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stinger
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 4971 total posts
Name:
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WWYD...update
DD is 13 and was invited to dinner for a friends bday. Just found out friend told 6 girls she invited they have to pay for their own dinner! Its at a hibachi place and i dont know the parents. I told DD this was extremely rude and now she cant spend much on a present ($ is tight right now).
I guess i can tell her to just get a cheaper meal or send her with $25-30 and give $20 as a present?
WWYD?
Message edited 10/7/2016 9:08:44 AM.
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Posted 10/4/16 7:27 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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RainyDay
LIF Adult
Member since 6/15 3990 total posts
Name:
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WWYD
Ummm yea that's rude. I would Def budget for a 25 to 30 meal and cheaper gift.
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:43 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: WWYD
I would call the parents to clarify what is going on. Just say you wanted to make sure your DD had enough funds to pay for her meal etc...then they can clarify if they are paying or not.
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:45 PM |
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!
Member since 6/07 8274 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: WWYD
Maybe she doesn't need to give a gift? It's not a party, just a dinner... Especially since she has to pay for herself... I don't think I'd feel obligated to give a gift. Like if I go out to dinner for a friends birthday, and we each pay for ourselves (and cover the person's birthday dinner), I don't bring a gift.
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:45 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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WWYD
I would never show up for a kid's birthday celebration without a gift, so I definitely wouldn't go that route. Honestly, I would a. either call the parents to clarify...or b. just decline. I think that's extremely tacky that they are asking the guests to pay.
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:49 PM |
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Lara&Aidansmommy
For mom i miss u ETC ILOVEU
Member since 3/07 13921 total posts
Name:
ETC I LOVE YOU
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Re: WWYD
Posted by BargainMama
I would never show up for a kid's birthday celebration without a gift, so I definitely wouldn't go that route. Honestly, I would a. either call the parents to clarify...or b. just decline. I think that's extremely tacky that they are asking the guests to pay.
This!
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:53 PM |
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evrythng4areason
And then there were 4
Member since 1/10 5224 total posts
Name:
Kayla
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WWYD
I feel like at 13 it's not really a kids birthday party any more. Are the parents even going? At 13/14 I was going out to dinner with my friends by myself. I would probably send her with money and then do a small gift-maybe an Alex and ani bracelet?
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| Posted 10/4/16 7:56 PM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by evrythng4areason
I feel like at 13 it's not really a kids birthday party any more. Are the parents even going? At 13/14 I was going out to dinner with my friends by myself. I would probably send her with money and then do a small gift-maybe an Alex and ani bracelet?
This!
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| Posted 10/4/16 8:40 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 7993 total posts
Name:
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WWYD
I think $25-30 for dinner is a lot for dinner and a 13 yr old. Dinners run about $11 I think the last time I went to a place like that.
I too think its rude to ask people to pay, perhaps you can pre pay for her meal when you drop her off, leave her cash for the tip (or pay that) and bring a small gift
PS, I too would call to clarify the details, just to make sure she got the info correct and was not lied to etc.
Message edited 10/4/2016 8:43:08 PM.
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| Posted 10/4/16 8:42 PM |
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Re: WWYD
Posted by luvbuffet
Posted by evrythng4areason
I feel like at 13 it's not really a kids birthday party any more. Are the parents even going? At 13/14 I was going out to dinner with my friends by myself. I would probably send her with money and then do a small gift-maybe an Alex and ani bracelet?
This!
That was my reaction too.
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| Posted 10/4/16 8:44 PM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: WWYD
Posted by BargainMama
I would never show up for a kid's birthday celebration without a gift, so I definitely wouldn't go that route. Honestly, I would a. either call the parents to clarify...or b. just decline. I think that's extremely tacky that they are asking the guests to pay.
This
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| Posted 10/4/16 8:47 PM |
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beachbabe
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/15 731 total posts
Name:
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WWYD
I honestly would decline if it were me. That's so rude and tacky
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| Posted 10/4/16 8:58 PM |
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Summergrl14
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/16 625 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by evrythng4areason
I feel like at 13 it's not really a kids birthday party any more. Are the parents even going? At 13/14 I was going out to dinner with my friends by myself. I would probably send her with money and then do a small gift-maybe an Alex and ani bracelet?
I tend to agree with this. If the girl's parents are hosting a "party" for her than yes they should definitely be paying for all the guests and I think it's terribly tacky not to do so. However, if this 13 year old is just inviting a few friends to go out to dinner with her for her birthday and the parents aren't going to be there than I can see covering the cost of your own meal.
Regardless, I think you should call the girl's parents and find out what the deal is. I do think $25-30, plus a small gift is more than adequate if you decide to let her go.
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| Posted 10/4/16 9:03 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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WWYD
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
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| Posted 10/4/16 9:10 PM |
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evrythng4areason
And then there were 4
Member since 1/10 5224 total posts
Name:
Kayla
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Re: WWYD
Posted by KarenK122
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
I would assume most wouldn't have a problem with it. I used to do this with my friends all the time.
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| Posted 10/4/16 9:31 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by evrythng4areason
Posted by KarenK122
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
I would assume most wouldn't have a problem with it. I used to do this with my friends all the time.
Me too. We were perfectly behaved, paid and tipped appropriately. I also probably used my own babysitting money. I don't think it's odd at all.
OP, I do think it's a bit tacky. I remember doing dinners for birthdays but the parents always sent the birthday girl with enough to pay for everyone. I'd give the money and then let her buy a very inexpensive gift.
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| Posted 10/4/16 9:37 PM |
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jlm2008
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 5092 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by evrythng4areason
I feel like at 13 it's not really a kids birthday party any more. Are the parents even going? At 13/14 I was going out to dinner with my friends by myself. I would probably send her with money and then do a small gift-maybe an Alex and ani bracelet?
ITA
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| Posted 10/4/16 10:01 PM |
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jlm2008
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 5092 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
Uh any place? I was out at decent restaurants, obviously not 5 star ones, with my friends at that age. You're in high school at that age, not a kid.
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| Posted 10/4/16 10:02 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WWYD
Posted by jlm2008
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
Uh any place? I was out at decent restaurants, obviously not 5 star ones, with my friends at that age. You're in high school at that age, not a kid.
13 is middle school not high school and I didn't say they couldn't do it, I just have never seen that in any restaurant I have been too. If they do great for them, I was just asking a question because I have never seen it without an adult present.
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| Posted 10/4/16 11:05 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by KarenK122
Posted by jlm2008
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
Uh any place? I was out at decent restaurants, obviously not 5 star ones, with my friends at that age. You're in high school at that age, not a kid.
13 is middle school not high school and I didn't say they couldn't do it, I just have never seen that in any restaurant I have been too. If they do great for them, I was just asking a question because I have never seen it without an adult present.
Neither have I.
And I never did it either.
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| Posted 10/4/16 11:06 PM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Come to great neck. Tons of teens, mostly girls go out for sushi on a Friday night.
In my day, it was Applebee's
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| Posted 10/4/16 11:10 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by MsSissy
Posted by KarenK122
Posted by jlm2008
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
Uh any place? I was out at decent restaurants, obviously not 5 star ones, with my friends at that age. You're in high school at that age, not a kid.
13 is middle school not high school and I didn't say they couldn't do it, I just have never seen that in any restaurant I have been too. If they do great for them, I was just asking a question because I have never seen it without an adult present.
Neither have I.
And I never did it either.
Ditto
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| Posted 10/5/16 6:56 AM |
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LInMI
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 1800 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by BargainMama
I would never show up for a kid's birthday celebration without a gift, so I definitely wouldn't go that route. Honestly, I would a. either call the parents to clarify...or b. just decline. I think that's extremely tacky that they are asking the guests to pay.
THIS!!!!
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| Posted 10/5/16 7:40 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Wow!! Really??? That is SO tacky and rude. If someone invites a bunch of kids out to dinner for their child's birthday they should be paying. Period. I can't believe they would expect a gift AND for your DD to pay for her own meal. I'd be declining that invite.
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| Posted 10/5/16 8:37 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD
Posted by jlm2008
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's definitely tacky to ask the kids to go and then not cover their meals. They are not adults and can't really "pay" for themselves.
I would go with $25 and send a small gift. I would call the parents though to clarify.
On a side note, maybe I'm living under a rock, but what restaurant (except for a fast food one) would serve a group of 13 year old girls dinner with no adult present, at least at table close by.
Uh any place? I was out at decent restaurants, obviously not 5 star ones, with my friends at that age. You're in high school at that age, not a kid.
You're NOT in high school at age 13!! I turned 13 in SEVENTH GRADE. There is a BIG difference between a JHS kid and a HS kid. My parents weren't strict but I certainly wasn't going out to dinner by myself with friends at 13 years old. That's ridiculous.
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| Posted 10/5/16 8:40 AM |
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