Elective C-Section

My sister is pregnant with her 1st and due in April. She is insisting upon an elective c-section. She is in the medical field and her father-in law is an OBGYN and claims its fine to have one (I also say he never gave birth or had a section so who is he to say). I keep telling her she should really reconsider and it will be worse than she is thinking. She said that she talked to a few of her friends that has sections and they said it wasn't bad. I am worried that she doesn't know how much recovery time she will need. I also think these women that said it isn't bad, probably also had help from family members after the baby was born. My sis lives out of state and her and her DH have no family to help after the baby is there. I know people will be going to visit but that will only be for short trips. I think her DH is also only taking a week or 2 off. I dont know why in the world she is choosing to do this when she will be having to care for the baby mostly on her own and also plans to nurse. Please help me try to change her mind. Is there anything I can tell her? Maybe Im wrong and it will be fine.

Re: Elective C-Section

What does her doctor say? I can't imagine he/she would be willing to perform a procedure like that if she doesn't need one. If she does need one that's obviously a different story.

Elective C-Section

you can tell her all you want, in the end its her decision. maybe she will rethink this whole thing on her own.
coming from someone who had an awful c section experience, if i had the option, i wouldn't do one. you can barely stand up and get out of bed, let alone care for a baby yourself. even picking up a little baby hurts! i hope she reconsiders!

Elective C-Section

She said her Dr is fine with it. I think because she is a PA they are a little more giving than they would be with someone who is not in the medical field. She definitely does not need one. I also told her I heard that insurance companies will not cover elective CS, not sure if that is true.

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I'm in the medical field and I wanted to avoid a c section at all cost, unless it was necessary or the safety of the baby. Why would you want unnecessary surgery? I just don't understand that line of thinking.

That said, I am friends with a female doctor who has two children, the first vaginal, the second a section. She told me several times to "just have a section!" (if I had the option). In her opinion, it was better to have one neat incision as opposed to having your vagina torn apart. I totally disagree but that is her opinion.

I had a 3rd degree tear and would still prefer that to surgery, unless of course the baby was at risk. I say all of this as a woman who never had a c section. They certainly have their use but to choose one with no good reason is insane to me. This is major surgery (with all it's risks involved) for no reason vs your body doing what it was made to do.

Message edited 11/20/2013 11:37:20 AM.

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It's her decision, so I think you can lend your opinion, but it's ultimately up to her. And if her dr is ok with it, then I don't know why you're so worried.

I had a c-section because DS was breach. DH was only home with me for 5 days and I didn't have any other help. I was fine. Yes, it's major surgery, but after the first 48 hours it's really not bad. There's pain, but nothing so unbearable that I couldn't care for DS. I was up and out of bed 12 hours after my surgery. So if she chooses to go ahead with the c-section, I do tend to think she will be fine at home.

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I am all for c section, I've had 2 myself. I'm happy this is the way it happened for me. If she stays In the hospital for the full time (I think it's 4 days) she will be much better by the time she gets home. My DH took a few days off to help, if her DH can take a few days she should be fine. It is just a tiny incision, just seems much easier.

Message edited 11/20/2013 11:36:31 AM.

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Many many MANY doctors give elective C sections.
I did it for my second child. I ened up w/ a C section w/ the first after forever in labor ......had no interest in a VBAC.

I don't really think it's your place to insist your sister deliver her baby a certain way. It's between her, her doctor and her husband.
And if her FIL is an OBGYN, I'm sure he has a considerable amount of experience delivering babies, the fact that he hasn't been pregnant is irrelvenat -

ETA - neither of my c sections were bad at all. I was totally fine after a few days, and as long as I took the painkillers could easily move around, shower, take care of myself and the baby .....etc.

Message edited 11/20/2013 11:39:40 AM.

Re: Elective C-Section

what's the reason for choosing it?

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I don't think there is anything you can tell her that will change her mind if she's made it up (and it sounds like she has).

Is it possible that she has another issue that she's not sharing with you & she has to have a C?

Some people have easy recoveries from C-sections; others have lousy ones from a V-birth. I don't know why someone - outside of a medical issue - would chose surgery for childbirth.

As for the FIL, it reminds me of when my podiatrist told me that foot surgery recovery wasn't that bad. I went in afterwards & asked if he ever had the surgery. He said no. I told him never tell patients it's not that bad again. It is complete BS. I had 2 babies without an epidural & that doesn't even begin to compare to the pain.

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I didn't read any of the other comments yet, but as someone who was hell bent on a natural birth and had a c-section, it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought. My recovery was great, I was up and walking around better than some girls who had vaginal deliveries around me, I successfully breastfed DD (starting in recovery and up until she turned 2), and by the time I got home, I was able to do everything I wanted to do (except drive, I waited til the ok from the Dr.)
I never took anything stronger than Motrin either. I know a few other people w/ similar c-section experiences as me. My mom had 3 awesome c-sections with me and my siblings.

While I agree that it seems silly that she doesn't even want to try for a vaginal birth, it's her decision...just like women who choose not to even try to breast feed. It's her body, there are risks either way, and many people wind up w/ c-sections anyway. I say let her decide how she wants to bring her baby into the world.

Give her all the info so she is making an informed decision, but I wouldnt try to change her mind...what if she listens to you, labors for 24 hours and still winds up w/ a c-section?

Message edited 11/20/2013 11:54:08 AM.

Elective C-Section

There's this fear stigma with c/s and I know that some people have been through hell with theirs but mine was great.

Mine was elective for medical reasons and my recovery was fine. I was up and walking within 24 hours. My DH only took a few days off from work. I didn't need any other people around to help me when I got home. Thankfully my bedroom is on the first floor of my house. I would say the only difficulty I had was getting in and out of bed because my bed is high off the ground.

The recovery varies from person to person but I wouldn't put the fear of god in her because that is what she is choosing.

Message edited 11/20/2013 11:55:37 AM.

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I have a friend who had 3 elective c-sections...she had good recoveries and didn't want to ever go into labor.

Honestly, if this is what she wants and she found a doctor to do it for her...it's up to her and her doctor.

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I had a c-section with my twins and less then 12 hours later I was up and walking around, sore yes, but totally bearable and wouldn't hesitate if I needed to do it again. Everyone is different and has different tolerance to pain, in the end it is her decision to make.

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I said it before on here and I'll say it again....why does it matter how a child gets into this world? As long as they are safe and healthy I don't know why it worries others ....either way vaginal or csection there can be many complications yes one is a surgery but the fact of the matter is that that doesn't make it any more risky ..,,,every pregnancy and delivery has its risks and honestly the way a baby comes into the world is up to her her dh and her obgyn and if all are on board then it shouldn't be an issue.....I had three sections first one was an emergency and the other two were elected bc I don't believe in the risks of vbacs for myself ....all three I was up the same day just a couple of hrs after the surgery and I stayed all 4nights and by the time I got home all three times I was fine to do practically every thing (.not driving ) my dh took off a wk but that was it and honestly I didn't need much help at all...and all I took was Motrin from my last day in the hospital on

Message edited 11/20/2013 12:56:55 PM.

Re: Elective C-Section

Posted by TTCbaby

I had a c-section with my twins and less then 12 hours later I was up and walking around, sore yes, but totally bearable and wouldn't hesitate if I needed to do it again. Everyone is different and has different tolerance to pain, in the end it is her decision to make.

Message edited 11/20/2013 12:18:03 PM.

Elective C-Section

I would have had an elective one if I was given a choice. I ended up with one anyway. I had zero desire to have a vaginal delivery.

As for recovery. I was fine. Needed no help nor had any. My dh went back to work. If you have to do it even through pain you just do it.

IMO I would not say anything to her it's her decision.

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I had two elective C-sections and they were both fine. I was able to manage my pain with otc meds and was taking care of the baby from day 1. If she chooses to do it, odds are she will be fine.

Elective C-Section

The first 3 days were awful for me, but after that I was fine and continued to ebf until he was 13 month sold. The section did not effect my nursing. Every recovery is different. Some women do great and it was nothing, and others have horrible recoveries. I found working in L&D that the women that got up and moved as soon as they could did best. The ones that laid in bed demanding pain meds for every little thing had bad recoveries. Yes it does hurt and is uncomfortable but moving helps the most. I would let it go. She may change her mind and at this point it may not even matter. If you go into a big long speech about trying a natural birth and the baby is breech she may turn from you. Just be supportive and myob unless she asks.

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I had a C and my recovery was fine.

I wish I had a vag birth but still, it's not your place, your business, or your body.

Re: Elective C-Section