Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Message edited 11/1/2010 11:03:08 PM.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

I am sorry you are going through so much turmoil. There is one person on here that thought she did not have a viable pregnancy and was scheduled for a D&C, and it turns out that it is viable and she is carrying twins. Sometimes hope is all we have, so I know it is easier said than done but try to stay positive and you never know.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

I am not and did not go through IF so I cannot talk from that standpoint, however I am actually thrilled that you did not have your d&c and that they did a sono before you had it. I first saw this post yesterday and I saw that you had a beta of 700 and nothing to be found on the sono. Well my first beta was in the 900s and there was nothing on the sono, 1 week later I had a beta of 12,000 and a big empty sac. 2 weeks after that I had a baby and a heartbeat on the sono. I wanted to post this yesterday but I did not want to give you hope if you already had the d&c. I hope and pray everything works out for you with this pregnancy

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

My aunt had something similar happen. Her doctors said she her PG was ectopic and as she says "at the last minute it poped out of the tube" and my cousin was born healthy.
I will keep you in my prayers. This has been such an emotional time for you, I hope you stay strong.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

i have had 2 ectopics now so i can only speak from my experience and research i have done. both times, my numbers started out low for a while and then jumped very quickly like it was a viable pregnancy. the big indicator in my case was my progesterone dropped. with a beta that high, they might be able to see something on the sono in the tube if it's ectopic. there is something called a pseudosac that develops in the uterus if it's ectopic. maybe they are waiting to see if they can see something in the tube or if the sac in the uterus starts to develop? have you had any bleeding or pain? once my numbers got high the first time, i had bleeding and pain.

miracles happen every day. i am praying for one for you

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

I am sorry this is happening to you...

Similar situation happened to me with my first pregnancy.....low beta, doubling, not doubling, not seeing anything, predicting ectopic, then beta doubling again, seeing sac in the uterus (empty) and then bleeding and natural miscarriage at 7 weeks.....

You are almost 6 weeks and by this time your beta should be in the high thousands and you should see a yolk and a fetal pole and after 6 weeks a heartbeat....your beta is only 1,700 and you had a 6 day transfer so that is why Dr B thinks this will not be a viable pregnancy...

but....miracles do happen and I know someone that also had a similar situation (almost identical to yours) and guess what? by her 6 1/2 weeks sono she saw a healthy heartbeat and is now 32 weeks pregnant...!!!!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

I will say a prayer for you! What a crazy story at any rate!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Thank you ladies for sharing your stories. Against the advice of my DH and Dr. B i do have hope. I just can'thelp it. Although I know my chances are VERY slim at best at this point, miracles DO happen.

I am back at work today, trying to keep busy and will go back to Dr. P tomorrow morning. I will keep you all posted.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

I am so very sorry that you are going through this, please try to remain positive. I will keep you in my prayers. Sending you tons of your way.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Talk about a roller coaster!!! What the hey is going on!!! I hope you get some answers tomorrow AM!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

First of all...I am soooo sorry that you are going through this. Second...if you have not done so already, I highly recommend that you take a look at the following site...many cases of misdiagnosed miscarriages:

http://www.misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com/

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

im so sorry that you and dh are going thru this. i pray that it works out. give it to god and have faith!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Thinking of you and sending you prayers during this time. I hope it all works out. You are an inspiration to me that you keep going.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Good luck today! I'm praying for a little miracle for you!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Good Luck!!!!

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

a million

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Just thinking about you and wondering how things are going....

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Thinking of you and

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Thinking about you today.

Re: You can't make this $hit up...UPDATE 11/1/10

Wishing you lots of luck. Dr. P is my OB and I love him- he's awesome

UPDATE 11/4/10

Posted by maybemommy10

So I have decided to start an IVF journal, here, it will be a great outlet for me and because past journals posted here have helped me so much. If I can help one woman be a little less scared, a little more informed, feel a little bit less alone then at least something positive comes out of this journey, win or lose.

Our background:
Me: Mid 30’s
Him: Mid 30’s
DX: Unexplained, All our numbers are great, pft.
Tried au natural for close to 2 years.
Doctor: Dr. B ! / American Fertility
6 Medicated- 4 IUIs (2 Injectibles) Cycles all BFN!!

ANDDDDD so it begins !!

IVF June 2010:
6/12/10: CD 2 Blood/Sono -Start BCP's (3 weeks)
6/23/10: Mock transfer and sonohyst (ouchie) but all ok!
7/3/10: Last BCP, BW and Sono. BCP didn't work, still have eggs, wait and see (so po'd)
7/10/10: BW and Sono..follie is 23mm! Unfreakinbelievable, i dont even make those kind of eggs on drugs. Take HCG shot and prays it drops!

7/14/10: BW and Sono. Follie from $ell no longer there! Start Lupron tonight.
7/24/10: Lupron Bleed! FINALLY! I nearly cried i was so relieved. Made an apt. with Dr. B for Monday. Please let the rest of this cycle go according to plan
7/26/10: Thank You Lord! I was given the green light to start IVF, finally. I still will take lupron (stepdown to 5ml) for a few days, then add in ganerilex, then start the stims next week.
5ml Lupron- am
Baby asprin
Prenatal

Anddddd world's longest IVF cycle continues...sigh
7/30/10: No More LUPRON! Thank God, that stuff made me EVIL....
25ml ganirelix- am
Baby Asprin
Prenatal

"I don’t want a mediocre child" This is what I told DH last night. I said after ALL of this I think I deserve the best of the best, no C minus child for me. I am determined to give birth to the first female president.


8/2/10: After 15 days of BC, 16 days of Lupron, and 4 days of Ganirelix, i am finally ready to start stims tonight!! When Linda called to tell me to start, I replied REALLY??!!? As if she had just asked me to fly to the moon. I really expected to be delayed again.

Luveris .5
Lovenox 40mg
Follistim Pen 300 units
Ganirelix 25 units

8/6/10: B/W and sono 3 on the right and 4 on the left that measured 15m+, then 2 or 3 on each side 5-6mm and then a few tiny ones floating around. Stop Lovenox. Start cipro Sunday. See Dr. B Monday (Day 7 of stim)

8/9: B/W and sono, around 20 follies , none mature yet, but all growing evenly and Dr. B says thats what counts.
Drop down to 225 units of follistim. Go back Wed.
8/11/10: B/W and sono, follies are maturing nicely, Dr. B said we are doing ER Friday !!!! YAY! Excited, nervous, scared and wanna throw up all at the same time.

8/13/10: ER... 12 follies, 9 mature, 7 fertilized using ICSI

8/16/10: Day 3 transfer
Transferring 3 8 cell grade 1 and 2
Fertilization Report 4, 8 cell grade A
1, 10 cell grade 1.5
and 2, 6 cell grade 1

8/16/10: Transfer cxled due to OHSS, taking meds to have swelling go down. I was devastated. The Doctor said there was way too much fluid surrounding my ovaries, this is yet another setback, im trying to stay positive but its getting increasingly difficult. I really just want this over now.

I really appreciate all of the FMs and posts, you ladies are amazing and i wish every single one of us, our BFPs.

Ugh, im sitting there in the or room with my feet in the stir ups, chit chatting with the embryologist and DH about my "beautiful embies" (I have a pic of them ) Happy as a clam. Dr. V comes in takes one look at my tummy and shakes his head. I felt a little bloated and pressure but I thought it was all par for the course, he did a sono and then called my doc when he came back in the room he started blabbering away I stop him mid sentence AM I HAVING THE TRANSFER OR NOTTTTTTTTT, he says no, I just throw my hands over my face, devastated, totally defeated. First I miss an IUI cycle because of miscommunication, then I Ovulate OVER the damn BCPs and now I hyperstim, this has been the IVF cycle from hell and it started in JUNE. How much am I suppose to take. Are you freaking kidding me. Im not sad, I AM $ISSED THE %UC* OFF.

He put me on meds (cabergoline) to help with the fluids and swelling, I go to see Dr. B tomorrow. I am hoping we can still do a 5 day transfer, but realistically I know we may have to freeze. Just give me my damn embies ill put them back in myself !!!!!!!

I want the roller coaster to stop, I want to get off. I need a break.

Thanks for the prayers and hugs ladies.

8/18/10: Good news, i didn't have to kill anyone today :) We went thru with the transfer (day 5), we transferred two beautiful blast. The embryologist, Ana (who by the way we love love love) said it looks like we will have 2 really good blast to freeze. The Dr. seemed 2 hesitate for a second and kept running the sono over my stomach, i said if you dont want to do the transfer thats fine, ill do it myself :))) She obliged.....So now we wait, fun fun fun, i go for beta next Thur.

7pm: Doctor B calls me at home to just check in on me....im so thankful i have him in my corner.

I am going to go eat my pineapple core now lol

8/23/10: i feel waves of complete panic out of nowhere, it is so bizzare. i just want the waiting to be over. its the worst part. i can deal with anything. negative or positive, whatever, JUST let me know so i can move on 2 the next step. i HATE this.

8/26/10: Beta came back at a 12.
I have to go back on Saturday for a repeat data. Dr. B said i have a 50/50 shot Has anyone had such a low beta # (i am 8dp5dt)and gone on to have a successful pregnancy? I don't know how to feel right now

8/27/10: Spotting starts, then goes into full blown period.

8/28/10: Dr. B meeting, its a chemical, going to go for immune testing. We have to wait a cycle before i can start a FET. I have 2 good quality embies on ice and im praying that they work. Although i can't help but think if a picture perfect fresh cycle was a bust and so was 4 IUIs, why should this??

8/30/10: Beta went from 12 to 7....i am still bleeding and cramping a lot, i thought by now it would be 0, ugh i can't even miscarry right. Beyond frustrating. Went for immune testing w/ Dr. B and now off to Quest for HLA and anti heprain testing. My entire life revolves around doctor and lab appointments. So sick of it ALL.

I never thought i would be on year THREE and still no babies.

9/7/10: Immune testing comes back, elevated NK cells. Treatable with intralipids. Oh joy, the fun just never ends.

9/23/10: CD1. Finally, begin my "natural FET"


9/27/10: Start Viagra Suppositories
Vitamin E
Pre Natal
Baby Asprin
Fish Oil
(so much for natural)
Accupunture 1x week

10/2/10: B/W and sono. 12mm follie and a few small, Dr. B estimates ovulation mid week. Stop viagra, restart monday.

10/4/10: B/W and sono. 16.99 Follie, E2 170, lining at 7.2, not so great, start viagra supps tonight.

10/6/10: B/W and sono. 20mm Follie, lining at 8.8!!!! LH Surge. Everything looks good. Dr. B scheduled FET for TUESDAY!!!

Meds:
Predisone 10mg 2x a day (can we say INSOMNIA)
Cipro - 500mg 2x
Clindamycin - Vaginal at bedtime (3 days)

10/7/10: Infusion @ 7pm (Intralipids and Hydration)

10/12/10: Both embies survived the thaw!!! Although one better than the other. Transfer went well, now we wait AGAIN.

Meds Starting 10/13/10:
Continue
Predisone 10mg 2x a day (can we say INSOMNIA)
Cipro - 500mg 2x

Begin
Lovenox 40mg - AM
Crinone 8% - AM
E2V2 with P4-E2V/PROG - Vaginal at bedtime

Vitamin E
Fish Oil
Prenatal
Baby Asprin

So in case you are taking a count, per day, we are up to 10 pills a day, 1 shot, 2 suppositories and a partridge and a pear tree....
Oh yeah, did i mention this was a NATURAL FET PFT.

10/20/10: beta day! Up since 5am. It's like the night before xmas only without santa and the tree;) I pray there is a present for me today...


I AM PREGNAN!!!!!! Beta came back @ 80 !!! Dr. B thinks this is a good solid # and i go back Friday for a repeat to see if it doubles!!!!! I AM BEYOND SHOCKED !!!!!!!!!! I can't thank you ladies enough for all your support, and now i need MORE prayers, PLEASE let this stick!!!

10/22/10: *biting nails*
If any countries are looking for new and improved ways to torture prisoners of war, I would highly recommend BETA testing!!! Seriously this is the WORST. It seems like there is never a point where you can stop, breath and enjoy, because there is always something to worry about. I will know by today at 3…I am only hoping I have fingers left by then!

10/22/10: Dr. Just called, beta didnt go up (from 80 to 84) I am devastated. And stuck at work

10/23/10: beta down to 63. Confirmed chemical pregnancy.

Not sure where to go from here.

10/28/10: Beta came back at 414. Dr. B says it is 100% NOT a viable pregnancy and is suspecting an Ectopic I am going tomorrow morning for a sono and more b/w to discuss my "options" I am really scared and can't believe all of this is happening.

10/29/10: Beta came back at 740, sono showed NO sac, yolk, nada. Dr. B couldn't "find" anything anywhere. He seemed REALLY concerned and scheduled an emergency laparoscopy and D&C with Dr. Pilleteri @ Good Sam on Monday morning. I am scared out of my mind. He keeps asking me if i am in any pain, and keeps repeating if i feel anything i should go to the hospital ASAP. This just keeps getting worse and worse, its like a nightmare that i cant wake up from. How many days do you think i will need off from work? I know this sounds horrible, but this weekend is my wedding anniversary, I have been looking fwd to this for some time now and i thought since going thru this %hit for over a year this was OUR weekend for us, i am so MAD right now. I can never take a break from IF


11/1/10: Before my lap i am scheduled for a sono with Dr. B to see one last time if he can "locate" the embryo. The embryo that was suppose to be in my tube. Guess what, minutes before scheduled D&C, Dr. B finds a SAC!!! in my Uterus and NOT in a tube. Dr. B "thinks" he sees a sac and orders a beta, all the while insisting the pregancy is NOT viable ...so we do NOT go to the hospital, instead we wait for beta, Dr. B repeats over and over his opinion is it will start declining....beta comes back and more than doubles at 1700. He still says we should go for the D&C, dh and I agree, Dr. B is 100% sure it is not viable, so why should i delay the inevitable. I just want this over. So he calls Pilleteri and he refuses to do the D&C today because of the beta doubling. Dr. B says i need to go back Wednesday. It is really hard not to have some hope here. I trust Dr. B opinions, but he has been wrong before, and i am hoping against all odds he is wrong now. He said there is NO chance, not one percent, if that is true why does Dr. P refuse to do anything till Wed.? This is COMPLETE craziness?!?! It is not even 7pm, and i feel like its 2am. Today has been the most emotionally draining day i have ever had. Has anyone been thru anything similiar????

Re: UPDATE 11/4/10

I'm soooo sorry!!

What a crazy day!!!!

I'm glad you are going to have a break too. After all that, you deserve and need a break.

Re: UPDATE 11/4/10

Wow. That's all I can say.

Rest assured that the hardest part is OVER and you can now focus on this forced break and moving forward. That experience sounds CRAZY!

One good thing is how compassionate you mentioned all the staff was. That helps an unimaginable amount!!!!!!!! When I went for my D&E I felt like I had to remind people what I was there for, and I never met a colder group of heartless medical people from the drs to the nurses- and that was at Mt.Sinai where they are supposed to have such a good reputation! So, what I mean to say is, I'm glad that despite all the torture, the staff was very kind to you because it makes a world of differerence!!

I am so glad to see you are home and hopefully are taking the rest of the week off to rest up.

Re: UPDATE 11/4/10

x10000

Im so sorry you had to go through that...

Re: UPDATE 11/4/10

I am so sorry! A forced break is sometimes the only way we can break. Hopefully this time will give you some time to heal, physically, mentally & emotionally.