Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Red - totally totally true! Every word you said BUT I personally come here for entertainment and information. If people who are making up these "internet personas" hard to swallow, or making the experience less well... fun. Is that fair?

I know, I know... dont read the thread. But some are cleverly hidden and your emotions suck you in. Some topics just touch base with some people. The handicapped thread, the NYPD ones, the "too much HOFF" ones, the X-mas one... please it can go on and on.

It is true, you shouldnt think of people on an internet chat board as your friends, but if someone constantly has an opposing view of everything you do, chances are you wouldnt make the best friends in person either.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by Ophelia

Posted by Redhead


I think you are really pretty ignorant if you think what people post on here is an INKLING of who the person IS.

I think it's pretty ignorant to think that you are NOT seeing a snapshot of a person.

generally speaking , people tend to be more open and hold their tongues less when there is anonimity involved. they can be colder, harsher...maybe more honest ...

I think there are certain personality traits that come through as more dominant in a chat room and that may not necessarily be the case (silly, smarta$$, stupid, b1tchy) but I think that ignorance and intolerance are two things that are stigmatized by society, and therefore are things that we tend to try to keep better hidden.

perhaps "knowing" someone was a poor choice of words...b/c you are right...I "know" very few people on these boards. but I do see who they portray themselves to be ON these boards, and THAT is what I was commenting on. I probably will never "know" the girls on this board in such an intimate way as you describe...and maybe time would allow a more fully developed personality to unfold...but for the time being, with the info that I have, opinions are formed...details are remembered....

NOTHING is written in stone. I believe completely that things can be said out of context..in the heat of the battle.

but it doesn't make what happened, what I read, what I saw...any less interesting to me.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Ophelia...

You may THINK you know me, you may THINK you know someone else

BUT YOU DON"T KNOW...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by Redhead

Posted by MrsDiamondgrlie

Red - totally totally true! Every word you said BUT I personally come here for entertainment and information. If people who are making up these "internet personas" hard to swallow, or making the experience less well... fun. Is that fair?

I know, I know... dont read the thread. But some are cleverly hidden and your emotions suck you in. Some topics just touch base with some people. The handicapped thread, the NYPD ones, the "too much HOFF" ones, the X-mas one... please it can go on and on.

It is true, you shouldnt think of people on an internet chat board as your friends, but if someone constantly has an opposing view of everything you do, chances are you wouldnt make the best friends in person either.

Oh i am not saying that..

I think you can certainly find GREAT GREAT friends here

AND ABSOLUTELY can you be friendly with a bunch of people

I am glad to say that i have found people on here who i consider one of the BEST people i have ever met. AND ARE in fact REAL TRUE friends...

Gosh D you know i adore you

I am just floored that people think that they can "know" a person by things that are said in a heated debate...

OR THINK that they know others for NOT saying anything on these "heated debate" threads...

There could very well be NASTY, B!TCHY people on here...and they may just not say ANYTHING on any debate thread at all....DOES that make them NICE people now? Does that make you "know" them truly?

HELL NO.

I have to say i admire anyone who is willing to say how they feel regardless if i agree with them or not.

YOU WOULDN"T BELIEVE the banter that goes on in FM...

So i just think that people should get a clue...

ANd yes i do come here for "the fun of it"
Although i have certainly learned my lessons as well...

Message edited 11/28/2006 5:46:03 PM.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

i really oughta sue you for stealing the bite me thing

get your own material

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by CaptainCharisma424

i really oughta sue you for stealing the bite me thing

get your own material

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

I agree with what you are saying.

and I stand corrected about my choice of wording in the OP, b/c I agree that knowing someone and having an "idea' about someone are two completely different animals.

I still feel it was pretty sad how low it got at some points...not b/c people have their OWN opinions (God knows I have mine) but b/c of the lack of respect for the opinions that differ from their own.

you don't have to agree with everyone all of the time...what kind of a world would that be anyway...but too be hurtful...for what?? what is the point of that?

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

i agree...i don't understand why someone would intentionally be hurtful...

at least for no reason...

But i guess i missed the thread or the post to really comment on it

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Message edited 11/28/2006 6:12:29 PM.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

I have to admit I been on lif for 1 year and Liw for 1 year and I am just starting to Learn how to NOT care what people say on here and I have to Thank a couple of people on here"you know who you are" Because I was taking things to heart and getting upset alot, I came to the realization that By getting this way Its not going to get better,I need to accept things for the way it is and just get on with my life and just post and just join in the "FUN" Life is to short and After going to 2 Fundraisers& GTG'S, Meeting Most of the girls&guys I realize "wow what a bunch of nice people and you see How they really are which is Friendly,Kind and Honest.Again I want to "THANK" those girls for helping me realize this and I really Appreciate it!

Message edited 11/28/2006 6:21:28 PM.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by MrsT

Just because a man was out at 4 a.m. at a strip club with potential hookers on his wedding day does not mean he deserved to die - criminal record or not. His choice (or his friends choice) of bachelor party locations also does not make him a bad person. I realize that an officer was struck by a moving vehicle but even that does not make it okay to discharge 50 rounds into a moving car when there is no return fire. And even the NYPD stated that its against police policy to shoot at a moving vehicle when only the vehicle is being used as the weapon (no gun). People familiar with weapons (military mostly) fire several rounds then stop to assess the situation. I am sure the NYPD trains it's officers in a similar fashion.



The NYPD Rant blog is some of the most racist, unsupported information I have seen. I honestly hope that none of these bigots work in any of our communities although sadly I'm sure some of them do. DH has several friends - Black male friends - that are detectives for the NYPD and they have colleagues that share the views posted in that racist blog. DH's detective friends told him NOT to join the NYPD after he got out of the military because of racism and the blue wall of silence - which requires all officers to support the NYPD in all situations.


The media perpetuates much of the racial bias in this country. It makes the paper more often when a crime is committed by a minority. It's front page news. Just like when a police officer does something heroic it's on page 6 at the bottom rather than front page news This entire situation is sad for all involved.

Message edited 11/28/2006 7:37:22 PM.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by MrsKelly

Posted by MrsT

Just because a man was out at 4 a.m. at a strip club with potential hookers on his wedding day does not mean he deserved to die - criminal record or not. His choice (or his friends choice) of bachelor party locations also does not make him a bad person. I realize that an officer was struck by a moving vehicle but even that does not make it okay to discharge 50 rounds into a moving car when there is no return fire. And even the NYPD stated that its against police policy to shoot at a moving vehicle when only the vehicle is being used as the weapon (no gun). People familiar with weapons (military mostly) fire several rounds then stop to assess the situation. I am sure the NYPD trains it's officers in a similar fashion.



The NYPD Rant blog is some of the most racist, unsupported information I have seen. I honestly hope that none of these bigots work in any of our communities although sadly I'm sure some of them do. DH has several friends - Black male friends - that are detectives for the NYPD and they have colleagues that share the views posted in that racist blog. DH's detective friends told him NOT to join the NYPD after he got out of the military because of racism and the blue wall of silence - which requires all officers to support the NYPD in all situations.


The media perpetuates much of the racial bias in this country. It makes the paper more often when a crime is committed by a minority. It's front page news. Just like when a police officer does something heroic it's on page 6 at the bottom rather than front page news This entire situation is sad for all involved.

you're right, just because someone was at a strip club doesn't mean he deserves to die. just he left with one of the strippers even though he was getting married in just a few short hours doesn't mean he deserves to die. just because someone is driving under the influence doesn't mean he deserves to die. no one ever said he DESERVED to die. it's a gray situation. you weren't there. neither was i. but i know for a FACT that not all of the story is being relayed through the media. like when they're playing this guy up to be so stellar they never mention the fact that he was hooking up with the stripper. nor do they seem to mention someone else who was with him, in a tan jacket, that was seen fleeing the scene. they never found a gun, true. but that doesn't mean that there wasn't one. that doesn't mean the cops didn't have any reason behind their actions. if a cop is going to open fire, it's because he (or she) fears for their life. not just for sh!ts and giggles. just because they don't locate a weapon doesn't mean it didn't exist. it was said that one of the guys simulated a gun through their jacket... we are trained to treat that as a real weapon. if they know you're a cop, and they are going to pull that, what is going through their mind? and just where was that mystery man running to anyway? and with what? i'm not saying what happened was justified or not. i'm not saying it isn't a horrible situation... it is, from all ends. but people are so quick to pass judgement when the fact is they don't even know what happened. just watching the news doesn't mean you know. unless you were there or unless you know firsthand, then you really don't know what happened at all.
oh and about the bigots in the nypd that you hope don't work in your community... come on, the nypd is made up of over 30,000 uniformed police officers... don't you think there are going to be all kinds? like, if you didn't have any bigoted cops working i your community, that would prevent you from being surrounded by them? the nypd is not the only place with bigots.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by MrsT

Although it's now pulled that thread was one of the most disgraceful threads I have seen since I began posting on any of the Bridal Planner Group chat boards.

50 shots were fired at those men with no return gun fire. Although it takes about 1 minute to discharge 31 rounds from a 9 mm handgun (trigger must be pulled since its not an automatic weapon) 1 minute is a LONG TIME to be caught in a hail of bullets.

Just because a man was out at 4 a.m. at a strip club with potential hookers on his wedding day does not mean he deserved to die - criminal record or not. His choice (or his friends choice) of bachelor party locations also does not make him a bad person. I realize that an officer was struck by a moving vehicle but even that does not make it okay to discharge 50 rounds into a moving car when there is no return fire. And even the NYPD stated that its against police policy to shoot at a moving vehicle when only the vehicle is being used as the weapon (no gun). People familiar with weapons (military mostly) fire several rounds then stop to assess the situation. I am sure the NYPD trains it's officers in a similar fashion.

As for the criminal histories of those involved, for some reason learning that a person has a criminal history always gets brought out after the police murder a person and that seems to calm people And when the person has a stellar past and is college bound or something similar everyone is in an uproar. Why is the person with a criminal record cast aside as if that life is worthless Everyone makes mistakes in life.

The NYPD Rant blog is some of the most racist, unsupported information I have seen. I honestly hope that none of these bigots work in any of our communities although sadly I'm sure some of them do. DH has several friends - Black male friends - that are detectives for the NYPD and they have colleagues that share the views posted in that racist blog. DH's detective friends told him NOT to join the NYPD after he got out of the military because of racism and the blue wall of silence - which requires all officers to support the NYPD in all situations.

Blogs like that one are the reason I fear for the life of my husband, father, brother and other male relatives daily. My husband is stopped constantly simply because he is driving a Mercedes E 320.....presumably "too nice" so he must be a criminal since he also has dreadlocks. He is never ticketed and all the paperwork is always in order.

The perception that minorities commit the majority of crime in this country is a joke. I majored in criminal justice and studied all of this. Nobody ever mentions the number of times a non-minority is arrested but does not have to go through the system for whatever reason i.e., family member called in a favor, cop knew the person or the family and gave the person a pass, the person had no rap sheet so they get a pass (typically more than one pass since they did not get processed the first time), they are presumed innocent because they are not a minority etc.

Racial profiling is alive and well and we all have heard the stories of minorities being disproportionately stopped and searched. In one study of the NJ Turnpike it was found that while African Americans made up 13.5 percent of highway users and 15 percent of the speeders, they represented 35 percent of those stopped by police. My husband was stopped on the NJ Turnpike at least 20 times all by white officers and he was NEVER ticketed. DH was even stopped by the same officer twice in the same week and DH reminded him that he already was stopped that same week and DH told the officer all about the officers military duty stations since they had discussed it earlier in the week when DH was stopped. All of this since DH was driving his Mercedes CLK 430 and presumed to be a criminal.

Because of racial profiling minorities are more often processed and sentenced so of course the numbers are skewed. That does not mean minorites commit more crime it just means they are more often caught since minorites are always looked upon as a suspect. I know that I have personally been followed around a high end store or two (or 10) and as a suspect as if I were going to steal something. Meanwhile the real shoplifters are getting away with thousands in merchandise. I'm shocked that Winona Ryder was even processed for shoplifting - then again she is a celebrity so that was sensationalized.

There have been tons of studies on this and several by minorities who are so fair skinned that they are thought to be white. One very fair skinned Black man (saw this on t.v. recently) said he and another darker Black friend were stopped for a search while walking in their neighborhood late night. Not sure if there was even probable caused but the fair skinned man was not searched or handcuffed at all while his much darker friend was cuffed and questioned just for walking in their own neighborhood.

I'm amazed at all of this racial bias since I know several white men and women who were released without processing for various crimes including possession of cocaine. My own personal revelation came when my African American cousin was murdered at age 18 by a 17 year old WHITE kid (and former friend) who fled GA and came to NYC to only be arrested for trying to rob a woman at knifepoint. That incident did not make the paper though - at least not the NYC paper. And nobody ever mentioned the kid was white but had it been a minority criminal it would have been all over the news as "typical Black on Black crime".

The cops are the first stop in the system and if they are biased in arresting minorites more often then of course when the case gets to an ADA the person is more likely to be a minority - hence the numbers are skewed so it appears that minorites commit more crime when its just NOT TRUE.

The media perpetuates much of the racial bias in this country. It makes the paper more often when a crime is committed by a minority. It's front page news. Just like when a police officer does something heroic it's on page 6 at the bottom rather than front page news This entire situation is sad for all involved.

Posted by MrsKelly

you're right, just because someone was at a strip club doesn't mean he deserves to die. just he left with one of the strippers even though he was getting married in just a few short hours doesn't mean he deserves to die. just because someone is driving under the influence doesn't mean he deserves to die. no one ever said he DESERVED to die. it's a gray situation. you weren't there. neither was i. but i know for a FACT that not all of the story is being relayed through the media. like when they're playing this guy up to be so stellar they never mention the fact that he was hooking up with the stripper. nor do they seem to mention someone else who was with him, in a tan jacket, that was seen fleeing the scene. they never found a gun, true. but that doesn't mean that there wasn't one. that doesn't mean the cops didn't have any reason behind their actions. if a cop is going to open fire, it's because he (or she) fears for their life. not just for sh!ts and giggles. just because they don't locate a weapon doesn't mean it didn't exist. it was said that one of the guys simulated a gun through their jacket... we are trained to treat that as a real weapon. if they know you're a cop, and they are going to pull that, what is going through their mind? and just where was that mystery man running to anyway? and with what? i'm not saying what happened was justified or not. i'm not saying it isn't a horrible situation... it is, from all ends. but people are so quick to pass judgement when the fact is they don't even know what happened. just watching the news doesn't mean you know. unless you were there or unless you know firsthand, then you really don't know what happened at all.
oh and about the bigots in the nypd that you hope don't work in your community... come on, the nypd is made up of over 30,000 uniformed police officers... don't you think there are going to be all kinds? like, if you didn't have any bigoted cops working i your community, that would prevent you from being surrounded by them? the nypd is not the only place with bigots.

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn girls....no need to keep quoting each other

makes for a hard read

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

MrsT you should run for mayor, you'd get my vote, you speak the truth

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by Redhead

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn girls....no need to keep quoting each other

makes for a hard read

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by MrsT

As everyone from LIW knows, I tend to be verbose

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by MrsT

Posted by Redhead

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn girls....no need to keep quoting each other

makes for a hard read

My bad. Bits and pieces of my original post were taken out of context. I hate that so I quoted my entire initial comments. As everyone from LIW knows, I tend to be verbose

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by Eva Luna

Posted by MrsT

As everyone from LIW knows, I tend to be verbose

You, verbose, I would have never thought?!

Re: It's funny how "hot topics" bring out the worst in people...

Posted by Redhead

Posted by MrsT

Posted by Redhead

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn girls....no need to keep quoting each other

makes for a hard read

My bad. Bits and pieces of my original post were taken out of context. I hate that so I quoted my entire initial comments. As everyone from LIW knows, I tend to be verbose

well rock on....i agree with the majority of what you said

one question...if the police officers that were primarily involved of the minorty race...
do you still find what happened racist?

just curious