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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by afternoondelight828
My point is that it seems that many more parents "deal" with the stresses of parenting now with drinks and meds.
Maybe some do, but not everyone. I have been drinking since long before anyone called me "mom" and will continue to do so, given any opportunity. Meds never have been nor ever will be my scene. I think your blanket statement is reflective of naivety. Not everyone has cocktails to "deal"; sometimes, it's just to enjoy. Try it some time. You won't regret it. 
Message edited 11/10/2015 7:28:04 AM.
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Posted 11/9/15 11:16 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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DaniJude
You're My Home <3
Member since 11/06 14815 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by afternoondelight828
My point is that it seems that many more parents "deal" with the stresses of parenting now with drinks and meds.
It's been like that for years
People were boozing it up and popping pills just as much 40 years ago as now- it just wasn't as publicized
My now 93 year old grandmother used to call them her "nerve pills" ... So funny bc we were just talking about this the other day. My father just shakes his head!
LMFAO 
Message edited 11/10/2015 7:24:53 AM.
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:24 AM |
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by FirstMate
Posted by afternoondelight828
My point is that it seems that many more parents "deal" with the stresses of parenting now with drinks and meds.
Maybe some do, but not everyone. I have been drinking since long before anyone called me "mom" and will continue to do so, given any opportunity. Meds never have been nor ever will be my scene. I think your blanket statement is reflective of naivety. Not everyone has cocktails to "deal"; sometimes, it's just to enjoy. Try it some time. You won't regret it.
If you read my posts, you would see I DO drink, I just never found the need when my kids were younger and never found the need to when they were toting.
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:29 AM |
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I find it more now with the paint and sip parties, the drinking with toting, the constant, I need a glass of wine at every function I go to.
I grew up on LI and don't remember as much drinking (and popping a xanax) as it is now. Moms had coffee clutches, not play dates with bottles of wine.
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:32 AM |
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RocPin
Life's Beachy <3
Member since 2/08 6765 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by Hopefulmama
I don't think alcohol is an illicit substance. Honestly when I see what some people eat in front of their children, or with their children, it may inwardly raise my eyebrows but I am far enough into the mom game that I try to never judge another family. Personally, I have a child with special needs, and one drink takes the edge off of social gatherings which can be incredibly difficult for my special guy. If someone wants to judge me for responsibly consuming a legal substance that actually has demonstrated health benefits, they can go ahead. I have better things to do. Like drinking!
Eta- I'm not referring specifically to OP, but I think a lot of this is just the typical judgment that kicks in whenever we see a mom doing something a mom isn't "supposed" to do - drinking, working, having fun, wearing a bikini, leaving her kids with a sitter while she goes to the gym, gets a mani. Etc. there seems to be this persistent idea that being a mom is all self sacrifice.
We always drink when alcohol is provided. We always provide alcohol at parties. As long as its responsibly, there is no reason to judge. To each their own.
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| Posted 11/10/15 8:35 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by afternoondelight828
I find it more now with the paint and sip parties, the drinking with toting, the constant, I need a glass of wine at every function I go to.
I grew up on LI and don't remember as much drinking (and popping a xanax) as it is now. Moms had coffee clutches, not play dates with bottles of wine.
People have been drinking since the dawn of time. Not just parents. Not just nowadays. I would bet you anything it's no different now than it was 40 yrs ago.
And honestly, what does it even matter?? If people are drinking responsibly, who cares if they have a glass of wine with friends instead of a cup of coffee?
I haven't been to a single holiday or party (outside of kid places) that don't have a ton of alcohol, adults like to drink. Just a fact of life. It's really nothing new.
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| Posted 11/10/15 8:41 AM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by FirstMate
Posted by afternoondelight828
My point is that it seems that many more parents "deal" with the stresses of parenting now with drinks and meds.
Maybe some do, but not everyone. I have been drinking since long before anyone called me "mom" and will continue to do so, given any opportunity. Meds never have been nor ever will be my scene. I think your blanket statement is reflective of naivety. Not everyone has cocktails to "deal"; sometimes, it's just to enjoy. Try it some time. You won't regret it.
Yeah I was going to say- I was boozing it up even MORE before i had DD. I was out constantly with work, happy hours, gatherings in the city.
It slowed down a TON since becoming a mom because I can't be going out all the time like i used to.
But I always loved my wine. And beer. And margaritas.
And it wasn't to deal with any stress. It was because I enjoyed it
Period.
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| Posted 11/10/15 8:42 AM |
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RocPin
Life's Beachy <3
Member since 2/08 6765 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by LotsaLuv
Im currently pregnant and every time my husband grabs a beer or makes a drink I give him pitiful eyes and say "Life is only half as fun and interesting without booze."
We also grew up in drinking families where the adults always were always drinking at parties. Good times!
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| Posted 11/10/15 8:46 AM |
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MrsDrMatt
Live and RUN like a Ninja!
Member since 5/06 3104 total posts
Name:
MrsDrMatt
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Yes I have a drink at kid events. I try to not shoot heroin or do a line of cocaine until I get home though. I have to draw the line somewhere.
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| Posted 11/10/15 9:08 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by MrsDrMatt
Yes I have a drink at kid events. I try to not shoot heroin or do a line of cocaine until I get home though. I have to draw the line somewhere.
It's good you have your limits!!! 
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| Posted 11/10/15 9:21 AM |
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Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I'll be honest. I totally judged a mom recently for TWO seconds and then realized I was being a Jealous Jenny.
She had a drink (no one else did) and looked like she was having fun. It was a kid-based community event. I totally thought "wow. You have to drink?" As I clutched my pearls (figuratively).
Then I realized something. I was envious.
She was indulging in a nice drink and having fun and there I was, stuck with two kids and I was alone, and I just don't feel comfy drinking even one glass of wine and driving. Especially since I so rarely drink these days - if I have even one, I'm tipsy. And forget it if
I haven't eaten a big meal. So no way would I ever drink even one and get behind a wheel.
between work and kids and running around and juggling stuff by myself at the moment, it's just not on my radar. My social circle got small and bbqs stopped and then I guess there was just no opportunity to have a drink or two. And I wish there were
So I don't think there's a big deal at all about it. It's just another stigma, another way to judge other moms, to pit women against one another, etc.
It's not like dads come home and say "wow, Bill had two beers while we watched the game. And little Timmy saw! I just can't!!" Know what I mean?
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| Posted 11/10/15 9:53 AM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I honestly have never seen anyone do it in my neighborhood nor would I personally drink while bringing my kids trick or treating. It just doesn't go together in my mind. So I see your point, OP.
I also don't really drink much, I will say that.
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| Posted 11/10/15 12:39 PM |
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jea128
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Member since 5/05 3415 total posts
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Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Unfortunately, this post goes back to the whole, "why do we constantly have to judge others?" (And Lord knows I've been guilty in the past). For instance, if a group of parents you're not with are drinking while TOT'ing, and they're not affecting you (they're no beligerent, their children are being supervised, etc.), then why does it matter? If you don't feel you want to drink while TOT'ing, that's cool, but why do we always feel we have to judge others? KWIM?
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| Posted 11/10/15 1:29 PM |
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LotsaLuv
Us
Member since 6/10 4094 total posts
Name:
F
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Oh me too. My parents friends were always drinking. If they weren't drinking at a party or get together , actually, there never was a time they weren't lol It's just how it was. They are not drunks, they just like to have alcohol, and so do we.
I was jealous of everyone drinking this Halloween, we had a party, my DH was that guy with the wagon, wheeling around the cooler for everyone else, and I was drinking water. Last year I did have my solo cup though haha. My neighborhood had others with solo cups too. I guess we live in a party town.
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| Posted 11/10/15 1:35 PM |
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by jea128
Unfortunately, this post goes back to the whole, "why do we constantly have to judge others?" (And Lord knows I've been guilty in the past). For instance, if a group of parents you're not with are drinking while TOT'ing, and they're not affecting you (they're no beligerent, their children are being supervised, etc.), then why does it matter? If you don't feel you want to drink while TOT'ing, that's cool, but why do we always feel we have to judge others? KWIM?
I never judged anyone for drinking with kids. My point, and I think the original poster's was, how did things like toting and kids parties turn into parents wanting and needing drinks for an hour or two?
I drink with the best of them but when my kids were younger, my entire focus was on them when they were doing "kid's" things. Maybe others drank at these places but I have been a mother for almost 18 years and IME, no one was ever drinking in this type of situations and I have been to so many different kids things with all different types of people.
Hopefully parents who do drink when their kids are younger do it responsibly and do not drink (or drug) and drive as there are just way too many people that do and destroy their life and the lives of others.
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| Posted 11/10/15 1:57 PM |
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blue11
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 1706 total posts
Name:
kat
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Do you drink at kid events/parties?
i see nothing wrong with it, i didn't have any drinks while TOTing but wouldn't judge anyone who did. i think especially since it was on a saturday a lot of people had parties / get togethers. I don't think its that parents NEED to have a drink or aren't enjoying or focusing on their kids events. If i had one glass of wine it would be no different than me drinking water while walking around - one glass doesn't do much!
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| Posted 11/10/15 2:38 PM |
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JSDB
<3
Member since 1/13 1329 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I didnt read all of the responses but:
1. Yes I drink in front of my kids, a glass of wine or a beer at dinner, at a party, etc.
2. No I never drink and drive. I dont feel comfortable getting behind the wheel if I have had anything to drink. Maybe one small drink over the course of 3+ hours but even then I am reluctant to do it. I either let other people drive or I dont drink.
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| Posted 11/10/15 3:38 PM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name:
fka LIW Smara
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by afternoondelight828
I never judged anyone for drinking with kids. My point, and I think the original poster's was, how did things like toting and kids parties turn into parents wanting and needing drinks for an hour or two?
In all honesty alcohol at a kids party is not a recent thing to me nor is drinking while Trick or Treating. So it never changed it was always this way in my group of family and friends. I actually feel like kid parties were more fun and casual when I was kid.
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:17 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I'm drinking the shitt out of a strong Cosmo right now. .in front of my daughter.
I started it while helping her with her homework. 
I had a bad day at work.
This thread immediately came to mind!
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:32 PM |
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muffaboo
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 3797 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
My husband and I always drink (responsibly) when at kid's events. Our daughter is only 1 but we absolutely had plenty of alcohol at her bday party
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:39 PM |
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Naturalmama
Love my boys!!
Member since 1/12 3548 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by NervousNell
I'm drinking the shitt out of a strong Cosmo right now. .in front of my daughter.
I started it while helping her with her homework.
I had a bad day at work.
This thread immediately came to mind!
I come from a huge Italian family, my born in Italy grandparents were giving the grandkids wine with Sunday dinner when we were still in elementary school. We only got a 1/4 of a glass but it is what they did in Italy.  All 14 grandkids turned out just fine.
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| Posted 11/10/15 7:40 PM |
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allIwant
Love my crazy life!
Member since 1/10 9170 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
yes...we are always responsible. If I am driving I only have one drink.
We have been known to walk home from our close friends that live in our neighborhood pushing the triple stroller
I don't think times are any different now....my parent's friends still talk about how my christening was the BEST party they have ever been to.
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| Posted 11/10/15 8:17 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
I think people are just more open about it now. I think in the past it was a little more taboo but it definitely happened. My brother played hockey and I remember all of the parents drinking at his hockey games. Thermoses full of booze. Not my own parents, because they didn't drink much, but most of the others.
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| Posted 11/11/15 2:50 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by afternoondelight828
I never judged anyone for drinking with kids. My point, and I think the original poster's was, how did things like toting and kids parties turn into parents wanting and needing drinks for an hour or two?
I drink with the best of them but when my kids were younger, my entire focus was on them when they were doing "kid's" things. Maybe others drank at these places but I have been a mother for almost 18 years and IME, no one was ever drinking in this type of situations and I have been to so many different kids things with all different types of people.
Hopefully parents who do drink when their kids are younger do it responsibly and do not drink (or drug) and drive as there are just way too many people that do and destroy their life and the lives of others.
I think you come off as judging because you say things like "my entire focus was my kids." It makes it seem like because someone is enjoying a glass of wine, their entire focus is not their kids and therefore not being as good a parent as you are. I always bring a diet coke to Pump it Up parties. Because I am having a beverage does that mean I am not focusing on my kids? Having A glass of wine or A drink does not mean you are not focusing on your child.
And also there is a big difference between NEEDING and WANTING. I think most people would agree that they don't NEED a drink to survive a children's party, but why not have one if it's available? I think 99% of the people who say they NEED a drink are just joking around and they aren't full alcoholics who actually need the drink to survive.
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| Posted 11/11/15 2:56 PM |
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Re: Do you drink at kid events/parties?
Posted by lululu
Posted by afternoondelight828
I never judged anyone for drinking with kids. My point, and I think the original poster's was, how did things like toting and kids parties turn into parents wanting and needing drinks for an hour or two?
I drink with the best of them but when my kids were younger, my entire focus was on them when they were doing "kid's" things. Maybe others drank at these places but I have been a mother for almost 18 years and IME, no one was ever drinking in this type of situations and I have been to so many different kids things with all different types of people.
Hopefully parents who do drink when their kids are younger do it responsibly and do not drink (or drug) and drive as there are just way too many people that do and destroy their life and the lives of others.
I think you come off as judging because you say things like "my entire focus was my kids." It makes it seem like because someone is enjoying a glass of wine, their entire focus is not their kids and therefore not being as good a parent as you are. I always bring a diet coke to Pump it Up parties. Because I am having a beverage does that mean I am not focusing on my kids? Having A glass of wine or A drink does not mean you are not focusing on your child.
And also there is a big difference between NEEDING and WANTING. I think most people would agree that they don't NEED a drink to survive a children's party, but why not have one if it's available? I think 99% of the people who say they NEED a drink are just joking around and they aren't full alcoholics who actually need the drink to survive.
A diet coke and an alcoholic beverage is quite different, IMO. I am not going to get buzzed/drunk on coke and get a DUI or DWI for drinking a coke.
The "focusing" on my child simply means that there is nothing else but me and my child to go Toting. To me drinking at certain places is just a distraction to what the whole intention of the thing is you are doing.
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| Posted 11/11/15 3:17 PM |
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