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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Like I said. My back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have another back up plan. See where I am going with this? I have a LARGE family. HUGE! Some in the same district, same school. Don't you worry.
No worries over here-lol!!
I am glad that you have a large family that will be able to help you, I really am.
I am just saying it is hard to predict the future as you just don't know what will happen and how you will feel then.
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Posted 7/15/11 3:30 PM  |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Hazel you really seem to be overly concerned about what will happen to Sweets kids 
Not really-lol
Just speaking from experience that you really don't know when your children are small what you will actually do when they are older.
I don't know how it will be when my kids are 5-10 years older right now either. I take it day to day and the decisions get harder but I also know that I have to let my kids "go" also as they get older and I can't imagine telling a 16, 17 or 18 yr. old that they can't walk alone-lol.
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| Posted 7/15/11 3:32 PM |
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Sweets13
Bella Bambini
Member since 5/05 9300 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by headoverheels
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Exactly. NOT everyone can have a backup plan and not everyone is able to be a SAHM. Even though YOU might not be able to do so doesn't mean other's can't.
For those of us who are able to have backup plans doesn't mean we are sheltering our children. If that is what gets you through the day...then keep telling yourself that.
The backup plan you might have now might not be available at that time though.
It is very hard to predict what you (in general) will do when your child is a tween or teenager when they are only babies or toddles or even in elementary school.
Like I said. My back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have another back up plan. See where I am going with this? I have a LARGE family. HUGE! Some in the same district, same school. Don't you worry.
Hazel you really seem to be overly concerned about what will happen to Sweets kids
I know. I am going to make her one of my back up's..just in case. 
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| Posted 7/15/11 3:37 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by headoverheels
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Exactly. NOT everyone can have a backup plan and not everyone is able to be a SAHM. Even though YOU might not be able to do so doesn't mean other's can't.
For those of us who are able to have backup plans doesn't mean we are sheltering our children. If that is what gets you through the day...then keep telling yourself that.
The backup plan you might have now might not be available at that time though.
It is very hard to predict what you (in general) will do when your child is a tween or teenager when they are only babies or toddles or even in elementary school.
Like I said. My back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have a back up plan and THAT back up plan will have another back up plan. See where I am going with this? I have a LARGE family. HUGE! Some in the same district, same school. Don't you worry.
Hazel you really seem to be overly concerned about what will happen to Sweets kids
I know. I am going to make her one of my back up's..just in case.
Great :)
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| Posted 7/15/11 3:40 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Wow! So glad to see I got quoted a gazillion times!
YES, I am a SAHM!
I hope and pray to work PT when my kids start school!
Dont you worry! I'll work it out!
I will be home to get them to school and be home to get them from school!
Even if it's working in McDs (hey, did it before and they are VERY flexible), I'd find something!
Message edited 7/15/2011 4:24:30 PM.
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| Posted 7/15/11 4:23 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by lvdolphins
Wow! So glad to see I got quoted a gazillion times!
YES, I am a SAHM!
I hope and pray to work PT when my kids start school!
Dont you worry! I'll work it out!
I will be home to get them to school and be home to get them from school!
Even if it's working in McDs (hey, did it before and they are VERY flexible), I'd find something!
No worries 
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| Posted 7/15/11 4:31 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
It was MANY years ago but my mom paid for a nanny until we were 11 yo. My mom was a FTWM until I was 11 yo. We were not allowed to have a key to come home. She hired nannies within 1-2 blocks of the school. My sister and I had to walk together. Yet, we were walking to the nanny anyway. My mom did not want someone to follow us to our apartment and take us into the apartment.
My dad showed up unexpectledly at the nanny before we were due to arrive. The ONE day my sister and I took our sweet time to go to the nanny. Talking to other kids outside the school. My father made the nanny cry that she did not care that we were late. He actually embushed her (ANOTHER STORY....!!!). We never got late afterward. We felt so bad we put her in trouble.
My son is autistic. He will NEVER come home alone!!!!
Message edited 7/15/2011 4:53:16 PM.
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| Posted 7/15/11 4:52 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by CrankyPants
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by lvdolphins
My elementary school was 2 blocks away!
I walked, I think in 3rd grade with my brother and ALL the neighborhood kids!
We met on my corner.
We were NOT allowed to go just by ourselves!
For my kids, we live close to elementary and Jr. high, but, I WILL be walking with them, or driving them.
If in Jr High they want to go alone, well, I'll be right behind them!
We live far from the high school, so, for that, they'll be bussed!
What if you are not available though to walk right behind them?
She is a SAHM so I am sure she will have no problem walking behind them.
So SAHM's don't do anything else but wait for their kids to come home? 
But even if you are not a SAHM, would you leave for work before your kids get the school bus? I don't know, the way DH and I have it planned one of us will be home until the bus picks them up and then one of us or a grandparent or friggin Alice from the Brady Bunch will be there to meet the school bus.
I don't think Dawn's comment is extraordinary. I can't see leaving my 10 or 12 year old at home alone in the morning before school. Honestly, I can't see leaving my 17 year old home alone before school either-I know the trouble my brothers got into but I guess it depends on the kid.
I am home now when both kids leave. If not, the youngest would go to before care and there has been times when the oldest has tests and leaves after me.
Neither my dh or myself are able to be home when they both get out of school (unless the oldest has after school things).
Dawn is a SAHM. If she said that she will be following her child to and from school, I believe her. Why? because she CAN!!!!!! No where did I say that SAHM's only wait home for their kids. That dilusional remark came from YOU!
I never said I did not believe her. I am sure the child is not going to like that when they get to middle school though. I can ASSURE you they are not going to like it. lol
Too bad if they don't like it.
lol...do you have older children?
I do. And its still too bad they don't like it.
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| Posted 7/15/11 4:57 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
This is what happened to a former co-worker. FTWM, single mom of 2 teenagers. One being 12 yo at the time.
The DD had instructions to come from the bus, go directly in the house, lock the house and call her mom right away that she was home.
One day she did not call. We work together so I always knew when her DD was supposed to call. And one day she did not call.
My co-worker was so busy and I mentioned to her if she had heard from her DD. I used to pick up her phone line a lot. I had not heard from her. She had not heard the call either. She realized it was 30 minutes after the call she was supposed to receive. She called the house for about 45 minutes. Becoming more distraugh every minute passing by. Calling the neighbor to check if her DD had fallen asleep. She banged on the door, nothing.
In tears, my co-worker left work to look for her DD.
It turned out to be OK. Her DD forgot her house keys that morning and took a nap in the back porch on one of the bench that the neighbor could not have seen.
Her DD got in so much trouble but it ALL made us aware in the office of "what if it was my kid". Other parents were very concerned/worried when she left to look for her DD.
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| Posted 7/15/11 5:06 PM |
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luvsbob4603
To a healthy 2013
Member since 5/05 21840 total posts
Name:
To a brand new year to a healthier me
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I'm not a mother "but" when I was younger I was allowed to walk to my friends house but I had to call when I got there. If I had school aged kids and I couldn't be home my mom or sister would help me or I would be home to get them. Dawn is a GREAT mom and she will work it out to be home to get or kids or if Aunt Roseann is available to do it I will be there to help her out!! ;) I think a good school age for a kid to walk by themselves is when they are 15 or 16 high school or when they're driving.
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| Posted 7/16/11 4:17 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Never! I don't care how he feels, or how hard they fight me on this....I WILL WALK/DRIVE THEM! I was a walker from 6th grade on and I remember guys stopping and saying crazy ish to me, some even asking me to get in their cars. It's a much different world now; and it wasn't exactly safe back then either
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| Posted 7/16/11 7:30 PM |
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GenLCSW
Baby # 3 is here!!!
Member since 7/05 21138 total posts
Name:
Genna
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
never
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| Posted 7/16/11 8:29 PM |
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Alone, probably never. I would say around 14 if they are walking with friends.
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| Posted 7/16/11 9:50 PM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by CrankyPants
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Sweets13
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by lvdolphins
My elementary school was 2 blocks away!
I walked, I think in 3rd grade with my brother and ALL the neighborhood kids!
We met on my corner.
We were NOT allowed to go just by ourselves!
For my kids, we live close to elementary and Jr. high, but, I WILL be walking with them, or driving them.
If in Jr High they want to go alone, well, I'll be right behind them!
We live far from the high school, so, for that, they'll be bussed!
What if you are not available though to walk right behind them?
She is a SAHM so I am sure she will have no problem walking behind them.
So SAHM's don't do anything else but wait for their kids to come home?
But even if you are not a SAHM, would you leave for work before your kids get the school bus? I don't know, the way DH and I have it planned one of us will be home until the bus picks them up and then one of us or a grandparent or friggin Alice from the Brady Bunch will be there to meet the school bus.
I don't think Dawn's comment is extraordinary. I can't see leaving my 10 or 12 year old at home alone in the morning before school. Honestly, I can't see leaving my 17 year old home alone before school either-I know the trouble my brothers got into but I guess it depends on the kid.
I am home now when both kids leave. If not, the youngest would go to before care and there has been times when the oldest has tests and leaves after me.
Neither my dh or myself are able to be home when they both get out of school (unless the oldest has after school things).
Dawn is a SAHM. If she said that she will be following her child to and from school, I believe her. Why? because she CAN!!!!!! No where did I say that SAHM's only wait home for their kids. That dilusional remark came from YOU!
I never said I did not believe her. I am sure the child is not going to like that when they get to middle school though. I can ASSURE you they are not going to like it. lol
Too bad if they don't like it.
It seems (and correct me if I am wrong) that most of the mom's who are sure that their middle schooler can not walk home alone do not have school-aged children ( K and up) yet and I think that when you do get there your mind may very well change. When my son was a baby I could not imagine that he could play basketball in the front yard with his friend without me there...or that he could learn to cross a street or go through a parking lot without holding my hand...but he does all that now. And its shocking but I need to let him grow and learn and become more independent even if it scares the **** out of me... and honestly I could not imagine not allowing my middle schooler to take a short walk with his friends. Its unbelievable, but our kids grow up and we change our minds... generally I am seeing that's how it goes. DS is 7.
Message edited 7/17/2011 8:32:11 AM.
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| Posted 7/17/11 8:25 AM |
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Elizabeth
Mom of Three
Member since 9/05 7900 total posts
Name:
"MOMMY!!!"
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
I didn't read any of the replies except the last page but right now I don't picture a scenario where I would let them anytime soon. My oldest is going to 9 in October and he is very impulsive. No trust here. I try in small dribs & drabs but it's very hard. You have to know your child. I see kids in the neighborhood that I know are his age on their own, it's really the parent knowing their child. Even with what happened to Leiby Kletzky, I still can't say that all children that age cannot be on their own to walk a few blocks. It really depends on the child. Not mine though, at least not in the near future. I did let him go to the bathroom himself at Target yesterday while I was at the other side of the store (not the far corner of the store but 10 aisles up in a straight path). I wanted to stay put and wait for him to come back but I ended up walking towards the bathrooms. He looked a little disappointed that I was not back where he left me but I made sure he knew he did good but it's hard for me. He is aware of the Leiby Kletzky story so he seemed to understand why.
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| Posted 7/17/11 11:44 AM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
probably middle school age as long as they are responsible kids. they need to grow up and learn responsibility at some point
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| Posted 7/17/11 1:10 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
No. They live maybe 2 blocks away from where they will go to Hebrew school and it would be very easy for me to have them walk. No friggin way - not when last October, "White Pride" stickers graced the stop sign right near the temple.
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| Posted 7/17/11 1:37 PM |
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hotsauce345
my love, my life, my son
Member since 1/09 4169 total posts
Name:
Melody
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
probably not until he's 15...I know alot of people who give their children keys and have them come home on their own...but god forbiid something happened...we are legally responsible for them. legally they need supervision...and i really believe there is a damn good reason why as we can see from the news lately
ETA: we had a girl living in our home with a 9 yo...she gave her 9 yo keys and had her walk about 4 blocks from school to an empty home. as soon as i found out she did it i had to sit her down...because this house is in our name...and if anything ever happened say...she accidentally started a fire or house was broken into. that could pose all sorts of liabilities for us as homeowners. her answer to me was "oh i'm not worried about it...she's really responsible!" well at 9yo i was one of the most responsible, mature kids you'd ever meet bc i was always hanging out with the adults, carrying on adult conversations, cleaning, doing my own laundry etc....well at 9yo i accidentally burned my house down. accidents happen...and there are alot of crazies out there...kids need supervision these days...its not like it was back in the day.
Message edited 7/17/2011 1:57:06 PM.
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| Posted 7/17/11 1:48 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Right. You can teach a child how to walk from point A to point B but emergencies and crises happen in between those two points that mommy and daddy may or may not have taught their children and no matter how "responsible" a child may be, they are still a child and do not know how to respond appropriate to all crises. Shoot I am going to be 41 in a couple of weeks and i get panic attacks every now and again. What happens if a young child does?
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| Posted 7/17/11 2:07 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
It seems (and correct me if I am wrong) that most of the mom's who are sure that their middle schooler can not walk home alone do not have school-aged children ( K and up) yet and I think that when you do get there your mind may very well change. When my son was a baby I could not imagine that he could play basketball in the front yard with his friend without me there...or that he could learn to cross a street or go through a parking lot without holding my hand...but he does all that now. And its shocking but I need to let him grow and learn and become more independent even if it scares the **** out of me... and honestly I could not imagine not allowing my middle schooler to take a short walk with his friends. Its unbelievable, but our kids grow up and we change our minds... generally I am seeing that's how it goes. DS is 7.
I am a mom of a almost 3rd grader (almost 8) and middle schooler (a month away from being 13) and ITA with you. It seems like that when you have small children that you would never let them do this or that but yes, they grow up and you realize that your mind does change for many reasons.
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| Posted 7/17/11 4:11 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by MrsMeloyellow
probably not until he's 15...I know alot of people who give their children keys and have them come home on their own...but god forbiid something happened...we are legally responsible for them. legally they need supervision...and i really believe there is a damn good reason why as we can see from the news lately
ETA: we had a girl living in our home with a 9 yo...she gave her 9 yo keys and had her walk about 4 blocks from school to an empty home. as soon as i found out she did it i had to sit her down...because this house is in our name...and if anything ever happened say...she accidentally started a fire or house was broken into. that could pose all sorts of liabilities for us as homeowners. her answer to me was "oh i'm not worried about it...she's really responsible!" well at 9yo i was one of the most responsible, mature kids you'd ever meet bc i was always hanging out with the adults, carrying on adult conversations, cleaning, doing my own laundry etc....well at 9yo i accidentally burned my house down. accidents happen...and there are alot of crazies out there...kids need supervision these days...its not like it was back in the day.
Accidents do happen but 15 seems kind of old to start having your children stay at home alone by themselves. IME 10,11 is the starting age. I don't mean all day, everyday but a few hours here and there. Sometimes it is not possible to be home when they get home for school or other things. Personally I LOVE that I don't have to take my older child every place I go.
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| Posted 7/17/11 4:15 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by Goldi0218
Right. You can teach a child how to walk from point A to point B but emergencies and crises happen in between those two points that mommy and daddy may or may not have taught their children and no matter how "responsible" a child may be, they are still a child and do not know how to respond appropriate to all crises. Shoot I am going to be 41 in a couple of weeks and i get panic attacks every now and again. What happens if a young child does?
That is why you don't leave your child until you are 100% certain they will be ok and I am not sure how long people are speaking about and how far you would be from home.
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| Posted 7/17/11 4:16 PM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Accidents do happen but 15 seems kind of old to start having your children stay at home alone by themselves. IME 10,11 is the starting age. I don't mean all day, everyday but a few hours here and there. Sometimes it is not possible to be home when they get home for school or other things. Personally I LOVE that I don't have to take my older child every place I go.
Maybe you guys are right and I'll think differently when my kids are that age, but I know plenty of 9 and 10 year olds now and I can't imagine them being left home alone.
Honestly, I don't even use sitters who are still in high school. Just my opinion, but I can't see it happening in my family.
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| Posted 7/17/11 10:09 PM |
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hotsauce345
my love, my life, my son
Member since 1/09 4169 total posts
Name:
Melody
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by MrsMeloyellow
probably not until he's 15...I know alot of people who give their children keys and have them come home on their own...but god forbiid something happened...we are legally responsible for them. legally they need supervision...and i really believe there is a damn good reason why as we can see from the news lately
ETA: we had a girl living in our home with a 9 yo...she gave her 9 yo keys and had her walk about 4 blocks from school to an empty home. as soon as i found out she did it i had to sit her down...because this house is in our name...and if anything ever happened say...she accidentally started a fire or house was broken into. that could pose all sorts of liabilities for us as homeowners. her answer to me was "oh i'm not worried about it...she's really responsible!" well at 9yo i was one of the most responsible, mature kids you'd ever meet bc i was always hanging out with the adults, carrying on adult conversations, cleaning, doing my own laundry etc....well at 9yo i accidentally burned my house down. accidents happen...and there are alot of crazies out there...kids need supervision these days...its not like it was back in the day.
Accidents do happen but 15 seems kind of old to start having your children stay at home alone by themselves. IME 10,11 is the starting age. I don't mean all day, everyday but a few hours here and there. Sometimes it is not possible to be home when they get home for school or other things. Personally I LOVE that I don't have to take my older child every place I go.
but if something happened and an officer came to your home while you were gone...is it worth risking having your child taken away? it sucks, but if i can't stay home with him, i'll have to figure out a way to get childcare or have a relative get my son or make other arrangements.
I myself...was allowed to walk home from school at a young age bc my mom worked full time. both me and my older sister made flamethrowers out of hairspray and candles...& as a teenager forget it!...I experimented with drugs, had friends over when mom wasn't home, drank...not that i think it was her fault but obviously not having supervision made it alot easier. and my mom was STRICT. if school was out at a certain time i had 10-15 minuted to get home...and i had to call her...from the house phone as soon as i got in. but 15 minutes was enough time to smoke pot with friends on the way home...and once i made that call...coast was clear until she got home.
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| Posted 7/17/11 10:46 PM |
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hotsauce345
my love, my life, my son
Member since 1/09 4169 total posts
Name:
Melody
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Re: What age will you allow your DC to walk home from school/camp./wherever alone?
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Goldi0218
Right. You can teach a child how to walk from point A to point B but emergencies and crises happen in between those two points that mommy and daddy may or may not have taught their children and no matter how "responsible" a child may be, they are still a child and do not know how to respond appropriate to all crises. Shoot I am going to be 41 in a couple of weeks and i get panic attacks every now and again. What happens if a young child does?
That is why you don't leave your child until you are 100% certain they will be ok and I am not sure how long people are speaking about and how far you would be from home.
my point is you NEVER know when they are 100% and even when you THINK you do...a child can surprise you...after all...they're only children
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| Posted 7/17/11 10:48 PM |
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