POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Just curious what people's thoughts/practices are, especially in this economic climate.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I think it depends upon if we are going to the wedding or not. I have a standard not going to wedding gift (it is less than what we give if we are going). If we were not going, then we would give the standard not going to a wedding gift.
I think I would give less than what I normally give if we were going, but more than my not going gift.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I have never been to a destination wedding, so I can't speak from experience. But....

We briefly considered a destination wedding. We hoped that our loved ones would come and celebrate with us and we would have completely understood if *that* was their gift to us because of how much they were going to spend just to get there.

However, I don't think I would go to a destination wedding for just anyone. Its expensive and its kind of like a "working vacation", from what I understand them to be like. It would be for someone who I was very close to and meant a lot to me - and in that case I would be giving a larger than usual gift to them anyway. I think I would try to give as much as I could swing considering the costs I would already incur just to go.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

we gave a little less...but that's only b/c I was bullied by all of DH's friends to give less since they were. I wanted to give what we normally would have given - and should have.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

my wedding was here and i attended a friend's destination wedding....i gave them the same amount they gave us (and so did our other friends who were in the same position as us)

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Personally I would give a much smaller gift if I go to a destination wedding, or if I have to travel internationally for a wedding. And for my own wedding, I did not expect a gift for people who travelled long distances to come to celebrate with us. It was a gift enough that they travelled the distance for us to be married. When I have travelled back to the states for friends weddings, I have only given a token gift (maybe some local Wedgewood pottery or something) I think spending the money to travel is gift enough.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

yes. The only time I may give a different amount is if I do not attend.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I went to a destination wedding last year. We threw a shower for the bride (at the destination) so my gift was something from her registry. The bride also traveled internationally to come to my wedding and she also gave a gift.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I think it would depend on how close I was to the person. If it was family or someone I was really close to, I would probably give the same amount I would have if it was local.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

We had a destination wedding and got the same amount in gifts we would have gotten here. Therefore, if I were to be invited to one, I would feel obligated to give the same amount.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

we've been to 2 weddings where we had to travel (Las Vegas and NC), and we're going to another one out in CA this summer.
we usually give them the same amount that we would give here, maybe a TINY bit less. the way i look at it- we don't have to go-we choose to. its an excuse for a long weekend away. so we're getting something out of it too. For the wedding in CA this summer, we're turning that into our summer vacation this year- we just happen to have a wedding to go to while we're out there. so i look at it more as us paying to go on a vacation/getaway, rather than paying to go to a wedding...

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

We had a DW in Ireland, and over 40 people came. Some gave big gifts, some gave small gifts, and some gave no gifts! We were grateful that they shared our day with us so we were very appreciative of anything else they may have given us.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I think of a destination wedding as somewhere that everyone, including the bride and groom, need to travel to. Not a wedding in someone's home state/country that I have to travel to. In the first situation, we have been to one in Jamaica and were told our "presence was presence enough." and gave nothing. They did then have a small reception in NY and we gave what we would normally give. I will be going to Jamaica next month and the bride said the same- she does not expect gifts other then us being there. Since I'm in the BP, I am contributing $200 to host her shower and will give a nice gift.
If DH and I had to travel to someone else's home state for a wedding, we would give a regular gift, or maybe slightly less- depends how much the traveling expenses were.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I think I would give a lot less, bc Money was already spent on travelling. but I have a rule to decline destination weddings unless it was my own sister getting married.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I would give the same amount. I am choosing to pay the money for traveling expenses by going so in my opinion I wouldn't lessen the amount I would give on a gift.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

If the destination wedding were for my sister, I don't care what I would spend to get there and I would give her a large gift.

For anyone else, even close friends, I would give less. Money is money is money. Even if I choose to go, I am going to spend on airfare/car/hotel. That could be a lot, and then give a large gift? I think that is asking too much.

We didn't expect anything from the folks that traveled far to our wedding. Their presence was our gift.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I said "other" because I always limit my gift to what I can afford. So, in that sense the gift would be the same whether it was a local wedding or I had to travel - but I didn't really think that was what you meant by the question, so I checked other.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

Any destination weddings I have gone to I have stayed longer & made into a vacation. In that case, I give what I normally would give.

If I was just going for that purpose and returning right home, I would probably give a little less.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I went to a destination wedding last year, and I gave the same gift as I would give if the wedding was in NY.
Yes, we had expenses for hotel and airfare, but the wedding became a vacation for us for 10 days. We didn't have to give such a generous gift, but we felt that the bride should get the same gift that we gave to her sister three years prior.
I also want to add that DH and I are close friends with the bride's parents, and we jokingly refer to their children as our siblings.
If it were another close friend with a destination wedding, then I would also give my usual wedding gift.
If the wedding was for a couple that we are not very close with, I doubt that DH and I would attend. We would send a gift, something nice off the registry or a crystal vase.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

We always give less for destination weddings. Yes it's a "vacation" but I wouldn't otherwise have gone on them (or to these locations) had it not been for the weddings.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

If I went I would give the standard. However, we would have to be pretty close to the people to go.

Re: POLL: Do you give the same monetary amount as a gift if it's a destination wedding?

I think that all depends how close you are with the person.

People think that your travel expense is the wedding gift. But I would give a little wedding gift as well.