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jame0801
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 428 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Yesterday I stopped at a 7-11 with my daughter. Parked next to me was a car that was left running with what looked like a 10 or 11 year old boy in the front seat, a baby (looked like a newborn) and a toddler (maybe around 2) in the back seat and they were alone. My daughter and I took a double take like why are they alone with the car running? And the car was parked nowhere near the front door (meaning u couldn't look out the front door of 7-11 and see the car at all). We went inside and there was only one woman in there so assumed it was the mom. She was taking her time, walking around, not checking outside etc. I didn't say anything. We go to check out and she walks to the front door and peeks out (although hadn't even checked out yet so she wasn't leaving yet). I couldn't help it I said u know u cant even see your car and u have an infant in there with the car running (not in a nasty way more concerned tone). She goes (nasty) oh thank u my older son is 13 so its all good and goes back into the store and walks around again. MAYBE if the car wasn't running and parked right out front I would feel differently but even my 10 year old took a double take at the situation so I know Im not crazy lol. Thoughts?
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Posted 7/27/18 8:49 AM  |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
If the car was running and probably locked with a teenager in the car - I don't see the big deal. I was babysitting infants at that age. I would not have a problem leaving my car running and locked and running in to a convenience store in this scenario.
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| Posted 7/27/18 8:53 AM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I don’t know, if her son is 13 I don’t think it’s a big deal. I used to babysit when I was 13. If the car was running and the doors were locked, I don’t see an issue with a responsible 13 year old waiting in the car with his younger siblings for 5 minutes. I also can’t blame the woman for not wanting to drag all those kids into 7-11.
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| Posted 7/27/18 8:55 AM |
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dianadrw
LIF Adult
Member since 5/06 2092 total posts
Name:
Me
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Honestly, it's really none of your business. If it was a baby or toddler (or dog for that matter) and the car wasn't on and it was hot, yes, it's your business. But in this case I never would've said anything. And if I had done it and someone said something to me I would've been nasty too.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:02 AM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I think that's perfectly fine and I wouldn't have said anything. It was a 7-11, not the mall. In that situation I wouldn't in a million years have expected her to explain her choice to me.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:07 AM |
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jame0801
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 428 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Ok thanks! I was just never a mom to leave my kids as babies in a running car alone so it seems crazy to me. I would always rather be a little inconvenienced and bring them in than leave them unattended for what was at least 10 minutes if not more without eyes on them. Thanks for the input and for what its worth I have never said anything to another mom before in my life lol this just worried me bc the child in the fron looked very young as well.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:09 AM |
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jamnmore
LIF Adult
Member since 6/16 989 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I see nothing wrong with what you described. A preteen in a car with his siblings is not an issue at all. And the thought of dragging all those kids into 7-11 is terrifying and I would take my time in 7-11 before going back out to the car.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:11 AM |
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klingklang77
kraftwerk!
Member since 7/06 11487 total posts
Name:
Völlig losgelöst
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Hmm. I think leaving the car running is not a good idea. A child can easily put that car into reverse. If they had the emergency brake on, then OK if they left it running.
That’s a hard one, but it is really none of your business.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:12 AM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by klingklang77
Hmm. I think leaving the car running is not a good idea. A child can easily put that car into reverse. If they had the emergency brake on, then OK if they left it running.
That’s a hard one, but it is really none of your business.
Most cars won’t move out of park if the key isn’t in the car, unless it’s an older model. Turning the car off would be worse, they would roast!
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:18 AM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
The car could be running and locked without even having the keys in it. I might have judged a little in my heads but I definitely wouldn't have said anything. If it was the two babies alone that would be another story but a 13 year old with them is totally different. At not much more than 13 I was not only babysitting but taking the kids for walks to public places alone.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:18 AM |
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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6791 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I see no problem with it. She had a 13 year old in the car, Id do the same. Honestly, you should mind your own business. Its not left it was an infant alone in a hot car. There was a teenager in the car with them and she was in 7-11, not the mall.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:21 AM |
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quasi3
LIF Adult
Member since 7/07 1764 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by MrsT809
The car could be running and locked without even having the keys in it. I might have judged a little in my heads but I definitely wouldn't have said anything. If it was the two babies alone that would be another story but a 13 year old with them is totally different. At not much more than 13 I was not only babysitting but taking the kids for walks to public places alone.
Exactly! I leave my car running without the keys in the car. You can’t move out of park and if you press the break the car shuts off.
I wouldn’t have said anything.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:21 AM |
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klingklang77
kraftwerk!
Member since 7/06 11487 total posts
Name:
Völlig losgelöst
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by klingklang77
Hmm. I think leaving the car running is not a good idea. A child can easily put that car into reverse. If they had the emergency brake on, then OK if they left it running.
That’s a hard one, but it is really none of your business.
Most cars won’t move out of park if the key isn’t in the car, unless it’s an older model. Turning the car off would be worse, they would roast!
Yes, but if you leave the car running, and you pull up on the emergency brake, then it won’t really go anywhere. That’s my experience anyway, but I drive a manual, so maybe I’m a bit confused.
And, of course, you don’t want them to roast. I still think I wouldn’t have said anything, but I would have watched the situation until the mom got back in the car.
I’ve had this here with dogs and they are so well trained here. People leave them tied up outside the supermarket. Sometimes there are some that are not on a leash, and I always wait to make sure the owner comes back.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:25 AM |
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mrsrainbow
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 1465 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I agree with the majority - not a big deal.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:34 AM |
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Jenn79
One more?
Member since 2/12 2410 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
I agree with everyone too. And there is no law as to age in ny for leaving a child in the car. A cop once told me as long as the child can call for help they are ok to stay in the car alone. So I guess it's discretion. A 13 yr old is more than capable.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:53 AM |
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NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!
Member since 5/11 10413 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Definitely not a big deal. At 13 I was babysitting and certainly would have sat in the car with my younger sister while my mom ran into a store.
Most cars today can be left on without the key in the car. My car needs the key in the car, but not in the ignition to start. I start it so it cools off/warms up while I'm still in the house, for example. Then the key stays on me while I run back and forth. It can't be driven without the key physically being in the car.
I would not have judged another mom or said anything. If the car was off and the kids were in a hot car, that's a totally different scenario.
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| Posted 7/27/18 9:54 AM |
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itsagoodlife
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/15 619 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by CookiePuss
If the car was running and probably locked with a teenager in the car - I don't see the big deal. I was babysitting infants at that age. I would not have a problem leaving my car running and locked and running in to a convenience store in this scenario.
Same
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| Posted 7/27/18 11:14 AM |
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
If an older child is in the car it’s not a big deal to me. I would never leave my 18 month olds in the car even when running
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| Posted 7/27/18 11:36 AM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Your heart was in the right place.
I prob wouldn't have said anything to the mother, after seeing the older boy in the front seat. But, I may have waited in the parking lot for a few until she came out of the store just to see her get back in the car.
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| Posted 7/27/18 12:00 PM |
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
This is an interesting article about judging parents for perceived risks - NPR Article .
I had read this article a while ago, but I found it particularly interesting after reading your post. In your post, you state what the mother was doing inside the store and it seems to make a difference in your judgment of her decision to leave the kids safely in the car.
Basically, unless you see a child in imminent danger, you should mind your own business. The kids were in a well ventilated car, and none of them were in the driver's seat trying to go for a joy ride. The mother knows her kids, and it's her job to make the risk assessment. I've numerous times wished I could leave my toddler and baby in the car for a minute instead of dragging them across a parking lot into a store, but I'm too worried some busybody would call the cops on me despite my children being in a completely low risk situation. They're in more danger while I'm driving the car, especially on Long Island, than they are sitting in a well ventilated parked car for a few minutes.
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| Posted 7/27/18 12:43 PM |
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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
a few weeks ago when I was shopping in Shoprite, I hear them page someone to come get their kid. So I figured a little kid was lost.
Nope..by the time I was checking out not much later, there is a boy, maybe like 11 ish looking for his dad. HIs dad left him in the car NOT RUNNING on a very hot day, windows up. Kid came in dripping with sweat.
In your situation Im not sure I would say anything b/c there was an older child and the car was running.
but I dont get how people leave babies in the backseat in hot cars..
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| Posted 7/27/18 12:43 PM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17792 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by jame0801
Ok thanks! I was just never a mom to leave my kids as babies in a running car alone so it seems crazy to me. I would always rather be a little inconvenienced and bring them in than leave them unattended for what was at least 10 minutes if not more without eyes on them. Thanks for the input and for what its worth I have never said anything to another mom before in my life lol this just worried me bc the child in the fron looked very young as well.
But they weren’t unattended - they were with their 13 year old sibling. If something wasn’t right - they could’ve alerted their mother - they probably even have a phone so they wouldn’t have to leave the car.
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| Posted 7/27/18 12:52 PM |
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jame0801
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 428 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Again, the boy to me looked around 9 or 10. I did not realize he was 13 until she said it. If he looked like a teenager I would never had said anything. Also, it was an older car so I could see the doors were unlocked. All good lesson learned . Keeping my mouth shut lol.
Message edited 7/27/2018 1:03:37 PM.
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| Posted 7/27/18 1:02 PM |
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jame0801
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/11 428 total posts
Name:
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Re: Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Posted by ali120206
Posted by jame0801
Ok thanks! I was just never a mom to leave my kids as babies in a running car alone so it seems crazy to me. I would always rather be a little inconvenienced and bring them in than leave them unattended for what was at least 10 minutes if not more without eyes on them. Thanks for the input and for what its worth I have never said anything to another mom before in my life lol this just worried me bc the child in the fron looked very young as well.
But they weren’t unattended - they were with their 13 year old sibling. If something wasn’t right - they could’ve alerted their mother - they probably even have a phone so they wouldn’t have to leave the car.
I did not know he was 13 until the mom said it. He looked around 9 or 10. Even my 10 year old looked surprised they were alone with a newborn in the car.
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| Posted 7/27/18 1:05 PM |
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Nickles01
LIF Infant
Member since 3/16 165 total posts
Name:
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Children left in car..curious of your thoughts
Mind Your Business.
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| Posted 7/27/18 1:06 PM |
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