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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
SOOOO I'm having a scheduled C section on June 29th, next Wed. My brother's GF is pregnant as well (due sept 7th). She has a 3d sono scheduled for June 29th. I didn't have a choice in the c section date at all. I was TOLD what day it would be. The hospital will call me the day before to tell me what time to be there so i don't even have a time.
ANYWAY... my brother's gf is a pretty crabby preggo, always upset over something or just upset over nothing. She wants my mother to go to the 3d sono with her so she could "share the experience with my mother". I think she should be more worried about sharing the experience with my brother since they are having a baby together. Anyway the gf has a mother and an aunt who dote over her. BUT she wants my mother to Leave the hospital (LIJ on LI) to go to her sono appt in Queens. Appt is set for 4pm.
I cannot even believe anyone is entertaining this idea. Anyway, my mother has been telling her she will try to do both (which is a mistake on my mother's part because she should be saying my daughter is having a c section that day and I can't leave to watch a sono).
Anyway my grandmother ended up telling the gf that my mother can't go to the sono appt and now the gf is all upset over this.
I just can't even fathom this. it's beyond my reasonable and logical comprehension. I would NEVER expect someone to leave the hospital from their daughter giving birth via ANY method to go see a sono.
My brother is saying to my mother "it's OK if you can't come to the sono appt"... my mother's response is "oh your a boy and you just don't understand". Actually, i think my brother is making the most sense here. It REALLY IS OK if she can't make the sono appt. Since the gf seems unwilling to change her sono appt TOO BAD. How can you even compare the two?????
I'm at the point where I'm ready to just talk to the gf and tell her bluntly since everyone else seems to be walking on egg shells around her because of her crap attitude all the time.
I was just ignoring the stupidity around all this.. but I just got a text from my mother about how upset gf is because my grandmother told her my mom can't make the sono appt. And that was it... I got annoyed.
I just don't understand comparing a sono and a birth... and making someone pick. If I was having the sono and my MIL couldn't make it because her daughter was giving birth that day.. I would NOT question it, not even for a second. Nor would I be upset stomping my feet around like a child over it. If my own mother missed my sono because my brother's gf was having a baby... I still wouldn't question it!!
this is just ridiculous to me!!
Message edited 6/20/2011 3:50:15 PM.
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Posted 6/20/11 3:49 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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teaforthree
My Handsome Boy!
Member since 12/10 2549 total posts
Name:
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
I don't mean to be rude or out of line, but WHY exactly is your mother even entertaining this?
If this were a game of rock, paper, scissors... daughter beats son's girlfriend EVERY TIME!
I'm with you... I can't even FATHOM the lack of commen sense on the parts of your mom and brother's GF through this.
Lots of  that you even have to deal with this.
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| Posted 6/20/11 3:57 PM |
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RocNMel
LIF Adolescent
Member since 7/07 697 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
I hate people who think they are the only person in the world, or the only person who has ever been pregnant ever  . Good for grandma that she spoke up! If I was her (your bro's gf) I would have changed the date of my sonogram so I could attend the birth of your baby as well, that idea seemed to not be mentioned at all. But if I were you, I'd speak up to my mom, brother and brother's gf as calmly as possible and tell them how you feel. If my mom ever left to go to my brother's gf's sonogram on the day of her grandchilds BIRTH I'd flip. She'll have more sono's, she needs to get over it lol. If the gf flips out then you know it's out of jealousy that she's keeping her apt...she wants to make sure nobody forgets she's preggo too There's just no reason...I've changed apt's a few times and it's no problem at all AND my sono place is extremely busy because it's high risk.
Message edited 6/20/2011 3:59:48 PM.
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| Posted 6/20/11 3:58 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Everyone has been catering to her since the beginning, why should now be any different?
If it were me, I would just tell her that birth trumps sono. End of story.
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| Posted 6/20/11 3:58 PM |
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ar1stbaby
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/10 844 total posts
Name:
Alisha
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Oh I am so sorry, I would be so ****** off. If it were me I would say something to the GF and probably yell at my mom that she would entertain this idea. Its your mom and its your birth, whatever method it is. A sono, at least you can show pictures. Thats my advice, i am having lots of issues with family so if my anger comes through. i ahve little patience anymore for the insanity that family does when something is going on.
Good luck.. You ahve more things to worry about like your c section and your baby.
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| Posted 6/20/11 3:58 PM |
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
I hope this doesn't sound rude- but I think I'd be more upset with my mother.
Don't they get a video of the 3D sono? and lots of pictures? There's no reason your mom needs to be there instead of with you.
You need to tell your mom to speak to hershe WON'T be there unless she changes the appointment!
Good luck! I'm sorry your brother's gf is being such a pain
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:00 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by teaforthree
I don't mean to be rude or out of line, but WHY exactly is your mother even entertaining this?
If this were a game of rock, paper, scissors... daughter beats son's girlfriend EVERY TIME!
I'm with you... I can't even FATHOM the lack of commen sense on the parts of your mom and brother's GF through this.
Lots of that you even have to deal with this.
Not out of line at all. I questioned this as well. At first I thought my mother was really planning on doing both. And maybe she still is. But when I told her that's going to be impossible she said "I Know". So then I started thinking maybe she was just saying that to GF to appease her since she's always in a bad mood.
GF shower was this Sat... I got the date on Thurs or Fri... was told not to tell GF the date because she's going to get upset over it. GF mother and aunt didn't want her to know.
UMM It's not like my c section date is changing! Anyway DH told my brother the date and he told GF. so she found out anyway, not that she wouldn't have eventually.
I just feel like everyone caters to her all the time because they are scared of having to deal with her.
But the thing is.... I'm not... and the last person she wants to contact her to tell her how immature, ridiculous and selfish she's being is me because I'm blunt and straight to the point. But really at this point, someone needs to tell her and I think put her in her place because this is beyond ridiculous and out of hand.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:02 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by whoops2under2
I hope this doesn't sound rude- but I think I'd be more upset with my mother.
Don't they get a video of the 3D sono? and lots of pictures? There's no reason your mom needs to be there instead of with you.
You need to tell your mom to speak to hershe WON'T be there unless she changes the appointment!
Good luck! I'm sorry your brother's gf is being such a pain
Yes they get a dvd of it!!! that's the best part!! you aren't even missing anything!!
I think my mother needs to grow a pair and say that to her as well!!!
I'm told my mother SHE needs to tell her she can't make it and that's it.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:04 PM |
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summerbaby11
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/10 779 total posts
Name:
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
OMG. ITA with you and i'd be sooo pissssed. what a ***** your brother's gf is being - sorry, but it's true. she sounds like a selfish baby. there is no way a birth compares to a sono. and she can reschedule hers obviously if she is DYING for your mom to be there!
knowing me, I'd tell my mom I'm upset she's even considering it, and I'd tell the gf she needs a reality check.
I'm just really  reading this.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:04 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by RocNMel
I hate people who think they are the only person in the world, or the only person who has ever been pregnant ever . Good for grandma that she spoke up! If I was her (your bro's gf) I would have changed the date of my sonogram so I could attend the birth of your baby as well, that idea seemed to not be mentioned at all. But if I were you, I'd speak up to my mom, brother and brother's gf as calmly as possible and tell them how you feel. If my mom ever left to go to my brother's gf's sonogram on the day of her grandchilds BIRTH I'd flip. She'll have more sono's, she needs to get over it lol. If the gf flips out then you know it's out of jealousy that she's keeping her apt...she wants to make sure nobody forgets she's preggo too There's just no reason...I've changed apt's a few times and it's no problem at all AND my sono place is extremely busy because it's high risk.
rescheduling would be THE MOST reasonable thing to do here.
When GF mother and aunt found out the date they didn't suggest or offer that as an option.. instead they basically told my mother "oh I don't envy you having to pick".
Ummm REALLY???
Anyway so after that... it was never offered as an option AT ALL.
My mother was asking me if it's possible she could switch the date for the sono... I said OF COURSE it is!!
So I just asked my mother what about switching the sono appt... now the answer is "they are too booked up" but I don't think they even called to do it. I think their only solution to the situation was to have my mother go to LIJ with me and leave around 3 to go to queens for the sono... stay in queen for however long it takes and then drive back to li in rush hour traffic bc GF wants so desperately to share this sono experience with my mother.
truth be told... i think gf thinks she's having this baby with my mother and not my brother. she's been VERY nasty to my brother lately. Latest comment: she told my brother "i want to go out after the baby is born". Brother says: "OK good, I can have my mom babysit and we can go out someplace". GF: "NO! I want you to watch the baby while me and your mother go out". This was NOT a joke.. this was a serious comment!! She meant it!!
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:08 PM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Normally, I would think it's nice to bring MIL/mom of BF to a sono. Make everyone welcome, blah blah blah.
But in this case, I think your brother GF is just being manipulative. She can change the date if it's really important to her to have your mom there. It's crazy to expect you mom to leave where you are giving birth to go to a sono.
I would love to see what would happen if you mom tried to schedule something else on GF's due date
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:16 PM |
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Bearcat
Love my little girls!!! <3
Member since 6/10 10818 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
completely and utterly unreasonable!!
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:19 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by CrankyPants
Normally, I would think it's nice to bring MIL/mom of BF to a sono. Make everyone welcome, blah blah blah.
But in this case, I think your brother GF is just being manipulative. She can change the date if it's really important to her to have your mom there. It's crazy to expect you mom to leave where you are giving birth to go to a sono.
I would love to see what would happen if you mom tried to schedule something else on GF's due date
maybe I will be the one to schedule something on GF due date and insist my mother goes!!!
(devil icon here)
Message edited 6/20/2011 4:25:00 PM.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:24 PM |
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blustar214
So in love with my little girl
Member since 1/10 2471 total posts
Name:
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
This sounds so ridiculous to me. I don't understand why your brother's GF would even think this is a possibility.
And it also seems a little weird to me that she's trying to get YOUR Mom to leave you on one of, if not THE most important day of your life, to go to a sono.
Won't the sono also be taped/put on a DVD or something?
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:28 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by blustar214
This sounds so ridiculous to me. I don't understand why your brother's GF would even think this is a possibility.
And it also seems a little weird to me that she's trying to get YOUR Mom to leave you on one of, if not THE most important day of your life, to go to a sono.
Won't the sono also be taped/put on a DVD or something?
YES! It will be on a dvd so we can all have a sono dvd watching party on the day I come home from the hospital!! I'm totally being sarcastic but at this point I wouldn't put it passed her.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:32 PM |
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blustar214
So in love with my little girl
Member since 1/10 2471 total posts
Name:
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by MrsKS
Posted by blustar214
This sounds so ridiculous to me. I don't understand why your brother's GF would even think this is a possibility.
And it also seems a little weird to me that she's trying to get YOUR Mom to leave you on one of, if not THE most important day of your life, to go to a sono.
Won't the sono also be taped/put on a DVD or something?
YES! It will be on a dvd so we can all have a sono dvd watching party on the day I come home from the hospital!! I'm totally being sarcastic but at this point I wouldn't put it passed her.
She sounds a little nutty.
I guess I would just try to shrug it off as a crazy request, have your brother or Mom tell her that it's a shame, but it's not happening, but I"m sure your Mom will find the time to sit down and watch the DVD with her at some point.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:34 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
my mother should most definitely be the one to tell her "I'm sorry but I can't make the sono appt since my daugher is having a baby that day I have to be at the hospital"
And the problem here is that my mother is instead saying "I will try to do both".
It's wrong. And my mother knows she can't make both.. she's told me. So I don't understand leading the GF on. Just tell her. I can't imagine anyone saying "no you have to come to my sono.. how about you just skip the birth and come to the sono appt with MEEEEEE!!!!!" it's insane!
ETA: and "a little nutty" is being nice. Cause i think she sounds like a major A HOLE!
Message edited 6/20/2011 4:39:20 PM.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:38 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
This is just ridiculous. I would want to call her myself and put her in her place. But I think that your mother should be the one to explain that it is completely unreasonable to ask her to leave YOU while you are delivering to watch a sonogram. There will be other ways to bond.
And btw, wouldn't your brother want to be at the hospital with you guys that day? His GF is really putting everyone in a very unfair situation and someone needs to suck it up and tell her.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:38 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by Pomegranate5
This is just ridiculous. I would want to call her myself and put her in her place. But I think that your mother should be the one to explain that it is completely unreasonable to ask her to leave YOU while you are delivering to watch a sonogram. There will be other ways to bond.
And btw, wouldn't your brother want to be at the hospital with you guys that day? His GF is really putting everyone in a very unfair situation and someone needs to suck it up and tell her.
I would think so. But at this rate he's probably gotten used to catering to her because she's been so mean and nasty lately. I don't think anyone wants to do anything to set her off. Which IMO is stupid.. you can't live like that!
I think someone def needs to tel her. If my mother doesn't tell her... I'm going to call her myself. I'm the blunt one and I have no problem just letting her know how stupid this all sounds.
But I am still dumbfounded by this whole thing. I can't even imagine being this immature throwing a temper tantrum and acting the way she's acting over this situation.
Message edited 6/20/2011 4:43:36 PM.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:42 PM |
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Elbee
Zanzibar
Member since 5/05 10767 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
the 'normal' thing to do is to reschedule the sono .... it's unreasonable to expect your mother to leave that day and it's unfair to have your brother, who may want to meet his niece/nephew that day, to have to choose. She should call and explain the situation and try to reschedule for the day before or the day after. It's not like it's your choice when the c section was. She's not playing nice at all.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:46 PM |
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cinnabon
Complete..
Member since 6/10 1592 total posts
Name:
B
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Posted by whoops2under2
I hope this doesn't sound rude- but I think I'd be more upset with my mother.
Don't they get a video of the 3D sono? and lots of pictures? There's no reason your mom needs to be there instead of with you.
You need to tell your mom to speak to hershe WON'T be there unless she changes the appointment!
Good luck! I'm sorry your brother's gf is being such a pain
This is how I feel. More mad at mom for even thinking about it. And I wouldn't hesitate to call the gf and tell her how you feel. 
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:50 PM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Kerri, I cant believe you havent told the GF that your mom just can't come. You must be holdign your tongue.
And IMO I would just say right out to her No she is not coming. I am haivng a baby and my mother needs to be there.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:52 PM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
I would be livid..you don't want me to go on a rant here, but your brother's gf is a selfish idiot
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:53 PM |
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MissingLI
Such a Big Boy!
Member since 1/06 1602 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Don't call the gf. It's not going to do anything. She's still going to be a PIA. She's still going to be a brat. She's still going to have a temper tantrum. You can't control her or her actions. You can only control your own. Calling her up and stressing yourself out a few days before your C-section isn't going to help you.
Honestly the person creating this problem is your mom. She is the one that perpetuated the issue. If she had just said from the beginning that she could not make it there would be no issue. Would gf still be pissing and moaning, probably...but it would be settled. Hell, even your brother gets it.
The person to speak with is your mom. Talk to her calmly about how this has made you felt. What is the bottom line about your feelings. Is it that your mom even hinting that she would try to do both making you feel less important? If it is, tell your mom that.
If you know for a fact that your mom is definately going to be with you than her leave it be. Let gf blow her fat mouth all over and just ignore it.
I'm sorry you are having to deal with this immaturity from gf.
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| Posted 6/20/11 4:56 PM |
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koala
LIF Toddler
Member since 1/11 386 total posts
Name:
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Re: VENT!!! IDK what to make of this anymore!!
Wow! This is so ridiculous!! How old is GF?? She sounds like an immature bratty little kid!
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| Posted 6/20/11 5:06 PM |
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