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Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I keep reading all these threads on class mom's asking for X amount (but not specifying what they are buying) for holiday gifts, end-of-year gifts, asking for contributions to different things and parties inside the class room..
..it seems like it can become very political and you can make enemies quickly.....and the PTA moms and dads, and the politics of that.....
I never recall any of this growing up.....I will have to ask my mom tomorrow to verify...I remember the PTA, (and the PTA parents I remember specifically were all major pains and their kids always seemed to get the leads in the plays - not saying it could have been a coincidence, but I remember a lot of angry parents) but it seems class moms are so involved these days.
I find a lot of it to sound like a great deal of BS, but I'm not there yet, so I can't fully judge, KWIM? And when I say BS, I mean all the little conflicts that can occur...
any insight or opinions?
it seems so intimidating!
Message edited 12/12/2010 9:56:36 PM.
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Posted 12/12/10 9:55 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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mommyIam
Member since 7/09 9209 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
honestly, it sounds like something I'd stay very far away from...
I'm also ignorant to what exactly PTA is, my dad came to school and harassed my teachers either into telling him I'm the best or what the hell is wrong with me if I'm not. 
I think I'm that kind of parent 
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| Posted 12/12/10 9:58 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Im a class mom AND in the PTA, PLUS a PTA board member!
AJ is 2
I want my say dang it. And so far I see how they seem to have their minds set on things (prez-viceprez) and don't really ASK for much opinions other than how to implement it. I like to be the voice that asks, can we have alternatives?
I've been the President of the National Association of Insurance Women in NYC. Board member for years before that. I know the drill. I just prefer back seat this go around. Though I'm sure in a few years I'll throw my hat in for Prez.
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:02:40 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:02 PM |
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by Xelindrya
Im a class mom AND in the PTA, PLUS a PTA board member!
AJ is 2
I want my say dang it. And so far I see how they seem to have their minds set on things (prez-viceprez) and don't really ASK for much opinions other than how to implement it. I like to be the voice that asks, can we have alternatives?
I've been the President of the National Association of Insurance Women in NYC. Board member for years before that. I know the drill. I just prefer back seat this go around. Though I'm sure in a few years I'll throw my hat in for Prez.
so is it really just for personal gain/notoriety for the most part? You sound normal and sane and that you actually care..which I am sure may be rare...but is it really like a bunch of sharks?
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:05 PM |
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DBJ808
LIF Adult
Member since 6/09 1039 total posts
Name:
Dana
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I give a lot of credit to the parents who join the PTA (they do a lot of work and really help the school). I also think it is a great way to become more involved in your child's education and be a part of things in the school. Parent participation has really cracked down in the elementary school I taught in. There were very few occasions throughout the year where all parents were invited to class functions. Usually, it would just be the 3 class parents to help out. It is nice to be able to attend class parties when your kids are little if you can... the PTA enabled parents to do so. I would have parents calling me begging to come in and help out but I couldn't allow it because of school policies. I think most parents joined to be more involved for their children. However, there are the *FEW* parents who join and cause drama and don't have anything better going on in their lives so the like to stir things up a little among the parents. It really gives the PTA a bad rep.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:07 PM |
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by DBJ808
I give a lot of credit to the parents who join the PTA (they do a lot of work and really help the school). I also think it is a great way to become more involved in your child's education and be a part of things in the school. Parent participation has really cracked down in the elementary school I taught in. There were very few occasions throughout the year where all parents were invited to class functions. Usually, it would just be the 3 class parents to help out. It is nice to be able to attend class parties when your kids are little if you can... the PTA enabled parents to do so. I would have parents calling me begging to come in and help out but I couldn't allow it because of school policies. I think most parents joined to be more involved for their children. However, there are the *FEW* parents who join and cause drama and don't have anything better going on in their lives so the like to stir things up a little among the parents. It really gives the PTA a bad rep.
ahhh....I see. I didn't know that most parents couldn't attend each and every function...or school policies... hmm..that makes for a different perspective then. Then I'd want to join..or at least entertain the idea.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:10 PM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I remember my mom being upset if she thought the amount was too high, but that was only because she was concerned she wouldn't be able to afford it, not because she thought the amount wasn't fair.
I don't know how I'll feel when I come to that point. Hopefully we won't be in the poorhouse and I'll be able to afford to not care
ETA: There was no political nonsense that I know of growing up, but the PTA was the place to get the best gossip!
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:11:35 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:10 PM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
i am going to be knee deep in it!
i don't want to hold office or anything, but def up in the mix
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:14 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
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Christine
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
DD#1 is in 4th Grade. I have been class mom almost every year and I am a member of the PTA. To be honest, it is what you make it. I have made some great friends up at school. I have run things, such as Author Visit and The school fundraiser. I have dedicated a BOATLOAD of time to make "OUR" children's school experience a great one. I volunteer for everything. Every teacher, the principal, the girls in the office, security etc know me by name. I like it that way. My kid feels lucky to have me involved in the ways that I am. She is well aware that not every mom can do it.
I have not experienced a lot of drama. Most of the mom's that I have encountered are grateful for the time that I and the other mom's that can, put in. Women are women and there will always be a certain amount of catty-ness when you have a large group of them in one place. I always like to keep in mind that all we do is for the kids, period. I stay out of whatever drama, I see coming.
ETA: growing up, my mom was the Prez of the PTA
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:16:36 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:15 PM |
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by headoverheels
I remember my mom being upset if she thought the amount was too high, but that was only because she was concerned she wouldn't be able to afford it, not because she thought the amount wasn't fair.
I don't know how I'll feel when I come to that point. Hopefully we won't be in the poorhouse and I'll be able to afford to not care
ETA: There was no political nonsense that I know of growing up, but the PTA was the place to get the best gossip!
yes! this my mom's concern, too, if I recall correctly (PTA dues? or something to that effect?) I think she was a member for just a bit. You're right about the gossip though..... one of my childhood best friends... her mom was in the PTA......we called it Parents Talking Alot (a lot)!
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:17:17 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:16 PM |
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LSP2005
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Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
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L
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I remember the PTA being political back when I was a kid. I am a class mom. I also volunteer for a lot of school activities. My feeling is that I like to communicate with the parents in my son's class. If I don't want to be in the dark about something, I figure that they don't want to be either, so I really try to communicate the essentials. I raised the exact point that you posted - why are we collecting $, where is the money going, how is it being spent, what do we plan to do in the future, how can we accomplish these goals, etc. I share that info with the parent's in DSs class.
ETS: I am friends with people on both sides of the aisle so to speak and try to placate everyone. Some want to spend more, others want to spend less, it is hard to find a happy medium but I feel if I am involved then I have my voice heard.
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:21:36 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:18 PM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by ChrisDee
DD#1 is in 4th Grade. I have been class mom almost every year and I am a member of the PTA. To be honest, it is what you make it. I have made some great friends up at school. I have run things, such as Author Visit and The school fundraiser. I have dedicated a BOATLOAD of time to make "OUR" children's school experience a great one. I volunteer for everything. Every teacher, the principal, the girls in the office, security etc know me by name. I like it that way. My kid feels lucky to have me involved in the ways that I am. She is well aware that not every mom can do it.
My mom was very involved like you. I hope to one day do the same for my boys.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:19 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by speakthetruth
Posted by headoverheels
I remember my mom being upset if she thought the amount was too high, but that was only because she was concerned she wouldn't be able to afford it, not because she thought the amount wasn't fair.
I don't know how I'll feel when I come to that point. Hopefully we won't be in the poorhouse and I'll be able to afford to not care
ETA: There was no political nonsense that I know of growing up, but the PTA was the place to get the best gossip!
yes! this my mom's concern, too, if I recall correctly (PTA dues? or something to that effect?) I think she was a member for just a bit. You're right about the gossip though..... one of my childhood best friends... her mom was in the PTA......we called it Parents Talking Alot (a lot)!
It costs $7 for the year to join our PTA
Honestly, I don't ever play into the drama on here but I will tell you this. Parents talking Alot is a bit offensive. I give ALOT of time and energy to make not only MY kids school experience great, but YOUR kid too.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:20 PM |
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BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!
Member since 11/08 8346 total posts
Name:
Kristie
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I've been on both sides of the class mom thing, I've been the class mom and been the parent feeling bullied by the class mom "clique".
When I was class mom I didn't specify a $$ amount- it was contribute what you can and I wrote what the gift we were planning on getting was. Needless to say I got next to nothing as far as $$ went since the same 5 kids parents always contributed so the end of the year gift i got for the teacher was only from those 5 kids since at that point i was soooo disguested with all of the politics and everything that I did everything i could to make sure the kids had an awesome time and didn't really care what anyone else thought.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:20 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by LSP2005
I remember the PTA being political back when I was a kid. I am a class mom. I also volunteer for a lot of school activities. My feeling is that I like to communicate with the parents in my son's class. If I don't want to be in the dark about something, I figure that they don't want to be either, so I really try to communicate the essentials. I raised the exact point that you posted - why are we collecting $, where is the money going, how is it being spent, what do we plan to do in the future, how can we accomplish these goals, etc. I share that info with the parent's in DSs class.
As a class mom, I always send home a very specific list of where the money is going. How many parties or functions there will be and how much is allocated for each. If we are buying a gift for the teacher, I always tell in advance what it is that we are buying. I also like to let everyone know that sending in money is NOT mandatory and if you do not or can not, NOBODY will know about it.
ETA: I have kicked in more money than I care to remember to make sure that the kids had what they needed for parties, crafts etc. when other parents could not or would not chip in.
Message edited 12/12/2010 10:26:32 PM.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:24 PM |
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by ChrisDee
It costs $7 for the year to join our PTA
Honestly, I don't ever play into the drama on here but I will tell you this. Parents talking Alot is a bit offensive. I give ALOT of time and energy to make not only MY kids school experience great, but YOUR kid too.
didn't mean to offend you or anyone else - I just remember always hearing the dirt on other classmates and their mothers from my friend's mother (in grade school).
I know the well-meaning parents who join the PTA and other class activities give it their all and have a lot of enjoyment out of doing it, and I don't doubt for 2 seconds that it's a great deal of work.
I just have heard the opposite at times, and wanted to hear opinions of those who are on either side, or if they are at that point in their child's life or not.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:28 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by speakthetruth
Posted by ChrisDee
It costs $7 for the year to join our PTA
Honestly, I don't ever play into the drama on here but I will tell you this. Parents talking Alot is a bit offensive. I give ALOT of time and energy to make not only MY kids school experience great, but YOUR kid too.
didn't mean to offend you or anyone else - I just remember always hearing the dirt on other classmates and their mothers from my friend's mother (in grade school).
I know the well-meaning parents who join the PTA and other class activities give it their all and have a lot of enjoyment out of doing it, and I don't doubt for 2 seconds that it's a great deal of work.
I just have heard the opposite at times, and wanted to hear opinions of those who are on either side, or if they are at that point in their child's life or not.
Don't get me wrong, there is drama. This is a bunch of women we are speaking about. So CLEARLY there is drama. I am just saying, you can avoid it and I do. I do what I do for the kids, I stick with the drama free moms and refuse to get sucked into the B.S. KWIM? This is how I am in my personal life always. I am not the type of person who has drama in my life in any aspect because I avoid it like the plague.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:33 PM |
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carissa1643
I LOVE my sons! :)
Member since 5/09 5283 total posts
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Carissa
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I definitely plan on being in the PTA and class mom and chaperones for things. I cant wait. I want to be as involved as possible, not the president or anything, just around and aware and included.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:35 PM |
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by ChrisDee
Don't get me wrong, there is drama. This is a bunch of women we are speaking about. So CLEARLY there is drama. I am just saying, you can avoid it and I do. I do what I do for the kids, I stick with the drama free moms and refuse to get sucked into the B.S. KWIM? This is how I am in my personal life always. I am not the type of person who has drama in my life in any aspect because I avoid it like the plague.
It's certainly good to know that you're able to have a positive experience in it, while avoiding the drama. That is encouraging! I guess I will have to see when I get there. I hope it would be positive and inviting.
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| Posted 12/12/10 10:35 PM |
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2ForMeIn2011
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Member since 7/10 996 total posts
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I want no part in it but I love to hear about what goes on behind the closed doors 
So I've become good friends with the mom in DD's class who is the self proclaimed class mother
I think I'm still in awe that there is drama even in pre-school 
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| Posted 12/12/10 11:29 PM |
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Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
I call them the PTA Mafia at DS school. I pay my dues every year but learned very early on it is super cliquey.
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| Posted 12/12/10 11:33 PM |
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Faithx2
All good things in 2016!!
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
My mom was VERY involved in the PTA and I hope to be the same. Drama is everywhere in life that wouldn't keep me away one bit.
Message edited 12/13/2010 6:48:28 AM.
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| Posted 12/13/10 6:46 AM |
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Diana1215
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Diana
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by carissa1643
I definitely plan on being in the PTA and class mom and chaperones for things. I cant wait. I want to be as involved as possible, not the president or anything, just around and aware and included.
same here!
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| Posted 12/13/10 7:52 AM |
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beautyq115
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
Posted by Janice
i am going to be knee deep in it!
i don't want to hold office or anything, but def up in the mix
Me too! I always wanted my mom to be more involved so I really want to be involved in PTA and their classes.
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| Posted 12/13/10 7:54 AM |
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HillandRon
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Name:
Hillary
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Re: Can we talk about what kind of mom you will be when your kid is in school? re: PTA/class mom drama?
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| Posted 12/13/10 7:57 AM |
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