Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Kelly, remember what you told me not too long ago? I have that bad infection and I may have to choose between getting better and BFing soon. Trust me... I know! BUT you told me I had to take care of myself, right? I am torn that if my infection will not got away, I will HAVE TO take care of it and take a medication that would not allow me to BF. Actually my body is starting to show me signs that I am not getting better. I am bracing myself for it and I am NOT ready but we have to do what we have to do. My mom told me that DS will get over being on formula. He will be fine. On the other hand, it will harder and more dangerous for me to not treat what is going on.

In the end, our little treasures need us to be healthy so we are there for them.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I can completely understand. I always said I would "try" breastfeeding, never know how important it would become to me. The thought of stopping kills me (and we have had our definite share of BFing problems) but I just keep thinking that if I needed to, I know that I have given her a tremendous gift of health already by doing so. You have made it SO far despite what you went through. You went back in the hospital right after having him and you still did it! Most people would have given up. I know exactly the heart-wrenching feeling you are having but you need to take care of your health and deep down you know that. Michael needs you, your DH needs you and when chemo is done and if and when you decide to have another baby, that baby will need you.

Stay strong Kelly, you can do this!

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I agree with everyone else. You NEED to take care of yourself so that you will be strong & healthy for your little (big ) guy and whatever happens down the line. Don't look at it as choosing between helping your DS and your potential future children. Taking care of YOU will ensure that DS is taken care of the best way possible, even if that means no more BF (I BF, so I know how hard the thought of having to stop is).



ETA: With the way your guy is growing, he'll be on steak in no time anyway

Message edited 11/8/2007 8:07:16 AM.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Get healthy for your DS, DH and yourself!

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Message edited 11/8/2007 8:14:39 AM.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I agree with everyone else. you need to take care of you first. But, what about pumping as much as possible before you go in for the chemo, so you can keep giving him some BM? I'm not sure how soon they would start you on chemo, but if you could pump as much as possible, then you would have some. But you have to take care of YOU first. Good luck.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

ITA

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I understand how hard this is for you and so with much compassion I would say have the chemo. I commend you for wanting to breast feed your son but more importantly...you need to be there for him. You have a big role in that little boys lfe and he needs you to do everything in your power to be there for him. Do this for the both of you. You've given him a great start already with the BM you have provided...take pride in that.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Posted by nymommy2be

I totally understand what you are feeling because I BF and I know how special it is. But, you need to put your health first. Your baby needs a healthy mama more than anything else.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I do understand why you are devistated as I also BF my dd in the beginning...having said that, you need to be around for your beautiful son. I would choose the chemo

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Oh Kelly...first of all lots of and I give you and your husband so much credit for having to go through this all. I totally understand your dilemma as I am BF myself...BUT its time to take care of yourself...you have already given Michael that healthy start by BF him up to this point...why don't you continue up until the point when you need to start the treatment...please its time to take care of yourself...

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Posted by nymommy2be

I totally understand what you are feeling because I BF and I know how special it is. But, you need to put your health first. Your baby needs a healthy mama more than anything else.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Don't have any advice, just wanted to give some

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I gave up BF my DS when he was 5 1/2 months old- it had taken us SO long to get into a nice BF rhythm but I had to stop and was heartbroken about it. I needed to go on medication. I resisted for so long but looking back I am happy that I stopped. I needed to get better- and as I got better, I became a better mommy- I was able to care for him like the person I really am- not the person I was when I was sick.

Its so hard to stop nursing- its one of the most special things you can ever do.

But, you literally have to stop to save your life, so you can be there for your son- there really is no other choice.

I am sorry you have to go through this- you and your family are in my prayers.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I have much sympathy for you! It is hard to stop breastfeeding, but I think you realize you need to take care of yourself. Formula is not a bad thing at all, in fact after 4 mos Dr's reccomend a little so babies will get the iron they need. You are a wonderful mother. Look at the big picture. If you don't take care of that tumor you could be looking at a lot worse than not having another child or BFing. Take care of you! Much love!!

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I wanted to offer hugs becuase I can imagine how hard this all is. I have BF both my girls and understand how special it is, but it is far more important for your son to have a healthy mom! When you stop do not allow your self to feel any guilt, you have done a great job and are doing the best you can for your family!

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I didn't BF, but I can understand.

Lots of for you and your family.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

You are in my thoughts and prayers, Kelly!!!!! No matter what decision you make, always know that your husband, son and your friends will be right behind you supporting you!!!!!!

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

No advice, just these

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Posted by nymommy2be

I totally understand what you are feeling because I BF and I know how special it is. But, you need to put your health first. Your baby needs a healthy mama more than anything else.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

I can certainly relate. I too, always said I would "try" breastfeeding, but since my baby has been born, it has become so important to me. The thought of stopping is so sad to me. I had to stop for a week when my son was 3 weeks old (I had an infection) and I was not sure if he would latch back on. I was a complete mess. I return to work next week and I am not sure what will happen.

I don't post much, but I have read your posts about your difficulties after your DS was born. You have already done so much for him. You went back into the hospital after he was born and still managed to successfully breastfeed. That would have been enough for many people to stop. I know it is easy for me to say "choose your health." But your son needs a healthy mommy even more than he needs breastmilk. There are so many more ways you can develop a close bond with your little guy besides just breastfeeding. Just from reading your posts, I can tell you are a great mommy who has sacrificed a lot for your DS. He is very lucky to have you and if you have another little one, that child will be lucky to have you too.

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Re: I knew this day would come, but I'm still devastated (LONG)

Oh kel..I'm so so sorry to hear this I know about the breastfeeding..i'm getting Gavin on Formula for just daycare and I"M SO UPSET..but I would choose chemo in a heart beat I think because your little man needs his momma to be healthy..and you did get to BF for at least a little while..he got some of you!!!! FM me if you want to talk!!!