BTDT- visitors in the hospital

How long after a c-section before visitors can visit? My IL's are pressuring me for a specific and soon as possible time to see the baby. I have no idea how the day is going to go so it is annoying me. All i know is my surgery is scheduled for 8:30 am. I know they do prep, and then deliver the baby and then stitch you back up and then there is probably a wait before they let you in your room... and i want to BF so there will have to be naked bonding time in which I won't be having visitors. i don't understand why they don't just deal with me saying well hospital visiting hours are noon to 8pm. I want my parents to visit first anyway, I have no idea when they'll be able to see me and my parents are not freaking out over the fact that I haven't given them a specific scheduled time. It was my assumption if the grandparents care so much, they sit in the waiting area and wait to be called in. i feel like they are also going to try and stay in the room forever once they get there. Now they've made me paranoid about how soon they'll be able to barge into the room and when they should come. If it was mu choice, I'd ask them to come day 2.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I completely understand and you HAVE to keep as much control as possible with families like that - I wish I put my foot down more! I walked into the OR at about 12:30 and sat on the table. They gave me the local, then the spinal and I immediately felt my butt start going numb. They laid me down, prepped everything and put the blue sheet up. DH came in and they started probably close to 1pm. My CS lasted about an hour and I was in recovery until I could bend my knees - about 2.5-3 hours. DD was born at 2:01 pm and I saw visitors about 6pm.

I had mine at Winthrop and here's what happened after the surgery: Wheeled into recovery with DH and baby. We did "skin-to-skin" immediately and they let me breastfeed - DH was by my side almost the entire time. The nurse gave me ice and constantly monitored me. Once I bent my knees enough they called to have be transported. They brought me upstairs and lifted me into the hospital bed on top of a bunch of chucks. The nurse will get you all situated then you lose ALL modesty Lol. They lift your gown, squirt your parts with warm water and clean everything again. They also put compression boots on your legs for circulation and top you off with a warm blanket. Then you can see visitors. That said, they did let DH walk with the nurse to the visiting room doors and everyone looked at DD from a distance. Not sure every hospital's policy on that one.

HTH!!

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

It depends on how your c-section goes. You could be visitor-ready in a few hours, or you could be a mess. (Sorry, but it's true). I needed a transfusion after my c and was stuck in Recovery Room Purgatory for the whole first day; a friend of mine was in her room after two hours and was entertaining her family by dinner. Getting BFing started is challenging and you won't want an audience (unless they're actually supportive and helpful).

Tell your ILs that you just don't know, but your DH will text them as soon as he can. Thats the most exact answer they're going to get w/o a crystal ball!

Message edited 7/28/2012 4:38:26 PM.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I'm not a BTDT mom but honestly I would just tell your ILs that if they want a DEFINITE time then day 1 isn't going to happen. There are too many variables. Like the pp said she needed a transfusion, a friend of mine had her c-section scheduled for 10am and was pushed back to 8pm and was sitting around all day waiting and even without any little hiccups you still have no way of knowing how you're going to feel afterwards. The ILs have to understand that this isn't something that can be timed down to a specific hour, and if they HAVE to be there that first day then DH will let them know that day when it's good to come by.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

It depends on you. Some people are up to their rooms quick others its hr. You will be in recovery. My ILs saw DS up in the nursery while I was in recovery

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

My sister had a c-section a few weeks ago and I think she didn't have visitors until the next day.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I don't believe in feeling pressured to have anyone see your baby. Hell, you can tell them to wait until your settled at home if you want.

This is about you and your baby. Not inlaws.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I wanted it to just be me and DH and have no one at the hospital the day i have the baby. I've had a c-section, i was miserable right after (granted it was an emergency last time) but i know how i am going to feel. I wont be up for visitors. I'll just want DH and my baby. Well, i was informed that my MIL will be meeting us at the hospital the 2 hours before i go in for the c-section! Really?!?!? DH and I fought big time about that and me being the one having the surgery apparently has no say in this. I am NOT happy about it!

ETA: I was in recovery for 6 hours last time and was not allowed visitors until after i was out. But it was after midnight so i made DH tell everyone to go home because they could not see the twins anyway since they were in the NICU.

Message edited 7/28/2012 10:01:48 PM.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

You won't know for sure because of so many variables. Surgery can be pushed back due to the dr having an emergency, etc. Tell them if they need a time to come at 12 and maybe you will be ready but maybe not. It's major surgery not a freakin' dinner party.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I had my DD via C-section at 5:42am and was literally down and out for 12 hrs after..........I had a bad reaction to the morphine. As they wheeled me into maternity my family was able to see me for a minute and they were allowed to go see our DD in the nursery right away. Then that afternoon, my parents, Grandma, and IL's came for the Grandparent visiting hours from 2 to 4. I was out of it for the most part but they were sooooo excited to see the baby so I had no problem with them coming. Everyone was in my room with the baby, I slept.

By 5:30 that evening I was feeling better and VERY excited to see all my visitors at the general visiting hours from 7 to 8pm. (baby stays in nursery) I had all my friends and family there, it was wonderful!!! I think what made it all manageable was that the visiting hours were very restrictive at St Charles so I had plenty of rest time in between visits.

My honest opinion, crappy as you may feel, I wouldn't feel right telling people not to visit when the baby is born. I know my family and friends were just as excited as we were and they would've been very disappointed if we had asked them to not come. Trust me, I felt like holy h-e-l-l but I am glad everyone was there.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

After my c section I got to hold dd while I was wheeled to the recovery my mama and in-laws were in the hall. They saw me for a minute then I was in recovery for two hours. I was not able to hold my baby until I was in my room. They for to see the baby on the nursery while tthey cleaned and weighed her. They said because I had gd she had to be up in nursery by 1 hour after birth. DH held her 20 minutes while they closed me up. I was sad I got no skin to skin or BF. By the time I got to my room everyone had left but my BIL who works in the hospital.
It's your call if you want it just be you and DH then have it.you will never have that time again and you may be exhausted from surgery. They can always see the baby in the nursery.
It's your birth plan all the way thru

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

After my c/s the nurses brought DD into the recovery room. My dad, DH, and DS were there. I really felt ok to have visitors right away. My dad and DH's family came the next day. It really depends on how you are feeling.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I had surgery at 11 and had immediate family visiting at 4. I was fine day 1 bc I had still had the epi in! Day 2 was ROUGH getting out of bed for the first time etc, day 3 was better.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

there are way to many variables.. Even with a vag. birth, I started pushing at 10pm and baby arrived 12:30 am....... Boy was I surprised to find IL's and my mother in the waiting room...... After 27 hours of not being able to eat my mother was trying to force mini pastries and a footlong sub on me - and got offended that I only wanted juice....

then they all didn't even get to see the baby because he was quickly wisked away to the NICU. I felt like crap from the anti seizure medicine given for the preeclampsia and had to be wheel chaired down to the nicu that evening to see the baby for a short time so that dh could then individually take back each of the 4 grandparents and 2 great granparents ( as there is a limit to 2 parents, or 1 parent 1 grandparent at a time in the nicu........

With pictures on cell phones you'd think people wouldn't have to rush to see the baby while your in recovery...

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Message edited 2/9/2014 2:40:48 AM.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

I made it clear to my doctor and to all the nurses I could that when I got to my room, and my baby was brought to me, I wanted NO visitors. I wanted to get situated, bond with my son, and try to breastfeed before anyone was allowed in. I didn't care WHO was waiting outside.

I was the patient, and the nurses listen to the mother's requests. They are there to care for YOU.


I had a schedules c-section. Got to hospital at 6:00 a.m. My DS wasn't born until 11:00 a.m. because other babies were being born and they were emergencies. So nothing is definite, even with a scheduled time.


FWIW, we told both sets of grandparents to wait at home, and we'd call when it was time for visitors. My parents obliged, my inlaws did not. They showed up when they wanted, and were told to wait out in the lobby.

I later found out how hurt my mother was that she wasn't there. Not because I told her not to, but because she respected my wishes and didn't just show up. It was HER daughter having a baby...if anyone was waiting outside, it should have been her. I had no control over it, but I felt (and still feel badly) that she had that moment "trumped" by someone else.

Message edited 7/31/2012 12:50:08 PM.

BTDT- visitors in the hospital

im not a btdt mom, but i personally would tell them if they want a specific time, they should come at noon (or whatever time) the day AFTER the c-section. But if they want to come that day they will need to wait for DH to call them bc you dont know how long it will take or if you will be feeling up to visitors.
tell them youre sorry but the doctors say there are many factors that go into it, starting of course with the dr running late, but then also you and how you recover so there is no known time you can give them so if they want to come that day they will need to be flexible. but if its easier you will just see them the next day at noon.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

The only way they can have a definite time of the day is if you call them when you are ready ........

Just b/c you're scheduled at 8:30 am doesn't mean that you're going to go into the OR at that time - you have no idea how long you'll have to be in recovery, when you'll get into your own room etc etc .......that is all stuff that you (and no one else) has any control over .......

I had one rule - I don't care WHO you are, there was no way in hell you were holding my baby before I did - And I don't mean for 5 seconds in the OR before they stitched me back up - I mean, alone, in my room - with my husband ........and not a full audience.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

Message edited 7/31/2012 1:34:06 PM.

Re: BTDT- visitors in the hospital

Can I just say this is your choice, it is your body, your Csection, and your baby. I would let them know what I was comfortable with, if they have a problem with that than it's just that, their problem, not yours. You need to do what you need to do to make your birthing experience as enjoyable as possible.