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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by pmpkn087
It's not so much the opinions that were stated. It is the fact that a lot of us have a difficult time with returning to work and the fact that we MUST return to work. Not everything is as easy as it seems. It is so easy to judge others. But, perhaps you should think of people's feelings before telling us how it "really" is. A lot of us preggos (like myself) and new moms have a very difficult time with the fact that we will not be able to stay home. If you look at the parenting board any given day and I'm sure you can find at least one post from a working mom describing how difficult it is to have to leave their child.
Not everyone CAN sacrafice things. As I have stated in a previous post, I don't think I can sacrafice food for my kid...because that is what I would have to do.
if this was ment to offend parents it would have been posted on the parenting board..b/c it is a general posting board i dont see anything wrong with posting for fear of offending certain pple
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Posted 10/11/06 5:22 PM  |
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pmpkn087
Life is good...
Member since 9/05 18504 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by pmpkn087
It's not so much the opinions that were stated. It is the fact that a lot of us have a difficult time with returning to work and the fact that we MUST return to work. Not everything is as easy as it seems. It is so easy to judge others. But, perhaps you should think of people's feelings before telling us how it "really" is. A lot of us preggos (like myself) and new moms have a very difficult time with the fact that we will not be able to stay home. If you look at the parenting board any given day and I'm sure you can find at least one post from a working mom describing how difficult it is to have to leave their child.
Not everyone CAN sacrafice things. As I have stated in a previous post, I don't think I can sacrafice food for my kid...because that is what I would have to do.
if this was ment to offend parents it would have been posted on the parenting board..b/c it is a general posting board i dont see anything wrong with posting for fear of offending certain pple
 I don't get it. you were speaking about stay at home moms. How could you think that moms would not be offended? no matter where it is posted.
I know you did not direct your statement towards any ONE person but perhaps should have been a little more considerate in your generalities.
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:26 PM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by pmpkn087
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Posted by pmpkn087
It's not so much the opinions that were stated. It is the fact that a lot of us have a difficult time with returning to work and the fact that we MUST return to work. Not everything is as easy as it seems. It is so easy to judge others. But, perhaps you should think of people's feelings before telling us how it "really" is. A lot of us preggos (like myself) and new moms have a very difficult time with the fact that we will not be able to stay home. If you look at the parenting board any given day and I'm sure you can find at least one post from a working mom describing how difficult it is to have to leave their child.
Not everyone CAN sacrafice things. As I have stated in a previous post, I don't think I can sacrafice food for my kid...because that is what I would have to do.
if this was ment to offend parents it would have been posted on the parenting board..b/c it is a general posting board i dont see anything wrong with posting for fear of offending certain pple
I don't get it. you were speaking about stay at home moms. How could you think that moms would not be offended? no matter where it is posted.
I know you did not direct your statement towards any ONE person but perhaps should have been a little more considerate in your generalities.
if we did that with each post,then i think the boards would be blank..mind u i did not start the thread or ask the question but i am entitled to answering it and state my opinion
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:28 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
No...i wouldn't want to be a stay at home mom
but my ideal situation would be me working part time
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:37 PM |
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jodi714
Love my little girl!
Member since 2/06 3621 total posts
Name:
Jodi
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
No...i wouldn't want to be a stay at home mom
but my ideal situation would be me working part time
Ditto
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:40 PM |
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
but my ideal situation would be me working part time
Mine too- I don't know how I will feel about returning to work and I don't think I will know until I have to actually DO it. I do love what I do, but I know it's going to be hard and stressful to juggle working and being a mom.
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:41 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
I never understand why this is always such a controversial topic. It gets right up there with BFing in public and abortion.
I really don't think Michi intended to offend anyone because I really don't think she's a malicous person at all and I don't even know her that well. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and all she was doing is stating how she would like things to be for her and her ideals for having children? What's wrong with that?
Do you want to crucify me because I had a lot of the same thing as she did? If I HAD to work FT would I? Of course but DH and I live a life that allows me to work PT (which isn't necessity but I want to). My daughter doesn't go to daycare because I don't want to send her to daycare. Does that mean I have anything against working moms who send their kids to daycare? Absolutely not. And like Steph said she discovered that she is a better mom now that she works FT. Nothing wrong with that. No two situations are alike. Everyone figures out what works for them.
Cut Michi a break, I don't think she was passing judgement or intended for this thread to be a heated debate.
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:44 PM |
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by azoodie
However, I hope to go into teaching at a college and hope that my schedule will be flexible enough to accomodate children. If we have them that is...still undecided about this.
My DH is a college professor. His schedule is FABULOUS. He only has to be on campus three days a week (though two of those days are very long, longer than a regular work day). We will only need part time daycare and then he will be home- I do envy the fact that he will have more time at home with the baby. but I love that our child will have a dad who's so hands on. I teach also (middle school) and I feel like we're very lucky with both schedules.
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:46 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by monkeybride
I never understand why this is always such a controversial topic. It gets right up there with BFing in public and abortion.
come on now..
You can't understand why topics get controversial...
come on now...
it is obvious that topics that are held near and dear are going to get more on the controversial side..
Especially if people feel that they are being judged/criticized
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:47 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by monkeybride
I never understand why this is always such a controversial topic. It gets right up there with BFing in public and abortion.
come on now..
You can't understand why topics get controversial...
come on now...
it is obvious that topics that are held near and dear are going to get more on the controversial side..
Especially if people feel that they are being judged/criticized
I guess that makes sense. I guess for me I just put this in the category as everyone has to do what's best for them and everyone is going to have a different opinion.
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:49 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
Personally I think pple use money as an excuse.. that the cost of living is high and they need 2 incomes, but honestly i think whatever financial sacrifices need to be made are worth it to be home with my child for a few yrs...
example..only having 1 old car, not 2 new ones... dont live in a location where living is overly expensive..
excuse?
why would it be an excuse?
for whatever reason they are making their life what they want of it...THAT isn't an excuse...
Sure i could move somewhere else, sacrifice being away from the people i love..
Do without decent cars, a house, trips, shopping, eating out when i want...whatnots
BUT why should i...?
I want a house on LI to raise my kids in, i want decent cars to drive my kids around, i want to be able to buy a shirt or dress i really like without freaking out...
it is my choice/way of life....not an excuse
SAHM's isn't a requirement to raising children...
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:51 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
And i must say...
if i had all the money in the world...
i coudn't be a SAHM...
that is just me..
could that change....maybe. But i guess i will see....
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| Posted 10/11/06 5:53 PM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by monkeybride
I never understand why this is always such a controversial topic. It gets right up there with BFing in public and abortion.
I really don't think Michi intended to offend anyone because I really don't think she's a malicous person at all and I don't even know her that well. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and all she was doing is stating how she would like things to be for her and her ideals for having children? What's wrong with that?
Do you want to crucify me because I had a lot of the same thing as she did? If I HAD to work FT would I? Of course but DH and I live a life that allows me to work PT (which isn't necessity but I want to). My daughter doesn't go to daycare because I don't want to send her to daycare. Does that mean I have anything against working moms who send their kids to daycare? Absolutely not. And like Steph said she discovered that she is a better mom now that she works FT. Nothing wrong with that. No two situations are alike. Everyone figures out what works for them.
Cut Michi a break, I don't think she was passing judgement or intended for this thread to be a heated debate.
thank you :) im learning that on this board ur not allowed to have an opinion..its easier to just keep our mouths shut or u get flamed for having independent thought or an opinion..
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:00 PM |
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Tany
Becoming a different woman
Member since 5/05 24460 total posts
Name:
Tania
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:01 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
thank you :) im learning that on this board ur not allowed to have an opinion..its easier to just keep our mouths shut or u get flamed for having independent thought or an opinion..
i really don't think i could ever be that way...
i would rather get flamed and stand by my opinion than not post at all
But i also think that if people are going to have a reaction to what i say....well that is an opinion too...and should be said.
to each their own i guess..
i just couldn't not post because of the reaction i MIGHT get..
Message edited 10/11/2006 6:06:29 PM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:05 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:05 PM |
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Michi
My Love
Member since 5/05 31600 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by muchinluvmichi
thank you :) im learning that on this board ur not allowed to have an opinion..its easier to just keep our mouths shut or u get flamed for having independent thought or an opinion..
i really don't think i could ever be that way...
i would rather get flamed and stand by my opinion than not post at all
But i also think that if people are going to have a reaction to what i say....well that is an opinion too...and should be said.
to each their own i guess..
i just couldn't not post because of the reaction i MIGHT get..
yeah but arguing with pple who wont even listen to ur side of how u feel is a waste of my breathe and i dont have the time or the energy..its like fighting a wall lol ur not going to get anywhere
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:08 PM |
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Tany
Becoming a different woman
Member since 5/05 24460 total posts
Name:
Tania
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
Thanks girl !!
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:08 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by muchinluvmichi
yeah but arguing with pple who wont even listen to ur side of how u feel is a waste of my breathe and i dont have the time or the energy..its like fighting a wall lol ur not going to get anywhere
well then maybe your solution isn't so much to not post your opinion...but rather to ignore the responses to it
Again...i can't do that...I will always say how i feel and defend it..
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:20 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
Unless I missed it and I will admit I scanned a lot of the posts I don't think Michi was saying what anyone was doing was wrong so I'm not sure why she got ganged up on? She was just saying what her plan is and how she thinks it should be for her when she has kids.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:23 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by Redhead
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
Unless I missed it and I will admit I scanned a lot of the posts I don't think Michi was saying what anyone was doing was wrong so I'm not sure why she got ganged up on? She was just saying what her plan is and how she thinks it should be for her when she has kids.
i don't think that michi was saying that a persons choice was wrong..
i think Tania made an opinion on the topic ITSELF...
NOT michi
Message edited 10/11/2006 6:29:52 PM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:29 PM |
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Tany
Becoming a different woman
Member since 5/05 24460 total posts
Name:
Tania
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by Redhead
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
Unless I missed it and I will admit I scanned a lot of the posts I don't think Michi was saying what anyone was doing was wrong so I'm not sure why she got ganged up on? She was just saying what her plan is and how she thinks it should be for her when she has kids.
i don't think that michi was saying what a persons person choice was wrong..
i think Tania made an opinion on the topic ITSELF...
NOT michi
ditto, to each it's own.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:30 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
But as far as the ganing up is concerned...
well ...Michi made a HUGE generalization and almost an accusation...that for the people who HAVE to work to afford their LIFE STYLE CHOICE....are making some excuse
There is no excuses being made...
IT IS A PERSONAL LIFESTYLE CHOICE
for whatever the reason may be..
I flipped through the thread and it did come across as very judgemental and presumptuous...
So that is why you saw the reactions...
when people feel judged ....well there is never a good reaction to it
Message edited 10/11/2006 6:34:42 PM.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:32 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by Redhead
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by Redhead
Posted by Aliasmom
the fact of the matter is that everyone does what they think is right for their families, period.
well said Tania..
there is no right or wrong..
Unless I missed it and I will admit I scanned a lot of the posts I don't think Michi was saying what anyone was doing was wrong so I'm not sure why she got ganged up on? She was just saying what her plan is and how she thinks it should be for her when she has kids.
i don't think that michi was saying that a persons choice was wrong..
i think Tania made an opinion on the topic ITSELF...
NOT michi
I guess that came out wrong. I knew what Tania was saying. I guess I was kind of agreeing with her in that this is just a to each his own topic and an opinion poll should be just that not everyone jumping all over everyone.
Sometimes I hate posting because I feel like I never get my point across the right way.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:35 PM |
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Jessica
I'm a mommy :)
Member since 1/06 7322 total posts
Name:
~Jess~
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Re: Spinoff to SAHM...
Posted by neeniebean86
for ME PERSONALLY (not making a sweeping generalization about ANYONE's work/at home situation)... But, i really don't think that i would feel personally Fulfilled with only being a mom. Now, i dont mean "only" as if it should devalue the role of motherhood and ALL that it encompasses... but, i've worked really hard in school- i still do, and probably always will continue in my education in one way or another- and i feel like i would wasting my talents by not exercising them in my field. NO, this does NOT mean that i think that SAHM are wasting their talent, but that MY HAPPINESS and sense of fulfillment comes from wearing many hats... and feeling like i'm making my OWN contribution to the world.
I'm sure that there will be days that i feel jealous of the SAHM's because i just want to stay home and playwith my babies all day.... and maybe my whole opinion of what important VS. what's Not...will all change when my kids are born. but, knowing my personality... i dont think i'd be able to stay home for very long before going stir crazy 
this is exactly how o feel neenie!!!So yes i will work fulltime.
Anthony will most likely have a compay that he can work from home so he will be a stay at home dad many days.
I think daycare is great for kids. THe socialize and learn sooo early in life.
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| Posted 10/11/06 6:36 PM |
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