to have to wait it out and see while I'm on maternity leave. We are lucky enough to have the luxury that if I do want to stay at home I can, but it will be with some minor sacrafices

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I am not sure what i am going to do yet. I was thinking about staying home.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

staying home is not an option for me
not sure what we'll do just yet
DH can work nights

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

baby is due in october I am not returning to work until the middle of january and only working pt 2 days a week totaling 8 hrs, I love love my job and would miss it dearly, so for 8 hrs a week I can do both.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

We could never afford for me to stay home so I am returning to work most definitely.

I dont know how some of you girls do it with the economy these days! You are very lucky!

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I am staying home. I actually left my job at the beginning of the year and was looking for a new one when I got pregnant. DH and I decided that I wouldn't get a new job in the meantime and that I'll stay home with the baby. But, I also run a small side business so that definitely brings in extra money.

It is a HUGE adjustment and still feel weird about not bringing in a regular salary and not having somewhere to be every day. At times I feel really guilty, but know this is what is best for our family right now and feel blessed that DH feels the same way. It certainly won't be easy!

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

I plan to return to work, but not sure about staying at my current job.......it's really not family friendly IMO.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

i WISH i could stay home
I'd Love to!!

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?

Message edited 6/14/2008 9:57:12 PM.

Re: Any ladies not returning to work after baby?