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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by nferrandi
Posted by GoldenRod
Professional daycare providers need to be licensed and trained. Tell GPs that if they want professional salaries, they need to be certified and trained as professionals.
 I'm loving your responses today.
I have my moments....  
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Posted 11/21/07 2:36 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
sometimesmommy
Always in my heart.....
Member since 11/06 6686 total posts
Name:
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
ITA. 
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| Posted 11/21/07 2:39 PM |
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steph4777
**************
Member since 5/05 11726 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
My ILs watch the baby 3-4 days a week and we don't pay them. I don't think they would accept it either. We try to do things like bring them dinner once or twice a week.
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| Posted 11/21/07 3:14 PM |
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yankinmanc
Happy Days!
Member since 8/05 18208 total posts
Name:
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
I think if you are expecting them to do a good job to watch your child, they deserve to be paid a comparable amount to what daycare is paid. Especially if its full time.
Thats just my opinion!
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| Posted 11/21/07 3:15 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by MrsBumbleb
I understand the price of gas is high and I'm not against paying, but I think it is very nervey to expect the same amount. God forbid we should be able to save a buck or two. I mean shouldn't grandparents want to spend time with their grandchildren w/o expecting to get paid?
Opinions?
I would expect the same amount of education and socialisation for my money. No offense to ILs, and no offense to anyone who pays their ILs to mind their children, but if I were to pay MIL or my mom the same amount of money that I pay daycare I would expect the same benefits. JMHO.
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| Posted 11/21/07 3:16 PM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by racheeeee
I think if you are expecting them to do a good job to watch your child, they deserve to be paid a comparable amount to what daycare is paid. Especially if its full time.
Thats just my opinion!
agreed. If you are expecting them to play by all your rules, then they should be paid like you would an employee.
If its the grandparent watching the child for free, since its their grandchild...then I don't think you are able to question methods and ways. They are the grandmothers after all.
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| Posted 11/21/07 3:35 PM |
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Laura1976
Member since 5/05 5754 total posts
Name:
Laura
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
they're are numerous benefits of having grandparents watching your DC over having to put the baby in day care, but i would think one of the benefits is that it would save you money....
My mom watchs DD 4 days a week and laughs at me when we offer her money.
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| Posted 11/21/07 3:56 PM |
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Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it
Member since 5/05 30683 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Wow - I never heard of that - most of the time, I hear grandparents watching their grandkids for free - otherwise, whats th epoint? Why leave them home with gma all day when they can be in daycare and having activities and social experiences?
I agree
My inlaws watch our kids...as you all know it has its ups and downs (mostly downs for us), we have offered to pay her so many times but refuses.
Plus daycare will do what YOU want done.
If they want the same amout I would put them in daycare so your child can socialize and do many activities
Message edited 11/21/2007 4:04:31 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/07 4:03 PM |
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Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it
Member since 5/05 30683 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by racheeeee
I think if you are expecting them to do a good job to watch your child, they deserve to be paid a comparable amount to what daycare is paid. Especially if its full time.
Thats just my opinion!
Not sure I agree with this statment, then if Im paying my inlaws to watch them the same amout as daycare I would expect my inlaws to do EXACTLY what daycare does. Are they going to do arts and crafts and story time and other fun activities that is provided at daycare.
Message edited 11/21/2007 4:07:20 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/07 4:06 PM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
My parents watch DS one, sometimes 2 days a week now that I went back to work part-time and they would NEVER ever ask for a dime. They look at it as an opportunity it see their grandson. I guess everyone is different. If it is full-time it is alot for grandparents and I would definetely offer something but not nearly as much as day care. That is usually the whole point of having grandparents watch your kids, to save $$$. That's why my parents do. They also did not want me putting DS in day care.
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| Posted 11/21/07 4:11 PM |
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
In my situation, when either set of grandparents watches the baby, there are strings attached. I would pay them but if I were paying the same amount that a day care would cost, I would change the rules.
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| Posted 11/21/07 4:56 PM |
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Michelle
My Little Yankee Fans
Member since 1/06 4018 total posts
Name:
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
I understand if they are giving up a job and need the money, but if you are paying the same cost as daycare, might as well pay daycare instead of the grandparetns. Daycares are licensed and will listen to your instructions, grandparents don't always do that.
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| Posted 11/21/07 5:06 PM |
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Palebride
I am an amazing bakist
Member since 5/05 13673 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
My father watches Lily every day now, and we pay him a weekly amount to do it. He had to give up his job to do that though, so it would be unfair of us not to pay him.
I understand not paying grandparents to watch the child once in a while, but I think they should be given something if it's a full-time job. Watching babies is hard work!!
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| Posted 11/21/07 5:21 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by nferrandi
I would really tell her just what Shawn said, that the caregivers at daycare are trained and certified and unless she plans on the same training, then she can't expect the same payment.
And if you do wind up paying her a decent amount of money, then you have every right to treat her as an employee. You can tell her that you do not want her running errands with your child, you expect her to take DC to library programs, gymboree, etc... and to not only watch her but interact with her the way daycare would. If she wants the freedom of being grandma and taking DC along wherever she goes, then you should not pay her the same as a "professional."
I completely agree. Not to mention she better hand over her SS# because a portion of that money can be deducted out of your taxes. Another thing to consider is if you have a flexible spending account or, as in my husband's case, a union fund that you can get reimbursed for daycare, you're going to need her ss#. She should be prepared to claim that as income as well.
I do think they do deserve something if it's on a regular basis.
Message edited 11/21/2007 5:41:44 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/07 5:41 PM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by nferrandi
I would really tell her just what Shawn said, that the caregivers at daycare are trained and certified and unless she plans on the same training, then she can't expect the same payment.
And if you do wind up paying her a decent amount of money, then you have every right to treat her as an employee. You can tell her that you do not want her running errands with your child, you expect her to take DC to library programs, gymboree, etc... and to not only watch her but interact with her the way daycare would. If she wants the freedom of being grandma and taking DC along wherever she goes, then you should not pay her the same as a "professional."
I completely agree. Not to mention she better hand over her SS# because a portion of that money can be deducted out of your taxes. Another thing to consider is if you have a flexible spending account or, as in my husband's case, a union fund that you can get reimbursed for daycare, you're going to need her ss#. She should be prepared to claim that as income as well.
I do think they do deserve something if it's on a regular basis.
Ha! never thought of it that way but what the he!!
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| Posted 11/21/07 5:53 PM |
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LuvMyBoys
LIF Adult
Member since 4/07 927 total posts
Name:
MOMMY
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
If they are watching your child fulltime on a regular basis I don't see anything wrong with paying them. I think its a lot to ask of them with out paying them
But I would not pay them the same as daycare, maybe a little less.
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| Posted 11/21/07 10:59 PM |
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Disneygirl
Disney cruise bound!
Member since 5/05 8126 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Posted by nrthshgrl
I completely agree. Not to mention she better hand over her SS# because a portion of that money can be deducted out of your taxes. Another thing to consider is if you have a flexible spending account or, as in my husband's case, a union fund that you can get reimbursed for daycare, you're going to need her ss#. She should be prepared to claim that as income as well.
I do think they do deserve something if it's on a regular basis.
Excellent point. I think we all agree that it's totally fair to pay grandparents something fair for watching a child on a regular basis but if she's not willing to give you some sort of "family discount" than it hardly seems worth it. Seems more like she's got $$ in her eyes rather than you and your DC's best interest.
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| Posted 11/22/07 12:13 AM |
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MelToddJulia
Love my Family!
Member since 7/05 29064 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
If I needed them, my IL's and my parents would do it for free! Of course we would offer to pay them, but I know they wouldn't take it, they love watching there granddaughter.
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| Posted 11/22/07 12:45 AM |
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EmmaNick
*
Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name:
*
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
I think it's weird and I would tell them that you'll probably just go the daycare route since you can write a portion of it off in your taxes.
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| Posted 11/22/07 9:01 AM |
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Moehick
Ready for the sun!
Member since 5/05 30339 total posts
Name:
Properly perfect™
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
My father watches Kerri everyday we are working, he was retired before and so happy to have something to do. I have offered money but he refuses....if I was to pay him I would expect to give LESS than daycare or else no doubt she would be in daycare.
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| Posted 11/22/07 9:38 AM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
I would think it's a little odd.
First, they are your (or DH's parents), and I just can't imagine someone's parents asking you to pay them as much as you would pay daycare to watch their grandchild - part of being a parent/grandparent, is taking care of your family and extending yourself to help, at least, that's my perspective, and I certainly hope I maintain that perspective when Alex pushes out a little spiritmonster #2 out of her one day
Second, there are just sooooooooo many benefits to daycare, that I would only leave my child with a grandparent if there were an incentive - at daycare they socialize with so many different people, have so many toys and games, sing-along, yoga, sign language, vegetable garden, soccer, swimming, etc. The teachers dedicate themselves 100% to the children - there's no watching TV, no answering phone calls, no running errands, etc. The only way I would opt for having a grandparent watch my child, considering all the benefits of daycare, is if there was an incentive in terms of payment.
And, as others stated, the other added benefit of daycare is that, at least in our school, all the teachers are certified, know CPR and have at least a Bachelor's degree in EDUCATION. Unless your grandparent has the same kind of training, I don't see how (s)he can ask for the same amount of money.
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| Posted 11/22/07 9:46 AM |
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ChilisWife
God Bless America
Member since 5/05 3572 total posts
Name:
A.K.
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Not sure if anyone mentioned this, but day care center charges include certain costs for overhead and expenses - such as insurance, utilities, employee benefits, rent under leases, etc. Generally a grandparent won't have to pay those items so they shouldn't get exactly the same amount.
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| Posted 11/22/07 10:10 AM |
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Karebaby
Precious
Member since 10/06 5304 total posts
Name:
Karyn
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Well, let me start by saying that neither mine nor DH's parents would NEVER ask for a dime to watch the kids, even if it were full time.
That said, if they did want some sort of compensation, of course I would be willing to pay something reasonable. I wouldn't pay them what a daycare would get paid though. Grandparents should want to spend time with the kids. They shouldn't charge you what a daycare charges to watch strange kids that they aren't related to. Plus like another poster said, daycares are fully licensed and trained. If they want full compensation, they need to have all the qualifications that a daycare would offer.
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| Posted 11/22/07 10:52 AM |
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Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man
Member since 2/06 3235 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Answering this from a grandparent's perspective, I wouldn't never take a dime to take care of my grandchildren. I have them every day and love every minute of it. I have my own supplies and toys for when they are here. My daughter has offered, but, I would never take anything. Daycare is expensive and they are trying to save a huge expense. I don't mind helping out and I love having my "grandbabes" around.
Unless a grandparent absolutely, positively needs the money so survive, or if they left their job to watch the grandkids and they need the supplemental income, I don't see why they would not want to simply help out. If you feel the need to pay them something, fine, but, to expect a "salary" is, IMO ridiculous.
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| Posted 11/22/07 11:31 AM |
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MrsBumbleb
it's me
Member since 5/05 11234 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: what do you think about Grandparents wanting the same amount of money as daycare to watch your DC?
Message edited 11/25/2007 12:23:28 AM.
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| Posted 11/22/07 11:44 AM |
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