Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Yes. Any question like that is rude.

When you are dating: So when are you going to get engaged?

When you are engaged: So when are you going to get married?

When you are married: So when are you going to have kids?

When you have a baby: So when are you going to have another?

I just answer- ONE AND DONE! Thanks!

That usually shuts them up.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I think it totally depends on how it is asked. It's the type of question that can go either way.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Posted by SummerMom

As someone dealing with recurring miscarriages, it breaks my heart when people ask me about having another. I would if I could.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Doesn't really bother me at all. Maybe if it was a total stranger but otherwise I think it is just a question people ask to seem engaged and interested in your life/family. No one means any harm by it. I just always tell people we haven't decided yet and leave it at that. Obviously if they are friends they will know along with the rest of our friends and family when and if we decide to announce an actual pregnancy.
ETA: it would be my perogative whether or not I get into specifics about difficulties in conceiving, marital issues, 1 and done etc. Almost every statement can "touch a cord" with someone. You tell someone they look great and lost weight but maybe you don't know they are struggling with depression or a medical issue. They don't mean any harm by it and in fact are trying to give a compliment.

Message edited 4/14/2014 4:53:10 PM.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Ehh it doesn't bother me. Some people are just curious.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Posted by Sparrow

I should clarify, I don't mind if family or close friends ask. It's the 'barely more than acquaintance' co-workers who drive me nuts.

What puts me over the edge is the completely unsolicited advice on what the best number of kids is. Especially from someone in her 60's who has no children. I just don't get the need to ram your opinion down my throat repeatedly.

Ok, vent over.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

So rude. I would never ask. I am 37 weeks pregnant now with DC #2 but my DD #1 is almost 5 so for the past 3 years so many people would ask when I am having my second. I always thought it was rude.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I get asked that all the time. I have two boys. But you know what I'm 35 and my kids are healthy. Everyone tells me I neeeeeed to have a girl. I don't feel that way. I got pregnant easily with both boys, they're healthy and everyone in my house is happy. I am more than content.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I think it is INCREDIBLY rude, unless you are actively discussing this with someone who is very close to you. One thing I have learned in the last few years is that there are so many variables in answering this question. I had preeclampsia and went through hell as well as having an infant in the NICU. My best friend is struggling with infertility and another lost a child at birth. Unless you know someone well enough to know the issues they may have struggles with- do NOT bring it up. Not everyone has the ability (physically or mentally) to have another child when they want to. People tend to not always wear their issues on their sleeve so it is best not to ask.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I don't know if I'd say it was rude; but it's definitely annoying and in my opinion none of their business. People have no idea what goes on personally. You may be trying for months (or longer) and the constant questions are frustrating. I never asked people that. MAYBE only my sister and that was it. Especially now having my own I never ask that question and I hate when I'm asked it by other people.

Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I find it rude that people would ask me WHEN I was having another, like I had to. When I said I was only having the one, they told me I HAD to have another - like it's a rule or something.

I understand curiosity but I don't understand people telling me what I should do or what I have to do. Everyone makes their own choices for their own reasons (or the choices are made for them in some cases) and I don't think anyone should question that.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I think it's rude. Close friends one thing but randoms

I hate hate when I get all the time. Ohh a boy and a girl. Shops closed them huh??

Yea you are talking about my who ha

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I do think its rude -- any of those questions are -- although at first it didnt bother me when people used to ask me. I would tell them not yet but we plan to try for #2 next year or e hope to be pregnant by the end of the year. But now after 3 miscarriages I really dont want any questions like that.

What I think is really really rude is comments about what you should/shouldnt do (having more, not having more, shooting for a particular birth month or age gap or gender). That is unbelievably rude.

Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

It's more annoying then rude. And god forbid I have a headache at work or just feel crappy. It's ' you must be preg'.
I eat something aside from normal at work, it's 'you must be preg'. I have a dr appt and need to leave early, it's 'you are preg'.
It's so fn annoying

Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

It depends on who is asking. Close friends and family, I don't think anything of it. It's not the place for an acquaintance to ask though. I don't know if I would call it rude, but its definitely in the MYOB category.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

It depends who asks and the context in which they are asking.
Acquaintances at work yes rude
Family members or close friends that ask because we are having a discussion about kids etc not rude

I am done done done so I don't mind answering the question. When people say well you never know that just pisses me off!

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

yes-I think it is very rude

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I don't see what the big deal is, not rude IMO. I'm pretty open about things though.

Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I think it depends on who is asking, but what I find rude are the comments that follow. It can never just be a question out of general curiosity, it is just a spring board for comments about how whatever you are doing is the wrong thing.

We are one and done and I'm getting real tired of having to defend my stance. I rarely engage, but I still find it very annoying. I (and everyone else) shouldn't be made to feel bad for what is a very personal decision

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

It doesn't bother me but I would never ask anyone (unless we were close and the topic came up) you never know what people are going through.

I do think it's rude when I do say that we are going for number 3 in the future and they say 'Why, trying for that boy??" (We have 2 DDs)

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I don't think the question in general is rude.

Re: Do you think it's rude for people to ask if you're going to have more kids?

I was at a friends bday party this weekend and was asked 3 different times. It's nosey more than anything. I don't care really and I answer honestly...maybe.