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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by NervousNell
I'm going to be honest here, I don't want a village raising my child. I birthed her, she is mine. I'll raise her myself.
I don't want anyone else involved to be honest.
I don't even like asking people for help in my own family.
I always always hated that saying.
What village? This isn't the 1500's in some country town with wet nurses.
Leave me to raise mine, you raise yours.
If I need your help, I'll pay you like I did my daycare.
Also that isn't what the phrase means, it takes a village you choose the villagers. I don't have to let strangers get be part of my village bc they're nosy
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Posted 8/2/18 3:55 PM  |
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MC09
arrrghhh!!!!
Member since 2/09 5674 total posts
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by Straightarrow
Posted by NervousNell
I'm going to be honest here, I don't want a village raising my child. I birthed her, she is mine. I'll raise her myself.
I don't want anyone else involved to be honest.
I don't even like asking people for help in my own family.
I always always hated that saying.
What village? This isn't the 1500's in some country town with wet nurses.
Leave me to raise mine, you raise yours.
If I need your help, I'll pay you like I did my daycare.
Also that isn't what the phrase means, it takes a village you choose the villagers. I don't have to let strangers get be part of my village bc they're nosy
True, but if you scream for help because your child is in an emergency situation does the stranger that comes running not instantly become part of the village? Or the stranger that catches the kid before he falls in the well without having been invited into the village while mom takes selfies? or just anybody in general who's looking out. People on this thread would love my aunt lol. If she sees a kid wandering off from their parent or doing something that looks like they could hurt themselves she becomes their shadow, not interfering or getting close, just watching them from a distance until the parent comes back. She thinks she's their guardian angel ready to swoop in. Some might say she's part of the proverbial village even though nobody asked her to join. I imagine if she ever encountered some of the moms on this thread, they'd have a few choice words for her. 
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| Posted 8/2/18 4:13 PM |
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Adri
Joy!
Member since 5/05 3116 total posts
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A
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by Sash
Regardless I still wouldn't confront a parent and that was the point. And she was doing nothing wrong. People need to mind their business unless there is a real danger and a confrontation will make an impact. As Nell said, confronting a parent isnt going to make them say omg you are so right thanks goodness you pointed out what I purposely did. My hero, you're an angel.
ETA: why would the mom have to lie even of he was 10 its not a big deal? She had nothing to prove to a perfect stranger who was stalking her car.
This is the crux of it. Not whether leaving the kids alone was right or wrong, but saying something to the mom.
I’m a psycho about car seat safety. I would never go up to a mom and say “why, that child appears to be 23 months old. You know she should be rear facing.”
Yes. While I would never turn my child forward facing before 2, I see MANY people who do.
While I would never put my child in a booster at 4, I see MANY people who do.
While I would never leave my child unattended in a pool because she can swim, I see MANY people do.
But never in my wildest dreams would I approach a STRANGER who was doing any of those things and tell them that.
That was the point here.
Not whether we all think it's right or wrong to leave kids in a car.
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| Posted 8/2/18 7:33 PM |
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klingklang77
kraftwerk!
Member since 7/06 11487 total posts
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Völlig losgelöst
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by MC09
Posted by Sash
Posted by gina409
Posted by MC09
Are people really this thin-skinned and easily triggered? If you're doing right by your kids and some other parent has some commentary about the choices YOU made for YOUR kid who the fukc cares??? Why the need to be nasty?
Sometimes people THINK they're being helpful and usually people don't mean any harm. It wouldn't occur to me to flip out or be nasty to a stranger so easily.
This.
In the grand scheme this person was trying to help. Whether she should have approached or not can be debated but the judgement on her is horrendous
Maybe we should take the it takes a village approach more. A friendly smile. A mom *gasp* applauding another mom
We are becoming a society that has forgotten social skills and the overall option of being kind because we rather stay in our bubble and shut the world out
Jaded. Everyone has a scheme or ulterior motive. Everyone rather not get involved
We have proven that the biggest enemy of mothers is other mothers
Sorry I have great social skills and I don’t equate good social skills with going up to a stranger and questioning her parenting. Idc how nice a person said it she went up with the intention to say she was doing something wrong according to her ideas and values. How is that sociable? I have very thick skin but don’t need any stranger coming up to me to convince me of what they believe. That’s a little strong.
I guess we have different ideas of social skills.
Personally, I wouldn't go up to any stranger anywhere and say a word to them about anything unless their hair is on fire and even then I may be hesitant and contemplate saying anything in case they flip out and tell me I should mind my own business lol. But if a stranger came up to me to say they think my shoes suck and I could have done a better job picking shoes I'd just say "ok thanks" and I'd move it along and keep doing what I'm doing. But that's just me and everyone is different. People just seem really touchy these days.
I have to agree with this (general situations), but I’m introverted. I might give a side eye, though, or just wave my hand. I did that the other day on the train (someone mentioned something about me), and it worked surprisingly well.
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| Posted 8/3/18 5:00 AM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
20/20 must read this board 
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| Posted 8/3/18 9:48 PM |
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by MC09
Posted by Straightarrow
Posted by NervousNell
I'm going to be honest here, I don't want a village raising my child. I birthed her, she is mine. I'll raise her myself.
I don't want anyone else involved to be honest.
I don't even like asking people for help in my own family.
I always always hated that saying.
What village? This isn't the 1500's in some country town with wet nurses.
Leave me to raise mine, you raise yours.
If I need your help, I'll pay you like I did my daycare.
Also that isn't what the phrase means, it takes a village you choose the villagers. I don't have to let strangers get be part of my village bc they're nosy
True, but if you scream for help because your child is in an emergency situation does the stranger that comes running not instantly become part of the village? Or the stranger that catches the kid before he falls in the well without having been invited into the village while mom takes selfies? or just anybody in general who's looking out. People on this thread would love my aunt lol. If she sees a kid wandering off from their parent or doing something that looks like they could hurt themselves she becomes their shadow, not interfering or getting close, just watching them from a distance until the parent comes back. She thinks she's their guardian angel ready to swoop in. Some might say she's part of the proverbial village even though nobody asked her to join. I imagine if she ever encountered some of the moms on this thread, they'd have a few choice words for her.
Maybe I am far too literal, but no I wouldn't consider anyone like that part of my village for my child.
I was a single mom and my village was my parents, my babysitter (who was 16, the horror, lol), the aftercare at my son's school. Now it includes my SO, etc.
If I screamed for help and someone helped me, they're a kindly stranger, or whatever. Then they're gone. That isn't part of my village
Sorry for the off topic, lol
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| Posted 8/6/18 4:00 PM |
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| Pages: << 5 6 7 [8] |
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