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Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.

Message edited 1/17/2008 9:44:37 PM.

Posted 1/17/08 9:40 PM
 
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InShock
life is good

Member since 10/06

9258 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by smdl

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.



I appreciate your response. I am kind of surprised by how "pro-CIO" this board is. (I am not 100% set in my feelings, but my gut just tells me CIO is wrong for my family)

Posted 1/17/08 10:05 PM
 

groovypeg
:)

Member since 5/05

2423 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

CIO worked for us. but hey, maybe thats why she turned into a "biter" LOLChat Icon

Posted 1/17/08 10:09 PM
 

groovypeg
:)

Member since 5/05

2423 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?



Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..



can you point out this research. i am genuinely interested, no flames here.

Posted 1/17/08 10:10 PM
 

smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by groovypeg



Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..



can you point out this research. i am genuinely interested, no flames here.



I will be happy too. Chat Icon

Work by:

- Clary, 1986
- Shaver and Hazan, 1987
- Jones, Sandy "crying babies, sleepness nights"
- Dr. Sears: "the fussy baby, how to bring out the best in your high need child"
- A. Murray "infant crying as an Elicitor of parental behavior"
- S. Crockenberg "Infant irritability, mother responsiveness, and social support influences in the security of infant mother attachment"

I have a LOT more reference.

I will be happy to provide it to people who want more info.

Message edited 1/17/2008 10:27:27 PM.

Posted 1/17/08 10:12 PM
 

JTK
my 4 boys!

Member since 6/06

7396 total posts

Name:
Kristi

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by smdl

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.




i also work in the pediatric field and just wanted to point out that you may ( not to be argumentative just to point out a point) has a misconception of CIO.. i have done the CIO method with all three of my kids and have seen it done with many kids.. to make an impact on a child's psychie you would have to leave them crying it out for weeks maybe months!!!!!!!! CIO generally works in 3-4 days! it doesn't leave a lasting impression imo.
i can assure you that my children do not have issues with attachment or committment. they all know and have always known that i am there for them no matter what. i realize that its not for everyone and i totally respect your opinion but i don't want anyone to get the impression that our CIO children are neglected or deprived in any way of our affection and committment

Posted 1/17/08 10:20 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

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Janice

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by smdl

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

QUOTE]

I don't think you will be flamed. Those are your beliefs, you have done the research and came to a conclusion that you are happy with.

Posted 1/17/08 10:20 PM
 

Moehick
Ready for the sun!

Member since 5/05

30339 total posts

Name:
Properly perfect™

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

I kinda look at it like this....your not in my house at night putting my kid to sleep and I am not in yours, so whatever Works for YOUChat Icon

Posted 1/17/08 10:22 PM
 

BaroqueMama
Chase is one!

Member since 5/05

27530 total posts

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me

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by JTK

Posted by smdl

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.




i also work in the pediatric field and just wanted to point out that you may ( not to be argumentative just to point out a point) has a misconception of CIO.. i have done the CIO method with all three of my kids and have seen it done with many kids.. to make an impact on a child's psychie you would have to leave them crying it out for weeks maybe months!!!!!!!! CIO generally works in 3-4 days! it doesn't leave a lasting impression imo.
i can assure you that my children do not have issues with attachment or committment. they all know and have always known that i am there for them no matter what. i realize that its not for everyone and i totally respect your opinion but i don't want anyone to get the impression that our CIO children are neglected or deprived in any way of our affection and committment




Very well said.
I think that there's a huge misconception about babies CIO. I don't know many people who let their babies cry every night for weeks and months, but it seems that's what the perception of CIO is. Like I stated before, Ava cried for three nights, no longer than 45 minutes the first night and way less the next two nights, then she didn't cry anymore.
We all do what we think is right as parents, and I completely understand people not wanting their child to CIO, but I think that if you are not familiar with the process of CIO, you should know that you don't just plunk your kid down plunk your kid down and let them cry every night for weeks on end.

Posted 1/17/08 10:26 PM
 

smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by JTK

Posted by smdl

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.




i also work in the pediatric field and just wanted to point out that you may ( not to be argumentative just to point out a point) has a misconception of CIO.. i have done the CIO method with all three of my kids and have seen it done with many kids.. to make an impact on a child's psychie you would have to leave them crying it out for weeks maybe months!!!!!!!! CIO generally works in 3-4 days! it doesn't leave a lasting impression imo.
i can assure you that my children do not have issues with attachment or committment. they all know and have always known that i am there for them no matter what. i realize that its not for everyone and i totally respect your opinion but i don't want anyone to get the impression that our CIO children are neglected or deprived in any way of our affection and committment



I was pointing my beliefs and my support work. The OP asked WHY and I justify my reasons against it.

Every child will respond differently to CIO. The length that YOU used may also not be the same for someone else. So saying that it took only 3-4 days was only for your case. Not trying to be argumentative either. Just wanted to pointed out that it was your experience with it.

I am sure every child is not "traumatized" for life by CIO.

I personally don't see the point for it.

Message edited 1/17/2008 10:33:40 PM.

Posted 1/17/08 10:32 PM
 

Aga
hello baby Albert

Member since 9/05

7750 total posts

Name:
Aga

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

I just wanted to add, I do it my own way because I am the one that knows my child the best and I know what works what doesnt... what I did was let him cry a few minutes (and I know he is not really crying, he is just whining), then I went in and soothed him, calmed him down and back in the crib (I know this is not typical for CIO)... this way ds knows I am there for him but I am reenforcing that it is time for bed... as I stated before, I know there is nothing wrong with him cause as soon as he sees me he calms down and smiles, little bugger... anyways, I did that for 3 nights in a row and tonight he fell asleep with no problems at all...

Posted 1/17/08 10:54 PM
 

dm24angel
Happiness

Member since 5/05

34581 total posts

Name:
Donna

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by smdl

This is completely against my beliefs.

I teach infant massage and bonding between mom/dad/caregiver and babies. Most of the research supporting my work is from psychologists.

There is a lot of research on the CIO, origin, as well as making babies "tough" and not "spoiling" them.

In the end, I agree with some researchers that babies are affected later in life by being "ignored" while crying. At a young age, babies are not "spoiled". They cry for a reason. Crying is their only way of communication.

So by ignoring their cry, we are teaching them to deal with it. That we are NOT there for them when they need us.

I will be flamed I am sure. But those are my beliefs.

Research have shown that babies left to cry have repercussions later in life psychologicaly. Issues with commitment, attachment to others, etc..

So, when DS cries. I go see him. I talk to him and comfort him.

DS does not cry to sleep. I don't want him to go to sleep thinking I am not here for him. I want him to go to sleep calmy. There is no need for me to see my almost 7 months old baby crying himself to sleep wondering why I am not here for him. I want him to grow up knowing that his parents are here for him and will support him.

Yes, it's more work.



Wont flame you at all, your beliefs are yours and valid and correct for you.

But yes I have seen research showing negative effects based on CIO..

BUT

I have seen just as much evidence that it doesnt cause issues.

There are no valid studies on it.

The studies showing damage, of course typically come from biased attachment parenting type medical professionals

and the studies showing it doesnt harm in any way are given by a seperate group of parenting style professionals.

as with anything else, I think we as parents get to make our decisions and we do the best we know how ..

Dont think theres a right or wrong here, wanted to say that Chat Icon

Posted 1/17/08 11:02 PM
 

Dragonfly75
I love Hypnobabies

Member since 3/06

2333 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by dm24angel


But yes I have seen research showing negative effects based on CIO..

BUT

I have seen just as much evidence that it doesnt cause issues.

There are no valid studies on it.

The studies showing damage, of course typically come from biased attachment parenting type medical professionals

and the studies showing it doesnt harm in any way are given by a seperate group of parenting style professionals.




That's my understanding -- there are no long-term studies that definitively show CIO is negative, but there are no longterm studies that determine it is safe and OK with no long-lasting repercussions either.

So you go with your gut. If you believe, like I do, that it's just wrong to ignore your baby don't do it. No matter who (including, or I should say especially your doctor) tells you it's OK.

I think some of the PP made points about the differnce between an 8th month old who "gets it" and cries for a couple of minutes for only 3 nights and people trying to use this methold on young infants -- leaving them to cry for 20, 30, 40 minutes. IMO, it is unnatural and unexusable to leave a young infant crying for that long and it will effect the type of bond you have with them.

Posted 1/18/08 6:57 AM
 

EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06

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*

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

It's not about it being "easier" or "less work" for me, it's about having children that grow up healthy and happy, and know how to go to sleep on their own.

I don't want DD as a 3 year old to not know what bedtime means and to fight me every single night. I've been there with my son (and know many with the same problem), and will NOT go there again with my daughter. I let her cry for a couple of days, probably not more than 30 minutes each time, and now she doesn't fight her sleep, she just goes down without a fuss when it's bed time.

I love my kids, but I don't think it's healthy for them to be toddlers and still need me to rock them to sleep or for them to have to fall asleep on me. Maybe I've seen one too many episodes of Super Nanny though Chat Icon

Posted 1/18/08 10:03 AM
 

Bxgell2
Perfection

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16438 total posts

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Beth

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Summerrluvv

It's not about it being "easier" or "less work" for me, it's about having children that grow up healthy and happy, and know how to go to sleep on their own.

I don't want DD as a 3 year old to not know what bedtime means and to fight me every single night. I've been there with my son (and know many with the same problem), and will NOT go there again with my daughter. I let her cry for a couple of days, probably not more than 30 minutes each time, and now she doesn't fight her sleep, she just goes down without a fuss when it's bed time.

I love my kids, but I don't think it's healthy for them to be toddlers and still need me to rock them to sleep or for them to have to fall asleep on me. Maybe I've seen one too many episodes of Super Nanny though Chat Icon



I agree completely.

I think it's a false presumption that parents who employ CIO are doing it for an easy way out.

For us, it's a philosophy. Personally, I think it is very important that my children learn self-soothing methods, and gain the skills to put themselves to sleep. I understand there are a variety of theories out there on ways in which you can encourage your child to learn to sleep on their own, but again, it comes down to your child's particular temperment. I employed SO many different techniques to help my daughter learn to soothe herself and fall asleep without needing so many crutches, like rocking, shushing, etc, but none of them worked.

For us, CIO was the only method that worked the most effectively.

Posted 1/18/08 10:09 AM
 

alexlynn7
Big brother to be!

Member since 9/06

6314 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Dragonfly75

Posted by dm24angel


But yes I have seen research showing negative effects based on CIO..

BUT

I have seen just as much evidence that it doesnt cause issues.

There are no valid studies on it.

The studies showing damage, of course typically come from biased attachment parenting type medical professionals

and the studies showing it doesnt harm in any way are given by a seperate group of parenting style professionals.




That's my understanding -- there are no long-term studies that definitively show CIO is negative, but there are no longterm studies that determine it is safe and OK with no long-lasting repercussions either.

So you go with your gut. If you believe, like I do, that it's just wrong to ignore your baby don't do it. No matter who (including, or I should say especially your doctor) tells you it's OK.

I think some of the PP made points about the differnce between an 8th month old who "gets it" and cries for a couple of minutes for only 3 nights and people trying to use this methold on young infants -- leaving them to cry for 20, 30, 40 minutes. IMO, it is unnatural and unexusable to leave a young infant crying for that long and it will effect the type of bond you have with them.



totally agree with this. studies about CIO need to be taken with a HUGE grain of salt - there are tons of inherent validity problems with them.

so i agree, you take the studies for what they're worth and then you go with your gut and do what you believe is right for you and your child.

but i personally believe that the intelligence of young infants - their ability to "get it" - is hugely underestimated. and i also believe that healthy sleep habits need to be taught to some extent. we are all born with the natural instinct to sleep, but how we do it is shaped by our environment.

so i started teaching my baby to sleep early on, at 10 weeks, by putting him to sleep in his crib sleepy but awake (after cuddling him for a good while). when he protested, i would let him cry for a few minutes and then go into his room and soothe him but not pick him up. this way he would learn to trust that i would come in soothe him, but he would also learn that crying wasn't going to get him out of the crib.

it didn't take long for him to "get it" - a few days at the most. and now he goes to sleep beautifully and wakes up smiling.

if anything, letting jonah CIO a little bit has strengthened our bond because there are no battles surrounding sleep in my house. i'm happy and he's happy, so it's a win-win situation for us.

Posted 1/18/08 10:30 AM
 

Dragonfly75
I love Hypnobabies

Member since 3/06

2333 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by alexlynn7



so i started teaching my baby to sleep early on, at 10 weeks, by putting him to sleep in his crib sleepy but awake (after cuddling him for a good while). when he protested, i would let him cry for a few minutes and then go into his room and soothe him but not pick him up. this way he would learn to trust that i would come in soothe him, but he would also learn that crying wasn't going to get him out of the crib.




I don't think there is anything wrong with what you did -- you responded to your infant and you had one of those wonderful babies who can go down drowsy, but not asleep who can get to sleep with back rubbing, etc. (too bad, they're not all like that). My concern is with people who leave 10 week olds crying for long (I'm talking well over 5 minutes) periods and don't attend to them and then say they're "teaching them healty sleep habits" by ignoring them.

Posted 1/18/08 12:57 PM
 

alexlynn7
Big brother to be!

Member since 9/06

6314 total posts

Name:

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Dragonfly75

Posted by alexlynn7



so i started teaching my baby to sleep early on, at 10 weeks, by putting him to sleep in his crib sleepy but awake (after cuddling him for a good while). when he protested, i would let him cry for a few minutes and then go into his room and soothe him but not pick him up. this way he would learn to trust that i would come in soothe him, but he would also learn that crying wasn't going to get him out of the crib.




My concern is with people who leave 10 week olds crying for long (I'm talking well over 5 minutes) periods and don't attend to them and then say they're "teaching them healty sleep habits" by ignoring them.



totally agree - i think that ignoring your child altogether is setting the whole family up for lots of frustration and bad communication. like most other things, i think CIO can and should be done in moderation and always within the context of your particular child.

Chat Icon

Posted 1/18/08 1:25 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

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Stephanie

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Dragonfly75
My concern is with people who leave 10 week olds crying for long (I'm talking well over 5 minutes) periods and don't attend to them and then say they're "teaching them healty sleep habits" by ignoring them.



I agree!

But that is something different and is not the true "Cry It Out" method. In my post earlier, I said that many people don't read the books, do the research and learn the reasoning behind or the true method. They just leave their kid to cry. That is not CIO. There is a method behind it.

Posted 1/18/08 1:44 PM
 

EmmaNick
*

Member since 12/06

16001 total posts

Name:
*

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Dragonfly75

Posted by alexlynn7



so i started teaching my baby to sleep early on, at 10 weeks, by putting him to sleep in his crib sleepy but awake (after cuddling him for a good while). when he protested, i would let him cry for a few minutes and then go into his room and soothe him but not pick him up. this way he would learn to trust that i would come in soothe him, but he would also learn that crying wasn't going to get him out of the crib.




My concern is with people who leave 10 week olds crying for long (I'm talking well over 5 minutes) periods and don't attend to them and then say they're "teaching them healty sleep habits" by ignoring them.




I'm sure there ARE people like that, but I have yet to see someone on this board that does this (or at least talked about it).

Posted 1/18/08 4:00 PM
 

Shelly
She's 7!!!

Member since 8/05

14624 total posts

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Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by Bxgell2

Posted by Summerrluvv

It's not about it being "easier" or "less work" for me, it's about having children that grow up healthy and happy, and know how to go to sleep on their own.

I don't want DD as a 3 year old to not know what bedtime means and to fight me every single night. I've been there with my son (and know many with the same problem), and will NOT go there again with my daughter. I let her cry for a couple of days, probably not more than 30 minutes each time, and now she doesn't fight her sleep, she just goes down without a fuss when it's bed time.

I love my kids, but I don't think it's healthy for them to be toddlers and still need me to rock them to sleep or for them to have to fall asleep on me. Maybe I've seen one too many episodes of Super Nanny though Chat Icon



I agree completely.

I think it's a false presumption that parents who employ CIO are doing it for an easy way out.

For us, it's a philosophy. Personally, I think it is very important that my children learn self-soothing methods, and gain the skills to put themselves to sleep. I understand there are a variety of theories out there on ways in which you can encourage your child to learn to sleep on their own, but again, it comes down to your child's particular temperment. I employed SO many different techniques to help my daughter learn to soothe herself and fall asleep without needing so many crutches, like rocking, shushing, etc, but none of them worked.

For us, CIO was the only method that worked the most effectively.



ITA.

Whoever has done CIO knows it not easy. in fact, its painful and emotional at first. I remember crying as DD CIO at first. It is so hard.

But now, DD is 21 months and goes to bed without a hitch. She goes down and sometimes wimpers for a minute, and then is asleep.


Posted 1/18/08 4:02 PM
 

smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

I was not looking for drama when I posted my answer. Yet, I got quoted quite a few times.

I feel people want to put down my reasons for not wanted to do CIO.

I answered to the OP who wanted to know WHY some moms do it or don't. So I gave MY reasons. I don't have to justify to anyone else why I feel a certain way about CIO.

I have also not quoted anyone else and dicredited their reasons.

The "questioned" research I mentioned is indeed very well respected in the World of Human Behavior and Attachment. It's not a bunch of basement doctors who woke up one day and decided to write a book about CIO. The research I mentioned is about attachment, bonding, etc....

I am VERY well informed what CIO is. I am NOT mislead or confused. I personally find the comment rather insulting that because someone is not for CIO that they MUST be confused about what it is.

Posted 1/18/08 7:45 PM
 

dm24angel
Happiness

Member since 5/05

34581 total posts

Name:
Donna

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by smdl

I was not looking for drama when I posted my answer. Yet, I got quoted quite a few times.

I feel people want to put down my reasons for not wanted to do CIO.

I answered to the OP who wanted to know WHY some moms do it or don't. So I gave MY reasons. I don't have to justify to anyone else why I feel a certain way about CIO.

I have also not quoted anyone else and dicredited their reasons.

The "questioned" research I mentioned is indeed very well respected in the World of Human Behavior and Attachment. It's not a bunch of basement doctors who woke up one day and decided to write a book about CIO. The research I mentioned is about attachment, bonding, etc....

I am VERY well informed what CIO is. I am NOT mislead or confused. I personally find the comment rather insulting that because someone is not for CIO that they MUST be confused about what it is.



I think your beign defensive. I was one who quoted you yet have nothing bad to say about your choices, I was just pointing out that the research you show is valid, but the research against it is just as valid and people agree.

I dont see anyoine saying anything bad against your choices what so ever.

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Posted 1/18/08 9:04 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Out of curiosity, why are some moms for CIO and others not?

Posted by dm24angel

I dont see anyoine saying anything bad against your choices what so ever.

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I agree! I don't see anyone bashing you or going against what you said.

This thread is pointless anyway because we are all set in what we are going to do vs. not do anyway. So I really don't get the point. Chat Icon

Posted 1/18/08 10:20 PM
 
Pages: 1 2 [3]
 

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