Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I will be on top of everything that goes on, on our computer. They have great software for that and I'm sure it will only get better.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I don't think I'll need to snoop because DD's will be allowed to do nothing
Thankfully DH's the computer guru so while we will allow them to use the computer they will have limited access to the internet and we will know what websites they are accessing or trying to access. I don't see myself snooping unless they give me a reason to be concerned.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

heck yes we will be snooping. heck, i didn't even have a tv in my room until i was in college! i had a laptop my senior year of high school, but no internet on it.

luckily my dh is quite the computer nerd lol. we've already discussed having major parental controls, and being able to see what ds is doing. (that is, if he gives us reason to snoop.) that being said, he's only 3 right now, so we will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I will allow them privacy to a reasonable extent. Anything on the internet is fair game, if everyone else can know, I can too.

They won't have their own computers for a very long time.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I don't like to think I'll be snooping through their drawers and closets -

And by the time my kids are old enough for the internet and cell phones and such I'm sure the technology will be 100x more advanced. So who knows what kind of flaming hoops I'll have to jumpt through to keep tabs on them - but I will try

I don't want to raise kids that aren't 'allowed' to do anything - b/c it goes one of tow ways -
1. they totally rebel and do anything and everything behind your back
2. they are so unbelievably sheltered that they miss out on a lot of experiences and end up being timid and afrain of their own shadow .........!!

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I don't know... I'm really torn on this.

Right now I monitor their online activities closely. Neither of them are allowed to have any profiles for online gaming or social networking - but they are still young. I think that when the day comes that they do have a FB page or whatever, I will insist on being 'friends' with them.

Ahhh.. I don't know! I guess I'll fret until and after the time comes!

Message edited 10/8/2010 11:40:29 AM.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

My DS is nearly 1 and I cannot imagine what is going to be out there when he "old enough" for me to have to deal with this. My mom was/is a snoop. It was something that I hated and rebelled about. Will this stop me from snooping? No way but it will make me snoop in a "different" way then my mom who was very "in your face" about it...nothing was private...diaries, mail, phone calls, etc. I think some sort of "sense of privacy" is important for a child, however I am a snooper by nature (or nuture) but will keep it to myself.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

my daughter just had a seminar in school yesterday about the internet, how to be safe and use it properly. She said when the speaker asked how many had a facebook, aim, or myspace, 2/3 of the 6th grade stood up!! my daughter can only use the computer for homework, nothing else. 100 percent of the time I google something myself, at least one option is an adult website. When she gets older, I will allow it..prolly 15. I see her friends on facebook now, and the pictures they stick up with their shirts hanging off there shoulder is just trouble IMO. I need my daughter to grow up a little more slowly.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

The world is what it is...we can't hide our children from everything and we need to accept the times we are in. I think the key is developing a respectful, open and honest relationship with your kids. The good, the bad, the ugly...I want my kids to come to me with whatever questions or problems they may have. I am hoping that I can teach them right from wrong and they use that to make the right decisions. Unless I think my child is going to be a danger to himself or someone else I probably won't snoop.

Realistically, in 10 yrs. I wouldnt doubt that desktop computer, maybe even laptops, probably will be going "extinct" and everything will be done on cell phones or smaller, handheld computers. Our kids will most likely be doing all of their school work on some type of computer so obviously we can't monitor everything they do 24/7


ETA: I also think they key is keeping your kids involved in sports and school acitivites (clubs, plays, musics, etc). They more they are involved in outside activities the less they are sitting home on the computer or running around on the streets with their friends.

Message edited 10/8/2010 12:09:54 PM.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I love the internet for me... I hate it for my kids.

I see the conversations my young SILs have on FB.. I went onto one of their formspring accounts once and nearly had a stroke. And my MIL has been raising kids since the 60s... she's sooo behind the times wrt technology.

So no computers in their rooms. No tvs in their rooms either (I don't have one in mine - it's a family rule). I'll snoop as much as I need to make me feel comfortable. This cyber bullying scares me...

I found out last night that my 13 year old niece was ARRESTED for cyber bullying. I told my DH I was glad to hear it.. not that she was arrested, but that it's being taken very seriously. Who knows what this world will be like when my DD is 13!

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

To me, snooping implies that it is behind their back. That won't be the case--they will know that I have access to everything. I will probably allow a computer in their room, but the computer will be monitored. it is a different time. i wont monitor phone conversations or have the phones tapped (i know someone whose parents did that), but I will have phone records of every number they call and text--and i better know each one of those numbers. they can keep a journal that is private for their thoughts--i think everyone should be entitled to that.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

My mom is the queen of snooping, lol! In fact...I wouldnt be surprised if she is snooping on me right now! (Hi mom!)

I would like to think that I will not have to snoop on my children. I certainly don't plan on it, but I guess I can never say never. If it got to the point where I was really concerned for DS's wellbeing then I can see doing it to protect them if talking to them isn't working.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

My mom always said "under my roof you follow my rules" i will enforce the same thing. Ds can have a comp in hi room my dh is an engineer its doubtful to think he wont be on a comp early. I will however have all pw and login info and have parental controls setup. My house my rules. Deal or move out. I always say i dont care if he wants a piercing or a tattoo or wants to dye his hair red white and blue. As long as he is a good person he can do all of that. Im not raising a brat now, nor will i raise a little sh!tty teenager Not going to fly.

Re: Let's discuss privacy......for our children.

I am going to snoop!
I will monitor them the best I can.

No TV, No Cell Phones until they can pay for them.

No Computer in room until, who knows when!