WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....UPDATE on last post

So SIL has decided to get married and has decided to do it in Mexico....on a Monday...in October.

This comes about 2 months after my due date, which doesn't interrupt any work for ME, but DH will have to take off 2 unpaid days from work, which does not make any of us happy, being he's been laid off with the union for the past 5 months and counting, but that's another story.

Anyway, my dilemma is this.....I have no idea how I am going to feel, physically or emotionally.

DH is split on whether to go or not.
He feels like he should go being that it's his sister, but we really know very little about her fiance, it's a Monday which we feel she has not shown any courtesy to her immediate family (I know it's her wedding but then don't say "who cares if it's a Monday when you are on vacation??!?!?), and we will have a 2-month old who I am not sure I am willing to leave at that age. Who knows how he/she will be? Not to mention that it will cost about 2k for us to go plus time off from DH's work and I won't be working or have any income......

DH asked if we would leave our current son home, but with who? My mom who will already be watching a newborn? I can't ask her to do that! Plus I am not too sure how comfortable I am with just DH and DS going, but then what would it be like home for me alone with 2 while DH is sunning it up in Mexico?????

Ahhhh, so much to think about and I know I am overthinking it. I told DH I am not booking anything right now so we will just have to wait and see, but he seems to think we need to book something now.

WWYD?

ETA...plus I am trying to save to take DH away for his 40th, which was SUPPOSED to be in late October but now is getting pushed to January.
ETA: New Baby is NOT going at all.....

Message edited 2/19/2010 11:26:38 AM.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

When my BIL was getting married when I was going to have an 8 week old (he pushed back the wedding and got married last month) it was only in Atlanta and NO ONE expected me to go.. okay.. maybe they did but, I put it out there right away that I wasn't doing it and they didn't say anything

I wouldn't go. You won't want to leave a 2 month old. But, probably DH needs to go. My DH was going to go. Maybe your Mom can take your DS for those few days so it is just you and the baby.. Or can she come stay with you to help out?

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

Finances would be the big thing preventing me from going.

If my DH was out of work for so long, we'd just be getting back on our feet, especially with a new baby on the way. Plus, I'd hate for him to have to ask for the additional time off from work, whether it was paid or not. Him keeping his job would be a priority. Will he be taking some time off when your new baby comes?

I'm sure your DH isn't the only one dealing with the logistics of a wedding in Mexico on a Monday. There will be many people who can't/wont go. Perhaps a family dinner at a nice restaurant celebrating their marrige after they come home from their honeymoon would be more appropriate.

ETA: I personally wouldn't leave my 2 month old home and go away with just my DH. Looking back on when my DS was two months old...you couldn't pry him from my arms. Either we all go, or DH would have to go by himself.

Message edited 2/18/2010 12:52:16 PM.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

No way in hel* I'd travel out of my local vicinity with a 2 month old...and especially to a loud wedding. Sorry.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

thanks everyone!
The more I think about it the more I agree that it's probably not in the best interest of my family.
I didn't even think about the time off when the baby arrives so that's a pretty good (and big!) point.....

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

I think I would have considered it if it was your first, one small baby traveling (albeit to Mexico, and you'd need to get him/her a passport, and FAST)

Actually! Use that as your reason! The new baby can't travel abroad and you can't get him/her a passport in time (I mean, you could but it would be )

But with two kids, the work situation, etc, etc. I'd probably say no or worst case have DH go alone

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

It seems like you've already made up your mind not to go. I don't blame you, I have a 7 week old and I wouldn't want to travel with him. I'm tired and he is just getting over RSV. I wouldn't take him anywhere that could expose him to getting sick and be around viruses/germs on the airplane with no fresh air around. What happens if he gets sick in Mexico? I say skip it SIL will have to understand that when you pick to have destination wedding not everyone can make it.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

I would definitely NOT want to go. If there has to be an appearance, I'd send DH by himself but even then I'd be hesitant because of the $$$ issue with the days off of work.

I probably wouldn't even consider ME going because of the baby.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

I wouldn't go- if anything maybe send your husband.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

does the wedding fall on Columbus Day? perhaps that is why it is a monday....

I travelled to Miami when my son was 9wks old to visit his grandparents. At first I was so stressed about it but it was all for nothing! It was the best thing I could have ever done. He was an angel for the entire trip and I really needed the change of scenery, and it gave me a boost of confidence, etc and it was nice to spend quality time with my husband too.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

honestly if it were us, I'd tell DH to go b/c its is sister but I dont feel I'd go with a 2 month old. if I could have my family watch the baby I may consider going to avoid possible drama in the future.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....UPDATE on last post

I would stay home with the 2 kids and let DH go for a few days. I wouldn't want him to miss his sister's wedding, but there is no way I would be travelling out of the country with a 2 month old and would not want my other DS in a foreign country without me, even if he was with his dad.

Re: WWYD? Newborn and traveling.....UPDATE on last post