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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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How did you feel about?
I could really use some advice or thoughts from those who have been there.
Message edited 9/6/2008 6:01:59 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:27 AM |
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Long Island Weddings
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InShock
life is good
Member since 10/06 9258 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Personally, I loved having visitors. It was a long stay and I enjoyed the company. No one over-stayed their welcome - and if I ever needed some privacy (e.g. to nurse or go to the bathroom), they left w/o hesitation - sometimes just waiting outside the door or getting something to eat and then returning. I think MOST people know that hospital visits are meant to be short and sweet.
Good luck!
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Posted 7/11/08 9:30 AM |
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SweetCin
My green-eyed boy
Member since 5/05 13499 total posts
Name: Cin
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I had an unscheduled cs & had visitors all day. Personally I thought I'd want quiet/or DH time, but it was fine. I was feeling good though & made sure I got up first thing the next morning...my first visitors were my parents & his & so I could be me. Then as the day went on it was my bro/SIL, cousins & aunts/uncles. The first day it didn't get to me, but the 2nd day I was feeling bad gas pains & at one point let DH take visitors to the NICU while I rested, saying I wasn't up to it.
Like the OP said, I think if you said you need to rest or such, people would get the hint. Everyone just wants to share in the joyous occasion.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:33 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by InShock
and if I ever needed some privacy (e.g. to nurse or go to the bathroom), they left w/o hesitation - sometimes just waiting outside the door or getting something to eat and then returning. I think MOST people know that hospital visits are meant to be short and sweet.
Good luck!
Thanks for sharing your perspective. Somehow I don't imagine some people I refer to having that much of a clue. I hope I am wrong.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:34 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name: me
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I had DS on a Friday afternoon. I wanted no visitors until Sunday and I am glad I did that. I was in no shape to see anyone the day after.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:36 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by SweetCin
Like the OP said, I think if you said you need to rest or such, people would get the hint.
I guess in my case, I have people who would have to travel over 1.5 hrs and they can't just "pop" by. So that is partly where my concern comes from. Also, I forgot to ask, did you have visitors the first day after the surgery? Thanks so much!
Message edited 7/11/2008 9:41:58 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:37 AM |
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lulugrrl
My 3 Blessings
Member since 3/06 6551 total posts
Name: L
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
My case was a little different. It was an emergency, and my DS was not in the same hospital. I was really not up to certain visitors. The nurses were wonderful, and on top of it. I'd tell them I'd accept a visitor for 5 minutes, and they would come in, make an excuse and kick them out.
See how you feel, it may be just fine, but the nurses will help keep people at bay if you ask.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:38 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by smdl
I had DS on a Friday afternoon. I wanted no visitors until Sunday and I am glad I did that. I was in no shape to see anyone the day after.
Did you specifically tell family members no visitors until Sunday? Can I ask how they took that?
To me, I can't see having visitors first day, maybe even my own parents. I love my mom but she doesn't exactly lower my stress level. But as I said, maybe I will surprise myself?
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Posted 7/11/08 9:39 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by lulugrrl
I was really not up to certain visitors. The nurses were wonderful, and on top of it. I'd tell them I'd accept a visitor for 5 minutes, and they would come in, make an excuse and kick them out.
See how you feel, it may be just fine, but the nurses will help keep people at bay if you ask.
Thank you... I was hoping the nurses would get in on it...this way I don't seem rude it coming from me, as opposed to "drs" orders.
Message edited 7/11/2008 9:41:24 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:40 AM |
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Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
This is definitely something to discuss with your DH ahead of time, because he will be the one setting the tone for visitors most likely.
I had surgery before I had my c-sections and a c-section is just so different. You have this new life and you are so excited, plus you have to take care of this new life so you really don't get that after surgery rest. Plus in my experience those nurses have you up and on your feet really quickly. They know you are going home with a newborn so they want you to recover pretty quickly.
They regular visiting hours aren't that long so you would most likely have to worry about the grandparents who do (at most hospitals I would think) have much longer visiting hours. It will most likely be a see how you feel type of thing too. You may feel great (the pain killers work quite nicely)
I would try not to worry and I think if you are truly feeling poorly you will have no problem saying okay time to leave I need my rest.
ETA: I think you should let everyone know beforehand that if it is a c-section that they should wait until day 2 or even 3. You will be in the hospital for a few days.
Message edited 7/11/2008 9:45:07 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:42 AM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name: Me
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
The day of my c-section I did not want to know anyone other than DS & my DH. I was exhausted to be honest, and really just wanted me & DH to bond with DS.
The next day I did not care so much.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:44 AM |
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patti08
Happy
Member since 5/05 3893 total posts
Name: Patti
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I had a c-section after 24 hours of labor. I was exhausted.
The second night in the hospital I spiked a fever and was woken up so many times, checking vitals, remove the bandage, feed the baby, vitals, meds, remove the catheter, vitals, meds, feed the baby. I was exhausted and could still barely get out of bed. That, combined with the fever I told DH to limit visitors to immediate family only and tell them they only had 30 minutes. We said we'd rather have the visitors (and the help) once we were at home. Everyone understood.
When I have the next one (most likely a planned c-section) I'll probably have the same policy. The hospital stay is the time and place for me to rest and recover. The baby is also very sleepy/dopey in the first few days. I'd prefer that people save their visits for at home.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:46 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by MsMBV
The day of my c-section I did not want to know anyone other than DS & my DH. I was exhausted to be honest, and really just wanted me & DH to bond with DS.
The next day I did not care so much.
Even your immediate family (mom, etc)?This was my original plan but unfortunately I need my parents to watch my dogs so they have to be in on it.
What bugs me most is my dad is one of those guys who tries to "sneak" extra people into the room at a hospital by playing games with passes, etc, or pull some strings with security. I don't believe they are very strict where I will be delivering, from what I have read. So I already anticpate this and worry that I will have a room full of people who never leave. Ugh. I know he needs to be put in line beforehand but that's so stressful to have to say to my dad, a new grandfather! Yet I know I have to put myself first. That's why it's already stressing me out.
Message edited 7/11/2008 9:50:32 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:49 AM |
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Jenhos
Maeve
Member since 6/05 3273 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I have had 2 c-sections and loved having visitors. It is a long stay. My first one was born at 5:20 pm and I had vistors the next morning. My second was born at 8:20 pm and my brother actually came and sat in the recovery room with me while Matt went to the nursery with the baby. And then everyone else came to visit the next day. If the doctor came to check me or I needed to use the bathroom my visitors waited outside.
I had a roomate with my first and I thought that was more annoying. Second time I had a single room and it was better.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:52 AM |
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krashnburn
I am Batman!
Member since 5/05 4093 total posts
Name: I'm Batman, I tell you!
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I was not looking forward to having people and I asked DH to help make anyone who showed up leave quickly. But it was actually OK and I didn't really mind. There were times I think I could have used the rest instead of entertaining, but it wasn't as bad as I though it'd be.
What I didn't like, and no one even asked me if I wanted visitors, was immediately after my cs when I was in recovery waitign to get feeling back in my legs with that big inflatable blanket over, they let everyone in to see me! I was ticked! I just wanted to pass out and I had 5 people hovering over me asking me about everything. They were only there like 15min, but I really wish they had just waited till the next day considering it was 2am and they even had to go to work the next day.
ETA Having a roommate was waaayyyy worse than having visitors. I got lucky and was by myself the first 3 days. The 4th day I got this woman who had like 20 people in the room (she had 6 kids and family who worked int he hospital) and she snored like a jackhammer!!! I asked to leave early.
Message edited 7/11/2008 10:01:35 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:52 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by patti08
I had a c-section after 24 hours of labor. I was exhausted.
The second night in the hospital I spiked a fever and was woken up so many times, checking vitals, remove the bandage, feed the baby, vitals, meds, remove the catheter, vitals, meds, feed the baby. I was exhausted and could still barely get out of bed. That, combined with the fever I told DH to limit visitors to immediate family only and tell them they only had 30 minutes. We said we'd rather have the visitors (and the help) once we were at home. Everyone understood.
Yes, I guess DH will have to make my wishes clear ..I like your plan. I may just use it. Thank you!
Thank you all. This thread has been very helpful in easing my stress. I thought I was insane for feeling this way!!!! You ladies are the best!!!! I would feel so alone without your support and stories! Keep em coming.
Message edited 7/11/2008 10:10:01 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:52 AM |
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Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
All you have to do is let the nurses know and they will kick them out for you.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:52 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by krashnburn
What I didn't like, and no one even asked me if I wanted visitors, was immediately after my cs when I was in recovery waitign to get feeling back in my legs with that big inflatable blanket over, they let everyone in to see me! I was ticked! I just wanted to pass out and I had 5 people hovering over me asking me about everything. They were only there like 15min, but I really wish they had just waited till the next day considering it was 2am and they even had to go to work the next day.
That would upset me too! That's just not right IMO. That sounds very invasive to me! I'm so sorry they let everyone barge in on you like that.
I already told DH, NO ONE is to be there when I have the surgery. Even my parents. Only DH. I really don't want anyone there but DH until I say it's ok for people to start coming. I am very private and feel very vulnerable in a situation like that, and I am not the sharing type. I prefer to deal alone only with my DH.
Message edited 7/11/2008 9:57:21 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:56 AM |
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DanaRenee
Fitness Junkie!
Member since 6/06 6470 total posts
Name: Dana
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
I had a vaginal birth and I hated visitors
I just wanted privacy. My baby was even in NICU, not even in my room, and I still didn't want anyone around!! I had to pump too, so that was a royal PITA...try pumping when a visitor could walk thru at any moment
Maybe your DH could tell friends and family to all come at 1 time, one day, and that is it? I would think people would understand, especially those that had babies already
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Posted 7/11/08 9:57 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section?
Posted by DanaRenee
I had a vaginal birth and I hated visitors
I just wanted privacy. My baby was even in NICU, not even in my room, and I still didn't want anyone around!! I had to pump too, so that was a royal PITA...try pumping when a visitor could walk thru at any moment
Maybe your DH could tell friends and family to all come at 1 time, one day, and that is it? I would think people would understand, especially those that had babies already
I was going to add vaginal but since the stay is much shorter, I didn't, yet I was hoping those who had a vaginal would post anyone. So I am glad you posted! Maybe I will change my title!
ETA - Done. Title changed!
Message edited 7/11/2008 10:01:07 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 9:58 AM |
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johnsae
Sip.
Member since 3/06 18677 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section/or vag delivery?
This was actually a sore subject between me and DH's family. I had an unexpected C-section and was having issues with BF'ing and my IL's wanted every friggin person they knew (and I barely knew) to visit me in the hospital. I wanted only close friends and family.
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Posted 7/11/08 10:02 AM |
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DanaRenee
Fitness Junkie!
Member since 6/06 6470 total posts
Name: Dana
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section/or vag delivery?
Posted by Goobster
Posted by DanaRenee
I had a vaginal birth and I hated visitors
I just wanted privacy. My baby was even in NICU, not even in my room, and I still didn't want anyone around!! I had to pump too, so that was a royal PITA...try pumping when a visitor could walk thru at any moment
Maybe your DH could tell friends and family to all come at 1 time, one day, and that is it? I would think people would understand, especially those that had babies already
I was going to add vaginal but since the stay is much shorter, I didn't, yet I was hoping those who had a vaginal would post anyone. So I am glad you posted! Maybe I will change my title!
HaHaHa I just re-read my post and it sounded so harsh ! I guess at some moments a visitor was nice, but my family knows the staff of the hospital really well so they were coming and going as they pleased, outside of normal visiting hrs. It was sooo annoying. Like I said, if you want more privacy, I'd try to consolidate everyones visit...and have DH stress that you want to rest...alone!
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Posted 7/11/08 10:03 AM |
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Eireann
Two ladies and a gentleman!
Member since 5/05 12165 total posts
Name:
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section/or vag delivery?
I had two c-sections, one unplanned and one scheduled. I found recovery to be quite difficult, but I loved having visitors and was a bit bummed that less people showed up the 2nd time. Grandparents had to watch DD, I was there a day less and I wasn't in over the weekend with #2.
Message edited 7/11/2008 10:05:10 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 10:04 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section/or vag delivery?
Posted by DanaRenee
haHaHa I just re-read my post and it sounded so harsh ! I guess at some moments a visitor was nice, but my family knows the staff of the hospital really well so they were coming and going as they pleased, outside of normal visiting hrs. It was sooo annoying. Like I said, if you want more privacy, I'd try to consolidate everyones visit...and have DH stress that you want to rest...alone!
Please don't think it sounded harsh. I think you/we have every right! That must have been so annoying re your family coming and going. My dad is like that. Knows a lot of security guards and always tries to get multiple passes, etc, which means no one has to leave. That's my main concern! Setting limits. So I do understand.
I think everyone forgets that a woman just went through so much trauma after having a baby, just b/c a new baby enters the picture. I guess that's my fear, that I will be the real patient, but everyone will forget about me and what I need. Hopefully I am wrong.
Message edited 7/11/2008 10:06:35 AM.
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Posted 7/11/08 10:06 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: How did you feel about having frequent/long visitors while in the hospital after having a c-section/or vag delivery?
Posted by johnsae
This was actually a sore subject between me and DH's family. I had an unexpected C-section and was having issues with BF'ing and my IL's wanted every friggin person they knew (and I barely knew) to visit me in the hospital. I wanted only close friends and family.
I hope it worked out for you.
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Posted 7/11/08 10:07 AM |
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