Unannounced guests

How does everyone feel about people stopping by your house or apt without calling first?

IMO I find this very rude. MIL just stops by unannounced to see DD. Can't she just call 1st? I mean last week she just shows up and I'm resting on the couch after just putting DD down. She just fell asleep and I wanted to close my eyes for a bit and DH was in the bedroom napping. Not to mention I had no bra on!

I told DH she should call first and he got angry with me and said thats how it is in his family to get used to it. I totally disagree! What if we were DTD?

Today I was on a walk with DD and DH calls me and asks how far I was bc his mom stopped by again! OH WELL! Thats why I say call first!

I understand she wants to see DD but would it be such a big deal to call and see if we were busy first? Am I wrong for thinking this way? Bc DH seems to think I am.

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it would bother me too. even if it were my own parents. they ALWAYS call. even if my mom or dad is out and about locally, like at church around the corner, they will always call or text first to see if i'm awake/decent/available/in a good mood/etc.

it would also bother my DH, his brother did this once and he was annoyed. it was like 8:30pm too.

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Totally rude.

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Message edited 11/25/2011 9:03:35 AM.

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How do I bring this up to DH without fighting again? I want ti nip this in the bud now!

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Yeah its annoying for sure. One time my dad calls me, I had literally just stepped out of the shower dripping wet, and he says "hi, im outside your door"... WH HEEEEEk?

I told him I was in the shower, sorry. He turned around and went home (20 min) drive. Now could I have dried up real quick and opened the door? Sure! but I didnt so he gets the message!! NOw he never comes without calling.

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I don't answer the door unless I'm expecting someone. I don't care if my lights are on. It's rude.

When I was about 3 years old, my grandma (my mother's MIL) showed up unannounced one morning after taking a couple of buses to get to our apartment. (My grandma was one of those "Marie Barone" types) Door bell rings, my mom looks out the window and sees it's her, and my mom answers the door while putting my jacket on me and says "oh, I'm really sorry you made the trek, but I'm bringing Kris over to someone's house to play...next time you should really call" and sent her BACK HOME. Needless to say, she never showed up unannounced again. And the whole thing was a lie...but it taught her a lesson!

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Re: Unannounced guests

Posted by PearlJamChick

I don't answer the door unless I'm expecting someone. I don't care if my lights are on. It's rude.

When I was about 3 years old, my grandma (my mother's MIL) showed up unannounced one morning after taking a couple of buses to get to our apartment. (My grandma was one of those "Marie Barone" types) Door bell rings, my mom looks out the window and sees it's her, and my mom answers the door while putting my jacket on me and says "oh, I'm really sorry you made the trek, but I'm bringing Kris over to someone's house to play...next time you should really call" and sent her BACK HOME. Needless to say, she never showed up unannounced again. And the whole thing was a lie...but it taught her a lesson!

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I don't like when people just drop by... I like to have time to shower/clean up a bit before people come. If my parents dropped by, I wouldn't care because they know I'm a mess...but they never would. They always call.

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HATE IT. Luckily it almost never happens.

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If Im not knowing younare coming and just show up. Dont be surprised if you stand out side all night. I have done it before, and would do it again.

I find dropping in, to be rude and tacky. Huge pet peeve.

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Next time don't answer the door. Also, leave a note on the door saying please don't knock baby is sleeping.

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SO RUDE.

If you can't convince DH to stand up for then I would also lie, and make myself less available when she drops by. Make sure I'm always almost out the door if possible or something else. Eventually, it'll be such a hassle for her that she'll get the hint.

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Thanks everyone. I knew I wasn't crazy! DH ended up telling her to call first next time

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The only person that really drops by occasionally unannounced is my brother and I really don't mind. I don't care how I look or how dirty my house is with him. Probably anyone else I would mind though!

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I think it is rude. I made a point the first time we got our home before anyone made any unannounced visits to to say if you are coming over please call first. It is not that I don't want visitors it is just that I want to be prepared for them first. Thankfully everyone understands and has agreed with that line of thinking. I don't just stop by peoples homes without calling or having an agreed time to meet. I would hope someone else would give me the same courtesy.

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So rude!!!!!

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i am terrified about who will show up at my door, so everyone knows to call me first to let me know they are coming over!

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I agree, very rude and unnecessary. This is the only reason I'm glad that I live 35 minutes from the nearest relative. No one ever stops by unannounced. Unfortunately, that's because no one stops by, period.

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For me it depends on who it is. Also I don't have any kids. My mom has only "stopped by" twice in the last 3 yrs since I moved out, but it made my day both times. Once it was a Sunday morning, DH and I were still in pj's and she said she was just going to leave something for us on the front step, but we invited her in and had coffee together. Honestly, anyone in my own family is welcome anyday anytime. However, I do feel differenly about my in-laws. I want at least 24 hrs notice before they come over. LOL!

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I am the only person on LIF that doesn't mind a pop-in, I guess.

However, I don't have people in my life that make a habit of it or are super annoying. I really don't care how clean my house is if someone does pop in. If you want the house to be clean, wait for an invitation.

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So rude!!! We had this same problem, especially after DS was born. IL's would drop by almost every day the first 2 weeks without calling, so I made DH call them and tell them to stop coming over. They would stay for HOURS on end!!! I was trying to BF, I needed to sleep, and they wanted me to entertain them!!! We live in a 2-family house with SIL, so they come over to see her and still think it's fine to "drop in" on me. Drives me crazy!!! I think I will start locking my adjoining door so they can't just walk in when they feel like it. They have some nerve!!!

ETA: Sorry for venting on your thread, it's a touch subject

Message edited 5/20/2011 11:14:11 PM.