Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

am I being petty??

this girl has a baby.
we all have to "stork" her.
I find it to be a pita...but whatever.

I see her at a playdate with new baby,
I say oh, congrats! i have tomorrow night, when is a good time to bring over dinner?

She says in a very dry tone "someone will be there all day"

So I make dinner, bring it over, her husband is there. He says thanks...she is out getting pics taken of baby.

no email, no facebook message.

I see her yesterday...zero mention. I did not do this to be carried out on her shouders...but to not say thanks? I want to like her and get over it, but it is bugging the hell out of me.

tia!

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Ok, I don't know what "stork" her means....cooking food for her since she just had a baby?

So, you brought food over to her house - she doesn't email? text? Fb you to say thank you? She sees you and doesn't say thank you?

If that is the case, OMG, I would be livid. People are so rude.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I would give her maybe one more chance (when you see her face to face) to thank you, otherwise yes I'd be pizzed

and I've never heard of "storking" someone Sounds fun though

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I also think you should say to her "Oh, so you did get the food that I brought over to you right?" or somethinig to that effect

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I'd like a little appreciation to so I agree with you. Gosh, wish I had been a little "storked". No one brought us food. With my second child I thought no one knew we had a baby other than my parents and my sitter at the time. You'd think someone would have thought about my other daughter. I'd be so greatful if someone did for me what you did for that mom.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

You're not being petty at all--totally rude the way she couldn't even muster a thank-you.

The moms group wanted to know if they could make meals for me when DS comes, and I actually felt bad! It's not that the other moms have nothing to do! But they are insisting that they want to help out and you can be SURE that I'm going to be eternally grateful for that. I can't believe she couldn't even manage a thank you.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

No, not at all. I get the having a new baby is tough but not so tough that you can't have common decency. You have a baby and you cooked a meal for her. I'd have a hard time letting that go. I'd probably go so far as to say. How did you like my meal? I never heard from you after I left it with your DH. Hopefully it was helpful.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

i totally agree.....

give her maybe a week or two to see if maybe she corrects herself.... or maybe she thought her husbands thank you was aenough- but she's suppose to be your friend so she should be able to send a text, facebook post whatever.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

A little appreciation is in order but given the new baby maybe she's feeling overwhelmed & something else is going on?

We had meals set up when a friend's husband died- it went for almost 3 months. That phone was not picked up once to call & thank us. I know people were feeling miffed about it. Later I found out she didn't know the schedule & who was dropping off food AND they had so much food in the fridge, she was feeling overhwelmed.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

No, I don't think you are being petty at all!

Is there a chance her DH didn't remember your name and couldn't tell her YOU dropped it off?

She could just be really overwhelmed.

Instead of asking her if she got your food, ask her how the photoshoot went. You can say her DH mentioned it when you dropped the food off.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Yes, definitely rude.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

With all the time and opportunities that passed...it would bother me. How hard is a simple thank you?

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I have never heard of "stork" before - but if you cooked her a meal to help her family out and it went without any sort of thank you - I find that incredible rude. It only takes a few minutes to pick up the phone or shoot and email and say thank you at the very least. I would have LOVED to have someone bring food for us when I had either girl - I had to cook all our meals. That is a HUGE help to a family with a newborn. Sounds like she just expects everyone to do things for her with no appreciation.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I don't think you are being petty-I think she could manage a "thank you" when she saw you.

Maybe her husband didn't tell her so she didn't realize?

Also, for the comment about "someone is always home"-could that mean that she has a lot of people visiting at her house and is overwhelmed?

In either case I would mention it-"hey, about that lasagna I dropped off-it will keep until Monday, otherwise freeze it and then you can keep of for 3 months"

Message edited 5/14/2010 10:03:11 AM.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

That fact that she saw you after you gave the food and said nothing is really proving there is no excuse.

She apparently feels entitled.

I understand that she could have been overwhelmed, tired..... NOT to go on FB, text, call or write a TK card. But when she saw you, there was no excuse not yo thank you at that point.

VERY RUDE!!!!!!

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Totally rude. I would say something the next time you see her along the lines of " I hope your family liked the meal I dropped over" and if she says "yeah" and thats it then 86 her as she does not deserve any more of your time much less your home cooked meals. Send them to me instead and I will worship the ground you walk on

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

thanks!

the schedule is posted on our website...so she could view it at anytime.

also, before i left my house...with dinner and getting my 2 kids in the car to look for her home, i wanted to make sure someone was there...called her cell and left a message. so she must have gotten message also.

thanks!
i think it is incredibly strange. i would never expect a call, but you sat next to me for 1.5 hours in someone's yard.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

I would be annoyed too, and I know I would make a passive agressive comment. But that's just me. I'm kind to a fault, but it is NOT good to be on my bad side.

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

ITA, if she saw you, she could have thanked you then if she didn't get a chance before or it slipped her mind. I'd give her that leeway, having a new baby can be very overwhelming. But to not say anything at all face to face? Downright rude and strange IMO>

Re: Having a hard time letting this go...a mom in my moms group.

Janice.....there's no excuse to not turn to your face and say thank you. Rude and inconsiderate. That would be the last time I did anything for that woman. I don't think you're being petty at all