Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

My little one is 13 days old today. After he was born, after one ok night with me in the hospital, he needed to be put into the NICU for a few days due to some breathing issues. During that time I tried my best to pump what I could, but my milk hadn't come in yet and the stress of everything left my supply limited. He had to receive formula through the bottle and a pacifier to soothe him in his incubator.

I had planned on not introducing a bottle or pacifier or formula until about 6 weeks but I had no choice in this instance.

I resumed breatfeeding the day I brought him home. I think his latch may have been off because my nipples became extremely sore right away. It got to the point that I literally flinched away in anticipation of pain when he tried to latch onto my breast. I tried really hard to correct his latch and worked through the pain but then yesterday everything came to a breaking point.

He was so fussy all night and all day and no matter how much I fed him, he would show signs of hunger again right away. It was emotionally and physically draining. I started to think perhaps I wasn't producing enough milk for him or he was having a problem getting it from me. I couldn't take it anymore and my husband encourged me to try pumping and give him a bottle. I caved and I did and he took it happily and fell asleep. I continued to pump through the night and breastfeed on my less sore side. This morning at about 5 am i had breastfed and pumped and he was still sucking his hands hungry, I couldn't bear to watch him hungry and give him a pacifier so we gave him about an ounce of formula that the hospital sent us home with. Again, he drank it happily and fell asleep. I have been pumping and feeding him from the bottle ever since, and he has had plenty to drink from me, I haven't had to use formula again.

Needless to say, I am devestated. I never thought breastfeeding would be so difficult. I am left not knowing what to do. Should I attempt to breastfeed again despite the pain it causes me and the fact that he seems to not get enough from me when I feed him directly...or should I become an exclusive pumper? Should I cave in and just give him formula? I've already contacted the doctor and am waiting for his advice as well. Any insights or opinions or tips you ladies could offer me would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you so much, and sorry for the long post, but I just needed to vent a bit. Thanks.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

contact a lactation consultant - my son did not latch well and i ended up in pain - also if your dh can run out and get nipple shields it may help him latch and less pain for you

also get soothies they are great- throw them in your fridge

i used the lactation consultant from the hospital and she was vey helpful and in checking th lactch and fixing minor problems that cause bigger problems

i had to supplement and pump a lot the first 3 weeks - but i pushed through it and i BF my son for a year so don't get discouraged

i was not meeting demand also so ihad my dh get me mother's milk pills from whole foods

good luck and try and relax a little formula is not the end of the world - you can still BF

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

The army of bf girls here will be throwing so much good advice at you very soon. I didn't realize it was going to be so difficult either, but it is, and anyone who's been through it says so.

The best advice I could give you, is get a Lactation Consultant. Ask around in your town, area, who the best ones are. The best ones, come to you, btw. Wish I knew that. I got stuck with a sucky one, and just thought they were all like that.

Also, talk to them about a nipple shield, it was the only thing I didn't try and I wish I did! We had latch issues, and even still at 9 months DS still latches funny on the bottle. I feel like I trained him the wrong way on my breast

BF shouldn't be painful when your doing it right, is what was told to me. Honestly though, I was never comfortable, even if I wasn't in pain.

hang in there

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I am at work so I can't write all that I would like but JUST KEEP PUMPING!

If you keep pumping you can keep trying to correct the latch and your milk will be there

I am 5 months in, I ONLY pump BUT you can definitely become a successful BFer - it takes people MONTHS sometimes.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

First of all take a deep breath and try to relax. The latch could be off or you could be experiencing the normal BF pain that most of us feel for the first couple of weeks. Does it just hurt when he latches on for say 20 seconds or so or are you in pain the entire time you are BF him?

Call your local La Leche group and ask them if they have a lactation consultant that can come and see you.IF you are up to going out they may have a meeting that is close by that you can attend with your little one.

The main question is what do YOU want to do? Its not too late to get him to BF if you get his latch corrected but its also okay if you just want to pump and give him pumped milk too.

Good luck and keep asking questions if you need to and we will try to help.

Oh and of course Congrats on your new bundle of joy

Message edited 1/5/2011 12:43:17 PM.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I know exactly how frustrated you feel bc I went through it too. DS is 4 weeks old now... In the hospital, he latched right away and due to his slight jaundice (sp??), we had to give him 2 bottles of formula a day to flush his system out since my milk hadn't come in yet. My milk came in the day after I got home from the hospital and he just stopped latching completely. My breasts were very full and my nipples changed share which made it hard for him to get a good grip so I started to pump and bottle feed. I had come to terms with exclusively pumping and did it for 2-3 weeks. Just last week I was thinking about it and really want to give it another shot. I didn't want to miss out on the opportunity to BF him. He went on immediately and we have been successfully BF throughout the night. I couldn't believe how quickly it happened. He never forgot how to do it and is doing such a great job! If you are overwhelmed and in pain... take a little break and pump/bottle feed. When you are ready to give it another shot, he will be ready too!!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I think you should keep trying. While breastfeeding is the most natural thing, it DOES NOT come naturally to most women.

It's difficult to get that latch. It's difficult to get used to doing it. It hurts initially.

But if you do want to breastfeed, call a lactation consultant.



Also I want you to know that for me, those first few weeks were the hardest I've ever had as a parent. It will get better. I promise. Hang in there

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I think regardless, it hurts initially, whether the latch is right or not. I was really not pain free until DD was about 6 weeks old! In the beginning my nips were definitely raw and bleeding. I would defintiely keep trying to put him on the breast! It could be that you just needed a little pumping to get you going! Try not to get too frustrated, although easier said than done. Your emotions and hormomes are all over the place right now, so everything seems so major. Totally normal!
I think a lot of it is mind over matter. If you really want to be a successful BFer, you will give it all you've got! So far, you are doing an amazing job! Sticking with it is more than half the battle!!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I agree with PP. Contact a lactation consultant. You will be sore when first breast feeding but it should not be excruciating. You may need a nipple shield to help the baby with the latch and to help him get milk a little more easily.

I had nothing but problems when I first started breast feeding, but I still breast feeding at 12 months. You can do it, and remember, the bottle is not the devil.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Posted by Tilde

I am at work so I can't write all that I would like but JUST KEEP PUMPING!

If you keep pumping you can keep trying to correct the latch and your milk will be there

I am 5 months in, I ONLY pump BUT you can definitely become a successful BFer - it takes people MONTHS sometimes.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Thanks everyone, I agree my hormones are out of whack right now and I'm going to take a step back and relax. I will takle the advice here, to keep pumping and keep trying to get him to latch. If anyone can recommend a lactation consultant, I would really appreciate it. I tried contacting one through my doctor but she hasn't gotten back to me yet.

Thanks again

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Speak to a LC and get a nipple shield ASAP. They are lifesavers. Just pump after as the shield doesn't give maximum stimulation.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Posted by nrthshgrl

I think you should keep trying. While breastfeeding is the most natural thing, it DOES NOT come naturally to most women.

It's difficult to get that latch. It's difficult to get used to doing it. It hurts initially.

But if you do want to breastfeed, call a lactation consultant.



Also I want you to know that for me, those first few weeks were the hardest I've ever had as a parent. It will get better. I promise. Hang in there

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Posted by nrthshgrl

I think you should keep trying. While breastfeeding is the most natural thing, it DOES NOT come naturally to most women.

It's difficult to get that latch. It's difficult to get used to doing it. It hurts initially.

But if you do want to breastfeed, call a lactation consultant.



Also I want you to know that for me, those first few weeks were the hardest I've ever had as a parent. It will get better. I promise. Hang in there

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Where do you live? I got lots of help from the LC at my hospital who runs weekly support groups - free!!!!! You don't need anything to go other than the will to show up! It doesn't matter where you delivered. She's in Huntington. FM me if you want more info. Her meetings are every Wed. from 1:30-3:30. I went every week from when DS was 3 weeks old until almost a year old. You'll get lots of support from her AND from other moms in the group.

I also agree about the nipple shield. It helped my sore nipples heal for the few weeks I used it!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

keep pumping

Call Dr. Rubin - in Mineola - Happy and Healthy Peds. She is not only a pediatrician, and a fantastic one, but also a lactation consultant. She is amazing!!!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I too had latching issues with DS in the beginning and the nipple shield was godsend. Also, as previously mentioned contact a LC and also seek out some support. Check out the LaLeche League website for meetings. I don't know where you are located but the Patchogue group is meeting in 2 weeks and I believe the Ronkonkoma/Medford group is meeting next week. Also, I went to the weekly Breastfeeding support group meetings at St. Charles. They were such a lifesaver and I met some amazing other moms there and the LC really worked with me in the beginning at the meetings. Good luck!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

One thing I wish someone had told me earlier: It is NOT all or nothing. My DS #2 was in the Nicu also and was given some formula while he was in there. I did the best I could with 2 under 2.

In the beginning I was EXTREMELY sore also. I ran to the Dr bc I was convinced I had thrush it was so painful.
Nope, it just hurts. At around 9 weeks, it got better.

I would pump and bottle feed every other feeding. So I was still putting him on me and trying to nurse sometimes. Sometimes I gave him 1/2 BM and 1/2 Formula in the first few weeks.

eta: I also used nipple shields some of the time. The LC in the NICU actually gave them to me.

Once I healed a little I put him to the boob all the time. This is the only thing that really got my supply up for me, IMO.

Do whatever you are comfortable with. If you want to stop, happy mom = happy baby. But if you want to keep going, it will get better, I promise.

Call the hospital or Nicu where your son was and ask them for a LC. I am surprised you didn't meet with one while he was there!

Message edited 1/6/2011 3:22:57 PM.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

I could have written this exact post a couple weeks ago- my ds is 7 weeks and I was in agony- turns out he had thrush- we both took meds, I also started pumping and storing milk as some days I got more and some less

but I agree with all the pp that said call a lactation.. Rachel (divinemrsm) also had 2 come to her house- so you may want to fm her

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Brestfeeding is hard!!! Don't feel bad about the set backs just keep working on it. It took 8 weeks with my first for things to work out, but I never let the set backs stop me. If you continue with determination it will work out. If you think your supply is low try more milk plus, it worked wonders for me!!!! Good luck and don't give up I swear it gets better!!!

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

Breastfeeding if definitely difficult. When my milk came in my breasts looked like melons and DD couldn't latch onto my nipple because it was so flat. Thank goodness for nipple shields. Get them, they will help TREMENDOUSLY. It is going to be a bit painful, and the pain will come and go here and there, but if you are this determined, keep at it!

Find a comfortable position for you and baby. Maybe it's laying down so you don't have to worry about holding him. Take your breast in your hand like a C (right breast right hand left breast left hand) and push slightly on your breast so you'll pull back on your nipple. Do this with your thumb. When he opens his mouth, quickly place your nipple in his mouth. I could only get 50% of my nipple in my DD's mouth, so try your best.

There is nothing wrong with EP either. Do what works for you and your baby. Congratulations and FM if you have any questions!

Message edited 1/6/2011 4:32:36 PM.

Re: Breastfeeding issues...advice, please help

If you can contact a lactation specialist.

DD was in NICU for a week and given formula. I wanted to ebf but my milk wasn't in entirely, which is totally normal and the nurses started formula..ughh!! Anyway, I would totally try and commit an entire weekend to just you and the baby. Do skin on skin as much as you can. Nurse on demand and your supply will increase. Your LO is approaching the 3 wk growth spurt thAts why it probably seems like he's attached to you. It's temporary...try and get Specialist or someone from la leche to help you with your latch. Good luck!