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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
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Posted 7/14/11 7:28 AM  |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Honestly- never.
Not until like later high school
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| Posted 7/14/11 8:04 AM |
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sleepie76
enjoying every minute
Member since 12/07 3881 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I walked home alone @ 3rd grade. It was 3 straight blocks.
What scared me the most of that story is that it was a neighbor. I thought how I often took rides from my neighbors when walking home from school. Never thought once about it. They were my neighbors, I knew them.
I guess you have to tell your kids to avoid strangers AND people you know ?
sooo sad
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| Posted 7/14/11 8:06 AM |
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skinny
3 boys and a princess!
Member since 11/08 8178 total posts
Name:
Momma
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I work in Brooklyn Heights-----a VERY safe neighborhood. I see very young kids (maybe 8 or 9) walking alone to school each morning. It scares me!!!
I won't let my kids walk alone probably until high school---maybe even longer than that!
We live in such a crazy, sick world. 
Message edited 7/14/2011 9:18:40 AM.
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| Posted 7/14/11 8:20 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I think a distinction needs to be made though. this guy...it doesn't look like he actually knew the kid or the family, but they are an extrememly tight knit community and are taught they can trust their own. that they are "safe" with their own people.
this boy did what his parents taught him. I cannot imagine how shaken they ALL feel. as a community. everything they believe about themselves as a people has to be rocked to their very core.
it's not a situation where we tell our kids "don't talk to strangers...don't trust anyone...never get into someone's care" I am sure they tell the same to their children for people they consider strangers/outsiders. but they usually implicitly trust "their own." this man would not have fallen into the category of "stranger" even though he was.
his feet. his tiny little feet. in the ******* FREEZER. I am sick. so so so very sick.
rest in peace, sweet little darling. I hope the angels led your precious soul to heaven.
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| Posted 7/14/11 8:48 AM |
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TheDivineMrsM
2 girls 4 me!
Member since 8/08 7878 total posts
Name:
Mama mama mama....
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
When she's going to college, I'll think about it. I live in a safe neighborhood, but there are nuts everywhere.
Seriously, maybe middle school.
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| Posted 7/14/11 9:15 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I am going to go out on a limb here...I feel anything under 12 should be classified as child endangerment.
Just too risky.
My mind goes to a place with Josh.
The fear that must run through these kids...makes me feel faint.
The image of my baby boy in the back of a car alone with a kidnapper going to God knows where makes my heart stop.
I don't care what town anyone lives in...sickos come in all forms.
I live in the sweetest little sub ever. This kid is never out of my sight.
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| Posted 7/14/11 9:53 AM |
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sj-girl
Happy Family of 4
Member since 5/08 5654 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
With all these horrible stories lately. I dont think DS will ever be allowed to walk home.
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| Posted 7/14/11 9:54 AM |
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FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic
Member since 6/05 10212 total posts
Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I am so torn by all this. While I think a part of growing up is learning about independence, the momma bear part of me wants to hold onto them forever and protect them.
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| Posted 7/14/11 2:24 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
My stepdaughter did around 11-12, so Cailen will probably be the same....
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| Posted 7/14/11 2:55 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by headoverheels
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
wait...? Did I miss something here? That boy had autism?
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| Posted 7/14/11 2:58 PM |
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BAM 2009
I am who I am!!!
Member since 5/09 6081 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by headoverheels
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
wait...? Did I miss something here? That boy had autism?
I never heard anything about him having autism either... The problem IMO was that the boy lived in a tight knit, non-violent neighborhood where every one trusts every one..Can't live like that in this world!!! It jut takes one sicko to change everything...It can happen anywhere at anytime. The little boy went with the murderer because he was taught to trust everyone. The guy looked like everyone he knows! Even though you live in a "nice" area, your child still needs to know about strangers... It is great that a kid is not shy around anyone, but they need to know the dangers of going with someone they don't know!
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| Posted 7/14/11 3:05 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by headoverheels
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
wait...? Did I miss something here? That boy had autism?
http://www.wsbt.com/news/wpix-missing-boy-body,0,5251035.story
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| Posted 7/14/11 3:07 PM |
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BAM 2009
I am who I am!!!
Member since 5/09 6081 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by headoverheels
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
wait...? Did I miss something here? That boy had autism?
http://www.wsbt.com/news/wpix-missing-boy-body,0,5251035.story
That is the only news story that has said anything about autism...strange!
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| Posted 7/14/11 3:10 PM |
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ARIELSMOM
Love my Babes
Member since 8/05 5889 total posts
Name:
MEREDITH
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
my DD is 10.5 and going into the 6th grade. She keeps asking me if she can walk home from school this year. i told her the answer was still no- for multiple reasons, she doesnt have a walking buddy, and i dont feel like she is mature enough yet, i still have to reminder her to look both ways when we walk to the park & stuff. I told her we could talk about it again half way through the year.
Honestly, i dont think until she is older, especially alone. im not a fan of kids walking along. if she had a friend to walk with, it would be different- maybe 7th grade.
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| Posted 7/14/11 3:16 PM |
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KennysMommy
Never knew LOVE like it before
Member since 3/10 2640 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
It's sad b/c this boy got lost and asked for help - so he was obviously too young to walk on his own since he didn't know how to get home. I think 12 is about the youngest I'd allow DS to be on his own like that.
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| Posted 7/14/11 3:20 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by headoverheels
Knowing nothing about autism I have to ask... was letting him walk home alone a bigger risk than letting a typical 8 year old boy walk home alone? Because I feel like that's an important distinction.
I would probably say middle school age, or at least old enough to really understand the no talking to strangers rule.
wait...? Did I miss something here? That boy had autism?
http://www.wsbt.com/news/wpix-missing-boy-body,0,5251035.story
Wow, this is the first time I saw an article reference he had autism.
I have to be honest. It was my first thought aft hearing that story, and then I felt even more suspicious when. Aw that picture of him. They couldn't find one picture of him for the poster where he was looking straight at the camera? That made me wonder.
I was also troubled by a few things. Yes, this boy grew up in a sheltered community, so he may lack the street smarts of other kids, and he may not have been taught stranger danger the way other kids may have because of his tight community.... But his lack of problem solving skills troubled me. He didn't look up at the street signs. He didn't think it was odd that he had to wait for a man to pay his dentist bill, and stood for almost ten minutes without thinking maybe his mom would be getting worried how late he is at that point. I fee a typical eight yr old would think, to hell with this, let me ask someone else for directions if I have to stand here now.
Also, they aren't mentioning this boy that much. Wen they talk about a child who has been slaughtered, the media talks about how much he loved super heroes, how he wanted to be a doctor when he grew up, that he was fascinated by butterflies. They say he was shy and devout. That's it. And it's not a matter of privacy in my mind because they gave gruesome details about his death. If I were his mother, I would want people to know who he was, not what his body parts looked like when he was found.
It makes me wonder if he ha some kind of disability that they don't want people to know about because then they will hear how awful they are for letting a child with autism out alone on the streets (and, I hate myself for saying this, but I would agree)
A child with autism is not safe on a street until he is taught all the skills needed to address getting lost, talking to strangers, who to talk to (a store owner versus a random man), and never, ever, EVER go into a person's car. Ever. And those skills need to be role played and practiced. My colleagues have staged "strangers" (friends of theirs that the child doesn't know) to approach their students to then model what to say and do. One even had a child's moth walk away in a supermarket so he wold get lost, and then teach him what to do. A practice run on a route the Friday before his walk home (2 days before he would do it independently) is just not enough.
My heart aches over this. And the fact that he possibly could have been on the spectrum makes my knees weak. My entire life is devoted to teaching these guys life skills so they will hopefully not get preyed on.
This story is killing me.
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| Posted 7/14/11 5:02 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Sorry for typos.... On my iPad and typing passionately. You get the gist.
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| Posted 7/14/11 5:03 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
we started letting Aidan walk home from the bus when he was 9 (in fourth grade) In our old neighborhood 4th & 5th grade was the "norm" for kids walking around...
In our new neighborhood, Brooklyn, it seems like 9. 10 is also the general age kids are out by themselves. Aidan would often walk home with a huge group of friends and often walked home (around 5-6 o'clock) by himself from his after-school program.
Next year, he will be taking the subway to middle school (which scares the cr@p out of me) but he will be with a group of friends.
DH & I are reconsidering whether or not we will let him walk to & from the park or summer camp by himself. This story REALLY hits home... I trust my kid but he's pretty naive...
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| Posted 7/14/11 5:09 PM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
and for the people that are saying "I would never let them walk that young"
I have to say... you never know how you will feel when they are *that* age.
I remember thinking I would NEVER let my kid walk home by himself at 9 but you would be surprised at how mature they really are. We just have to teach them to be safe... not to talk to strangers, if anyone approaches them to run into a store...
We can't raise them in bubbles, but DH & I are DEFINITELY going to talk to Aidan about what happened and rethink how much freedom we will allow him this summer.
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| Posted 7/14/11 5:16 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
How times have changed.
I was a latch key child. I walked home alone in elementary school both on and off base. In and out of bad neighborhoods. Even chased home and beaten up but never a worry for strangers because I stayed away from them.
With AJ, her elementary is a block and a half from home, we’ll walk together. Her middle school is a 5min drive down to very busy roads about 3mi away so no, she’ll be driven to and from. It’s a concern since I don’t get off work until 5pm, so it’s a bridge I’ll cross when I get there. Her High school is 10mins away up one of those same busy streets. So no way to that either. She can take a bus.
So walking home? Never. Heck I live off the busy road and a bit of green belt between the neighborhood and that street but really NOTHING up and down the street until you get to one of the other major roads. You NEED to drive. No walking.
that story kills me.. worse is seeing him just so happily walking along... makes you realize he had no idea how little life he had left
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| Posted 7/14/11 6:40 PM |
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OffWithHerHead23
Keep passing the open windows
Member since 10/06 3627 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
DS is 10. He walks to friend's houses by himself... a few short blocks away. He calls me when he gets there. I feel like he is mature enough to do that. He knows to never talk to strangers, and he knows people in every other or every 3rd house on the way to everywhere he goes by himself.
This story is horrible, but I know my kid and the story hasn't made me rethink Nick doing this.
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| Posted 7/14/11 7:16 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
My oldest will be 8, He doesn't leave my sight EVER and hes not going to in 1,2 or even 3 years. I am in no way smothering or overprotective of him but there is no need for him to go off riding his bike, walking, whatever....I'm sorry there's just too many freaks out there in today's world and I'd rather protect him as much as I can while I still can cause lord knows he's gonna fight me once he hits puberty age.
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| Posted 7/14/11 7:41 PM |
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2boys1girl
and one more girl on the way!
Member since 5/10 2954 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by HeathKernandez
and for the people that are saying "I would never let them walk that young"
I have to say... you never know how you will feel when they are *that* age.
I remember thinking I would NEVER let my kid walk home by himself at 9 but you would be surprised at how mature they really are. We just have to teach them to be safe... not to talk to strangers, if anyone approaches them to run into a store...
We can't raise them in bubbles, but DH & I are DEFINITELY going to talk to Aidan about what happened and rethink how much freedom we will allow him this summer.
My son is that age and no matter how mature I think that he is none of that matters in that short minute some pedophile on the street wants them, if a grown man wants to take a kid they can definitely overpower them and throw them in their cars or whatever...As much as I trust my son I don't trust strangers.
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| Posted 7/14/11 7:44 PM |
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KellyNYC
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/05 650 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by HeathKernandez
and for the people that are saying "I would never let them walk that young"
I have to say... you never know how you will feel when they are *that* age.
Previously I would have agreed with this but after hearing about all these terrible stories I really hope this feeling of "I would never..." sticks with me when the time comes to make that decision. Right now, I'm all for the bubble and plan to keep her in it until she's at least a late teen.
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| Posted 7/14/11 7:48 PM |
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