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july4mrsO
Happy boy!
Member since 5/10 2867 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by Naturalmama
Posted by AllyMally
Posted by Naturalmama
Posted by alisha
Honestly this post has me 
I can't believe how many of you don't/didn't want your baby in the room with you! That was a requirement for me, actually the very first question I asked on my hospital tour. I wanted my baby with me every second.
Because not everyone is you. Not wanting your baby with you every second doesn't make someone less of a mother. 2.5 years in, I still don't want my children with my every second. Most seconds, yes.  But not EVERY second. But I would never judge a mother who didn't agree with me. More important things to over.
She never said it made anyone less of a mother. She just doesn't understand it and I don't either.
Understood and I apologize. I still don't think it is for anyone to "understand" though. Not everyone thinks the same way.
Also, not everyone's labor, recovery, amount of help from others is the same. Maybe if you had an easy recovery and your DH there to help out overnight then it's easier to have your LO room in. But if you had a rough recovery with no help overnight then maybe you need a break. Like a PP said, I felt it was almost dangerous that I wasn't getting any rest. I couldn't keep my eyes open and I was trying to nurse and recover from a c/s. I did have DS room in the entire time but sometimes I look back and think I should have rested a little so I could take better care of him.
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Posted 11/21/13 8:17 PM  |
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jax1023
LIF Adult
Member since 3/07 1165 total posts
Name:
Jackie
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What are your thoughts?
I delivered my son at a hospital with this policy. Since then I moved 400 miles away. I am now looking for a place where they will allow this, I don't want my baby removed,
Babies belong with their mothers. I can not for the life of me understand why anyone would want them in a nursery. I worked a filla day of work before going into labor and delivering in the middle of the night, yes I was tired, I had complications and they almost had to take me to the or. But I wanted my baby with me, that's where he belonged, not all alone in sme nursery so I could sleep.
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| Posted 11/21/13 8:25 PM |
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StarsStripes
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 1192 total posts
Name:
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What are your thoughts?
My first was in the NICU and my second spent the first night with me. The second night the nurses encouraged me to put dc in the nursery because I was exhausted and needed sleep. They brought dc to nurse and it all worked out. I don't feel bad for one second. Happy Mom Happy Baby.... To each their own, let's not be too judgmental ladies.
Message edited 11/21/2013 8:33:35 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/13 8:33 PM |
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skinny
3 boys and a princess!
Member since 11/08 8178 total posts
Name:
Momma
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Re: What are your thoughts?
I had a c/s both times. Hell yes the babies went to he nursery at night. Especially with the second c/s. I had 21mo twins at home and those few precious days in the hospital were the only real days of recovery time for me. If your DH was in the hospital with you, you had a vaginal delivery and had no other children at home and kept the baby in the room with you....I see why you did. Not everyone was in that situation.
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| Posted 11/21/13 8:36 PM |
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Naturalmama
Love my boys!!
Member since 1/12 3548 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Whenever a thread like this pops up...all I think of is the opening line to the Different Strokes theme song.
The world don't move to the beat of just one drum, what might be right for you, might not be right for some...
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| Posted 11/21/13 8:47 PM |
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MommyX3
LIF Infant
Member since 5/13 126 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Honestly as a c section mom I can't even imagine...I was in recovery for over 6 hours before my spinal wore off and I could feel my legs. Had my babies at 630 and was in recovery till midnight. I was also tethered to about 10 cords and wires and monitors till the next morning. I remember the agony of having to transfer myself from the gurney to my bed at 1230 am. Just shifting over was excruciating! I needed to page a nurse to pee the first few times after my catheter was removed.
C sections do not get the consideration they deserve from people who have never had them.
Years later I had a tummy tuck and all I heard was omg it's excruciating, you'll want to die, the worst recovery ever, major surgery etc...
It had NOTHING on a c section!
So so sick of women being told how they should feel and what they should want. This is just another bodily choice issue. Believe us when we tell you what we want and what we can handle. It's an outrage.
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| Posted 11/21/13 8:56 PM |
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Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!
Member since 5/05 12165 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Hell yes, I put that baby in the nursery all alone so I could get some sleep! In fact, here's how my births went down...
 #1=put her in the nursery at night and had them bring her back for both overnight feelings.
#2=put her in the nursery at night and had them bring her back for one overnight feeding.
 #3=put him in the nursery and....ummmmm....yeah...
Also, I had three c-sections; I cannot IMAGINE getting out of bed that first night with a catheter and IVs and all to care for a baby. They even brought my breakfast to me that next morning (LIJ was a breakfast buffet at that time), 24 hours later at that. All the rest of the nights would have been beyond brutal as well for that matter.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:00 PM |
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mrsboss
my little love
Member since 12/09 5054 total posts
Name:
Me
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What are your thoughts?
Just more tales of heroism from moms who cannot fathom being away from their baby for a moment. Now THAT is something I dont understand. Kudos to you!
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:03 PM |
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july4mrsO
Happy boy!
Member since 5/10 2867 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by Naturalmama
Whenever a thread like this pops up...all I think of is the opening line to the Different Strokes theme song.
The world don't move to the beat of just one drum, what might be right for you, might not be right for some...
 now it's totally in my head!
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:09 PM |
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nancy6485
So in love
Member since 10/05 3363 total posts
Name:
Nancy
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Re: What are your thoughts?
The hospital I gave birth in did not have a nursery. I had my son with me the whole 5 days I was in for my C-section, so I did not have a choice.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:10 PM |
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BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre
Member since 5/05 9320 total posts
Name:
Mrs. B
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by jax1023
I delivered my son at a hospital with this policy. Since then I moved 400 miles away. I am now looking for a place where they will allow this, I don't want my baby removed,
Babies belong with their mothers. I can not for the life of me understand why anyone would want them in a nursery. I worked a filla day of work before going into labor and delivering in the middle of the night, yes I was tired, I had complications and they almost had to take me to the or. But I wanted my baby with me, that's where he belonged, not all alone in sme nursery so I could sleep.
You don't have to understand it...you do the Mommy role the way you think it should be done and let others do it the way they think it should be done.
Seriously, people need to come off their soap boxes. These responses are so righteous. Some people had horrible deliveries and needed to rest in order to prepare what was waiting for them when they checked out of the hospital.
I shared a room with a woman who had such a terrible delivery and ended up with c-section. She had complications with her surgery while she was in the room with me. There were nurses and doctors in and out of my room all night checking on her. Should she have had her DD with her in the room??
People need to realize not everyone does things the way they do them. They need to stop thinking its the wrong way.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:17 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by ourhappysurprise2012
Posted by BriBri2u
I sent DS to the nursery when I delievered him. I was exhausted and I needed to sleep. It was the one piece of advice from friends who had BTDT that I appreciated and took.
The nurses took him and asked when I wanted him brought back - he was back in my room by 6:30 the next morning.
I am planning on doing the same with DD in a month.
I will be the one getting up to care for her for the next how ever many nights once she comes home. I hardly think 2 nights rest is going to break our bonding experience.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:17 PM |
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alisha
LIF Adult
Member since 3/07 1199 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by mrsboss
Just more tales of heroism from moms who cannot fathom being away from their baby for a moment. Now THAT is something I dont understand. Kudos to you!
No heroism here. I subscribe to attachment parenting and strongly believe that, especially in the first few days after birth, a baby should be with mommy. Not in a nursery.
I am a fan of the policy, and I am also a fan of hospitals encouraging moms to breastfeed (another topic that caused debate months ago). You don't have to share my beliefs- but if hospitals are instituting these policies it is probably because science supports it.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:31 PM |
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curiousgeorge
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/10 867 total posts
Name:
MAMA
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Re: What are your thoughts?
My first I had them bring me dd for every feeding at night..breast feeding, no substitution. Had her all day.
My second had her all day...substituted while breast feeding and let them keep her at night.
I needed my rest. . I slept. It was the best thing I could do for myself. My dd won't remember and when she gets older and has her babies I will tell her my best advice! Let the professionals take your baby so you can recover and rest. lol btw I was a much happier energetic mama by the time I got home to juggle the two. No regrets here! I love my kids so much! They know it
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:34 PM |
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BriBri2u
L'amore vince sempre
Member since 5/05 9320 total posts
Name:
Mrs. B
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by alisha
Posted by mrsboss
Just more tales of heroism from moms who cannot fathom being away from their baby for a moment. Now THAT is something I dont understand. Kudos to you!
No heroism here. I subscribe to attachment parenting and strongly believe that, especially in the first few days after birth, a baby should be with mommy. Not in a nursery.
I am a fan of the policy, and I am also a fan of hospitals encouraging moms to breastfeed (another topic that caused debate months ago). You don't have to share my beliefs- but if hospitals are instituting these policies it is probably because science supports it.
I think your beliefs exclude those babies who have to be put in incubators or are hooked up to tubes and ventilators and cannot be with their mothers those first days.
Are they going to be less attached to their mother because of it?
How about nb babies and their fathers? I don't know many fathers that were around their nb 24/7 those first few days.
Also, I'm pretty sure the reason more hospitals are following this is because it has more to do with money than with science.
Message edited 11/21/2013 9:42:43 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:42 PM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by BriBri2u
Posted by alisha
Posted by mrsboss
Just more tales of heroism from moms who cannot fathom being away from their baby for a moment. Now THAT is something I dont understand. Kudos to you!
No heroism here. I subscribe to attachment parenting and strongly believe that, especially in the first few days after birth, a baby should be with mommy. Not in a nursery.
I am a fan of the policy, and I am also a fan of hospitals encouraging moms to breastfeed (another topic that caused debate months ago). You don't have to share my beliefs- but if hospitals are instituting these policies it is probably because science supports it.
I think your beliefs exclude those babies who have to be put in incubators or are hooked up to tubes and ventilators and cannot be with their mothers those first days.
Are they going to be less attached to their mother because of it?
How about nb babies and their fathers? I don't know many fathers that were around their nb 24/7 those first few days.
Also, I'm pretty sure the reason more hospitals are following this is because it has more to do with money than with science.
I will not be any less of a mother b/c I will be sending my daughter to the nursery at night. She will have more than enough time to bond with a well-rested me and my husband during the day.
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| Posted 11/21/13 9:50 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by alisha
Honestly this post has me
I can't believe how many of you don't/didn't want your baby in the room with you! That was a requirement for me, actually the very first question I asked on my hospital tour. I wanted my baby with me every second.
It's not that I didn't, I flat out couldn't.
Two horrible C-sections, horrible reactions to the spinals, passed out cold for 12 hrs after surgery with both kids, excruciating, crippling pain, inability to get around well, exhaustion to the point of weakness because I couldn't find a comfortable position to sleep..................just a FEW reasons why I couldn't have my babies with me 24/7.
I had major surgery, it wasn't easy for me, I needed to recover.
ETA - I am very thankful DH was home with me for two weeks after we had our kids. It was an immense help. It took me that long to feel better, get around better, and function more normally.
Message edited 11/21/2013 10:31:11 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/13 10:29 PM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by jax1023
I delivered my son at a hospital with this policy. Since then I moved 400 miles away. I am now looking for a place where they will allow this, I don't want my baby removed,
Babies belong with their mothers. I can not for the life of me understand why anyone would want them in a nursery. I worked a filla day of work before going into labor and delivering in the middle of the night, yes I was tired, I had complications and they almost had to take me to the or. But I wanted my baby with me, that's where he belonged, not all alone in sme nursery so I could sleep.
Have a horrible C-section and then get back to me.
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| Posted 11/21/13 10:36 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Why, why, why are we SO mean and judgy to one another?
With the head scratching and the "I can't believes".
It's SO FRUSTRATING.
And then someone will post an article about how moms are doing the best they can and everyone claps and are all supportive of one another. THAT'S what has me scratching my head.
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| Posted 11/21/13 10:40 PM |
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Ayne11
Yep
Member since 1/09 18021 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by Jenn627
Why, why, why are we SO mean and judgy to one another?
With the head scratching and the "I can't believes".
It's SO FRUSTRATING.
And then someone will post an article about how moms are doing the best they can and everyone claps and are all supportive of one another. THAT'S what has me scratching my head.
Brava! <---- slow claps
Message edited 11/21/2013 10:44:13 PM.
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| Posted 11/21/13 10:43 PM |
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edfilippi
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 997 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: What are your thoughts?
There are so many interesting points made. I think this most likely is a result of the breastfeeding push. I know some women will say give a bottle in the middle of the night so the RN can feed them and mom sleeps. If the baby is rooming with you I can see how you would be more inclined to try and breastfeed yourself instead of give a bottle especially if breastfeeding was your goal.
I had a c section. I was in my room at like 1:30am. I believe I breastfed him and he went to the nursery for 2 hours when they brought him back to me. I kept him for the rest of our stay except for weight checks and when he needed to be under the lights for jaundice. Was it hard? Yes. Did it hurt to get up out of bed and get him while he was crying? Yes. Did I sleep more than maybe 10 hours total in 4 days? No. But I wouldn't trade that time with him for anything so I would have no problem with it.
I think if you are taking pain medication that is making you drowsy or if its night 1 of post c section then the baby should be able to stay in the nursery. Otherwise I think its great to have the baby with you.
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| Posted 11/21/13 10:58 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Good Sam was like that. When we did the tour they said baby stays with mama. I wasn't given the choice.
Really? When did that start? It wasn't like that when I had DS in 8/11. I'm disappointed to hear that because that's where my ob delivers.
IMO, if mom wants some down time to recover, (which is the point of any hospitalization, no?) than the option should be available.
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| Posted 11/21/13 11:05 PM |
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Re: What are your thoughts?
As I said earlier, I think Moms should have the CHOICE, but I'm honesty surprised by how many people wouldn't choose to keep their brand new baby with them at all times.
I think it's funny how on one thread people who want elective c-sections are judged bc it's not natural/has risks...but on this thread, the most natural thing-having a baby stay with his mother from the time he's born-is criticized bc how dare someone tell a mom she should suck it up and care for HER OWN baby!!!!
***I'm NOT talking about people who had complications or were too physically ill to lift their child, or the babies that have to go to NICU...*** BUT if you're having a baby, the last night of sleep you should expect to get is the sleep you get BEFORE the baby is born...
My DD was in the NICU, and I hardly slept bc I was afraid that if I didn't get up every 2 hours and get my butt to that NICU they'd give my DD a bottle (she had low blood sugar and were trying to force me to bottle feed...even though when I let them try it once, it didn't work!) I would've given anything to have DD with me all night, and I pray that this time DS won't have to go to the NICU and I can keep him all night!
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| Posted 11/21/13 11:22 PM |
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sunnygirl
loving life
Member since 1/07 5413 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: What are your thoughts?
I had a csection and gave birth to twins and yes I sent them to the nursery every night and I don't feel bad or regret it one bit. The first night I had a catheter in me and was hooked up to whatever I was hooked up to I couldn't get out of bed even if I wanted to. My dh did not stay in the hospital overnight with me, how was I supposed to take care of twins if I can't even get out of bed, I couldn't reach their little beds and I'm even more horrible because they were formula fed, I knew once I got home there would be many many sleepless nights so I got a few nights of sleep to rest and recover. Big deal I bonded with them all day.. My dds and I bonded just fine
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| Posted 11/21/13 11:25 PM |
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Re: What are your thoughts?
Posted by jax1023
I delivered my son at a hospital with this policy. Since then I moved 400 miles away. I am now looking for a place where they will allow this, I don't want my baby removed,
Babies belong with their mothers. I can not for the life of me understand why anyone would want them in a nursery. I worked a filla day of work before going into labor and delivering in the middle of the night, yes I was tired, I had complications and they almost had to take me to the or. But I wanted my baby with me, that's where he belonged, not all alone in sme nursery so I could sleep.
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| Posted 11/21/13 11:27 PM |
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