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Lina
My angel is finally here
Member since 5/10 2559 total posts
Name:
Lindsay
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Re: Elective C-Section
Posted by JenandMikey
I said it before on here and I'll say it again....why does it matter how a child gets into this world? As long as they are safe and healthy I don't know why it worries others ....either way vaginal or csection there can be many complications yes one is a surgery but the fact of the matter is that that doesn't make it any more risky ..,,,every pregnancy and delivery has its risks and honestly the way a baby comes into the world is up to her her dh and her obgyn and if all are on board then it shouldn't be an issue.....I had three sections first one was an emergency and the other two were elected bc I don't believe in the risks of vbacs for myself ....all three I was up the same day just a couple of hrs after the surgery and I stayed all 4nights and by the time I got home all three times I was fine to do practically every thing (.not driving ) my dh took off a wk but that was it and honestly I didn't need much help at all...and all I took was Motrin from my last day in the hospital on
You say that having a CS is not anymore risky than a vaginal birth but that is not true. Facts are that it is much more risky for the mother and child. Women who deliver via CS (planned- not emergency), are more than 2 times more likely to end up back in the hospital due to complications. Planned CS born babies are also twice as likely to be placed in the NICU for respiratory issues and also have a higher rate of childhood asthma. The list goes on and on.
For those who say to MYOB... This is my sister and best friend. I think I have every right to try to inform her of these things so that she can make an EDUCATED decision. That is a huge problem these days, people make many uneducated decisions. As long as she has all the facts and still decides to go for a CS then that is her call but I am still going to say something.
Edited to clarify that the stats I posted are for Planned CS, not emergency ones where there are complications.
Message edited 11/20/2013 3:03:56 PM.
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Posted 11/20/13 1:43 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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Jugglemom
LIF Adolescent
Member since 3/12 809 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
I did not want to have a vaginal birth - I really didn't. I don't see what all the hoopla was about. But still, I labored for 18 hours, pushed for 2 hours and ended up with a c-section.
I had a wonderful recovery. My doctor asked if I wanted a VBAC for my second and I said NO WAY. My recovery from my section was significantly less painful than labor and pushing.
If her FIL is an Obgyn what makes you think she doesn't know the facts? I doubt he would willingly choose to endanger his DIL and grandchild if he thought there was a medical risk.
I have several friends who are doctors (some obgyns) and they have actuall al chosen c-sections so go figure.
The fact is there are pros and cons to both.
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| Posted 11/20/13 1:53 PM |
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HappyWife515
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/09 406 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Elective C-Section
I had a vaginal birth with my first and tore and I was in pain for much longer than I was with my c section. I had always turned my nose up at c sections but it needed to be done (emergency) with my second, and my recovery couldn't have been better. I stayed the 4 days in the hospital and then had to travel back and forth to the hospital to visit my son in the nicu while taking care of my 2 year old also.
I understand your concern because I was the same way before I had a c section but she will be fine. If I ever go for number 3 c section all the way!
eta: my baby needed to be resuscitated right away after the cs and was in nicu for 11 days but it was not due to the fact that I had a cs. In fact if it wasn't for the cs he would have died. I know this is a completely different scenario than your sister choosing a cs but just pointing out that they aren't all bad. Your sister is lucky you care so much 
Message edited 11/20/2013 2:01:31 PM.
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| Posted 11/20/13 1:57 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Elective C-Section
Share your personal experience and voice your concerns in a respectful way. It honestly isn't any of your business to try to get involved any further than that, no matter what you think.
She has the ability and resources to do her own research and come to her own educated decisions. She is a grown adult.
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| Posted 11/20/13 1:57 PM |
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Lina
My angel is finally here
Member since 5/10 2559 total posts
Name:
Lindsay
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Elective C-Section
I just wanted to thank everyone for their opinions on both sides. I know some think I should MYOB but I am still going to say something and she can take it or leave it. I know she isn't really all that educated on the matter, she told me so herself. She basically said she doesn't want to know, just wants to have a CS and be done with it. I hope she at least weighs her options and makes an informed decision.
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| Posted 11/20/13 1:58 PM |
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lcherian
He is the reason!
Member since 2/06 2512 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
Im with you. If it was my sister, I would present all the info I could as to why an elective c section is not a good idea.
Message edited 11/20/2013 2:01:42 PM.
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| Posted 11/20/13 1:59 PM |
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MrsW2010
Mommy of two!
Member since 5/10 2202 total posts
Name:
Jill
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Re: Elective C-Section
i had a great c section experience, so i guessing she has only heard these great stories and not the terrible ones... if her doctor is allowing it there is nothing anyone else can do.
I tried to have a vaginal delievery and my body wouldn't let me... I hope she reconsiders..
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| Posted 11/20/13 2:01 PM |
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MrsA714
Baby #2 is here!
Member since 8/07 8806 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
Being that it is your sister, I see no harm in giving her your input or perhaps suggesting she do additional research before making a decision. In the end, she can choose to do what she wants with that information and it will be her choice to handle her pregnancy/delivery however she wants. If I had a sister, I would definitely say something. I mean, that's what family is for right? For giving unsolicited advice and butting in 
I have experienced both a vaginal delivery and c-section and I would do EVERYTHING in my power to avoid another c-section. But my recovery was God awful so...
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| Posted 11/20/13 2:06 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
I've had two and I don't know why anyone would ELECT to have one without medically needing one. It's MAJOR abdominal surgery. Having a baby vaginally, in the long run, is so much better..........more natural and way easier to recover from.
Both times I had one those with C-sections were in agony, myself included, and everyone in the maternity ward who delivered vaginally were up and around like normal.
BOTH of my C-sections were awful. I know some say it's easy to recover from but not me. Not at all. I had a god awful reaction to the spinal both times. I was in unbelievable, god awful pain the first few days after that literally brought me tears almost all day long. And the recovery takes some time. You're not getting around well for a while, it hurts to find a comfortable position to sleep because of the incision and you feel like hell.
Honestly, I think your sister is nuts. I would never choose to have a C-section. Never.
ETA - Both of my C's were scheduled, not emergency. They insisted my DD was going to be over ten pounds which is why I had the first one. I wish I didn't listen, she was so much smaller and I essentially had an unneeded C-section.
With my second I tried for a VBAC but my DS wasn't budging and they wouldn't let me go much past my due date because I had GD.
Message edited 11/20/2013 2:21:29 PM.
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| Posted 11/20/13 2:17 PM |
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wakemeup
Member since 10/13 1397 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
I had an elective c-section for medical reasons with #1, and my recovery was very easy. I didn't have much help either.
I don't really agree with having one for NO reason, but it's really her call, and if her OB supports it there isn't much else you can say. I would't keep harping on it though.
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| Posted 11/20/13 2:23 PM |
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NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!
Member since 5/11 10413 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
I don't think it's a matter of people saying MYOB. You can give your opinion. But your sister is an adult and it's ultimately her body, her baby and her decision.
Also the stats you give can be impacted because sometimes c-section babies are in distress before the c-section which is why there are complications afterwards.
Your original post sounded like you were concerned mostly because your sister wouldn't be able to care for the baby afterwards. I think a majority (not all, but a majority) of us who have had c-sections are telling you that we were fine to take care of our babies almost immediately afterwards.
You don't have to agree with our opinions, but you came on here asking for our opinions, so you can't get angry at us for sharing.
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| Posted 11/20/13 2:37 PM |
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Lina
My angel is finally here
Member since 5/10 2559 total posts
Name:
Lindsay
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Re: Elective C-Section
Posted by NYCGirl80
I don't think it's a matter of people saying MYOB. You can give your opinion. But your sister is an adult and it's ultimately her body, her baby and her decision.
Also the stats you give can be impacted because sometimes c-section babies are in distress before the c-section which is why there are complications afterwards.
Your original post sounded like you were concerned mostly because your sister wouldn't be able to care for the baby afterwards. I think a majority (not all, but a majority) of us who have had c-sections are telling you that we were fine to take care of our babies almost immediately afterwards.
You don't have to agree with our opinions, but you came on here asking for our opinions, so you can't get angry at us for sharing.
Just to clarify... those stats are based on Planned c-sections, not emergency ones due to complications. I really do appreciate everyone input and respect everyone's opinion... not angry at all.
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| Posted 11/20/13 3:02 PM |
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ShhhTTCin11
3 under 3?!
Member since 5/11 2229 total posts
Name:
Coleen
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Re: Elective C-Section
Posted by Pomegranate5
Share your personal experience and voice your concerns in a respectful way. It honestly isn't any of your business to try to get involved any further than that, no matter what you think.
She has the ability and resources to do her own research and come to her own educated decisions. She is a grown adult.
ITA. And for what it's worth, I think part of the reason why c-section babies in general have more issues is because usually, they are done after complications during labor.
My friend tore her urethra and literally almost tore from hole to hole during her vaginal delivery. I had a C and was up moving much faster than she was!
It's really a personal decision. I would approach it gently with her, if you feel the need to say something.
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| Posted 11/20/13 3:03 PM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Elective C-Section
Send her my way. If I told her about my labor and emergency C section she'd probably rethink!
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| Posted 11/20/13 3:15 PM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
Obviously you can't make her do anything, however, I do not understand this idea of "oh I don't want my vagina torn up, give me a c section." There are greater ramifications than picking an ice cream flavor. A CS is major abdominal surgery. I wanted a vaginal delivery so badly bc it's natural, less risky and healthier for everyone generally. But my DS was breach and I required two CS (both non elective). I would not recommend a CS for no good medical reason. My recoveries were difficult. I would present all the facts to your sister.
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| Posted 11/20/13 4:23 PM |
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CaMacho
Sisters :)
Member since 7/06 15112 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: Elective C-Section
I know some people like that, they just don't care about experiencing natural childbirth, the pain, etc. Everyone is different... I am the total opposite but there probably isn't much you can say to change her mind.
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| Posted 11/20/13 4:25 PM |
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sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!
Member since 1/07 9764 total posts
Name:
Tricia
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Re: Elective C-Section
Posted by Lina
Posted by JenandMikey
I said it before on here and I'll say it again....why does it matter how a child gets into this world? As long as they are safe and healthy I don't know why it worries others ....either way vaginal or csection there can be many complications yes one is a surgery but the fact of the matter is that that doesn't make it any more risky ..,,,every pregnancy and delivery has its risks and honestly the way a baby comes into the world is up to her her dh and her obgyn and if all are on board then it shouldn't be an issue.....I had three sections first one was an emergency and the other two were elected bc I don't believe in the risks of vbacs for myself ....all three I was up the same day just a couple of hrs after the surgery and I stayed all 4nights and by the time I got home all three times I was fine to do practically every thing (.not driving ) my dh took off a wk but that was it and honestly I didn't need much help at all...and all I took was Motrin from my last day in the hospital on
You say that having a CS is not anymore risky than a vaginal birth but that is not true. Facts are that it is much more risky for the mother and child. Women who deliver via CS (planned- not emergency), are more than 2 times more likely to end up back in the hospital due to complications. Planned CS born babies are also twice as likely to be placed in the NICU for respiratory issues and also have a higher rate of childhood asthma. The list goes on and on.
For those who say to MYOB... This is my sister and best friend. I think I have every right to try to inform her of these things so that she can make an EDUCATED decision. That is a huge problem these days, people make many uneducated decisions. As long as she has all the facts and still decides to go for a CS then that is her call but I am still going to say something.
Edited to clarify that the stats I posted are for Planned CS, not emergency ones where there are complications.
I agree word for word. If you compare a normal vaginal delivery vs. a c section (for non-emergency reasons) The C section is MORE risky.
Clearly a complicated vaginal birth is a reason for a section. But, to choose a section over a uncomplicated vaginal birth is choosing a more risky method to give birth. For the Mom and baby.
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| Posted 11/20/13 4:27 PM |
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Alexandra17
Keep It Positive
Member since 4/09 6262 total posts
Name:
Alexandra (ali)
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Elective C-Section
I know that you are worried for your sister but she is trying to make the best decision she can right now. Try to be supportive.
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| Posted 11/20/13 4:33 PM |
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IVFmiracle
Complete
Member since 12/12 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
Posted by NYCGirl80
It's her decision, so I think you can lend your opinion, but it's ultimately up to her. And if her dr is ok with it, then I don't know why you're so worried.
I had a c-section because DS was breach. DH was only home with me for 5 days and I didn't have any other help. I was fine. Yes, it's major surgery, but after the first 48 hours it's really not bad. There's pain, but nothing so unbearable that I couldn't care for DS. I was up and out of bed 12 hours after my surgery. So if she chooses to go ahead with the c-section, I do tend to think she will be fine at home.
I agree. It's her decision. You can tell her the facts as you know them, but the rest is her choice. I think an elective section is better than being forced into it for medical reasons.
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| Posted 11/20/13 4:56 PM |
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lynnd126
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 2630 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
I think it can go either way. TMI but from delivery I got a hemorrhoid so big and painful that I literally could barely walk or even sit comfortably for almost two weeks. Meanwhile my episiotomy healed in two days- honestly like it never even happened. I'm not comparing csection to an episiotomy, just saying that recoveries can vary..
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| Posted 11/20/13 5:01 PM |
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Kelly9904
Mommy to 2 amazing little boys
Member since 5/05 9306 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: Elective C-Section
I had 2 planned cs. First DS was nearly 10lbs. My dr and I decided to do a cs. Did I have to? No, it was my choice and I woudl make the same decision over again. I have never felt a contraction. (I was apparently having some with DS2 while I was waiting for my cs but I never felt them) but I am proud of "giving birth" to my sons. They are beautiful and perfect and neither spent a day in NICU or had any issues. DId my older DS have respiratory issues as a small child? Yes, however I myself grew up with childhood asthma so whose to say its because he was a cs baby. And my niece who was delivered via vaginal birth had the same issues until she was approx 4yo as well. PS at 6 he has not had one "asthma like" issue since he was 4.
Anyway I was up and walking around with both my kids the day after delivery. In fact with my second, I was up less than 12 hours later (delivered at 840pm) and with DS1 I was actually consoling a woman who was in severe pain after a v-birth. WIth my first DS i left the hosptial after 3 nights, my MIL came and stayed with us for the night to help. When DS woke up to be fed, I got up and fed him, and put him back to sleep and no one even knew he was awake. I didnt need nor did I want the help. DH was home for 2 weeks. WIth DS2 he was only less than a week.
Feel free to give your sister your 2 cents. But know that it wont make a difference. My SIL called me after finding out I scheduled a cs and she gave me hers, it was nice of her to give me her thoughts as she had had both v-birth and cs and had a baby the same size as my DS. But in the end I was content with my decision. I have never regretted it for a day!
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| Posted 11/20/13 5:03 PM |
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MrsA1012
love my little girl !
Member since 9/10 5777 total posts
Name:
Me
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Elective C-Section
She is choosing to have a MAJOR abdominal surgery that is not medically necessary. Anything that involves cutting into the abdominal area is a big deal and should not be taken lightly. She is an adult and ultimately has to make her own choice, but I see no harm in encouraging her to more research. Most honest doctors I know, encourage patients to avoid unnecessary invasive interventions because of potential for complications.
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| Posted 11/20/13 5:21 PM |
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TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!
Member since 8/08 7878 total posts
Name:
Mama mama mama....
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Re: Elective C-Section
There are definite risks to c-sections for moms, babies, and future pregnancies. It is major abdominal surgery and should not be undergone without a compelling medical reason. I personally think it's unethical for a doctor to schedule a section just because a patient asks.
Your sister might tell you to MYOB, or she might actually listen. A lot of it is in the approach. If you start off with, "I love you and I'm worried about you..." she's more likely to let you finish. But in the end, it's her call.
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| Posted 11/20/13 8:16 PM |
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Jacksmommy
My love muffin!
Member since 1/07 5819 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: Elective C-Section
Flame away but with my first I had an elective C-section that was not medically necessary. Honestly, I was already overdue, and my doctor presented the options of induction (where I wasn't even dilated or effaced yet) or C-section. I have heard horror stories about people laboring for hours and then still having a C-section and having to recover, so I chose to have a C-section. I felt it was a controlled situation and couldn't have gone smoother. I will definitely be having a C-section with my current pregnancy. I had many many many people try to talk me out of it and even told me that I was being a "horrible" future parent. I feel that I made the best decision for my body and my family. It is not anyone else's decision besides your sisters. I am sure she has weighed the options and made her own decisions!
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| Posted 11/20/13 9:13 PM |
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jewels
Stop and smell the flowers
Member since 7/06 1538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Elective C-Section
What are her reasons for wanting the elective C-section? Is she anxious about giving birth? I was so nervous about giving birth to my son that I actually felt relieved when my doctor finally decided on an emergency C-section to deliver my son. In retrospect I can't believe I felt that way. My C-section was traumatic for me and the recovery was difficult. I also felt sad afterwards that I didn't get to experience natural childbirth. Your sister might need you to gently point these possibilities out to her. Natural childbirth is clearly not without it's difficulties and risks, but I don't think a C-section should be seen as the easier option. In the end it is clearly her decision, but as her sister I see nothing wrong with you trying to talk to her about it.
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| Posted 11/20/13 10:10 PM |
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