WWYD? Daycare and religion

I had a really upsetting conversation with DD's daycare teacher today. DD goes to a christian daycare center. I'm not a religious person, but they treat DD really well and she likes going there. Today her teacher and I were talking and she brought up how being gay or lesbian is a sin and that we should pray for all of the gays to find Jesus and to stop sinning. I was really uncomfortable with the conversation because I completely disagree with her, but I was so stunned that she said that. I kind of just sat there with my mouth open and didn't respond. DD is only 8 1/2 mo so I know she doesn't really understand what is going on. She's also moving out of that room in daycare in 2 weeks so I'm not even sure if it's worth getting upset about. I just don't want someone teaching my child that being gay is somehow wrong or dirty. I want her to grow up treating everyone equally and I want her to know that it's okay to be gay if that's how she feels when she gets older.

What you would have done in that situation?

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I would be uncomfortable if someone who was caring for my child intending on one day expressing those views to my child, however in this situation I don't think I would have said something, after all it is a christian school, where teachers and staff may believe this. If you are uncomfortable with these views and maybe other points of views the teachers may have or point of views that me be taught to your dd maybe you should consider finding another place for your child as she gets older.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Even though your DC won't understand, I couldn't do it....I'd have to find a new center. I can't subscribe to that kind of mentality in any form.

this is why I am having trouble finding a reasonable preschool that doesn't have religious-ties.

Message edited 3/23/2011 9:44:47 PM.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

This is still bothering me today. Does anyone else have any advice?

The hard thing is that our second favorite place for daycare would cost $350 more per month and that's really not in the budget right now.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Posted by LadyBugN2Buggies

Even though your DC won't understand, I couldn't do it....I'd have to find a new center. I can't subscribe to that kind of mentality in any form.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

is it possible to express to the teachers that you'd like to teach them these things? otherwise i agree with the others and i would find another place.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

While it's not a sentiment I agree with, I'd imagine most Christian daycares are going to feel this way.

I'd try to find another affordable place.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I would discuss IMMEDIATELY & then decide if I wanted to pull my child out. I understand the bible states so but it's my child and I get to decide what she hears, what she believes. Furthermore, this should not be discussed at a daycare aged level. . .ever.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Is it just this teacher?

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

If you're sending your child to a religious school, they're going to teach their beliefs.

You can switch daycares or take this as an opportunity to educate your child that everyone has a different opinion & we - our family - do not believe it is a sin.

I believe that if there is a God, he believes as long as you love instead of hate, it makes no difference who you love.

I've also taught my kids that while our state law is that boys can't marry boys & girls can't marry girls, I disagree with the law & will vote for people that agree with me to change the law.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Hrmm... I'm not religious either but that' sorta rubs me wrong.

Still that young I'd probably not care. I mean she's not teaching my child anything at that age other than maybe how to walk.

But I'd be interested in the next teacher.

I don't what your personal opinions are, your religious beliefs, etc. Just don't want you telling my child gays are bad. Let her make that decision herself. Its not your role to teach my child morals, its mine.

If you want to pray ... pray god sets me straight and helps me to teach her well, because I'm pretty sure I already am!



ETA: oh its a christian school type place. Still its rather much to be preaching to them that young in my opinion.

Message edited 3/24/2011 1:21:13 PM.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I just don't see this being a school topic to be discussed, even in catholic school. . .no?

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I would not be comfortable with it. However-you still have a good year before your child will parrot words and then another year before they truly understand concepts like that(at least.) I wouldn't worry about it too much now. I have a very religious nanny who comes to my home but she does not talk about religion to my kids at all. I would be annoyed if she did

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

well I look at it like this...I am catholic and so is my son. they teach the same thing basically. we will bring him up in the church, but we will teach him that sometimes the church is wrong in their interpretation, and that God loves everyone and it's totally natural for some men to love other men and some women to love other women.

I wouldn't get to crazy about it.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

My daughter is at a jewish preschool, and DH and I are not religious, we're atheist. They teach her everything about religion, and she's starting to ask some really difficult questions of us. I've had to have frank conversations with her in which I explain that Mommy and Daddy don't believe in God and that it's ok for everyone to believe something different. I imagine it's a little difficult for her because she's getting conflicting information from school and home, but thankfully her school seems to be a very open and accepting environment (there are a lot of gay parents, people of other religions, etc), so while they teach the religion, they are open to the children asking pointed and thoughtful questions.

I guess my point is, if they are at a religious school, obviously they have a religious agenda, and there's not much you can do about it. If you aren't comfortable with the method that they communicate their ideals, you can do one of two things - spend a lot of time with your child, when it is age-appropriate, discussing your own beliefs to offset what they are learning at school, or, the other alternative is to find a school that more closely aligns with your philosophies

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

You had to know the church's stance on these types of issues before you sent your child there, so I'm not sure why you were so surprised at their beliefs. Obviously not an appropriate venue for such a discussion, but not a skocker that they feel that way.

I wouldn't expect a secular daycare to be sending that message, but yours IS a church daycare- to expect them to conform to your beliefs if they go against the church's (whether they are right or wrong here) is unreasonable.

I'd send your child somewhere else if you are uncomfortable with it.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Posted by DPerotti

I just don't see this being a school topic to be discussed, even in catholic school. . .no?

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

As long as you are planning on educating your child about religion, you can take a page from this:

Letter to Dr. Laura

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

eh, I highly doubt that they would teach the KIDS about gay/lesbian stuff at daycare. It was probably just something she brought up as an adult conversation (WHY she would is beyond me, but whatever). I wouldn't worry if I were you. Usually at Christian schools they do pray and teach the real meanings behind holidays (like Jesus' birth for Christmas, his resurrection for Easter, etc). But I really don't think they get into anything 'deep' like sinful lifestyles. That would be weird.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Posted by BriBri2u

Posted by LadyBugN2Buggies

Even though your DC won't understand, I couldn't do it....I'd have to find a new center. I can't subscribe to that kind of mentality in any form.

I agree...I wouldn't want my child around people who have this mentality.

I'd look for another place -

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

Posted by BriBri2u

Posted by LadyBugN2Buggies

Even though your DC won't understand, I couldn't do it....I'd have to find a new center. I can't subscribe to that kind of mentality in any form.

I agree...I wouldn't want my child around people who have this mentality.

I'd look for another place -

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I'd pull her out of that DC and send them a letter why. You can't debate someone with that kind mentality. You can only let them know it is unacceptable and move on.

Re: WWYD? Daycare and religion

I think I might have a really hard time with that. If it is a christian school and those are the views of all the teachers I'd consider finding somewhere else for Beth to go when it isn't going to impact her to switch at this point.

As she gets older her teachers are going to be a big part of her life. I would be wary of what she would learn that you don't agree with especially with topics as controversial as that. I don't think a daycare center is really a place to talk about subjects like that even to the parents.

Message edited 3/24/2011 1:40:17 PM.