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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Question - specifically to create drama...
Why is it that if someone says something negative about someone else are they considered to be mean, nasty, b*tchy or some other negative?
Does it ever occur to people that the negative thing may either be true or just that persons opinion?
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Posted 8/7/07 11:36 PM  |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Gertyrae
Why is it that if someone says something negative about someone else are they considered to be mean, nasty, b*tchy or some other negative?
Does it ever occur to people that the negative thing may either be true or just that persons opinion?
WHY would you say that? (I was trying to be negative as a wiseazz but that is all I could come up with).
I'm ok with negative unless it's dead wrong negative than I will fight it to the bone. 
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:40 PM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
It happens alot on here. I think that sometimes people will post how they love something someone posts just to be nice. Or because they are friends with that person. Instead of saying what they really feel.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:44 PM |
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neenie
Member since 5/05 22351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Gertyrae
Why is it that if someone says something negative about someone else are they considered to be mean, nasty, b*tchy or some other negative?
Does it ever occur to people that the negative thing may either be true or just that persons opinion?
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
or, if they introduce a little bit of REALITY to the conversation, they're mean and insensitive? 
I've said it before, and i'll say it again... this is the REAL world.. not a montessori school! You don't get pats on the back just because you know how to wipe your a$$ correctly 
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:46 PM |
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nyteacher13
Three Under Four!!! :-)
Member since 8/06 6405 total posts
Name:
~ THERESA ~
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by neenie
Posted by Gertyrae
Why is it that if someone says something negative about someone else are they considered to be mean, nasty, b*tchy or some other negative?
Does it ever occur to people that the negative thing may either be true or just that persons opinion?
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
or, if they introduce a little bit of REALITY to the conversation, they're mean and insensitive?
I've said it before, and i'll say it again... this is the REAL world.. not a montessori school! You don't get pats on the back just because you know how to wipe your a$$ correctly
 
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:47 PM |
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Shorty
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Member since 5/05 30390 total posts
Name:
really
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by neenie
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
or, if they introduce a little bit of REALITY to the conversation, they're mean and insensitive?
I've said it before, and i'll say it again... this is the REAL world.. not a montessori school! You don't get pats on the back just because you know how to wipe your a$$ correctly
w
t
f
i never got any pats for that 
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:49 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I've been on these boards a long time...and I just don't get it. It always amazes me.
I know the truth hurts, but jumping on someone who speaks it isn't the answer either.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:49 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Shorty
Posted by neenie
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
or, if they introduce a little bit of REALITY to the conversation, they're mean and insensitive?
I've said it before, and i'll say it again... this is the REAL world.. not a montessori school! You don't get pats on the back just because you know how to wipe your a$$ correctly
w
t
f
i never got any pats for that
PS if you cant wipe your azz right, please don't take your hand and pat MY back
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:50 PM |
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mommy2bella
Where does time go?
Member since 12/05 9747 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by IrishTracy
It happens alot on here. I think that sometimes people will post how they love something someone posts just to be nice. Or because they are friends with that person. Instead of saying what they really feel.
this is what drives me bananas...sometimes people need to polish off the bull-sh!t and post what they really, really feel....for real.
It ain't always pretty, and you may not be the top voted queen of LIF, but I find that honesty is what this is all about. Just like I wouldn't let me bf walk out of a bathroom with toilet paper on her shoe, or talk to a hot guy with her fly open...let me know if my color choices can use help, if having a kid CIO at 6 weeks works, what goes good with a certain fish...etc I don't take them as gospel but I have gotten so much straightforward advice her...you just gotta cut through the bs sometimes.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:50 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
BTW...I didn't go to a Montessori School so maybe that's why I CAN handle the truth!!
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:50 PM |
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neenie
Member since 5/05 22351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Shorty
w
t
f
i never got any pats for that
maybe cuz you don't do it correctly? 
OH
DIP!
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:51 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
For me it depends on what's negative & how it's done. I don't qualify pointing out inconsistencies to be negative. I consider name calling or repeated snotty comments to be bitchy.
I don't think everyone needs get along all of the time. We are different people with differences of opinion.
I do think that there are many better ways to go about things & often people don't chose to use those ways because there are those who like to incite more drama whether it's because they're being urged on by others through background FMs or because they like drama themselves.
I, personally, don't need more stress in my life. Everyone has their own drama in their own life - whether it be finances, IF, high-risk pregnancies, ILs you want to strangle, bosses you can't stand & DHs that aren't supportive or worse. I think it's better to offer solutions than to character assault - even if it is true.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:53 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I also think it depends on how the negative is presented. If it is presented as fact that is one thing, but if it is presented in a slanderous way that's something completly different.
Also, I think sometimes people say negative things based on hearsay or things they heard from someone who heard it from someone and the game of telephone badly misconstrued the info.
Last but not least, on this particular web site there is a gang mentaility sometimes. I am guilty of being on BOTH sides of this. It's one thing when ONE person is saying it, but when five more chime in just to chime in.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:53 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I agree with you Kel, but A LOT of times, if you are blunt/blatent on this site (true or not) you are looked down on, or told that you are a drama starter/pot stirer.
It's almost a damned if you do and damned if you don't mentaility.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:56 PM |
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neenie
Member since 5/05 22351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Gertyrae
BTW...I didn't go to a Montessori School so maybe that's why I CAN handle the truth!!
ditto.
and, honestly, i'll always welcome harsh reality over phony reassurance anyday.
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| Posted 8/7/07 11:59 PM |
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mommy2bella
Where does time go?
Member since 12/05 9747 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by DebG
I agree with you Kel, but A LOT of times, if you are blunt/blatent on this site (true or not) you are looked down on, or told that you are a drama starter/pot stirer.
It's almost a damned if you do and damned if you don't mentaility.
I guess I need a big old spoon for my pot then....it is what it is sometimes.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:14 AM |
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MissJones
I need a nap!
Member since 5/05 22136 total posts
Name:
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Gertyrae
Why is it that if someone says something negative about someone else are they considered to be mean, nasty, b*tchy or some other negative?
Does it ever occur to people that the negative thing may either be true or just that persons opinion?
Maybe because the truth hurts and the reality of a situation can really suck? Nobody wants to be shown the truth. And sometimes nice doesn't work.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:27 AM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by mommy2bella
I guess I need a big old spoon for my pot then....it is what it is sometimes.
Word...maybe we can buy a set of spoons and spli them?
I get judged alll the time for calling it like I see it.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:31 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by Gertyrae
I've been on these boards a long time...and I just don't get it. It always amazes me.
I know the truth hurts, but jumping on someone who speaks it isn't the answer either.
perhaps it's because there is a way to speak the truth so it doesn't cut into someones skin, and a way that does more harm than good.
but that in and of itself is totally subjective.
in the past I've posted my opinion on things that the OP at the time felt was insensitive or maybe just too harsh. Since my intention is not to hurt the person, I have both apologized and edited my posts (provided it was brought to my attention.)
I guess it boils down to how the OP feels, and even in the real world, some people are more sensitive than others...we can either take that into consideration and modify the way we answer them for their sake...or we can choose not to.
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:38 AM |
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CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I think that basically, we are all supposed to "play nice" here. And what happens is a lot of times, people speak their minds, not necessarily to be mean, but to raise a point. And because we are not sitting across from that person, it can be totally taken out of context, from which drama ensues. That's how I see it.
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:41 AM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I think there is a difference between stating an opinon and attacking someone else's opinion or views....lately things have gotten out of control IMO
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:41 AM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
my motto on here, is that if I have nothing nice to say, I won't post
unless Boosh is asleep of course
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:44 AM |
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Superkat
More a stranger than a friend
Member since 5/06 9730 total posts
Name:
K
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I think there are certain people who thrive on creating drama. Sometimes it is hidden within a request for assistance and other times it is just a "high and mighty" answer that is offensive. Either way, I am pretty good at spotting the people who are just looking to spice up their boring life with drama. Let's just say they aren't on MY friends list.
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:47 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
I happen to think though, that any "relationship" needs a good fight once and a while
like we have discussed before, I am not one really to hold a grudge.
I also don't really post anything on here that I find too private or that I know will incite my azz into a frenzy.
any issues or problems with my dh or family is pretty much off limits, b/c I am fiercely protective of them...even when they are clearly in the wrong....I just can't abide by anyone bashing them but me
and IRL as on here, I generally have no hair on my tongue...but I am also a fairly kind person for the most part, and I dont' wish anyone harm or ill will...as I am sure is the case for most people.
context and how the tone is perceived is key, as always...and it's so hard to figure it out on the website...
I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but I am also made of some pretty thick skin.
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:50 AM |
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4ForMe
:)
Member since 11/05 5666 total posts
Name:
Barbara
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Re: Question - specifically to create drama...
Posted by DebG
Last but not least, on this particular web site there is a gang mentaility sometimes. I am guilty of being on BOTH sides of this. It's one thing when ONE person is saying it, but when five more chime in just to chime in.
Absolutely! I have only been on LIF for a short time compared to most of you, but I do find the "gang mentaility" annoying.
Message edited 8/8/2007 10:52:52 AM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 10:51 AM |
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