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dlj97
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 4399 total posts
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WWYD - Nursery School "incident" UPDATE
Today was DD's first day of nursery school. When I picked her up, the teacher said that DD said she had to go to the bathroom, and the teacher told me that one of the other kid's mother took DD. She quickly added that the bathroom is right across the hall and that she watched the whole time, but I am a little freaked out that they would let my child go off with a stranger.
Would you pull your DC out of the school if this happened? It makes me very nervous for her safety.
UPDATE: I just called the director and she explained that she has known the mother for many years (she was her next door neighbor and is a member of the temple where the nursery school is) and that the mother just enrolled her child and has been staying most of the day with her kid to get them adjusted, so she said my DD thought she was one of the teachers and asked her to take her. The director said she knew that happened and knows the teacher was watching. I am still not thrilled, but I am not going to pull her out.
Message edited 9/11/2013 1:33:08 PM.
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Posted 9/10/13 5:29 PM  |
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bpmom
Feeling Blessed
Member since 6/07 2963 total posts
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
I wouldn't pull her, but I'd let the teacher know I'm only comfortable with DC using the toilet with a teacher or the director (or other staff). They're licensed, background checked, fingerprinted, etc and while you'd hope the other kid's mom is a nice/decent/regular person, I'm paranoid about stuff like this and I would definitely say something.
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| Posted 9/10/13 5:34 PM |
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lynnd126
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 2630 total posts
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WWYD - Nursery School
I would GO NUTS. Honestly, that's extremely inappropriate. I mean, is that their bathroom plan? Wth?
Eta in my kids' school there are a few designated bathroom trips with a bunch of kids and then on top of that when a kid asks they take them and also again ask if anyone needs to go. Just as an example.
Message edited 9/10/2013 6:03:18 PM.
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| Posted 9/10/13 5:59 PM |
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want2beamom
Love my boys soooo much!!!
Member since 8/06 10164 total posts
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True love doesn't end with happily ever after...
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
I would not pull my child out for this, but I would make it known that I am fully aware and will be making sure it doesnt happen again. The teacher obvs knew it was wrong, or she wouldnt have said anything to you.
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| Posted 9/10/13 6:41 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
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Karen
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
It's day one, so I wouldn't pull her out, but I would inquire further.
~ What is their general bathroom plan?
~ Is this a cooperative school where a parent is always in the classroom? What was the other parent doing there in the first place?
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| Posted 9/10/13 6:44 PM |
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SecretTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 2284 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
That is completely inappropriate and I would question any teacher who thought that was acceptable. I would probably even make a complaint to NYS. Why on earth would that even happen? Who is the teacher to authorize that? None of those parents are teachers who have been fingerprinted or undergone background checks.
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| Posted 9/10/13 6:53 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
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L
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
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| Posted 9/10/13 6:55 PM |
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lynnd126
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 2630 total posts
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:17 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:24 PM |
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dlj97
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 4399 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by Karen
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
There are 2 teachers so I don't think the issue was that she couldn't leave the other kids. And this was our very first day, so I don't know any other parents. My DD is 2 and the only one potty trained in the class, and it wasn't during drop off or pick up time.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:33 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by dlj97
Posted by Karen
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
There are 2 teachers so I don't think the issue was that she couldn't leave the other kids. And this was our very first day, so I don't know any other parents. My DD is 2 and the only one potty trained in the class, and it wasn't during drop off or pick up time.
Based on the size of the class, they might legally need 2 adults in the room, I would definitely inquire about that.
If it wasn't drop off or pick-up, why was the other mom there?
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:36 PM |
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lynnd126
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 2630 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by Karen
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
At our school there's enough staff to cover for potty trips no matter when. It's an every day occurrence so it needs to be thoroughly thought out. I think there's an assistant at our school that sort of floats between classes for extra hands.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:44 PM |
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mosh913
baby boy coming spring '11
Member since 5/05 3133 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
I would flip! Are they kidding me?!? I didn't send my kid to a preschool daycare b/c my first impression when I walked through the door was a little girl on the toilet with the door open. The bathroom is near the entrance/exit they use and I couldn't believe they left e door open as I was buzzed in! I would speak to the director but I'd prob want to pull her too.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:48 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by Karen
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
At our school there's enough staff to cover for potty trips no matter when. It's an every day occurrence so it needs to be thoroughly thought out. I think there's an assistant at our school that sort of floats between classes for extra hands.
That's why I am wondering if this is a cooperative school where a parent is the other set of hands, so to speak. I know when my girlfriend had to put in her days at her son's school, it was a lot of bathroom trips.
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| Posted 9/10/13 7:51 PM |
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dlj97
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 4399 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by Karen
Posted by dlj97
Posted by Karen
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
Totally agree, but what is the solution??
Honestly if a child needs to go to the potty during drop out, the parents need to deal with it. I think it's slightly ridiculous that 5 minutes after you drop them off they have to use the potty already?? DD's nursery school had a strict policy about using the potty down the hall before the child entered the classroom and now I can totally see why.
There are 2 teachers so I don't think the issue was that she couldn't leave the other kids. And this was our very first day, so I don't know any other parents. My DD is 2 and the only one potty trained in the class, and it wasn't during drop off or pick up time.
Based on the size of the class, they might legally need 2 adults in the room, I would definitely inquire about that.
If it wasn't drop off or pick-up, why was the other mom there?
No clue why the parent was there. There are only 5 kids, so I don't think they need 2 teachers. It is a nursery school at a temple.
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| Posted 9/10/13 8:17 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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WWYD - Nursery School
Honestly, that would be a no go for me, and I would pull my child. If there are only 5 kids in the class, and 2 teachers, why would they have a stranger take the child to the bathroom? Completely inappropriate.
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| Posted 9/10/13 8:31 PM |
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schmora15
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 2476 total posts
Name:
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WWYD - Nursery School
IMO I would typically find it unacceptable. I would discuss it with the director and depending on their response decide what to do. With only 5 kids I wouldn't see the need for a parent to take your LO to the bathroom. They are 2 year olds though so who knows.
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| Posted 9/10/13 8:36 PM |
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JennyPenny
?
Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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WWYD - Nursery School
That would seriously bug me
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:10 PM |
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SecretTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 2284 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Totally wrong too.
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:21 PM |
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SecretTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 2284 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
BTW, who is that teacher to even allow another parent to see your child undressed. I am really appalled by this.
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:23 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
So what are they to do when one teacher is outside helping the kids get into the room at drop off, the other teacher is in the room with the kids. If one of the kids that are already in the room needs to go to the bathroom, what do you think happens? I would not be thrilled for a strange parent to change a baby, but to stand in a room making sure the kids are ok is totally fine with me. It is not as if they are roaming around. The bathroom at my DDs preschool is completely visible too. I am asking in all seriousness, what should the teacher do when a kid needs to go at an off scheduled time. Do your preschools have 3 people in a room with 3 kids?
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:32 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by lynnd126
Posted by LSP2005
I would not pull my child over this, but I would ask about their bathroom plan. Today I was dropping of my DD at preschool. One of the other children needed to use the bathroom and only one teacher was in the room at that moment. She took the child to the bathroom while I stayed with the rest of the kids -there were only 2 there at that moment. Mine and a third child. I know them, I know their parents. It was all of 2 minutes and they were 100% fine. I know other parents have done the same thing.
Almost as inappropriate imo. There should be a protocol and that's that, outside of some kind of extenuating circumstance.
I agree. No preschooler should be left unsupervised and the school should not have to rely on a parent to be a substitute even if it was for 5 minutes.
I'm pretty lax about this kind of stuff but I would seriously doubt a school that had a teacher who let my kid go to the bathroom with another parent.
Our preschool has kid bathrooms that are part of the classroom. There are also always 2 teachers in a room. During playground play, one teacher is always available to bring a child inside for potty.
We toured 10+ preschools. It didn't bother me much but security was important to DH. Some of the co-op and church preschools did not have much or any security. DH thought our kid could easily walk off or any stranger (looking like a parent) could come to the school and take a kid.
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:56 PM |
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lynnd126
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 2630 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by LSP2005
So what are they to do when one teacher is outside helping the kids get into the room at drop off, the other teacher is in the room with the kids. If one of the kids that are already in the room needs to go to the bathroom, what do you think happens? I would not be thrilled for a strange parent to change a baby, but to stand in a room making sure the kids are ok is totally fine with me. It is not as if they are roaming around. The bathroom at my DDs preschool is completely visible too. I am asking in all seriousness, what should the teacher do when a kid needs to go at an off scheduled time. Do your preschools have 3 people in a room with 3 kids?
But what if there's no random person to ask? That mom just happened to be there. IMO there HAS TO be a plan, an extra hand- someone that actually works there and has been vetted.
Also, in your specific example, one teacher imo is capable of handling entering children and watching children already inside. In the op's scenario I think there's just one person period on the five kids, no? To me,that's lack of any preparation.
Eta I re-read and I'm not sure if there were one or two teachers. I'm reading two different posts from the op that address that question, but I think they say different things. Maybe only one was present at that moment?
Message edited 9/10/2013 10:07:26 PM.
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| Posted 9/10/13 9:58 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: WWYD - Nursery School "incident"
Posted by LSP2005
So what are they to do when one teacher is outside helping the kids get into the room at drop off, the other teacher is in the room with the kids. If one of the kids that are already in the room needs to go to the bathroom, what do you think happens? I would not be thrilled for a strange parent to change a baby, but to stand in a room making sure the kids are ok is totally fine with me. It is not as if they are roaming around. The bathroom at my DDs preschool is completely visible too. I am asking in all seriousness, what should the teacher do when a kid needs to go at an off scheduled time. Do your preschools have 3 people in a room with 3 kids?
Our preschool starts at 9 sharp. Parents are asked to drop off kids 10 minutes before 9. Parents walk kids inside to their classroom or the playground if the teacher is outside. If you get to school after 9, the receptionist, assistant director or director walks the child to the classroom.
The layout of DS's clas has two classrooms that are adjacent. Some classrooms have a door separating them while others are open. I think they do this so teachers can double up when there are times when teachers need to step out. I'm not sure if this is the reason why they have adjacent rooms but it seems to work at DS's school.
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| Posted 9/10/13 10:05 PM |
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BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre
Member since 5/05 9320 total posts
Name:
Mrs. B
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WWYD - Nursery School
This would make me go ape shiit mad!!!
In my DS's school they are expected to be potty trained. The teacher nor the aide can help DS pull his pants up or down when they take him to the potty. If he has an accident my mom gets a call (I work FT) and has to go to the school to change him.
Yesterday, I was home because it was his first full day. So the school called me because he pooped. I went there to change him and it turns out he just passed gas. The teacher was sorry that I had to come over but she said she can not touch him to even check. Since DS is not potty trained, my mom anticipates being up there a few times a day.
I would be speaking to the supervisor/principal and making sure they understand I DO NOT want my child going to the bathroom with anyone that does not work in the school!
ETA: We are to bring our child to the bathroom after we hang up their backpacks in the classroom.
Message edited 9/10/2013 10:08:43 PM.
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| Posted 9/10/13 10:07 PM |
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