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CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

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jellybean78
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by nrthshgrl

I understand where you're coming from.
Ultimately I blame Adam Lanza.

I understand her wanting to get her socially awkward son something to feel good about himself but shooting guns? Never.

If this was pre-Columbine, pre-kids going to school & shooting their bullies, I'd think differently. She should have known better.



I agree. I don't think putting deadly weapons in the hands of a mentally unstable person is the way to build self esteem. Seems pretty common sense to me.

Posted 12/18/12 12:52 PM
 
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Goobster
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

I blame her more than anyone. She had a son with issues, she took him to target practice and supplied him with weapons that she did not secure. She is entirely at fault IMO and I am sorry she isnt here to face the wrath.

Posted 12/18/12 12:52 PM
 

BellaRock
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Karen

Posted by LadyBug1209

I feel the same way...

If your son was that mentally ill and unstable, why on earth would you have SEVERAL guns within his reach? That is just a recipe for disaster.



Bingo!

I have zero sympathy for this woman and have no qualms placing blame on her.

Even if she wanted to deny any issues to the outside world, how she could keep such powerful weapons unsecured in a house with a mentally ill child is beyond me.

ETA: Numerous people have cited that she knew Adam had issues, so this is not simply a case of her denying her son had issues.



Exactly!! I blame her too. She knew her son was mentally ill and yet still allowed guns in her home. Still allowed him to learn how to shoot them.

Ok, she probably never thought this could happen BUT she gave him all the steps to put this kind a plan in place.

Posted 12/18/12 12:56 PM
 

Onemoretime
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Yes, She is to blame. Where is the father in this? Did he abandon his kids? If so, he is very much to blame. Moreso than her. Is it true he was autistic?

This is the fault of the entire Immediate family. The mom always gets blamed, but if she was a single mom of an autistic child, where was dad?

Posted 12/18/12 1:09 PM
 

Pumpkin1
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

There is lots of speculation, but no definitive facts yet. Clearly, he must have been mentally ill because you don't do what he did otherwise. However, we do not know that the guns were unsecured. He could have picked a lock, stolen the key, etc.

Posted 12/18/12 1:10 PM
 

MissMeliss
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by LadyBug1209

I feel the same way...

If your son was that mentally ill and unstable, why on earth would you have SEVERAL guns within his reach? That is just a recipe for disaster.



This is exactly how I feel.

A neighbor who used to babysit the gunman when he was younger said his mother (nancy Lanza) told him to "never turn your back on him." WHY have all these guns in a home where there is a person like this? I'm sorry, but in my eyes SHE is to blame.

Posted 12/18/12 1:13 PM
 

Ayne11
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Until Adam Lanza's father speaks (if he ever will) I cannot help but blame Nancy Lanza. Your son is not well, you keep multiple weapons in the house and readily accessible, and you take him shooting?!? "Gain respect" is such a bull shit excuse.

YOUR SON SHOT YOU IN THE FACE MANY TIMES. Not that any kind of shooting is okay, but to the face is indicative of so much anger and hatred towards that person it really makes me so sad.

Also, is it true he had intentions of going to the middle school next then the HS?

Posted 12/18/12 1:16 PM
 

Merf99
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Even if he was undiagnosed as mentally ill, there was a news report with his old babysitter, who said that Adam's mother told him never ever to turn his back on Adam, even for a second.

To me - she knew he has severe issues!

Posted 12/18/12 1:21 PM
 

Ltdentway99
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

It's the dad's fault too! He left the family knowing his son mentally sick. Apparently, the whole town knew the mom had guns. So, he must have known. With all the money the dad made (a million a year) you would think they could get their son the best mental health treatment possible.

Also, no one wants to talk about the ACLU. They pushed for it to be illegal in CT for anyone to be involuntarily locked up in a mental institution. So, even if the parents wanted to lock him up, they couldn't against his will.

Posted 12/18/12 1:21 PM
 

Pomegranate5
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

After the fact it seems obvious that she shouldn't have had those guns within his reach. But who's to say he wouldn't have gotten weapons all on his own?

If every parent could foresee or predict the evil things their kids might eventually do we would never have serial killers, or any type of mass shootings, etc. As a mother myself I believe that no one loved him as much as she did and that in her heart she did not believe this would happen. Things are always clearer in retrospect.

Ultimately Adam Lanza is responsible for killing those people and he was probably going to do what he did no matter what.Chat Icon

Posted 12/18/12 1:24 PM
 

chanmar
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

How off could he have been..He still knew enough to wear bullet proof vests, and smash his hard drive..This was pretty thought out, not just a quick angry burst!

Posted 12/18/12 1:27 PM
 

Otherme
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

i understand wanting to place blame somewhere for this horrific tragedy

but people throwing things around like - he was mentally ill, mentally unstable, Asbergers/Autism, he should have been locked up, his parents had $$ so he should have 'gotten help', she should have known.. it's all speculation based upon hearsay and rumors. There have been no official statements regarding motive or what his mental health history truly was (as far as i know).
We don't know what was going on in that family and the truth is we may never really know.

So all of this finger pointing is fruitless. I get it, i really do, but it doesn't accomplish anything other than perpetuate gossip and rumors
Chat Icon

Posted 12/18/12 1:28 PM
 

jams92

Member since 1/12

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CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

i can agree with you 1000%!!! yes i read that article "i am adam lanzas mother" and it did give me a new perspective, however when you know you have a child with mental illness you dont teach him to shoot nor do you keep guns readily available in your house!!!
my dad lives out of state and loves to go shooting...but every single gun is locked in a safe at his house that only he can access.

Posted 12/18/12 1:29 PM
 

MsSissy
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by nraboni

Please read this I am Adam Lanza's Mother

Mental Illness is a taboo subject, especially in higher income families. I cannot speak for his mother nor am I defending her in any way but maybe she didn't know what to do or how to handle it. Maybe the "taboo" of it had her in denial.



I agree with this till it comes to having all those guns in the house. AND taking him shooting. That's where I blame her.

Posted 12/18/12 1:30 PM
 

Jugglemom
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by PeasandCarrots

I understand where you are coming from, and why you feel this way OP. I just want to say that nobody has said he had a mental illness and it has only been reported she knew something was wrong. That is all. There is no indication that she believed he was violent or dangerous. I also want to say from what I have read it sounds more like he may have had Autism or Aspergers which is a developmental disorder and not a mental illness. I also want to add that having Autism doesn't mean you are violent. I say all of this because it is important to remember that HE pulled the trigger. His mother was a victim of murder. Like I said I understand what you feel and I agree on some levels, but we just don't, I feel, have enough information to point any fingers. I get frustrated because it almost seems like in our culture we try to find fault in everybody or thing BESIDES the actual person. His mother is to blame for having registered legal guns, the system is to blame for being broken, we don't do enough to help people who need it, we ignored the wrning signs and so on.......where is the statement that says the MAN killed 27 people and at the end of the day HE pulled the triggers and took lives.



I completely agree! We know now that he obviously had some really dark things going on but there is no indication that she ever believed him to be violent or a threat to anybody. By all accounts, he had aspbergers and displayed many of the characteristics of that disorder none of which are a particular propensity towards violence. From what I have read she was a devoted mother who was even considering moving cross country to enroll him in a university for special needs students.

I think if you have a typically functioning child who all of a sudden changes then you know some thing is up. But, it seems that he often withdrew into himself, so if he did that in the days and weeks leading up to this horrendous act she may not have thought anything was different.

The investigation may come up with something different but for now, the only person I blame is him.

Posted 12/18/12 1:37 PM
 

Pumpkin1
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Merf99

Even if he was undiagnosed as mentally ill, there was a news report with his old babysitter, who said that Adam's mother told him never ever to turn his back on Adam, even for a second.

To me - she knew he has severe issues!



This schmuck is looking for his 15 minutes of fame. I give no weight to anything to yokel has to say.

Posted 12/18/12 1:38 PM
 

BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre

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Mrs. B

Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Goobster

I blame her more than anyone. She had a son with issues, she took him to target practice and supplied him with weapons that she did not secure. She is entirely at fault IMO and I am sorry she isnt here to face the wrath.



This 100%

Sorry, I have no sympathy for her.

Many people have said how unsocially awkward he was and that it was obvious something was wrong. How could his own family not have known that to get help.

Then to add to it you have a shiit load of guns in your home where he could get his hands on them AND you take him to learn how to shoot them????!!!! Are you fuccking kidding me?? That is so irrresponsible on so many levels.

She knew he had issues - so many people confirmed that she was aware of it and yet she still thought having guns around was the right thing to do?

I don't buy she wanted to protect herself...get a fuccking guard dog.

I am so bitter and angry over this!!!!Chat Icon

Posted 12/18/12 1:41 PM
 

Karen
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Pumpkin1

Posted by Merf99

Even if he was undiagnosed as mentally ill, there was a news report with his old babysitter, who said that Adam's mother told him never ever to turn his back on Adam, even for a second.

To me - she knew he has severe issues!



This schmuck is looking for his 15 minutes of fame. I give no weight to anything to yokel has to say.



Wow, how do you know he's a schmuck? Do you know him?

Multiple people have come forward with similar stories, including a former club advisor.

Posted 12/18/12 1:46 PM
 

stinger
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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

I think people hating her is exactly WHY he killed her. He didn't want to her to have to live with people hating her like the Columbine parents had to.

Posted 12/18/12 1:50 PM
 

Pumpkin1
LIF Adult

Member since 12/05

3715 total posts

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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Karen

Posted by Pumpkin1

Posted by Merf99

Even if he was undiagnosed as mentally ill, there was a news report with his old babysitter, who said that Adam's mother told him never ever to turn his back on Adam, even for a second.

To me - she knew he has severe issues!



This schmuck is looking for his 15 minutes of fame. I give no weight to anything to yokel has to say.



Wow, how do you know he's a schmuck? Do you know him?

Multiple people have come forward with similar stories, including a former club advisor.



I don't know him, but I think he's a schmuck because he has given numerous interviews (for which I am sure he was paid) before these babies were even buried. He lives in California, but felt the need to reach out to the media to tell his story. Please, IMO, he's a schmuck.

Posted 12/18/12 1:56 PM
 

MsSissy
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39159 total posts

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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by Jugglemom

Posted by PeasandCarrots

I understand where you are coming from, and why you feel this way OP. I just want to say that nobody has said he had a mental illness and it has only been reported she knew something was wrong. That is all. There is no indication that she believed he was violent or dangerous. I also want to say from what I have read it sounds more like he may have had Autism or Aspergers which is a developmental disorder and not a mental illness. I also want to add that having Autism doesn't mean you are violent. I say all of this because it is important to remember that HE pulled the trigger. His mother was a victim of murder. Like I said I understand what you feel and I agree on some levels, but we just don't, I feel, have enough information to point any fingers. I get frustrated because it almost seems like in our culture we try to find fault in everybody or thing BESIDES the actual person. His mother is to blame for having registered legal guns, the system is to blame for being broken, we don't do enough to help people who need it, we ignored the wrning signs and so on.......where is the statement that says the MAN killed 27 people and at the end of the day HE pulled the triggers and took lives.



I completely agree! We know now that he obviously had some really dark things going on but there is no indication that she ever believed him to be violent or a threat to anybody. By all accounts, he had aspbergers and displayed many of the characteristics of that disorder none of which are a particular propensity towards violence. From what I have read she was a devoted mother who was even considering moving cross country to enroll him in a university for special needs students.

I think if you have a typically functioning child who all of a sudden changes then you know some thing is up. But, it seems that he often withdrew into himself, so if he did that in the days and weeks leading up to this horrendous act she may not have thought anything was different.

The investigation may come up with something different but for now, the only person I blame is him.



I understand where you're both coming from.
But what I'm wondering is do you think he would've passed a test to get a permit on his own? From what is being said I don't think he would have. That alone should've been reason enough not to have all those guns in house house. Or at the least under lock and key.
And IMO anyone who did what he did, has some type of mental illness. No sane person goes in and kills 20 children or any innocent victims.

Posted by stinger

I think people hating her is exactly WHY he killed her. He didn't want to her to have to live with people hating her like the Columbine parents had to.



Interesting.
Never thought of that...

Message edited 12/18/2012 1:59:42 PM.

Posted 12/18/12 1:58 PM
 

MsKlutz
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Member since 9/12

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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

The mother in the article "I am Adam Lanza's Mother" knows her son is dangerous and mentions hiding all the knives and sharp objects. That just seems to be common sense.

I just don't understand Adam Lanza's mother and why she had guns that were at all accessible to a mentally ill individual living in her house. For that reason I feel she is partly to blame. I am usually all about not blaming anyone but the person who committed the crime but I really think she should have known better.

Posted 12/18/12 1:59 PM
 

BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre

Member since 5/05

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Mrs. B

Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by PeasandCarrots

I understand where you are coming from, and why you feel this way OP. I just want to say that nobody has said he had a mental illness and it has only been reported she knew something was wrong. That is all. There is no indication that she believed he was violent or dangerous. I also want to say from what I have read it sounds more like he may have had Autism or Aspergers which is a developmental disorder and not a mental illness. I also want to add that having Autism doesn't mean you are violent. I say all of this because it is important to remember that HE pulled the trigger. His mother was a victim of murder. Like I said I understand what you feel and I agree on some levels, but we just don't, I feel, have enough information to point any fingers. I get frustrated because it almost seems like in our culture we try to find fault in everybody or thing BESIDES the actual person. His mother is to blame for having registered legal guns, the system is to blame for being broken, we don't do enough to help people who need it, we ignored the wrning signs and so on.......where is the statement that says the MAN killed 27 people and at the end of the day HE pulled the triggers and took lives.



Honestly, do you think a SANE person could do what he did?

What he did was confirmation enough...it doesn't need to be written or diagnosed!

Posted 12/18/12 2:06 PM
 

Jugglemom
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Member since 3/12

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Re: CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

Posted by BriBri2u

Posted by PeasandCarrots

I understand where you are coming from, and why you feel this way OP. I just want to say that nobody has said he had a mental illness and it has only been reported she knew something was wrong. That is all. There is no indication that she believed he was violent or dangerous. I also want to say from what I have read it sounds more like he may have had Autism or Aspergers which is a developmental disorder and not a mental illness. I also want to add that having Autism doesn't mean you are violent. I say all of this because it is important to remember that HE pulled the trigger. His mother was a victim of murder. Like I said I understand what you feel and I agree on some levels, but we just don't, I feel, have enough information to point any fingers. I get frustrated because it almost seems like in our culture we try to find fault in everybody or thing BESIDES the actual person. His mother is to blame for having registered legal guns, the system is to blame for being broken, we don't do enough to help people who need it, we ignored the wrning signs and so on.......where is the statement that says the MAN killed 27 people and at the end of the day HE pulled the triggers and took lives.



Honestly, do you think a SANE person could do what he did?

What he did was confirmation enough...it doesn't need to be written or diagnosed!



Obviously not, but no evidence has been presented that he was violent beforehand or that his mother felt that he was violent. He may or may not have been - we don't know that yet. I personally do nt feel comfortable lodging blame at a dead woman without knowing the truth.

Posted 12/18/12 2:12 PM
 

LotsaLuv
Us

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F

CT shooting..god I'm not looking to start drama..but

The only things I have heard about Adam Lanza are that he was
1. Home Schooled
2. Anti Social
3. Never left his house
4. Was in music classes
5. Was a vegan b/c he didn't want to hurt animals (this is what I heard last night)

I don't think his mother knew he was as far gone as he was. She told a friend she felt she was losing him. I doubt she thought she was losing him where he would shoot up 20 6 & 7 year olds in a school. She probbably thought he was facing a deep depression.

I know many people who have battled depression, none of them have ever said they had thoughts of murdering people.

He also went to buy a gun a couple days before and was denied. if her guns were so out in the open and ready for use, then why would he go buy his own? I don;t think she should have had the type of guns she did in her home, but I also don;t think she ever thought in a million years her son would do such a thing.

No one interviewed said this kid had a violent history, everyone says the same thing, he was quiet.

There are soooooo many people in this world that fit the description of him above, I don't believe anyone would have even classified him as mentally ill, from the facts that are out today about him.

Posted 12/18/12 2:16 PM
 
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