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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
I'd probably pay it but be hesitant to recommend her to others, if at all.
I did not read through the responses so perhaps others have said this but honestly, I find her statement about "I know what I would do" patronizing. It was not her place to jump on a high horse about ethics. I would find her wording insulting.
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Posted 1/25/11 2:33 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
I know nothing about this vendor at all or even much about invitations.
As the bride, I would have assumed that the $0.00 material fee meant that the paper being used was the default for any invitation and if I wanted one of the others, there would be an upcharge, so I wouldn't assume the first $0.00 was an error. I would be annoyed that this far in the process she is looking to get $40.00 and she should just suck it up.
As the vendor, I would think I made an honest mistake and that $40.00 isn't that much more for a bride to shell out and that perhaps you will do the right thing and pay the $40.00, even if I made the mistake.
As someone not involved in this at all, I would probably just pay the $40 to ensure she does my invitations the way I requested, but I would send her a letter after the wedding expressing my dissatisfaction with how this was handled. Trying to guilt someone into paying $40 for a mistake you made as a vendor by questioning their ethics is pretty lame. As the vendor, I would probably let you know I made a mistake, but won't charge you for it and hope it would mean repeat business for me.
Message edited 1/25/2011 2:35:36 PM.
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:34 PM |
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brownie
Baby #1 is here!
Member since 11/08 13903 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by MandJZ
Posted by DrMeg
I would send her an email saying that you are willing to split the difference. That you understand that people make mistakes but you were unhappy with how she handled the situation.
after reading through all the replies I think this one gets at the best way to handle the situation. it allows you to (politely) say what is on your mind about how she handled it, and then split the different so it isn't a lose-lose situation
ITA!
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:34 PM |
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Otherme
Square head cutie pants
Member since 3/06 6899 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by KittyGags
I've dealt with said vendor before and I was very unhappy with her.
That being said, I wouldn't pay the $40 and I would tell her that you don't appreciate it being added in after the fact. Had you not added a service, she never would've tried to bill you for it and its SNEAKY.
Also, don't worry about her taking the $40 loss--my friend made her own POCKETFOLD invites and she spent around $120 doing so. Tessa is making a small fortune on each and every bride that comes to her.
But none of this matters in THIS particular instance. Anyone else's bad experiences with this person doesn't mean that the OP should act any differently.
If everyone else had a positive experience with this vendor, would you encourage her to pay the $40 because the vendor is nice?
none of this has any bearing on the matter
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:39 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
As far as negative comments go...
I had read one or two posts about some snippy emails, but I didn't think they were so bad. I actually asked Ron about why she was banned from LIW and it didn't seem like the reason was anything that would impact my invitation experience.
I was wary about the blocked thing, but then I read so so so many glowing reviews that I felt the good experiences everyone had outweighed everything else.
If my invitations come out the way they are supposed to, they are going to be really beautiful.
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:39 PM |
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Otherme
Square head cutie pants
Member since 3/06 6899 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
As far as negative comments go...
I had read one or two posts about some snippy emails, but I didn't think they were so bad. I actually asked Ron about why she was banned from LIW and it didn't seem like the reason was anything that would impact my invitation experience.
I was wary about the blocked thing, but then I read so so so many glowing reviews that I felt the good experiences everyone had outweighed everything else.
If my invitations come out the way they are supposed to, they are going to be really beautiful.
And ultimately... that's the important thing 
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:40 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by Otherme
Posted by JenniferEver
As far as negative comments go...
I had read one or two posts about some snippy emails, but I didn't think they were so bad. I actually asked Ron about why she was banned from LIW and it didn't seem like the reason was anything that would impact my invitation experience.
I was wary about the blocked thing, but then I read so so so many glowing reviews that I felt the good experiences everyone had outweighed everything else.
If my invitations come out the way they are supposed to, they are going to be really beautiful.
And ultimately... that's the important thing
I love how originally I was like "oh I don't want to spent a lot of money on something people throw out. I will make them myself"... uh huh.. $1000 later....
Maybe that's why I'm getting so emotional about this. I am making huge sacrifices for these stupid invitiations and I feel like I'm being D----ed around over $40.
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:46 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
It looks like the invoices are done with quick books if that gives any insight on the "automatic" adjustment.
I still don't buy it. She re did my quote a few times because I added 2nd envelopes and liners and it did not "automatically" update then. I don't see how a computer program can know how much something costs and add it in after the fact...
Does anyone else know?
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:48 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Then don't pay it. You booked her based on her pricing & her work. The pricing SHE GAVE YOU.
She is completely unprofessional to try to guilt a client into paying for her mistake. She has some nerve questioning the ethics of not paying her when she doesn't even give the courtesy of the additional material fee.
As I said before, you are COMPLETELY justified in paying for the AGREED UPON amount. And heaven help her if she screws around on sending you your invites.
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:50 PM |
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
I love how originally I was like "oh I don't want to spent a lot of money on something people throw out. I will make them myself"... uh huh.. $1000 later....
Maybe that's why I'm getting so emotional about this. I am making huge sacrifices for these stupid invitiations and I feel like I'm being D----ed around over $40.
See, and this is why, in this economy, small business owners need to realize that people are making great sacrifices in order to get what they want.
There is a lot of competition out there, and you could have went to other people. But you didn't. She should be lucky to have you, not the other way around.
I'm not saying that if you are a small business owner to have everyone take advantage of you, but you have to do people right. They can make careless mistakes, yes, but sometimes they have to end up paying for them. They have to make sure all their i's are dotted and t's are crossed. That's part of the responsibility of owning your own business. When *I* f*ck up at work, guess who pays for it? ME. And that's how it should be.
They are working for you, not the other way around.
I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
Message edited 1/25/2011 2:52:26 PM.
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:51 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by nrthshgrl
Then don't pay it. You booked her based on her pricing & her work. The pricing SHE GAVE YOU.
She is completely unprofessional to try to guilt a client into paying for her mistake. She has some nerve questioning the ethics of not paying her when she doesn't even give the courtesy of the additional material fee.
As I said before, you are COMPLETELY justified in paying for the AGREED UPON amount. And heaven help her if she screws around on sending you your invites.
My Bridal Party has 5 attorneys in it. Heaven help her is right!!!
I am just stressed about it, and people on this thread are making it seem like I'm trying to do the wrong thing. I feel like I am right on this.
How do you think I should handle talking to her about it? Or do you think I should send her a check (minus the additional fee) and not say anything. What would you do?
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| Posted 1/25/11 2:55 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JennP
I'd probably pay it but be hesitant to recommend her to others, if at all.
I did not read through the responses so perhaps others have said this but honestly, I find her statement about "I know what I would do" patronizing. It was not her place to jump on a high horse about ethics. I would find her wording insulting.
This is the thing that annoys me. The mistake was hers whether it was an oversight or a technical issue. Then to "scold" you for questioning it, ugh my blood would be boiling. I would probably turn it around on her.
Dear soandso,
Thank you for the morals lesson. That is cetainly worth $40 in my opinion. Lets call it even and I'll give you a lesson-don't speak to a client that way, especially when you are in the wrong. Have a great day:
Message edited 1/25/2011 3:06:09 PM.
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:05 PM |
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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
Posted by nrthshgrl
Then don't pay it. You booked her based on her pricing & her work. The pricing SHE GAVE YOU.
She is completely unprofessional to try to guilt a client into paying for her mistake. She has some nerve questioning the ethics of not paying her when she doesn't even give the courtesy of the additional material fee.
As I said before, you are COMPLETELY justified in paying for the AGREED UPON amount. And heaven help her if she screws around on sending you your invites.
My Bridal Party has 5 attorneys in it. Heaven help her is right!!!
I am just stressed about it, and people on this thread are making it seem like I'm trying to do the wrong thing. I feel like I am right on this.
How do you think I should handle talking to her about it? Or do you think I should send her a check (minus the additional fee) and not say anything. What would you do?
You are not wrong, and she is the last person to talk about ethics..trust me on that. I was angry for you when she put that little dig in about leaving it up to you to do the right thing. holy sh**
Honestly, email her and tell her that you dont appreciate the lecture on ethics b/c she is the one adding in charges and not explaining it. I would be fair and offer to split it but definitely explain how displeased you are with her email and her service thus far and all you want is your invitations to be done correctly at this point. If she balks, then you are not contractually obligated to pay it as she already accepted your check for the materials fee.
She should take this as a lesson learned about her contract and realize it needs to be fixed or she should be more careful with her invoicing;
Sh** happens..we all make mistakes. and I would normally pay sh** like this b/c I hate confrontation, and want to do the right thing.
really..she's going to bust balls over $40 in paper..good grief.
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:05 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by DRMom
Dear soandso,
Thank you for the morals lesson. That is cetainly worth $40 in my opinion. Lets call it even and I'll give you a lesson-don't speak to a client that way, especially when you are in the wrong. Have a great day:
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:11 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Check with Kara or your bridal party but something along these lines....
"Than you for clarifying what the additional charges were. Given that they were added after the materials fee was paid in full, I was confused. After much consideration, I will be paying the original agreed upon materials fee per our contract.
I choose to work with you based on your work & the quote that was given to me.
Thank you."
PS
Don't preach ethics to me after you threw in additional fees without alerting me you unethical sneaky blahblah...
In all seriousness, engaging in a debate over ethics is just going to further sour the relationship. She thinks she is right & no amount of your arguing is going to change her mind.
You can add in that you feel the right thing to do is to pay the orginally contracted amount.
Message edited 1/25/2011 3:21:19 PM.
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:19 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
My "legal team" has so far weighed in that I am 100% right regarding contract law. so she can suck it.
I guess I am just shocked by how I'm being treated. I want to respond, but I don't want to sour the relationship (at least until I get all of my invitations)... I'll give it some thought before I respond, but I think your response is good Barb. I think I will add something about the poor customer service, without referring to her erroneous placement of herself atop the ethical high horse.
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:24 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
My "legal team" has so far weighed in that I am 100% right regarding contract law. so she can suck it.
I guess I am just shocked by how I'm being treated. I want to respond, but I don't want to sour the relationship (at least until I get all of my invitations)... I'll give it some thought before I respond, but I think your response is good Barb. I think I will add something about the poor customer service, without referring to her erroneous placement of herself atop the ethical high horse.
I don't think you should write poor customer service yet. As I said don't engage her unless it's to remind her of her contractual obligations.
Say whatever you want after you get those invites but the back & forth will only inflame situation that you don't want to escalate.
You have enough stress. Don't add to it.
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:38 PM |
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bicosi
life is a carousel
Member since 7/07 14956 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
I agree with the above..
Just do what you have to to get your invites back and be done with this vendor.. AFTER, than you can let her know where you stand..
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:40 PM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
I agree with you that she messed up and is now trying to make up that $40.
I probably wouldn't pay it, but if it's something that's going to cause you anxiety until you receive the finished invitations, your sanity may be worth the $40, KWIM?
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| Posted 1/25/11 3:59 PM |
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emilylives
biking
Member since 12/09 2163 total posts
Name:
Emily
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by nrthshgrl
I would pay what I'm contractually obligated to pay - without a second thought.
If you contracted a person to do something based on a quote they gave you, I see no ethical uncertainty at all.
If you knew she miscalcuated & then took advantage of that, then I'd say it's not right.
I agree! I would definitely pay it and wouldn't really have an issue with the email she sent.
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| Posted 1/25/11 4:02 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by emilylives
Posted by nrthshgrl
I would pay what I'm contractually obligated to pay - without a second thought.
If you contracted a person to do something based on a quote they gave you, I see no ethical uncertainty at all.
If you knew she miscalcuated & then took advantage of that, then I'd say it's not right.
I agree! I would definitely pay it and wouldn't really have an issue with the email she sent.
You're saying 2 diff things. Barb is saying not to pay.
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| Posted 1/25/11 4:03 PM |
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
it's a small amount..like 40 bucks.
It's not the money I'm mad about, but the way she handled it.
ITA...that and she came off snotty in the email. She shouldn't be telling you to to do the right thing. She should do the right thing. It really isn't a loop hole, it is a mistake on her part. I find her attitude unacceptable.
From the tone of her email, it seems like this is not the first time she has made this "mistake".
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| Posted 1/25/11 7:45 PM |
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MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *
Member since 2/09 6243 total posts
Name:
Gina
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
Posted by cateyemm
this is a toughie... i'd probably pay it.
is this t e ssa?
Yup. I know she's sent some nasty emails before but I somehow thought it would be ok,.
in the past there has been so much controversy with tessa... i dunno how she's still getting recommendations  she did a HORRIBLE mock up invite for me and im soo glad bc i found an awesome girl on etsy to make my invites instead...
I'd screw her over on the $ just bc she irks me... but she can totally fcuk up your invites too if you decide not to pay her... so is it worth it in the end?
Message edited 1/25/2011 7:51:55 PM.
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| Posted 1/25/11 7:50 PM |
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emilylives
biking
Member since 12/09 2163 total posts
Name:
Emily
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by JenniferEver
Posted by emilylives
Posted by nrthshgrl
I would pay what I'm contractually obligated to pay - without a second thought.
If you contracted a person to do something based on a quote they gave you, I see no ethical uncertainty at all.
If you knew she miscalcuated & then took advantage of that, then I'd say it's not right.
I agree! I would definitely pay it and wouldn't really have an issue with the email she sent.
You're saying 2 diff things. Barb is saying not to pay.
Oops, sorry!  I quoted the wrong post.
I would pay the extra money, but I'm going to go back on the second comment I made and say that she handled it poorly.
I would say something like:
"I will pay the extra money because I feel like I should pay for what I'm getting, but I wish that you would have simply explained the issue to me instead of making me try to feel immoral for even asking the question. I feel like I have been entirely up front with you, and don't see why we need to be having a discussion about whose morals are superior."
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| Posted 1/25/11 7:54 PM |
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MamaLeen
:)
Member since 10/09 4594 total posts
Name:
E
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Re: WR - Problem with vendor- WWYD
Posted by disneychick13
Posted by JenniferEver
it's a small amount..like 40 bucks.
It's not the money I'm mad about, but the way she handled it.
ITA...that and she came off snotty in the email. She shouldn't be telling you to to do the right thing. She should do the right thing. It really isn't a loop hole, it is a mistake on her part. I find her attitude unacceptable.
From the tone of her email, it seems like this is not the first time she has made this "mistake".
ITA. She should do the right thing, SHE is the business owner and SHE made a mistake. She needs to suck it up and eat the money. How dare she try and give you a lesson on ethics!!
I would focus on getting what you ordered and moving on, it is not worth it. Maybe pay half if that would smooth things over just to not have the stress.
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| Posted 1/25/11 8:00 PM |
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