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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Summerrluvv
Didn't they create a cap on welfare a while back? A person can't be on welfare for more than 5 years during their entire lifetime or something like that? So I don't know that people live off the system their ENTIRE lives anymore.
I don't think that went thru---because I've known people who are continuing to remain on welfare for years and years still today.
who? I mean not names, but I have not heard of this. I knwo people in SUCH need. Nothing at all and cannot get a dime.
I think too many people still believe in the cliques and dont realize times have changed and the average person does not abuse the system. That its HARD to abuse the system .
And like a few have sdaid, why has this thread turned into this?
It should be about how sad that couple was and how we all should help each other and how judgements do NO ONE any good.
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Posted 8/18/08 4:40 PM  |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by stickydust
Who decides how much $$ a family should have in order to have children. For example, my DH and I do pretty well so for us it may mean that you should not have children if you cannot feed them, afford to send them to private school, and private universities...that is ridiculous and I do not think I am anyone to tell someone under what financial situations they should have children.
Flame me if you will--sorry if this offends....but if you can not provide for YOURSELF the basic necessities to get by in life....a job...a roof over your head....without asking the government to help you...then nope...i don't think you should have a child. guess what? that child will enter the system young and the cycle continues over and over and over again. THAT is the reason the system is flawed because people continue to raise GENERATIONS under welfare and food stamps. why should they bother with a job? the govt gives out FREE MONEY! That is the problem with so many people who use the system.
And not ALL of the people using public assistance fall into this category, but many do. Heck my sister used food stamps at one point in her life--she need some help. She used it---got off of it and is very successful and independent. Yet my ILs are examples of people who just don't think they need to hold a job. They just kept having kid after kid after kid....using money for drugs and barely even teaching their kids anything beyond how to swipe their "Benefit" card.
So yeah, I'll admit it--i think there are people who should NOT be allowed to have children.
ETA: and i think there is a difference between falling on hard times and needing help AFTER the fact--like having a baby and such and people lose jobs. and those that are born into the system, and never bother to leave it and continue to wait for the 1st of the month for their govt check and then pop out more kids.
Would you then suggest these people have abortions?
Like I have shown, Im an example of an accident can happen and yet its also a miracle to me and while we will struggle, we will make it work SOMEHOW.
Would you suggest we all get abortions if we cannot afford the "accidents"...happy or not?
Or not even give us a chance to work out our problems , whether that involvess government assistance or not?
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| Posted 8/18/08 4:42 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by dm24angel
who? I mean not names, but I have not heard of this. I knwo people in SUCH need. Nothing at all and cannot get a dime.
I think too many people still believe in the cliques and dont realize times have changed and the average person does not abuse the system. That its HARD to abuse the system .
And like a few have sdaid, why has this thread turned into this?
It should be about how sad that couple was and how we all should help each other and how judgements do NO ONE any good.
trust me when i say that i can think of 5 people i know personally who abuse the system. especially where foot stamps are concerned. it makes me so angry cause i know there are people out there who NEED it and seriously are trying to make ends meet. yet i know of one person in particular who continues to get HUNDREDS of $$$$ in WIC support even though she doesn't need it. she lies and finagles the system like crazy....and laughs about her Benefit card and how she goes and buys steak & shrimp at the supermarket with it.
and i'm not referring to the original couple on this-- i don't know their story. but the thread has digressed and i am just expressing my opinion based on what i've seen with my own 2 eyes.
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| Posted 8/18/08 4:51 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by dm24angel
Would you then suggest these people have abortions?
Like I have shown, Im an example of an accident can happen and yet its also a miracle to me and while we will struggle, we will make it work SOMEHOW.
Would you suggest we all get abortions if we cannot afford the "accidents"...happy or not?
Or not even give us a chance to work out our problems , whether that involvess government assistance or not?
I don't know what the solution is---can I not express my disgust at people who breed like rabbits but can't raise their own kids without receiving a govt assistance check for the entire time they raise said children? its a shame that they don't focus on birth control, and just have "mistakes" happen over and over again. i'm sorry but if you have a baby, and it was unexpected, that is one thing. but an 18 year old with like 3 kids already....isn't a simple "accident". its a horny girl who doesn't know how to either a)take a pill or b)tell her boyfriend to wear a condom.
are you honestly telling me that you don't get upset or annoyed hearing stories of or seeing young moms that are all on welfare and living off the system who keep having more babies??? your taxpaying money is going towards them and they are not paying a single DIME in taxes....because again, why should they? FREE MONEY!
so i guess a crackhead or a young teen mother who keeps having babies that they don't support and YOU and I pay for, we should just say "here's your check, I feel so sorry for you, but I'm happy about you bringing another moutht to feed into the world! What JOY!"
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| Posted 8/18/08 4:56 PM |
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Ali1
Mommy
Member since 8/05 3116 total posts
Name:
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
I didn't read through this whole thread, but take it from someone who has been there. My mother and father got a divorce when i was 4 years old and my mother worked as a nurse, but was barely getting by between paying our babysitter, food, house, etc and not to mention legal fees.
I didn't know it for years, but for months our babysitter (a wonderful older woman) was bringing food for us every day so we had food on our table and even didn't accept payment from my mom some weeks when times were tough. Today my mom does very well for herself, but when you go through something like that your always remember it.
Everyone can go through a tough time in life with $$$. I would care to think that these people are doing just that and not living off the system. Breaks my heart that there are families out there that cannot afford diapers.
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| Posted 8/18/08 5:05 PM |
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GioiaMia
Let's Go Rangers!
Member since 1/07 14818 total posts
Name:
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
I know this wasn't the original point of the thread BUT I just want to say as someone who WORKS with people who are on assistance, I have to agree with Melissa. I never knew such abuse existed but it is true.
I feel like 85% of the people who are on SSI ( basically federal welfare ) are abusing it. I have people call and say "If I have two more kids, how much money would I get for them" like it it their big life goal. And its all about ENTITLEMENT. Is it their fault? I don't know - the system sets them up to NEVER find work. Anything over $60 a MONTH has the potential to decrease their check so what is the point??
Anyway, I just wanted to add to this bc I see it every day and it disgusts me . . and sometimes I wish that I had REMAINED naive when it comes to these situations.
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| Posted 8/18/08 5:38 PM |
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Erica
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 11767 total posts
Name:
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Maybe the NY system is different, but I worked as a counselor for the California Welfare system and it was HARD to abuse. We had tons of courses on looking for abuse, etc.
The way i look at it, there are a few bad apples, but I would hate for those few to ruin it for people who really need it (i.e. MIL when FIL died and she had to raise 2 children on her own - that she didn't plan! She receive food stamps and SSI - neither of her children on on any welfare)
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| Posted 8/18/08 6:37 PM |
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evnme
My little lamb
Member since 8/05 12633 total posts
Name:
aka momma2b
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:07 PM |
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Kidsaplenty
Sister love
Member since 2/06 5971 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by dm24angel
Would you then suggest these people have abortions?
Like I have shown, Im an example of an accident can happen and yet its also a miracle to me and while we will struggle, we will make it work SOMEHOW.
Would you suggest we all get abortions if we cannot afford the "accidents"...happy or not?
Or not even give us a chance to work out our problems , whether that involvess government assistance or not?
I don't know what the solution is---can I not express my disgust at people who breed like rabbits but can't raise their own kids without receiving a govt assistance check for the entire time they raise said children? its a shame that they don't focus on birth control, and just have "mistakes" happen over and over again. i'm sorry but if you have a baby, and it was unexpected, that is one thing. but an 18 year old with like 3 kids already....isn't a simple "accident". its a horny girl who doesn't know how to either a)take a pill or b)tell her boyfriend to wear a condom.
are you honestly telling me that you don't get upset or annoyed hearing stories of or seeing young moms that are all on welfare and living off the system who keep having more babies??? your taxpaying money is going towards them and they are not paying a single DIME in taxes....because again, why should they? FREE MONEY!
so i guess a crackhead or a young teen mother who keeps having babies that they don't support and YOU and I pay for, we should just say "here's your check, I feel so sorry for you, but I'm happy about you bringing another moutht to feed into the world! What JOY!"
Wow
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:08 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Gertyrae
Wow...the turn of this thread saddens me.
How do you know these people are spending $$$ at a carnival or stealing gift cards or milking the system?
They were trying to use a gift card to buy items, not food stamps. And apparently they were on the phone with the person who gave them the card and were embarrassed when there was no $$ on it and ran out.
Sometimes people just fall on hard times. How do you know this wasn't a couple who had just lost their job or some other such thing? How many people on here have asked for help and received it? The economy right now sux...anything could be happening to them right now. I have friends who just had to do a short sell on their house cuz they were going to lose it. He's been a handyman/home improvement guy for 20 years and business just dropped off. They couldn't pay their mortgage and refinanced in the hopes that business would pick up again, which didn't happen. She went a got a job and he got a job, but they just couldn't make the payments. They aren't milking the system, but they fell on hard times. They aren't bad people and have always paid their bills with some $$$ in savings and it all kind of ran out on them.
I would have been with Kelly, instead of judging - I probably would have felt bad that I didn't jump in to help.
Because I have known quite a few people like that through the years (my dh's family and friends). It's hard NOT to judge when you are tainted with people like that in your life because you just do NOT know.
Unfortunately I think the worst now because of it and I try not to be naive either.
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:17 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by stickydust
Who decides how much $$ a family should have in order to have children. For example, my DH and I do pretty well so for us it may mean that you should not have children if you cannot feed them, afford to send them to private school, and private universities...that is ridiculous and I do not think I am anyone to tell someone under what financial situations they should have children.
Flame me if you will--sorry if this offends....but if you can not provide for YOURSELF the basic necessities to get by in life....a job...a roof over your head....without asking the government to help you...then nope...i don't think you should have a child. guess what? that child will enter the system young and the cycle continues over and over and over again. THAT is the reason the system is flawed because people continue to raise GENERATIONS under welfare and food stamps. why should they bother with a job? the govt gives out FREE MONEY! That is the problem with so many people who use the system.
And not ALL of the people using public assistance fall into this category, but many do. Heck my sister used food stamps at one point in her life--she need some help. She used it---got off of it and is very successful and independent. Yet my ILs are examples of people who just don't think they need to hold a job. They just kept having kid after kid after kid....using money for drugs and barely even teaching their kids anything beyond how to swipe their "Benefit" card.
So yeah, I'll admit it--i think there are people who should NOT be allowed to have children.
ETA: and i think there is a difference between falling on hard times and needing help AFTER the fact--like having a baby and such and people lose jobs. and those that are born into the system, and never bother to leave it and continue to wait for the 1st of the month for their govt check and then pop out more kids.
ITA with you. I have seen this first hand too with my dh's family and their friends.
I also totally understand falling on hard times and getting help BUT those are type of people who have pride and are embarassed to take anything and they work their hardest to find a job and get back into the system.
There are many people out there who just take the free ride and yes, generation after generation do it AND there are ALOT of scammers out there who know the system.
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:28 PM |
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MsG
Should be working
Member since 5/05 2824 total posts
Name:
G
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:50 PM |
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donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.
Member since 7/07 7650 total posts
Name:
K
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by KellyFG
but it concerns me that these people are having babies with no money to raise them
You were reading my mind, with both stories. Why are these people having children??
DH and I have held off on TTC b/c we want to be in a better financial position before we bring a child into this world.
I get very frustrated when I see things like that. IMO it's very irresponsible.
i don't think that is fair at all to say this. who is to say that they are being irresponsible? perhaps someone became ill and they have huge medical bills, perhaps they just got laid off from their job. we don't know their problems. having a child and you may not have a lot of money does not necessarily make you irresponsible.
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| Posted 8/18/08 7:55 PM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by donegal419
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by KellyFG
but it concerns me that these people are having babies with no money to raise them
You were reading my mind, with both stories. Why are these people having children??
DH and I have held off on TTC b/c we want to be in a better financial position before we bring a child into this world.
I get very frustrated when I see things like that. IMO it's very irresponsible.
i don't think that is fair at all to say this. who is to say that they are being irresponsible? perhaps someone became ill and they have huge medical bills, perhaps they just got laid off from their job. we don't know their problems. having a child and you may not have a lot of money does not necessarily make you irresponsible.
Look, I'm done commenting on this thread, I have my opinion and you nor anyone else is going to sway it.
I respect your opinion, however I disagree with it.
Please stop digging up comments I made pages and pages back from the other night as I will not reply from here on in.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:00 PM |
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donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.
Member since 7/07 7650 total posts
Name:
K
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by donegal419
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by KellyFG
but it concerns me that these people are having babies with no money to raise them
You were reading my mind, with both stories. Why are these people having children??
DH and I have held off on TTC b/c we want to be in a better financial position before we bring a child into this world.
I get very frustrated when I see things like that. IMO it's very irresponsible.
i don't think that is fair at all to say this. who is to say that they are being irresponsible? perhaps someone became ill and they have huge medical bills, perhaps they just got laid off from their job. we don't know their problems. having a child and you may not have a lot of money does not necessarily make you irresponsible.
Look, I'm done commenting on this thread, I have my opinion and you nor anyone else is going to sway it.
I respect your opinion, however I disagree with it.
Please stop digging up comments I made pages and pages back from the other night as I will not reply from here on in.
WOW! no need to get so NASTY! i haven't been on in a few days, just skimmed through thread and happened to make my comment. i didn't read the whole thread so i didn't realize that you had made other comments. no need to freak out on me. i just made my own comment. so much for having an opinion on a forum board. jeez!
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:03 PM |
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mrslobo2007
LIF Infant
Member since 12/06 209 total posts
Name:
Alison
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MsG
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
Thank you!!!!
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:06 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
I think I would have tried to help them. Who knows their situation? As a mom, I know my kid comes first. I would skip paying the phone bill if she needed food, diapers, whatever.
But, again, I don't know their situation and I would have tried to help, if I could. That would have definitely stayed with me, too.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:11 PM |
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HoneyBadger
YourWorstNightmare.
Member since 10/06 15979 total posts
Name:
BahBahBlackJeep
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by donegal419
Posted by Jennie0898
Look, I'm done commenting on this thread, I have my opinion and you nor anyone else is going to sway it.
I respect your opinion, however I disagree with it.
Please stop digging up comments I made pages and pages back from the other night as I will not reply from here on in.
WOW! no need to get so NASTY! i haven't been on in a few days, just skimmed through thread and happened to make my comment. i didn't read the whole thread so i didn't realize that you had made other comments. no need to freak out on me. i just made my own comment. so much for having an opinion on a forum board. jeez!
At no point did I freak out on you nor did I say you couldn't have your opinion. It's clear you didn't read what I said because I specifically stated that I RESPECT your opinion but I DISAGREE with it.
Please stop trying to have an arguement with me I'm not going to discuss this topic any further.
Thank you.
Message edited 8/18/2008 8:26:01 PM.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:24 PM |
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EmmaNick
*
Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name:
*
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by MsG
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
A phone is a necessity if you are pregnant or have children. Period.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:27 PM |
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EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name:
*
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by donegal419
Posted by Jennie0898
Look, I'm done commenting on this thread, I have my opinion and you nor anyone else is going to sway it.
I respect your opinion, however I disagree with it.
Please stop digging up comments I made pages and pages back from the other night as I will not reply from here on in.
WOW! no need to get so NASTY! i haven't been on in a few days, just skimmed through thread and happened to make my comment. i didn't read the whole thread so i didn't realize that you had made other comments. no need to freak out on me. i just made my own comment. so much for having an opinion on a forum board. jeez!
At no point did I freak out on you nor did I say you couldn't have your opinion. It's clear you didn't read what I said because I specifically stated that I RESPECT your opinion but I DISAGREE with it.
Please stop trying to have an arguement with me I'm not going to discuss this topic any further.
Thank you.
Then unsubscribe and stop replying. It's THAT easy, really.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:28 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by MsG
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
A phone is a necessity if you are pregnant or have children. Period. [/QUOTE
While I won't go without mine, a cellphone is NOT a necessity. Our parents never had one and they were fine.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:29 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by saraH
I think I would have tried to help them. Who knows their situation? As a mom, I know my kid comes first. I would skip paying the phone bill if she needed food, diapers, whatever.
But, again, I don't know their situation and I would have tried to help, if I could. That would have definitely stayed with me, too.
I think because alot of us have seen the scammers and know they are out there, we are more apt to not help because of it.
I know that sounds horrible but it is just life and I would rather give my money to someone I KNOW really needs help.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:30 PM |
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mrslobo2007
LIF Infant
Member since 12/06 209 total posts
Name:
Alison
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by Jennie0898
Posted by donegal419
Posted by Jennie0898
Look, I'm done commenting on this thread, I have my opinion and you nor anyone else is going to sway it.
I respect your opinion, however I disagree with it.
Please stop digging up comments I made pages and pages back from the other night as I will not reply from here on in.
WOW! no need to get so NASTY! i haven't been on in a few days, just skimmed through thread and happened to make my comment. i didn't read the whole thread so i didn't realize that you had made other comments. no need to freak out on me. i just made my own comment. so much for having an opinion on a forum board. jeez!
At no point did I freak out on you nor did I say you couldn't have your opinion. It's clear you didn't read what I said because I specifically stated that I RESPECT your opinion but I DISAGREE with it.
Please stop trying to have an arguement with me I'm not going to discuss this topic any further.
Thank you.
Then unsubscribe and stop replying. It's THAT easy, really.
Typical mob mentality I have seen on this site many times..'if you dont agree with the majority, get off and stop posting'
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:30 PM |
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MsG
Should be working
Member since 5/05 2824 total posts
Name:
G
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by MsG
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
A phone is a necessity if you are pregnant or have children. Period.
Oh really?  I would never have guessed!
Honestly though, Nextel? If you're broke and you need a phone, I'd think you'd opt for something cheaper. If you were responsible.
I'm not saying I don't feel bad for them, or that I wouldn't have given them money. I am 99% sure I would have. But I can also hope they get their sh&^ together enough to grow up and get their priorities straight, IF they're spending money on cellphones and not food.
High horse! Be gone!
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:32 PM |
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EmmaNick
*
Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name:
*
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Re: saw something the other days that is still bothering me
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by MsG
that's very sad, really. But it made me wonder why are they nextel-ing? yes, maybe it's a pay-as-you-go, but maybe not. and if it's not, well that poor baby whose parents want to hold on to an expensive cell plan rather than feed them well.
A phone is a necessity if you are pregnant or have children. Period. [/QUOTE
While I won't go without mine, a cellphone is NOT a necessity. Our parents never had one and they were fine.
How many give up landlines for cell phones? MANY these days since Verizon landline service is insanely expensive.
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| Posted 8/18/08 8:32 PM |
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