Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by Oldusernewname

Posted by MarisaK




but honestly, I'm SURE i'll get flamed for this but it's true (at least in my circle) a lot (not ALL, but a lot) of those women breastfed just to SAY they did it, as a personal acomplishment - NOT b/c they enjoyed it, or 'bonded' any differently with their baby - but now it's a badge of honor "OH I BF'd for X amount of time, I struggled through the first 3 weeks when I was SO miserable and didn't sleep AT ALL and blah blah blah ......." Great, congratulations.

.

Really ? I'm sorry but this is the silliest thing I ever heard, sounds like something a bitter person would say. sorry.
I truly I can't imagine any mother breastfeeding just so they can say they did it, to brag about it.
Maybe I'm wrong...

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by maybebaby

Posted by Oldusernewname

Posted by MarisaK




but honestly, I'm SURE i'll get flamed for this but it's true (at least in my circle) a lot (not ALL, but a lot) of those women breastfed just to SAY they did it, as a personal acomplishment - NOT b/c they enjoyed it, or 'bonded' any differently with their baby - but now it's a badge of honor "OH I BF'd for X amount of time, I struggled through the first 3 weeks when I was SO miserable and didn't sleep AT ALL and blah blah blah ......." Great, congratulations.

.

Really ? I'm sorry but this is the silliest thing I ever heard, sounds like something a bitter person would say. sorry.
I truly I can't imagine any mother breastfeeding just so they can say they did it, to brag about it.
Maybe I'm wrong...

I kind of get what MarisaK is saying...maybe its not so much for bragging rights though, as opposed to making yourself do something you don't really want to do because you're so afraid others will frown.

I know many women who started breastfeeding because they felt they were being bad mothers for not giving it a chance. My own cousin tortured herself to do it for almost one year and hated every minute. She admitted that every time she thought of formula she felt immense guilt because of everything she's been told about bf'ing being the best.

women are given a ridiculous amount of pressure to BF these days. It's one thing to cite benefits. It's another to hear it constantly. I pretty much FF my boys and loved it. It's a personal thing but no one should be made to feel bad

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by maybebaby

Posted by Oldusernewname

Posted by MarisaK




but honestly, I'm SURE i'll get flamed for this but it's true (at least in my circle) a lot (not ALL, but a lot) of those women breastfed just to SAY they did it, as a personal acomplishment - NOT b/c they enjoyed it, or 'bonded' any differently with their baby - but now it's a badge of honor "OH I BF'd for X amount of time, I struggled through the first 3 weeks when I was SO miserable and didn't sleep AT ALL and blah blah blah ......." Great, congratulations.

.

Really ? I'm sorry but this is the silliest thing I ever heard, sounds like something a bitter person would say. sorry.
I truly I can't imagine any mother breastfeeding just so they can say they did it, to brag about it.
Maybe I'm wrong...

I kind of get what MarisaK is saying...maybe its not so much for bragging rights though, as opposed to making yourself do something you don't really want to do because you're so afraid others will frown.

I know many women who started breastfeeding because they felt they were being bad mothers for not giving it a chance. My own cousin tortured herself to do it for almost one year and hated every minute. She admitted that every time she thought of formula she felt immense guilt because of everything she's been told about bf'ing being the best.

women are given a ridiculous amount of pressure to BF these days. It's one thing to cite benefits. It's another to hear it constantly. I pretty much FF my boys and loved it. It's a personal thing but no one should be made to feel bad

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Maybe I am just a stone cold b!tch but I can't imagine anyone guilting me into doing ANYTHING I didn't want to do. I am actually baffled at the number of women who say.'well I tried BFing just to get others to stop hounding me about it, or I hated it but felt pressured by the nurses, my friends or my MIL".
Really?
Not one person DARED to question my choice to FF from day one. Not a nurse in the hospital, not a family member, nobody.
Maybe I give off a vibe or something. But if anyone did dare to question how I feed my daughter I would have torn them a new ahole. And that would have been the very last time they would have said a word. Trust me.
The thing is- you have to be confident in your decisions. You need to own them. And you can't bow or back down to anyone.
When you can do that, you will be able to do what YOU want and what is best for YOU. And there won't be an issue.
If that makes me a b!tch so be it. But I am a happy, confident b!tch!

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

With DS, I knew I wanted to at least try and BF when I gave birth- this bc my mom BF all of us and I figured I'd try it. I never really felt pressure to do so. I knew I always had FF as my back up option. Well, when I gave birth, my blood pressure skyrocketed to dangerous numbers so I was kept on a high IV dose of magnesium for days while my little guy was bonding with his nurses and ex DH. I was heartbroken and he was started on formula for those days. When I was well enough to care for him , I latched him and he BF. Turns out, formula feeding never changed my BF pattern. I ended up doing both until DS was about 6 months-- then went straight to FF.
my point is- do whatever you feel is right for you and keep that always as #1. People are always going to try and dictate what you should be doing in everything when you become a mom. Stay true to what you believe is right for your child. BF has many benefits but so does FF.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by maybebaby

Posted by Oldusernewname

Posted by MarisaK




but honestly, I'm SURE i'll get flamed for this but it's true (at least in my circle) a lot (not ALL, but a lot) of those women breastfed just to SAY they did it, as a personal acomplishment - NOT b/c they enjoyed it, or 'bonded' any differently with their baby - but now it's a badge of honor "OH I BF'd for X amount of time, I struggled through the first 3 weeks when I was SO miserable and didn't sleep AT ALL and blah blah blah ......." Great, congratulations.

.

Really ? I'm sorry but this is the silliest thing I ever heard, sounds like something a bitter person would say. sorry.
I truly I can't imagine any mother breastfeeding just so they can say they did it, to brag about it.
Maybe I'm wrong...

I kind of get what MarisaK is saying...maybe its not so much for bragging rights though, as opposed to making yourself do something you don't really want to do because you're so afraid others will frown.

I know many women who started breastfeeding because they felt they were being bad mothers for not giving it a chance. My own cousin tortured herself to do it for almost one year and hated every minute. She admitted that every time she thought of formula she felt immense guilt because of everything she's been told about bf'ing being the best.

women are given a ridiculous amount of pressure to BF these days. It's one thing to cite benefits. It's another to hear it constantly. I pretty much FF my boys and loved it. It's a personal thing but no one should be made to feel bad

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

I will BF in the beginning for colostrum purposes only. After that I will formula feed. I've gotten a lot of heat for it, and it made me feel horrible. People say "breast is best" because it makes the baby healthier and smarter etc etc. However, I wasn't breast fed nor was my husband, and knock on wood we are both very healthy. I also happen to consider us very intelligent. Science changes, 10 years from now we might hear that breast may not be best. who knows? There have been recent studies out that breast might have more advances for baby girls than boys. Does that mean that BF is bad for boys? Not necessarily. Studies also show that more breast fed babies are healthier than formula fed, but scientists are still trying to find out if it is the breast milk that is causing it or other factors (i.e. better hygiene). For me, I think BF is very challenging. I commend those that do it. Just because I choose not to BF doesn't mean I won't give the baby as much affection. In fact, the baby will also have the affection of his or her father that can contribute and feel apart of the bond. Also, I believe that if I were to BF I would need to have a very healthy diet which is difficult to do. In formula, I know they are getting the right amount of what they need daily. In the end, its a personal decision. Everyone needs to do whats best for them. I don't think people should be judged on their choice of parenting.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

And here I always thought this was a personal decision.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by Jbon630

And here I always thought this was a personal decision.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by Oldusernewname

Posted by MarisaK




but honestly, I'm SURE i'll get flamed for this but it's true (at least in my circle) a lot (not ALL, but a lot) of those women breastfed just to SAY they did it, as a personal acomplishment - NOT b/c they enjoyed it, or 'bonded' any differently with their baby - but now it's a badge of honor "OH I BF'd for X amount of time, I struggled through the first 3 weeks when I was SO miserable and didn't sleep AT ALL and blah blah blah ......." Great, congratulations.

.

Really ? I'm sorry but this is the silliest thing I ever heard, sounds like something a bitter person would say. sorry.
I truly I can't imagine any mother breastfeeding just so they can say they did it, to brag about it.
Maybe I'm wrong...

Those NOT Breastfeeding

I had all intentions to BF but after I had DD it just didn't happen. So be it. I did not feel guilty at all. It just wasn't meant to happen.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Posted by brownie

really bothers me that even formula cans tell you to BF????

I don't understand what is confusing about this. I only BF for a short time and pumped and felt guilty and when we have our next kid I will do whatever it takes to be more successful. That being said, it's a fact that BM is best so what they wrote on the can is giving the best advice.

Re: Those NOT Breastfeeding

Doesn't work out for everyone, it didn't for me. I had a terrible supply, I tried everything to get my supply up and when I pumped myself dry at 4w PP I was sad but relieved.

All the talk about how it is the best for your baby really got to me and made me feel terrible.

Ulitmately I think that it just another thing we as women use to make others feel less than. I have many friends who BF and do not push it on others or make those who FF feel bad about it but I have been in situations where people have said hurtful things about FF and how it isn't ideal and even harmful.

I came to terms with it, I was FF and I am a happy, healthy person with some intelligence

So much goes into nurturing and caring for your baby, BF is just one aspect.

I plan on trying again with #2 bc I do the benefit and certainly want my baby to get the colostrum but if it doesnt work I will try not to beat myself up over it.

Those NOT Breastfeeding

Crashing... Baby boy had to stay in the NICU so bfing was extremely hard. This plus my supply was never high enough (he is in the 90+ % for height ever since birth and eats a ton)... I tried for a month to bf but just had to ff, too. (At about a week old he was already eating a few ounces every 1-2 hours!! I would nurse for 45 min and he'd scream from hunger after finishing) I had the baby blues and this did not help - I felt so awful and guilty. My SIL has two LOs and chose not to bf so she was a great support. He is strictly formula fed and is a very healthy, large four month old boy! Don't feel guilty about your decision and don't allow anyone to bully you. My SIL has two girls (and plans to have more) who are VERY close w her and she is a wonderful mother. Her almost four yr old is extraordinarily bright, as well. Society puts too much pressure and too much guilt on mothers as it is. Anyway, my son was born long and lean at 21.65 inches and 7 lb 2 oz. He is now almost 26 inches and 16 lb. Big boy and very healthy... and loves his mommy regardless of where his food comes from. Mommy is still feeding him!