Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Breastfeeding definitely gets easier! When I was exhausted and frustrated with my first daughter I felt like going to formula. I stuck it out and worked through it. I ended up nursing her until she was 18 months.

Call a lactation consultant, it will help. Try nursing her laying down so you can rest.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Posted by Ang-Rich

My experience was pretty much the same as you described. The last time that my son was on my berast was right before we left the hospital - never again. He cried - screamed really - once we got home. I admit that I pretty much gave up - I have to go back to work in July (which gives us 7 weeks together) and by then I would only be feeding from the breast in the morning and at night - all other times would pump so I just stopped and decided to pump. I called the pediatrician who told me not to be so hard on myself and to give formula in the meanwhile. I did that but continued to pump the breast milk. Now - 4 weeks later I feed him expressed breast milk and have built up enough of a supply to feed him BM all day every day for the last two weeks. When we started it was mostly formula. Once I had a two ounce bottle of BM I would give him that. Then my milk really came in and I was able to pump more than he was eating so I started storing it. Now he has BM with every feeding except before bed when I do give him formula to help him sleep longer. I only pump 4 oz at each time and that's what he drinks so usually in a day I am behind but I have the milk I stocked up on to help. Pumping is very hard - and demanding. DH has been a huge help. My last pump before bed - that milk stays out to feed him at night. DH will feed him and I will pump again. That milk is held for the next feeding. There are plenty of times where I just can't wake DH (I feel too bad since he works) so I feed the baby the bottle from the last pump and once I put him down I pump more.

I used to be really crazy about pumping every 3 hours but now I find I pump every 4 or even 5 hours depending on what's going on. I stopped putting so much stress on myself - I'll give him what I have and supplement with formula if need be. Otherwise it takes its toll on you.

For me - the most important part was getting him that breastmilk. I am okay with not having him on me - we still bond. My little man looks up at me while he eats and I talk to him and touch his cheek.We have our time together and DH has feeding time with him as well. It works for us although pumping is very demanding...you have to set your own expectations and not be hard on yourself.

Good Luck - please feel free to FM if you want to talk more about what I have been doing.

ETA: I didn't have a c-section so I can't begin to imagine how much more difficult that makes things. And as far as weight - DS was 8lbs 11oz when born, by the time we left the hospital he was about 8lbs 9oz. (only there for 36 hours). At the one week appt he was 8lbs 14oz and a week after that he was 9lbs 3oz!

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

It does get better and i wanted to give you and congrats!!

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Posted by MsMBV

I am sorry your first night was so rough.....

I had to pump & bottle fed DS for the first 2 weeks & I also had to supplement with formula as well. It worked like a charm & he gained all his weight back and then some by his 1 week visit, and another lb 2 weeks after that.

Luckily they noticed in the hospital that he was not getting enough from my milk (which was nearly non-existent since he was so early). I would let him suckle to get the colostrum, and then give formula to satisfy him. I'd pump in between the scheduled feedings to get my milk to let-down, and by the day I went home (5th day) I was pumping almost 2 oz every 2 - 3 hours, which was enough to practically eliminate formula. At that point I only needed to supplement with formula once or twice per day. By week 3 he was latching like a champ for 20 minutes at a time & even soothing himself to sleep "on the boob." Now at 5 weeks he is getting 4 oz from me every 3 hours during the day and every 4 hours overnight. I still pump 2 extra times during the day to have extra milk on hand in, just in case. I also have DH feed him at his 9pm feeding so I can get a solid 6 hours of sleep. (I take a nap at 7pm, after he has his 6 pm feeding & is burped & changed.)

Also I find he needs a bit more right before a growth spurt.

BF was so incredibly hard in the beginning, but thanks to some great help & advice from the gals here I stuck with it & now it is like I don't even think about it.

Good luck

ETA: Silly question, but can your DC breathe when latched. DS could not breathe b/c no matter how we positioned him, his nose got flattened & he would release the latch. Even if I held my skin out of the way it would cause him to release the latch. Maybe that is why she is having such a hard time?

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Posted by Smileyd17

I was in the same boat....I opted to not BF (that was me)....I couldnt for other reasons as well.

I just wanted to say that IT does get better and wanted to offer you

Welcome home and CONGRATS! Love to see pics.

ETA: You can call someone to help, A La Leche consultant. Try that. Might help.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

The ladies gave you some really great advice - so I have really nothing to add, but wanted to send you some supportive hugs.



Bottom line is - you do whatever works for you.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Well first, Congrats!!!! You got tons of great advice already so I don't have much to add. I just wanted to offer you hugs and let you know that it most certainly DOES get easier. I could never get DS to latch so I pumped and supplemented with formula.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

I can't add anymore advice but...

Congratulations

Like everyone said...it takes time and things do get better

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Oh Alicia, I also tried breastfeeding but she wouldn't latch and I couldn't find a comfortable spot to sit because of my stitches down there.

I gave up and just gave her formula.
Nobody will judge you if you feel like it's not for you.

It will all be okay, welcome to parenthood.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

congrats!!!

BFING was nothing but a challange for me for the first 8 weeks. It gets so much easier.

I remember one night being so engorged telling DH I could not do it anymore that we needed formula. He calmed me down and talked me out of it, plus it was the middle of the night and I gave all my samples away so I would not be tempted.

My advice is you have to believe in BM as a product. You are doing what's best for your baby. It gets sooooo much easier. I swear I use to break out in a rash when it was time for him to nurse on the left side...the pain was too much. Freaking flames of hell. Now, I look forward to nursing...it's downtime. I turn the tv on and just relax.

As a bfing mom, I want to offer you encouragement, a standing ovaltion for attempting it, and a shoulder to lean on if you can't continue. It's hard work at a very hard time in your life. Take care of you, if you are happy baby will be happy.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

congrats on your little girl...
It was hard for me at the begininng. I am SOO happy that i stuck with it though. I really thought about giving up but i didn't.I pumped in between sessions and 1 feeding a night my Husband would use the pumped milk and feed Him. INVEST in a Boppy pillow. i had a c-section also and that pillow was a life saver! Do what you feel is right. But just remember this - if you can last a1-2 weeks of BFing you will be able to do it for as long as you want. you should buy Breast cream the lanison stuff. if ;you have any questions please FM me. I know that it is hard but weather you decided to stop or not you will know what is right for you.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

also, with my csection...I had one chair that was my BFing chair. I could not do it in rocking chair, bed, couch...just one chair. Try different places to feed her...its such a crazy time...all this, plus you were sliced open.

ETA: josh was born 9.7. I brought him home from the hospital weighing 8.9. we were on weight watch for a while. The weight will come back on, keeping pumping and attempting the latch. If I waited till he was too hungry, he would never latch right, I would put him on just as he was waking.

Message edited 6/26/2007 5:26:12 PM.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Posted by HappyAnon
I could have written thsi myself....2 years ago! So I promise, it DEF gets better!!!

I BF'd for a week b4 I realized, it wasn't for me. I too had a C-section and the recovery of an emergency and painful C-section is not easy!! I lived it!! The first few weeks are tough, the transition is hard but it ABSOLUTELY gets easier!!! Do what makes you feel better, b/c if you are unhappy, so will the baby. Don't let anyone tell you what you are doing is wrong! If you can continue to BF, great, if not, formula is FINE!!!!!!!!!! Good luck and FM if you ever want to talk!

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

I hope you find the answer/solution that works best for you and Madison...

I'm an avid bottle feeder...even though DH was against it. Turns out our son wouldn't be able to breastfeed well/at all if I had tried because he's "tongue tied" and would have severe difficulty latching on. They said there would be no problems bottle-feeding, but I found that to not be so true. I had to throw out all the nipples and buy a faster "flow" type...he couldn't suck hard enough to get ANY milk! I also bottlefed my first and she was so healthy she didn't have a single cold until the age of 2! So, even if you end up giving up completely, I'm here to tell you that your daughter will still be strong and healthy.

And yes, sleep when she sleeps!

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

all I can say is I give you credit. after my c section I said I dont knwo how women BF after C sections cause I couldnt even hold him up alone iwthout the boppy I was so tired...and physically had to recover so much the first two weeks.

DO NOT feel bad if you cannot do it. Its not anything to be ashamed of.

I couldnt.

I hope it gets easier.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Posted by dm24angel

all I can say is I give you credit. after my c section I said I dont knwo how women BF after C sections cause I couldnt even hold him up alone iwthout the boppy I was so tired...and physically had to recover so much the first two weeks.

DO NOT feel bad if you cannot do it. Its not anything to be ashamed of.

I couldnt.

I hope it gets easier.

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

I was in the same boat, I had a c-section with Julia, and I was BF her, I had a LC help me in the hospital the 4 days I was there, but when I came home it was so exhausting to keep feeding her that way, and I wanted to give her formula just so I could get some sleep, but my DH was such a big help and got up with me, and really reminded me how good it is to BF her, and that it will get better in time. I'm so happy that I stuck to the BF, and once she got more on a schedule with feedings it was a lot easier! I suffered from the baby blues bad, and the first 2 weeks was tough, and BF made it worse cause of my hormones, but that eventually passed too and got much better, so hang in there!!

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Congrats! Sorry you are having such a hard time bf'ing.
I was so overwhelmed in the beginning and I formula fed. It will get better and a little easier....

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

Just wanted to say congratulations to you and welcome you to the parenting board..
I saw the pics of your DD and she is lovely !
I didn't even try to breastfeed, so I cannot offer any advice there. The other ladies have gave you wonderful suggestions as well. All I wiill say is HANG in there and just try to rest when Madison sleeps.. thats the only way to somewhat keep you going during the long nights, if you got sleep during the daytime!

It's so overwhelming those first few weeks , whether your BF of formula feed... ask for help when you can and remember it'll get easier once you get to know each other better

Re: Brand new mommy with lots of questions...

I remember feeling the same way like it was yesterday just by reading your post! The first night was horrible- she was so hungry and I definately wasn't making enough milk. I finally gave in too. We are still breastfeeding and supplementing 6 months later and I tried everything to increase my milk. I wish I just would have accepted it and moved on and been happy. She is!

Hang in there and see a lacation consultant if you can. They are a Godsend